


A Little Green

by Dan_Ingram



Category: Angel: the Series
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-04
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2017-12-10 10:11:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 94,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/784881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dan_Ingram/pseuds/Dan_Ingram
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by Spuffyduds' You Think She's an Open Book (but you don't know which page to turn to).</p><p>Fred left behind a daughter in Pylea. The Fang Gang, stuck in hell, finds her. A series of short stories and drabbles about what comes next.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jenny

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [You Think She's an Open Book (but you don't know which page to turn to)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26235) by [spuffyduds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spuffyduds/pseuds/spuffyduds). 



Angel  
Hell  
He doesn’t say why he wants them to come, not exactly. Hell had ears, it was no different from any other place in that regard, after all. But he adds ‘Fluffy’ and ‘Taco cave of crazy’ (and to Spike, an empathic ‘Do not bring Illyria under any circumstances whatsoever!’) to make sure their curiosity is peaked, and sits back and waits.

  
It takes a few days for them to reply back, and promise to be there, but in the end, they all make it on the same day.

Lorne sighed as he saw what was left of ‘the old gang’. Angel looks like he’s been dragged behind a truck, Wesley’s fashion is five years out of date (and a ghost), and Spike is, well, Spike. And as beaten up and beaten down as they were, they were still the best of what was left of his friends.

It wasn’t the lack of a real sun, the overwhelming armies of demons or heat and humidity that absolutely ruined his best suits that made Los Angeles hell. No, for Lorne what made LA hell was seeing his friends like this.

But, Lorne had found, even Hell had miracles.

“Okay Kermit, we’re all here,” said Spike, “what’s this all about then?”

“It’s a surprise,” smiled Lorne, which quickly flipped upside down when he saw how they tensed.

“Really guys?” Lorne said, “even you, Wesley? You’re just a ghost! What do you have to be scared of anymore?”

“You’d be surprised, Lorne,” Wesley said, “and you’ll have to forgive us, but may I remind you this is hell? Even if you don’t intend us harm, who’s to say that you haven’t been forced to bring us all together by someone who does?”

“And besides, some of us have some lounging to do by the pool side,” Spike added.

“Always the humanitarian,” Angel huffed, “I’m sorry Lorne, but they’re right. What’s so important that the three of us had to be here together?”

“And that Illyria not be,” Spike added, “can’t say she’s the most fun at a party, but she’s still one of us, mate.”

“You’ll see,” the smile returns to Lorne’s face, and he ushers them to follow him.

Angel studied his old friend, and sees an energy in him that he hadn’t seen in Lorne since before the Senior Partners threw all of LA into hell. An enthusiasm that seemed to evaporate like a mist when Fred…

“Welcome to what used to be Embassy Row,” Lorne led them threw a white picket fence, and like a car salesmen, swept his hands towards the little green skinned girl, wearing a yellow dress patterned with flowers. The young girl didn’t seem to take notice of them at all, but was writing something in the sandbox with a straight stick while a young woman sat a few feet away, reading a book, but glancing up every now and then to keep an eye on the child.

“Ta da!”

“What, is she your cousin or something?” said Spike. He looked at Lorne and back to the child. Their coloring was different, hers was a light lime green in contrast to Lorne’s green, lizard like skin. In fact, if it weren’t for her skin color and small horns, Spike would have easily taken her for just a normal kid.

The young child heard the new voices, felt the eyes cast upon her and her head snapped in their direction.

That was the light bulb moment for everyone. The light brown hair, the lips, her cheekbones and then finally, her eyes. Her eyes told it all.

“Fred…” said Wesley.

“Blood…eeee…hell,” is all Spike can think to say.

And again, Lorne’s smile fades as he sees Wesley almost on the verge of tears while Spike, who threw himself at anything without a second thought, simply stood there in shock.

The exception was the big man himself. Angel said nothing, but Lorne sees him put on a practiced fake smile and realizes that he’s not doing it for himself, but for the little girl.

“Hello there,” Angel bent down to look at her better. Some part of him just needed to memorize her features, “what’s your name?”

“Jenny,” she says, eyes cast down.

“Jenny? That’s a very pretty name. Mine’s Angel.”

“Hello,” Jenny said, without meeting his eyes.

“What are you doing here?” Angel looked at the sand. There were all kinds of different symbols, but they looked consistent, a series of pattern…

Jenny stood up and dragged her feet through the sand, destroying everything.

“I’m tired,” Jenny said softly. Her words are carefully selected, as if she’s just learned the language, “can I go to bed?”

“Of course pumpkin, you go get some rest,” Lorne patted Jenny on the head, and she quickly rushed inside.

“Lorne?”

In all the shock and raw emotion, the four realize that they hadn’t even met the girl’s caregiver.

“Oh! Ashley! Please meet my friends,” Lorne introduced them in short order, “guys, this peach is Ashley. She was a kindergarten teacher, before everyone, ya know, everyone became too afraid to send their kids to school.”

“Ah yes, the 90s. Terrible era that,” said Spike.

“Anyways, she’s been watching Jenny for me, and she hasn’t been too much trouble, has she?”

Ashley snorted, and then shook her head.

“Honestly, I barely know she’s there half the time. She spends all day drawing in the sandbox, or in her room.”

“Same ol’ story,” Lorne said with a sad chuckle, “well, why don’t you run along and get some dinner, and we’ll see you tomorrow, bright eyed and bushy tailed?”

“Sounds good. It was lovely meeting you,” Ashley offered her hand to Wesley to shake first, but when it passed through like smoke, she politely excused herself.

“Smells a little like her,” Spike says, but then shook her head, “but no way. No bloody way.”

“Lets discuss this upstairs,” Lorne says. He leads the stunned trio into the house and upstairs, but motioned for them to be silent.

Lorne was surprised to discover that, even though he was a lord of hell, there was still room for diplomacy here and there.

And where ever there was diplomacy, there was duplicity. Some demons of hell were not exactly familiar with certain human inventions, like ‘sound proofing’ and ‘one sided mirrors’.

The room was opposite of Jenny, and they saw the young girl not laying on the bed, but sleeping on the floor atop of some dresses she must have pulled out of the closet and strewn about the floor for reasons known only to her.

“Who the bloody hell has a one way mirror and a sound proofed room across from the main bedroom?” Spike said.

“You don’t want to know,” said Lorne, “like, super don’t want to know. Just know that I made sure they burned through two bottles of cleaner before I even thought to give her the room.”

“Should have had them sweep, too,” Spike looked down at a small pile of dry wall dust on the floor.

“You listen to music in here too?” Angel asked.

“I’m sorry, Angel cake?”

Angel held up an Ipod, “Found this on the floor.”

“Oh, I gave that to Jenny, full of country music” Lorne shook his head, “kids, they get everywhere, ya know?”

“Not Fred’s,” Wesley said, as if it were Gospel, “she’s not. It’s impossible.”

“No Wes,” Angel says gently, “it’s not. Look at Groo…”

“Who looks considerably different than that…thing!”

“Hey now!” Lorne snapped, “that is not a thing, that’s a little girl!”

“I’m sorry,” Wesley stepped back, “but you know what I mean. She can’t be Fred’s daughter, She would have told us! Why wouldn’t she have told us?”

“Think you just answered your own question there, watcher boy,” Spike folded his hands across his chest, and leaned backagainst the wall, “even if we’d never say it, what would be the first question we’d ask ourselves?”

“’Why didn’t you tell us sooner’?” Angel nodded.

“And who’s to say she even thought she was alive? It was a little before your time, but believe me Wes, life as a slave is no picnic.”

“That’s…” Wesley shook his head, “she was with us for years. Why never say anything?”

“Remember when her parents first came?” said Angel, “remember what happened? She tried to run away, because seeing her parents made everything, Pylea, demons, vampires, everything real. Not vampires, or green lounge owners. What made everything real was her parents, not being back on earth, and most certainly not us.”

“That…doesn’t mean anything.”

“Denial is a powerful tool,” Spike cast his eyes at the ceiling, “back in ‘78, me and Dru met this real stuck up ponce. He swore up and down that there were no such things as vampires, demons, nothing like that, and anyone who said otherwise was a liar. So we decided to set this guy straight.

We kidnap him, and introduce him to all our friends. From The Master, to Clem. And this guy, he’s screaming and crying and wetting himself the whole time. And I mean…”

“Yes Spike, we get it,” interrupted Angel.

“Anyway, we only do it for the weekend, see? Then knocked him out, splashed him with some cheap booze, cleaned him up, and the next day, the very next day! Bloke didn’t recognize us crossing the street,” Spike said, “though he did eat a gun a week later.”

“That’s…certainly more elaborate than your usual fair,” Angel observed.

“We were…*cough* rollplayingasyou,” Spike muttered under his breath.

Angel chuckled, gallows humor being all he had left these days.

“Fred was never suicidal,” Wesley countered.

“No, but she’d just left the nest, right?” Spike said, “young girl, first time away from home. No Watcher school teaching her that things do go dump in the night, and all of a sudden she’s in a whole other world? Where she’s the slave of green nasties and not even considered human? That she clawed back to sanity was proof of how tough she really was.”

“And how much did she really talk about it, Wes?” said Angel, “I mean the gritty details. How she escaped the shock collar, where did she get the supplies for her cave? How she was made a slave in the first place?”

“We never pressed her for what happened, and that was our mistake. We acted as her coping mechanism, we…we should have looked harder. Tried to…”

“Hey, hey!” Spike snapped his fingers in Angel’s face, “past is past. Lets focus on what we have here, eh?”

“I…” Wesley tried to think of something, anything, “Could she be like The Key? Something like that?”

“Her name is Dawn, you ghostly ass, and she’s just as real as any of us,” Spike said, “and more than some. Now, does anyone remember her before now? No? Then move. On.”

“Wolfram and Hart, they…” Wesley said, “she’s…something out of a lab, or…”

“Her hands are calloused, and look at her back, towards the top.”

Wesley did, and he saw lines of discoloration that meant…

“…this is impossible.”

“Said that already four eyes.”

“And look at her muscle tone. I haven’t seen anything like that in over a hundred years,” said Angel, “no baby fat whatsoever.”

“So she was a slave, that doesn’t prove anything!” Wesley took his glasses off and cleaned them on his shirt, even though they couldn’t have had a speck of dirt on them.

“I know what will,” Angel said, “Lorne, just how much education are half, I mean hybrids generally allowed?”

“Angel?” Lorne gave his old friend a ‘why does it matter?’ kind of look.

“Just humor me. How much are they allowed?”

“Nothing past manual or degrading labor, and I really do mean nothing,” Lorne replied, “if any…ah…hybrid is caught learning without their, umm…owner’s permission or very good reason, they’re whipped along with five others selected at random, left to hang by their wrists for four days and then they get mean. And that’s if the ahh…owner doesn’t decide to get creative.”

“That settles it, then,” said Angel, “she’s Fred’s daughter.”

“What, you have DNA vision now, Captain Forehead?” Spike said.

“Hey, I ran a detective agency,” Angel said defensively, “I can detect!”

“Oh bullocks. That was just an excuse for you to run around and play hero! You couldn’t find a clue right in front of your face.”  
“Funny you should say that, Spike. Look at the dresses. See how they lead to the wall? And what do you think they were hung on?”

“…hangers?”

“Coat hangers,” Angel said, “metal, I’d bet my soul on it.”

“And this matters why?” said Spike.

“Just…just wait,” Angel said, “this is my Parlor scene, and I’m the detective here. Lorne, you have pretty good hearing right? It’s a…green thing, right?”

“You better believe Angel baby. You would not believe the juicy gossip these babies have picked up over the years…”

“And again, this all matters because?” Spike rolled his eyes.

“Put it together, Spike. Look at the dresses,” Angel said, “they lead to the wall here. Metal carries vibrations, sound. Remember the drywall dust, that Ipod that was here? I know in my heart that that little girl in there is Fred’s daughter… because without any formal education, she’s developed, tested and then concealed a listening devise using nothing but metal coat hangers, dresses and duct tape.”

“Then, that means…” Lorne looked at Jenny, and saw her trembling even though only a minute ago she seemed to be fast asleep.

“She’s listening to us right now.”

“Please…” Jenny shot up to her knees with the speed of a startled cat, head bowed. She turned around, and lowered the back of her dress, revealing an ugly web of scars, “this cow asks for twenty lashes. Please, twenty lashes, I deserve it…”

Spike couldn’t keep himself from growling.

“We can’t solve this by punching someone,” Angel said with an even voice, “I’ll handle it. I just need some candy and time alone to fix this.”

“Oh, big tall and dark is bringing the little bird candy,” Spike rolled his eyes, “you’d make father of the year easy.”

“Shut up, Spike.”


	2. Interview with a vampire

oooOOooo

Despite what he’d told his friends, Angel had his doubts. Not that Jenny wasn’t Fred’s daughter, at this point it would have taken a DNA report to convince him otherwise. But didn’t mean she was completely innocent, even if she was, well, completely innocent herself. For all he knew, she was a genetically engineered monster programmed to eat his face the moment she caught his scent.

In a world where a sibling and memories could be created out of thin air, skepticism was survival 101. Weirder things had happened.

But if this wasn’t a plot, if this really was simply Fred’s daughter…

She was real or she wasn’t.

Angel realized he really didn’t know how to feel about either option. He just knew that he had to find the answer and then go from there.

That was why Angel stood at the entrance of Jenny’s room, and here in the pits of Hell, and thought back to his time as Angelus. Not for the purposes of guilt and shame (though there was plenty of that to be found), but to remember how he had stalked certain prey that had been ‘extinct’ for over a hundred years.  
Where most vampires killed as a matter of habit or subsistence, Angelus was different. Blood was a distraction to him, the same way food was to humans. Required for survival, and sometimes enjoyable but rarely an end in and of itself.  
What made Angelus stalk the night was the complete and utter destruction of the human spirit. And to that end, there was no greater master than him.

Angelus saw suffering not just as an art, but a calling, a passion. And like everything else, there were challenges and even a science to it. Druillas didn’t just happen, after all. It took a lot of time, effort and dead virgins to create ‘art’ like that.

So, to keep his talents sharp, Angelus made a target of a slave at least once a decade. Most of his kind ignored them for anything other than food, but not him. Spike once asked why his Sire bothered with pathetic prey, to which Angelus replied calmly.

“Why does a man climb a mountain? Because its there.”

Spike never got it, not that Angelus cared. All he cared about was perfecting his art. How do you destroy the spirit of someone who has nothing to call their own, not even the clothes on their back? How do you tear down someone already at the bottom rung of society?

The depth of Angelus’ ruthlessness knew no bounds, and he was ready to prove that every single day.

However, to accomplish that, Angelus had to befriend them, to break bread and sometimes even share a home with them. He studied them with an expert eye, worked his way into their confidence, sometimes even into their family and then betrayed them with a smirk and a laugh.

Angelus was a hunter of the human spirit, and he always knew how to draw out his prey.

But when the Civil War came, Angelus lost interest. As slavery died as a large institution, so did his interest in them. And decades later, Angelus would reflect that he spent more time building them up than he ever did tearing them down.

And just like every other crime or atrocity he’d committed, Angel remembered everything.

Only now maybe, just maybe, today those terrible lessons could help him find the truth.

“Jenny? May I come in?” Angel knocked on the door just hard enough to open it.

“Puh…please, please come in,” Jenny said meekly. She had turned towards Angel, but kept her head meekly bowed, “this cow nuh…never meant to spy on her betters, I…”

“Jenny, I’m not mad about that at all,” Angel knelt down and picked up a dress, revealing the metal wire underneath, “could you tell me who taught you to do this?”

“Nuh…no one,” Jenny said quickly.

“Have you done anything like this before?”

Jenny shook her head, “Never! I swear!”

“Then how’d you know it would work?” said Angel.

“I…” Jenny’s small body began to wrack with sobs, and Angel felt like scum. Having been caught in a lie, he had no doubt Jenny was terrified of what would happen next. From Jenny’s perspective, he was still an unknown quality. And to a slave, an unknown quality was as dangerous as a lit match in a fireworks factory. One wrong move, and everything got worse.

“It’s okay, shhhh,” Angel placed a careful hand on her shoulder, “I’m not angry, and I won’t hurt you, I promise.”

Jenny gave him a mixed look of fear and confusion, and Angel knew why. Sometimes those who pretended to be kind could be the cruelest. Angel still remembered how one slave master offered to teach his slaves to read and write, to uplift them despite their humble station but used a book written in French to teach them. And when they failed, he said it was only proof of their own inferiority, how they deserved their lot in life.

Angelus got a chuckle out of it for months.

And not being punished for an infraction? Especially something like this? For this young girl, it was as if (what she knew as) law and order had completely disappeared.

“I didn’t mean to upset you. I just thought it was very impressive,” Angel took a small bag of M&M out of his coat, and took a few bites, “would you like some?”

Jenny reached out a hand, and was shocked to come back with the entire bag of candy. She looked at it with the awe someone might look at a roll of hundred dollar bills, and then back to Angel.

“You can keep it.”

Jenny looked at Angel, and then back to the candy. She took a few experimental bites, before she began shoveling the candy in her mouth. She glanced back at Angel, each time asking for permission with her eyes.

When Angel didn’t stop her, Jenny wolfed them down as if she hadn’t eaten in months. Angel expected as much. A life of slavery meant that your life depended on your body and your ability to work. Anything that might help with that, like say a few scraps of food, was as precious as gold.

And food was one of the only things Jenny was ever given that couldn’t be taken away on a whim.

Angel waited politely for her to finish the candy, before he continued his ‘interview’.

“It was very clever. Could you tell me why you did it?”

Jenny looked at the floor, and muttered, “I…just wanted to know why. Why you care about something like me…”

If she were anyone else, Angel was certain he’d know what to say. That she wasn’t something, but someone. Because everyone was special and everything in her life up until now was wrong, and that she just deserved so much better. Because she just might be the daughter of a woman he knew and cared so very much about.

But her mother was dead, her body a vessel for a God while her father was a rapist who’d just as soon kill her as sell her, and no matter what she deserved, her life was so terrible that falling into hell was considered a step up. And despite all that, she was still in terrible danger, not just being in Hell, but merely by being associated with him.

“Because I do,” said Angel, thankful that Spike wasn’t present to hear that. Angel moved to the bed, and sat down.

“My hand!” Jenny set the candy down and lifted her left hand, trembling, “I should be punished! Please!”

Angel recognized the tactic instantly. It was a double bluff, a means of diffusing their master’s anger while proving their complete and utter submission to their master’s will. But at the same time, if luck was on their side, their master would never take them up on the offer.

After all, it was like tearing out the steering wheel of a car because the tail lights were out.

The reaction made Angel curious, so he played a hunch.

He lifted the mattress, and tucked in between the box spring he found a half dozen books. There was an old Times magazine, a magazine catalog, a worn math book, there was no common thread between them other than, Angel suspected, that they would never be missed.

Jenny put her hand over her mouth, as if she were about to throw up.

“Hey, hey! It’s okay, it’s okay!” Angel was at her side in a blink, and pulled her into a hug.

This simple act of compassion, of concern was like a release valve to the young girl. She fell into Angel’s chest, crying in relief.  
In the last ten minutes, he’d discovered almost everything about her, and wasn’t the least bit angry. To her, it was like receiving a pardon from death row.

How much time had passed before Jenny calmed down, Angel didn’t know. But when he was certain she wouldn’t be hysterical, he picked up the first book as if it were made of glass, and set it on the nightstand.

“You don’t have to hide these anymore,” Angel said. He removed them all, showed them to Jenny, and set them all within reach, “in fact, you can ask Lorne for more.”

“More…?” Jenny’s voice cracked with a chuckle of disbelief, and she had a smile that reached her face, “you really mean that?”

That look of inquisitiveness, salivating at the promise of knowledge while still being able to appreciate the sheer size, in all his hundreds of years of life, he’d only seen that look on one woman.

“I do,” said Angel.

In his head, he was running off a checklist. If Jenny was some artificial construct, some lab creation, whoever created her deserved an award. The scars, the hidden stash of books, the calloused hands, there was almost no doubt in Angel’s mind. There was just one last thing before Angel lost all doubt, but it was also the cruelest.

_Please understand, Fred._

“Lorne said you could sing?” said Angel.

“Sing…?”

Angel sang a few bars of ‘Row row your boat’, and Jenny nodded numbly. She then began, timidly.

_“The…There's a yellow rose in Texas, That I’m going to see.”_

Angel felt a pang in his chest. He could remember a time when Fred had spent all day humming the lyrics. At the time, it was a little annoying. Like a fly he couldn’t swat. Now…

_“Nobody else could miss her, Not as much as I.”_

Intellectually, Angel knew that this was the last nail in the coffin (not a phrase he cared for). Jenny’s home dimension barely had a concept of music, and the lyrics were off. Jenny wasn’t singing a song she had been taught to memorize or programmed into her mind, it was something she remembered and barely at that.

_“She cried so I left her It like to broked my heart.”_

“If…” Jenny stopped singing and put her hands over her mouth, as if to keep something inside of her from falling out, “…if I…please, let me stop. I don’t…please, please, please no more!”

“Hey hey, it’s alright!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry!”

Angel hugged the girl as the tears streamed down her face, and he could almost see the thin rapport he’d been able to build with her falling in her tears.

By definition, as a slave, Jenny had almost nothing to call her own. Not the clothes on her back, not the fingers on her hand, the eyes in her head, or even her life. She had absolutely nothing that her master couldn’t take away on a cruel, casual whim.  
All she had that was her and hers alone, were memories. Angelus had found that often slaves would take some small part of themselves, a nickname their mother gave them, a memory of kindness from a loved one, something good and pure and just theirs, and would lock it away deep inside. They would maybe share it with the other slaves, but never would they allow a master to ‘see it’.

And that was what Jenny’s half remembered song was to her. It was the only link she shared to the mother that loved her, a mother she barely remembered, a mother that was now gone. It was the only thing that they couldn’t take from her, until now.

Angel could almost Angelus' slow clap.

“You don’t have to sing anymore,” said Angel, “and you never have to again, unless you want to.”

Jenny, her eyes stained with tears, finally were able to meet Angel’s.

“You…you mean it?”

“I swear it,” said Angel.

Jenny’s eyes lit up in disbelief.

“Look, it’s been a long day,” said Angel, “maybe you should get some rest.”

Jenny nodded, and was beginning to lay down on the floor before Angel stopped her.

“Maybe you should try the bed,” Angel suggested with a warm smile, “it’s a lot more comfortable than the floor.”

“I…I can’t,” Jenny said. She looked at the bed with the awe most people reserved for mansions and expensive jewels, “it’s not for someone like…”

Angel realized that the bed barely looked like it had been used at all. Jenny had likely thought that it just being there was either a test of her submission, or an accident, that someone just hadn’t come and taken it yet.

“It’s yours, and you should use it,” Angel pulled back the sheets, and helped her up into bed. He tucked her in gently, trying to ignore how Jenny seemed to be in pure awe of the fact that she was allowed an actual bed all to herself.

“Angel?” Jenny looked at him with hopeful eye, “are you real? I mean, I know if you weren’t real, you’d say you were real to make me think you were real, but if you are real and this is real, and…”

“I’m real, Jenny,” Angel said, “why do you ask?”

“Because you look like a cow, but you’re not,” Jenny said carefully. Her eyes studied Angel’s face, looking for any hint of disapproval.

“Why do you say that?” Angel was baffled. Most people just assumed that he was still a vampire despite the fact that the Senior Partners had returned his humanity, but how could this young girl have reached the same conclusion now that he was human?

“You don’t move like them at all,” said Jenny, “everything about you is different from them.”

“Of…course,” Angel said, “well, Jenny, I’m real, and I promise that I will always protect…”

Angel was interrupted by a snort. Jenny was already fast asleep, for real this time.

“Right.”

Angel made his way down the stairs briskly, and when he came out he saw Lorne, flanked by two of his thugs, arguing with what looked to be several members of his race about something. Spike and Wesley hung back just far enough to be able to hear, but didn’t intervene.

“What’s this about?” Angel looked at Wesley.

“Apparently these two are petitioning for Jenny’s return,” Wesley replied, “they’re being surprisingly gentle about it, actually.”

“Shame,” Angel strolled past one of Lorne’s men, plucking free a sword that hung from its hip, “I might actual feel guilty about this.”

“Oh, hey Angel,” Lorne turned to his old friend, “have a good talk? Don’t worry, these guys aren’t making any threats, just begging in a polite and classy fashion for their slave back. It would almost be cute, if it weren’t for the racism and dehumanization of it all.”

“Then this is probably just a misunderstanding,” Angel said with a smile, “Spike?”

Angel stabbed the first Deathwok demon in the knee, and then twisted the sword to the side, before pulling it out. The man hadn’t even begun to fall backwards before Angel smashed his boot into the wound.

The demon fell on his back, and screamed for mercy when he saw Angel standing over him. Holding the sword in both hands, Angel slammed it through his shoulder.

Angel glanced over his shoulder, and saw that Spike had taken care of the second man. He then turned back to the first.

“There seems to be some confusion,” Angel growled, “that cow doesn’t belong to you. It doesn’t belong to Lorne. That thing belongs to me, to do with however, whatever, I want. He’s just holding it for me.”

Angel twisted the sword to emphasize his point.

“Is. That. Clear?”

“…yes,” squeaked the Demon.

Lorne waited until the two had slinked off before he turned to Angel with a face contorted in anger.

“What…the hell…was that?” Lorne demanded.

“They wanted to know why she was important to you. Then they would have stopped being polite and tried to use her as leverage,” Angel said, “now they won’t.”

“What did you discover about the girl?” Wesley said.

“That she has too many rough edges to be anything but real.”

“I think you underestimate the Senior Partners,” suggested Wesley.

“And I think you overestimate them,” Angel countered, “and even if she’s a fake, something brewed up in a lab, then someone wants us to think she’s Fred’s. Which means they’ll put her in danger to get to us just the same.”

And then he chuckled.

The chuckle went from mild amusement, then broke into bell wracking laughter. Angel laughed so hard he fell to one knee, and his friends exchanged an awkward glance, wondering if their friend had finally lost it.

“Angel…? Just what’s so amusing?” Wesley said finally.

“You…haha…don’t get it?” Angel swept his hand towards the bloody skies, “the Senior Partners…hahahaha…they sent us to hell! This entire city! Whoosh! Down the toilet! Fire and brimstone!”

“And this is funny how?” said Spike.

Angel wiped away a tear and with a big, goofy smile on his face, said, “They sent us all to Hell, millions of people and what happened? We found ourselves an angel.”

Spike snorted, and then fell into a fit of laughter, followed immediately by Lorne. Wesley just shook his head and rolled his eyes.

“Alright,” Angel rubbed his eyes, and then stood up straight. Angel took a deep, calming breath. The stench of blood and sulfur barely registered.

Lorne, Spike and Wesley saw it, but didn’t believe it. In the span of a few breathes, the Angel they knew, the one that inspired them all to fight for just one brief second of freedom for the entire human race, had returned.

Because when Angel had a cause to fight for, he was a man to be reckoned with. But when he had someone to fight for, he was a force of nature.

“Lets go to work.”


	3. Far from Home

It wouldn’t until years later that Jenny learned how LA was returned to the mortal plane, how the Senior Partners were forced it reverse themselves and how all the people slaughtered returned, with their memories intact.

It wasn’t because it was too hard for her to hear what happened to the people she considered her family.

No, it was because the sheer terror of going from a bed in a Hell infested LA, to waking up in the woods of Pylea was as fresh in her mind years later as the day it happened, an open wound that festered for years.

Jenny woke up in the dirt and grass, raining pouring down on her. The cold air on her horns was like an electric jolt, and she shot up a wild animal.

“Nonononono…”

Once glance at the sky confirmed her worst fears. Two suns.

Home.

For a brief moment, Jenny began to wonder if LA, Lorne and Angel were all a dream, a fantasy she’d created in her own mind, as if she’d become as lost in her own mind like her mother.

But one look down, seeing the white floral dress that Ashley had given her, confirmed her worst fears.

It was real. There were people who cared for her. She wasn’t a slave. A cow.

And that was over.

Now she was just an escaped, demon blooded cow. It didn’t matter that she hadn’t actually run away, that she never disobeyed an Overseer in her life.

All that mattered was that she was alone in the woods with no owner in sight. Since the uprising, it was worse than a simple death sentence.

The young girl walked in one direction, then another, like an animal pacing its cage. Just thinking of what direction to head in was dizzying. With each step it felt as if the world were turning upside down, and it wasn’t before long that Jenny felt short of breath, indecision and fear tearing her apart as the sheer weight of the entire world seemed to weigh on her shoulders.

“Why?” Jenny fell to her knees, and curled up into a ball, mud clinging to her once white dress, “why did they leave?”

“They didn’t, sweetie. They’re coming, I promise.”

Jenny’s eyes went wide, and she jumped to her feet.

Nothing.

“You can’t see me,” said the voice. Jenny recognized the voice as feminine, but nothing else, “but I need you to trust me.”

“Why?” Jenny snapped without even thinking, “what do you want? Who…what are you?”

“Smart, just like your mom,” said the voice, “let’s just call me a family friend. And I want to help you.”

“I don’t believe you,” Jenny growled. Years of pain boiled over, “you lie! You! All! Lie!”

Jenny then clasped her hands over her mouth, realizing that anyone could be listening.

If there was a time she ever felt more alone in the world, Jenny couldn’t remember it. And she had no shortage of memories of being alone.

“Well, okay, that’s a little harsh,” said the voice, “tell me, little lady, you have anywhere else to go?”

Jenny shook her head, and wiped the tears from her face.

“Well then you need to get walking, honey. Go straight, and when you see the double tree, turn left.” 

Jenny, not seeing any other choice, went in the direction she was told.

While she walked, the voice in Jenny’s head, from her perspective, was determined to taunt her. It said that she was a pretty girl, that it must run in the family, that she was so big to have come from someone so small.

Jenny realized that if she wasn’t mad (it did run in the family), if this voice was somehow real, then it knew her mother better than Jenny ever did.

And made the little girl angry. Angrier than she had ever been in her entire life.

Her mother, a vague memory of a woman who made toys for her out of discarded twigs, rope and cloth, was all Jenny had. It was all any cow really had. And here some strange voice was, just flaunting how much closer she had been to her only family. Truth or lies, it still felt like a knife to Jenny’s heart.

Jealousy, grief and anger curdled together until Jenny could barely hear the voice over the pounding of her own heart and see past the tears in her eyes.

But, finally…”

“Hey, hey listen!”

Jenny stopped in her tracks, and looked through her tears to see a knight in the distance, standing on the ledge above her. He was looking away from her at the moment, but all he needed to do was turn his head, and…

“See that guy with the dark armor, spikes sword and ugly disposition, sweetie?” said the voice, “that’s what we call a bad guy.”

Jenny froze. Her brain demanded she run, but fear that severed the connection between her wits and her body.

She could barely breathe.

She recognized him as one of the ‘Knights of Honored Scars’. To even be a member, one of the Knights would have to have been scarred in a ‘Cow Uprising’. From there, according to the whispers, they spent two years training to improve their skills, to the point where they were the equal to the mighty Groosalugg.

The Honored Scars prided themselves on deterring cow uprisings as much as they did putting them down, by ending any cow that dared even breathe of freedom as painfully as possible and in front of many people they could find.

“Don’t panic,” said the voice, “and I need you to trust me, honey.”

Jenny just barely managed to nod.

“Then scream, kiddo. As loud as you can.”

Jenny opened her mouth, and squeaked like a mouse. Her throat was gripped in terror, but then the Knight began to turn his head.

“Aaaaaahhhhh!”

The Knight turned towards the screams, his blood lust rising. He relished the power he can began to feel flooding his veins, his ego stoked by the fact that there was a cow terrified enough to scream at the mere sight of him.

And then fell down the ridge, in his euphoria having paid no attention to his footing whatsoever. The steep incline, combined with his fifty pounds of armor, meant he fell like a log, and he came to a stop only five feet from the terrified child, unconscious.

“Wasn’t that awesome?” said the voice.

Jenny looked at the unconscious knight, and then to an apple sized rock that lay in between her and him.

Jenny picked it up, and stomped towards the Knight.

“Whoa whoa there, kiddo!” said the voice, “that’s not something you want to do.”

“Are you going to leave me if I do?” asked Jenny.

“’Fraid not, kiddo. You’re family,” said the voice.

“Then why not?” Jenny growled. She didn’t have to think of a reason to be angry enough to kill, she just struggled to think of a single reason not to be.

“Because he’s not a threat,” said the voice.

“And if I kill him, he never will be.”

“…true,” said the voice, “but before you do, tell me. Are you going to kill him to end a threat, or because you can? Because of how it’ll make you feel? Because you want revenge?”

Jenny felt her back begin to itch, “Doesn’t! Matter!”

“Does to you,” said the voice, “because it’ll be with you your entire life. It will define you, kiddo, long after he’s gone and in ways you could never predict. But it’s your choice.”

Jenny looked at the unconscious knight, and then to the rock she had grasped in her hand.

“Fine,” Jenny took a step back.

“Besides, I can see this guy’s future,” said the voice, “his kids will give him a stroke before the next decade, and…”

Jenny smashed the rock into the Knight’s groin.

 “And apparently they’ll be adopted.”

“Where do I go now?”

It was nearly night before the voice in her head directed Jenny to an empty cave.

Any fears that she might be insane or delusional vanished when Jenny saw what lay inside. The walls had runes scribbled on them, but there was a small pond of fresh drinking water, an already dug fire-pit and glass jars filled with preservatives.

It wasn’t a Hell infested LA, but it was almost as good.

“There’s a spare bedroll up in the corner there,” said the voice.

“Who are you?” Jenny removed the animal skin roll, spread it out on the ground and all but fell forward on it.

“Someone who had to choose between one friend or the world, or all her friends and all the world,” said the voice, “but this is where I get to break even.”

After a day of marching through the wood, Jenny had absolutely nothing left. As much as her mind demanded answers, her body demanded rest. The voice seemed to grow more distant, but she could swear she felt a gentle hand running through her hair. Jenny barely managed to pry her own eyes open before drifting off, to see a beautiful woman kneeling down next to her, with a warm smile and sad eyes.

“It’s safe in here, Jenny. And when it’s not, you will be.”

Jenny fell fast asleep, dreaming of red skies, of the stench of boiling blood and screams carried by the wind. She dreamed of better times.

The next day, the voice was gone. Jenny listened and listened and listened, but all she found was the sounds of the forest and her own voice. 

Alone. Jenny brushed the tear from her eyes as she told herself it was all she had any right to expect anything else from life.

She passed the time by setting the few traps that she knew to string, ate a few of the surviving supplies and studied the cave paintings. They looked to be words of magic, but without knowing what they were intended for Jenny thought it best just to leave them be. For all she knew they might summon a dragon or some other monster.

With so little to do, Jenny managed to find enjoyment, peace, in absolutely nothing at all.

And she wondered, was this considered freedom? She didn’t exactly hate it, but it didn’t feel like she expected it to.

But it wasn’t bad either.

 


	4. Found

oooOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Jenny was wrenched into the waking world when she felt someone grab her by the hair, and began dragging her towards the mouth of the cave.

Her first thought was that she’d been grabbed by a wild animal, a roving D’arkuur or Drokken beast that decided she was worth a nimble or had claimed the cave as its own.

But then Jenny felt the cold, hard calloused handed around her skull, heard a huff of contempt and then just wished it was a wild animal that had her.

Jenny thrashed wildly. She dragged her hands through the dirt, tearing her nails off just trying to slow the Knight down. She kicked and bucked and screamed but her captor didn’t even flinch.

“Stupid half cow,” chuckled the red, lizard skinned Honored Scar knight. He dragged Jenny by the roots of her hair out of the cave and into the harsh morning light, “you stumble upon a fully stocked cave and stay? Set traps to let me know you’re nearby? Even animals know the best pest traps have bait.”

She lied.

The thought was like a lightning bolt through Jenny’s brain. The voice lied. It…she didn’t care about her. Jenny remembered once seeing a cat, playing with a small mouse. The cat would chase the tiny thing into a corner, and then stand just far enough away so that the mouse thought it could still slip away.

Jenny realized that her entire life was like that of the mouse. She was just a pathetic plaything for the true masters. Falling into hell, meeting Lorne and Angel, then being flushed back home and into the hands of the enemy to die?

She was nothing more than some cosmic joke.

“We missed the cow that lived there first,” the Knight threw Jenny on her back, and then bent down and pressed his knee on her stomach. Barely able to breath, Jenny could offer no resistance as the Knight took her hands, and bound them with rope, “we’ve caught a few since then, though. You’re certainly no smarter than a cow. Hell, you’re less than demon and cow from the looks of you.”

Hands bound, Jenny could do nothing but cry. The Knight then threw her over his shoulder like she was a Persian Carpet.

Jenny didn’t remember much of the ride. There was a horse, some racial slurs and then they came upon a camp of two dozen other Knights.

Jenny had held some small spark of hope to escape this single Knight. When she saw the rest, it died a cold and lonely death.

Jenny was thrown down in the center of the camp, and almost immediately the Knights swarmed, like sharks to blood.

“Too small! She’ll barely last an hour!”

“A half cow? Barely worth the effort.”

“Can’t she even scream?”

Jenny cowered, head in hands as the Knights of the camp strolled by, all eager to see the first real catch in months. They loomed over the little girl, and every single one reveled in the sheer power they held over her. Just a glance was intoxicating to them.

“She might be a good warm up,” Jenny watched as the Knights parted as one. Jenny didn’t know the rank, but she watched as a blue skinned, horned demon knelt, bent down and cupped her chin. He examined her face carefully, “you are going to help your pathetic kind, child. You are going to be an example, in front of the entire kingdom, of what happens when a cow wanders off. What do you say about that?”

Jenny looked at the man’s feet, then brought her head up and spit in his eye.

“Still prettier than you,” Jenny managed to force out.

She expected the kick. His foot seemed to smash across her stomach, and she saw stars and threw up all over herself gasping for breath. She lay on her stomach, barely able to move. But her plan worked.

“Stupid, pathetic cow!” snarled the Knight as he looked down at her, while Jenny cradled the small hunting knife she’d liberated from his boot, “you think you’re clever! That you could provoke me into killing you! You’re not the first to try!”

“And if you don’t step away right now, I promise you, she’ll be the last.”

Jenny recognized the voice, but her heart refused to accept it.

“Angel…”

The Souled Vampire came up from behind the Knights, and stood a dozen feet away, axe in one hand. Jenny saw how Angel tightened and flexed his other hand, covered in a spider’s web of black veins.

“Excuse me?” said the Captain, “do you know to whom you speak? I am a Captain of the Honored Scars! By what right does a pathetic cow like you think to threaten me? This waste of meat belongs to me!”

“She belongs to no one,” said Angel, “but she belongs _with_ her family, which is me and mine. Hand her over, and I won’t do what I really, really want to do to you.”

“You should be more respectful, filth.”

“Sorry, if I seem disrespectful, it’s just because I don’t respect you.”

The Captain’s chest tightened, and then he snarled, “I will never surrender my prey, and if you think…”

The Captain intended to say more, but struggled to speak when Angel’s axe crashed into his skull with such force that he was thrown a good five feet back.

The Scarred Knights were stunned by the sudden, abrupt death of their leader. But then, instinct took over, swords were in hand and soon Angel was facing down many, many pointy things.

“Sorry, I was ready to suffer through his stupid ranting, I really was,” said Angel, “but then I remembered that he kicked a little girl. So, anyone who doesn’t run away, right now, doesn’t walk away, at all.”

“You’re outnumbered.”

“You’re outclassed.”

“Cocky fool!”

“Dragonfoodsayswhat?”

“What?”

The sky fell.

That was the first thought that went through Jenny’s mind as something impossibly large and hot and angry landed around her like a giant cage.

The dragon Cordelia landed like a meteor, and swept aside soldiers with dismissive ease. With a flap of its wings, a dozen Knights were thrown back. A swipe of its tail dispatched even more, and once the Knights saw what they faced, a wave of terror overtook them all.

Jenny somehow kept enough presence of mind to use her stolen knife to cut through the ropes binding her wrist, and scrambled out from the dragon, and into the middle of a warzone.

Faith. Connor. Spike. Kate Lockley. The Groosalugg. Willow Rosenberg.

Those were the big names that Jenny would remember years later. The squad of Slayers not so much, but they tore through the ‘Honored Scars’ just as easily as everyone else. They were like a tsunami, crashing upon the Knights with the strength of nature and power of moral outrage.

“Hey there, sweetie, you can’t go running off.”

Jenny heard the voice just…appear behind her, and felt a gentle hand on her shoulder.

Panicked instinct took over and the young girl slashed out with her stolen knife.

 Jenny hit flesh, but didn’t stick around long enough to see what she’d hit, let alone whom. Jenny could already hear the battle winding down, and knew that this massive force would likely turn on her next.

Her first instinct was to flee, but her chest ached from where she’d been kicked, she could barely take a full breath and she’d vomited up what little food she had managed to eat. With no fuel in the tank, all she could do was stay close and maybe…

Well, Jenny had no idea what she’d do. She couldn’t run, couldn’t fight, the best she could maybe do was hide and listen. Jenny spotted some bushes in the distance, and scrambled into them like they were a security blanket.

“Everyone accounted for? Connor? Kate?”

“I’m good, dad.”

“Same. The movies were right, boom stick does beat primitive screw-heads.”

“I’m good too.”

“Didn’t ask, Spike.

“Right. So, anyone remember the little bird we’re supposed to find?”      

“I’m tempted to leave her here, she cut me in the boob!”

“I admire her ability to hit such a small target.”

“Spike! Not funny! And they’re not small!”

“Everyone just take a breath. She’s nearby, according to the artifact.”

Jenny wrinkled her nose. Artifact? They had magic? Could this get any worse?

“I’ll find her, dad.”

Connor’s eyes scanned the battlefield, starting where he’d last seen the young girl and with casual ease he turned his head towards the bushes where Jenny hid, and his eyes became level with hers.

Jenny scrambled backwards out of the bushes like a startled animal. She broke into a dead run when she heard the crunching of leaves behind her, eyes darting back and forth for some sort of refuge.

Jenny spotted a hollowed out tree stump, and thought her prayers had been answered.

She just barely squeezed through the opening, and turned around, facing the entrance. Gripping the knife, and shivering for no shortage of reasons, Jenny prepared to make her last stand.

“She’s in there.”

“Ya think?”

“Jenny?” She recognized the voice as Angel, “we’re not here to hurt you. Could you please come out?”

“Go away!” Jenny screamed.

“I could just magic her out of there, ya know. Pop! Like a wet bar of soap, no fuss no muss.”

Jenny held her breath, and decided that she truly hated magic.

“I’d rather not have her start her new life by being kidnapped,” said Angel.

“Well, we aren’t leaving her here after all that bloody hard work, either!”

“Give me a moment alone with her, Dad. I’ll see if I can reach her.”

“Connor?”

“Just trust me. Faith, maybe you can stick around too.”

Jenny heard the people marching off, and breathed a sigh of relief. She could tell that two people had stayed, but it was still better odds than a few moments ago.

“Jenny? I’m Connor, and I just want to talk, okay?”

“Go! Away!”

Jenny felt Connor sitting down on the opposite side of the trunk, casually ignoring her request.

“Why?” said Connor, “do you really want to stay here? I haven’t been here long, but the stories I’ve heard make this place sound like no fun at all.”

Jenny swallowed, her throat burning dry. She knew what would happen if she got her wish, if they listened to her and just left and went back to their world. But the pain she felt burning in her chest grabbed her like a vice. She felt like she was being torn in two, and no matter what choice she made would just mean more suffering.

“Yes!” Jenny said unconvincingly.

“Before we leave, could you tell us why you don’t want to leave?”

Jenny was silent.

“Please? We’ve come an awful long way. The least we deserve is an explanation.”

“…he lied,” Jenny growled.

“Who?”

“Angel! He said he was real and I was safe, that he cared and he lied!” Jenny screamed with the pure rage and anger only a child could feel. Just the pain of thinking about it hurt worse than the whips.

“Ah,” Connor sighed, “I don’t think that’s it.”

“Shut up!”

“Can I tell you something about myself, Jenny?” Connor said, “I grew up in a bad place like this. Tough, always fighting for survival. Living with only one person looking out for you, who cares and sometimes not even that. I know what it does to you. Same with Faith here. We only had childhoods in the technical sense. 

“See, Angel? I think he did hurt you. Deeply. He never meant to, but he hurt you worse than anyone before. Am I right?”

Jenny nodded, though Connor couldn’t see it.

“I know because he did the same to me and Faith. People like us, we build a wall around our hearts without even realizing it. We build it out of our pain and suffering, and after living with it for so long, we just get used to it. We don’t even notice it pain after a while, not until anything but suffering, like actually feeling happy, like hope, is what really makes us hurt.

And then Angel comes along. And he looks at you, he looks through you, through everything you’ve done and decides that you’re worth it. After struggling every day to convince yourself that you have worth, that you matter, he just glances at you and decides you’re worth something. That you have value as a person, and worth fighting for. So you let your guard down.”

Jenny shook her head, and wiped away tears. But her throat was too dry to even speak.

“But all the hate, all that anger has to go somewhere. Because when he fails, and he’s not perfect and he will fail, you lash out. All that pain comes rushing back, and you think rejecting the person who gave you all that hope will somehow make it stop. That by rejecting him, you can deny everything good he makes you see in yourself.”

Faith examined her nails, and tried not to think on her own past. While she would forever be in Angel’s debt, she never much cared to really reflect on why she was so damn intent on hurting one of the only people who actually believed in her.

“I’ve been where you are, Jenny. Believe me when I say it gets better. Angel may not be perfect, but he will always come for you. He will always try to protect you. And he will always care about you. And he won’t be the only one.”

Connor waited, and prayed that he got through.

“That was pretty sweet,” Faith said, finally.

“Tell him I said that and we’ll have words.”

“Almost went into testosterone withdraw there, huh?”

Connor waved his hand dismissively, “Think I made it through?”

“You aimed a little high. Let me give it a shot,” Faith said. She went to the front of the stump, and knelt down until she was eye to eye with the sobbing girl.

“Hey, little green, name’s Faith. Don’t suppose you want to come out here, do you?”

Jenny shook her head defiantly.

“Didn’t think so,” Faith sighed, “I’ve been in the same position as you. Well, not hiding in a stump, but, ya know. Alone, hunted, and surrounded by a world I thought hated me. And then, out of nowhere, like a bolt of lightning, you find people who are willing to fight for you, to die for you. People you barely know, and who barely know you, and are willing to do anything for you. To fight for you, to die for you.

“But all you can think of is if they knew, if they just _knew_ what you had to do to survive, to live one more day, then they’d turn on you. They wouldn’t understand, not even try, just judge you, then throw you away like trash.”

Faith reached her hand out to the trembling child.

“Well, you’re wrong. We want ya, Jenny, horns and all. And whatever you’ve had to do, whatever you’ve done to survive, there is nothing that will change that, nothing Angel cannot help you come back from. And we will do everything in our power to make sure you never have to do it again.”

Jenny set down the dagger, and took Faith’s hand.

“Well hello there Jenny,” Faith looked the quivering girl, absolutely filthy, covered in sweat, vomit, snot and dirt while shaking like a leaf. Acting on instincts she didn’t even know she had, Faith scooped Jenny up into her arms and into a hug, “today’s the first day of the bestening of your life.”

“Bestening?” Connor gave Faith a curious look.

“Hey, every word starts somewhere.”

Jenny buried her face in Faith’s shoulder, still weeping. The Slayer suspected that even though Jenny had managed to reach out to her, she was still terrified of what was going to happen next. The line between hope and despair was a thin one, like a terrifying high wire act.

Connor was absolutely right. Sometimes hope was a fuel for terror.

Faith rubbed Jenny’s back gently, like one might do with a baby. Faith knew it was a little silly, but she suspected Jenny wouldn’t complain about some basic human contact.

What Faith didn’t expect was the mass of scars that made it feel like she was running her hand over old torn leather, or to feel the young girl whimper. Faith moved her hand like she’d just touched an oven eye, and tensed for Jenny’s reaction.

But nothing came. The girl still had her head buried in her chest, but she actually seemed to be calming down some.

“Hey guys!” Connor called out as they rejoined the others, “look who we found!”

“Well hey alright! Baby boy isn’t so useless after all!”

Spike began clapping, followed by Angel, Groo and Kate. Jenny lifted her head off of Faith’s head, and saw how her team of rescuers were divided into two groups. Angel’s group was genuinely smiling, while the second group, made up entirely of females, seemed to just be going along with the clapping almost mechanically.

Angel took a step towards Faith and Jenny, but the Slayer gave him a slight shake of the head, with a little ‘not yet’ look.

“Good job, son,” Angel gave Connor a slap on the back, “how’d you do it?”

“I just told her what a big dork you were,” Connor shrugged, “she just had to see it for herself.”

“Well, now that we’re a big happy family again, how about we head home?” Willow suggested.

“Hey Red, how about you give little green a once over before we leave?” Faith put Jenny down, but the girl still clung to her hand like it was a life raft. Faith squeezed back, but held firm in a way that made it clear she wasn’t about to let Jenny run.

Jenny didn’t possess the refined magical senses that her full demon blooded kin possessed, but she was still able to perceive magic on a conscious but instinctive level.

And to her, Willow was like a nuclear reactor of magic. And with each step the young woman took, the power that rolled off her in waves seemed to double.

“I’m sorry,” Jenny said submissively, “this cow never meant…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Willow said with a warm smile that Jenny could literally feel wash over her, “I figure I owed you one anyway. If I’d been faster getting us into position, that mean man wouldn’t have hurt you.”

Jenny didn’t quite accept the logic, but she nodded anyway.

“Lets give you a little magic make-over, okay? Lets start with the easy stuff first, kiddo. You could use a facial.”

Willow tapped Jenny on the head, and all the dirt, vomit and sweat fell from her as if it was a second skin. She looked down at her dress, the one that she liked, one of the few decorative things in her life that was meant for her, and saw that it was as good as new.

“Can I see your hands?”

Jenny hesitated, but she let go of Faith and held her hands out, and for the first time saw just how damaged they’d become. Her wrists were raw and bruised from where they’d been bound, her nails were just gone, replaced by blood and dirt while there were countless scratches all over her hands and fingers.

The young girl was actually surprised by the condition of her hands, and when she thought about, just how much they hurt. 

“This will tickle a little,” Willow held her hands over Jenny’s.

Faith watched as the blood and dirt removed itself from Jenny’s hands, her cuts and scratches changed from jagged flesh to smooth skin and her nails returned to the tips of her fingers flawlessly. Even Jenny’s rough and calloused hands became the soft skin it should have always been.

Faith smirked. Willow had been the Slayer Army’s self appointed cleric (such a _nerd_ ) for so long that this simple act of healing took no more effort than crossing the street, but to Jenny it might as well be a Christmas miracle, and no doubt would go a long way to earning her trust.

“Better?”

The young girl nodded, numb with shock. Her hands were in such good condition that she literally barely recognized them as hers.

“Lets take a look at those ribs, okay?”

Jenny held her breath as she felt the energy flowing over her lower body, and when she breathed out it seemed to dispel all the aches and pain.

“Better?”

Jenny threw her arms around Willow and wept tears of joy.

“Umm, a yes would have sufficed,” Willow was about to return the hug, when Faith grabbed her wrist.

“That was just the warm up,” said Faith.

“Something wrong?” Angel asked.

“We just got one last thing to address,” Faith nodded towards Jenny’s back, littered in scars, “then we can get back to LA.”

“I…” Willow could only see the top half of the scars, but that was still enough to make her sick, “I need a little privacy to do this.”

Faith found them a stump, and sat Jenny down. The little girl trembled, but was as quite as a church mouse.

“We’re almost done,” Faith brushed the hair out of Jenny’s face. Her horns worked well in place of hairclips, Faith decided.

“Okay. Jenny, I’m going to take a quick look before I get started,” Willow unzipped the back of Jenny’s dress, and only avoided throwing up because it might have upset the little girl she was supposed to be helping.

Angel had told warned her, but there were really no words that could have truly prepared Willow for what she found. To describe Jenny’s back as scarred would be like describing the Atlantic Ocean as a body of water.

Jenny’s back looked like a lunar landscape after someone used it as a drag strip. There were long longs crisscrossing Jenny’s back, and more than a few overlapped. Laying over them were what could only be described as craters, spots were the open wounds had become infected, requiring the boils to be lanced and drained.

“Why …how could anyone do this to a child…?” Willow couldn’t help but ask aloud.

“The shock collars become unreliable if a pyrite rock is placed in between the collar and receiver gem,” Jenny said, “or so I heard. The whip is seen as a better deterrent, cheap and more cost effective. It’s smart.”

“That’s one word for it,” Willow chewed her lip, “okay Jenny, this may feel a little weird, but once I start it will be better if I finish.”

“You just squeeze my hand if it hurts,” said Faith.

Willow summoned her magic, and began focusing the energy through her hands and into Jenny’s back. Though she had no shortage of experience when it came to stitching up wounds, removing and healing scar tissue was another matter entirely. This wasn’t flesh that needed to be mended and restored, but removed entirely.

Willow infused Jenny’s back with magic until it was as pliable as clay to her, and then went about her work. She smoothed the rough skin back into Jenny’s body, while reconnecting nerves that had been severed. The work was more precise than most surgeries, but to Willow the act of healing was intuitive, second nature by now. She was in the zone.

-plink!-

“Ahhh!” Jenny cried out.

“Kid? You okay?” Faith looked at Jenny, then to Willow. The Jewish witch slowly withdrew her magic, taking care not to do more damage.

“It…hurt,” Jenny looked at Faith, completely dumbfounded.

“I’m sorry sweetie,” said Willow, “I didn’t mean to, but…”

“No, it hurt before, and now it doesn’t,” Jenny blinked back tears, “it hurt so much and I just got used to it and I _barely even noticed_. How…?”

Willow glanced down at the ground, and saw a sharp, ebony object that had not been there before. She picked up what looked like a shark’s tooth, but jagged and serrated.

“Where the hell did that come from?” Faith felt her stomach churn.

“…if I had to guess, Jenny’s owners weren’t satisfied with a regular whip, and some bits got caught in…,”

Willow couldn’t bring herself to finish her sentence.

“I’m sorry,” said Jenny, though she wasn’t certain why. All she knew were two authority figures standing next to her were angry because of her, so logically it meant she was in the wrong.

“You ain’t got nothing to be sorry for,” said Faith, “and she ain’t got no owners, Red. Finish the hell up, and lets get the hell out of here before I decide to burn everything that isn’t us.”

Willow nodded, “I could not agree more, Faith. Okay Jenny, just sit still, and I’ll have you like new in a few minutes.”

Jenny nodded, unable to believe what was happening. As Willow continued her work, and as she went about repairing the torn flesh, she saw three more sharps things that had no place in a little girl’s flesh fall to the ground. Seeing that disgusting sight actually helped Willow keep her focus, and Jenny felt the pain that she’d just grown accustomed to just evaporate like it had never been, and in its place she felt a tingling, static feeling that was soon replaced with almost nothing at all.

Her back had been a map of pain and scar tissue for so long, Jenny didn’t even recognize how it was supposed to feel otherwise.

“Okay, done,” Willow wiped the sweat from her brow. She’d never tried something as complicated as this before, but the results seemed to speak for themselves.

“Can you feel this?” Willow slowly traced her finger down Jenny’s back.

“…yes,” Jenny said in disbelief, “how?”

“Magic.”

Jenny wiped the tears from her eyes. She loved magic now.

“I..I don’t know how to repay this, I…”

“Are you thankful?” Willow stood up and ruffled Jenny’s hair.

“Yes!”

“Then you’ve repaid me.”

Jenny looked dumbstruck, “That’s not a fair exchange of energy and effort for such a major…”

“Is for me. Ready to go?” Willow offered Jenny her hand. The young hybrid, still baffled by the act of compassion, took it eagerly.

The Slayer and the Witch led the little girl back to the rest of their party, and for the first time Jenny realized the enormity of the group that had come for her. The half dozen Slayers, Angel, Spike, Connor and all the rest. Armed, courageous and all intent on rescuing her.

“Okay travelers, hope you visited the souvenir shop,” Willow was beyond exhausted, but opening a portal to earth was like crossing the street, “because next stop, earth!”

Faith led Jenny through first, and the rest of the warriors filed behind them single file. Within minutes it was only Willow and Angel who remained.

“Hey, where’d Fabio go?”

“Groo decided to stick around. Something about Knights hunting down mixed bloods gets under his skin, which is good because do you know how expensive dragon food is?”

A pause.

“Angel? Not a taxi here,” said Willow.

“Sorry, just thinking.”

“What about?”

The two stepped through the portal.

“About how all this was just the easy part.”


	5. Custody

Custody

 “You can go to sleep in a moment, Jenny,” said Willow. She concentrated, and formed an emerald orb in her hand.

Jenny felt her eyes drawn to it, and her mind began to fog.

“She won’t remember anything?” asked Kate. She had her eyes clenched shut, as suggested by Willow.

“Nothing and everything,” Willow said, “the spell unlocks her memory, but she won’t recall anything she said. You can open your eyes now.”

“Magic…” Kate couldn’t keep herself from glancing the sphere, and then to Jenny, her eyes glazed over, “half the time I hate it, half the time I’d kill to have had it during an investigation. And I’m honestly not sure which it is, this time. Usually, something like this is done slowly, and for damn good reason.”

“She won’t remember, I’m on a clock and it’d take more time than I have to get this information otherwise,” said Willow.

“Alright,” Kate took a breath, “Jenny, please tell me about Pylea.”

_Later_

Kate and Willow felt the nervous energy as they came down into the lobby.

Lorne had a drink in hand, Spike and Faith were exchanging war stories, while Willow’s bodyguard, Satsu sat in a far corner lotus style. Angel paced the lobby, only coming to a stop when he saw the two women coming down the stairs. Everyone else, from the rest of the Slayer Squad and Conner, had likely gone out for a bite to eat or just out.

“So what’s the word, Red?”

“Well,” Willow glanced aside. She was used to delivering good new, and she had handled bad news. She just wasn’t exactly sure where this fell, “there’s some good news, and then…other kind of news.”

“Just come out and say it,” said Angel.

“Well, she wasn’t sexually abused at all,” Willow said.

“That’s…something,” Angel said flatly.

“Well, we only know that because she witnessed it happen to other slaves. And uh, she knows how she was conceived. Fred never said anything, but because apparently being a slave doesn’t mean you can’t be an asshole,” Willow said, “long, traumatic story short, she’s been victimized in ways we can barely understand, used to being beaten for imagined offenses,  she’s probably suffering post traumatic stress, her ability to form emotional bonds is likely crippled at best, she has no ability to defy authority figures in any meaningful way, and uhh…you’re relying on magic, a Sunnydale graduate and ex-cop for an expert mental evaluation.”

“Well, for what it’s worth, none of that comes as a surprise,” Angel nodded.

Willow took a deep breath, “I didn’t think so. Look, Angel…”

“No, not happening. Not under any circumstances,” Angel growled in a soft tone that drew everyone’s attention.

“I think she should come with us,” Willow finished.

“Whoa, hold up there!” Lorne shot up like a bullet, “England? I mean, it’s great for the horses, but not a little girl! We’re family!”

“Lorne’s right,” Angel said, “that little girl is part of our family, our responsibility and we’re not about to ship her off to live with strangers!”

“You’re just as much strangers to her as we are,” Willow observed.

“I’m not!” Lorne said defensively, “heck, I took that girl away from her masters and gave her her own room!”

“And she’s still scared of you,” said Willow with a heavy heart, “you’re green, and you have authority. She doesn’t see much difference between you and her old masters. And that’s less racism and more a hard wired survival mechanism, really.”

“Oh.”

Angel tried not to see the crushed look in Lorne’s face.

“Look, that doesn’t matter. Fred was one of us,” Angel said, “what would you do if you found out Xander had a kid? Buffy? Would you let someone else raise them?”

“Hey, spoiler alert,” Spike raised his hand, “you guys didn’t. Dawn, remember?”

“Hey, not to interrupt what’s got to be the oddest custody battle this side of a soap opera,” Faith said, “but what about Fred’s parents? They’re her blood, right?”

“She’s lime green,” Angel said, “with horns. No offense Lorne…”

“None taken.”

“…but her parents might not react well.”

“They lost their daughter,” Faith said, “I think they’d be overjoyed to have some small part of her, ya know. And Jesus, why am I the optimist in this whole situation?”

Spike, Angel and Lorne exchanged a guilty glance that no one missed.

“Fred’s parents,” Angel took a moment to force the words from his mouth, “they don’t know she’s dead.”

“What…?” Faith slapped her forehead in disbelief, “who are you and what have you done with Angel?”

“They’re…normal people,” Angel explained, “good, _normal_ people. And yes, I should have told them! And I will, once I find a good way to explain how she was killed, how she’s dead but her body is still walking around occupied by something else.”

“I can’t believe you!” Willow snapped, “they’re her parents! They have a right to know!”

“They do, but don’t you go throwing stones,” Spike strolled across the lobby to Willow, until they were only a foot apart, “I remember you, Xander and Tara covering up Buffy’s death for all official purposes. You remember that, hmm?”

“Spike, that was different and you know it!”

“Why? Because it’s you?” Angel said, “look, I appreciate your concern, I do, but you won’t change my mind. She belongs here, with her family. End of discussion.”

“What family?” said Willow, “Wesley and Fred dead! Your friend Gunn is in a coma! Your demi-goddess is wearing the body of Jenny’s mother and I don’t think you want her around!”

“I’ve got Kate, Lorne, Connor and Spike,” Angel said, “it’s not like I need to take out an ad in the classified. And, strange thing, I don’t see you offering to help.”

Willow said nothing.

“That’s what it boils down to, isn’t it? You don’t trust me. You don’t trust us.”

Satsu rose from her lotus position silently.

“You took over the most evil law firm on the planet,” Willow said softly, “so yes, I have doubts. We…have doubts.”

“I did it for the sake of the world,” Angel snarled, “and do you know what I did? I managed to kill the greatest collection of evil on the planet all in one night. I broke their power in this world. You should be God damn thanking me!”

“And they took LA to hell because of it!” Willow replied, “an entire city and everyone in it, millions of people, to hell itself! What do you think they’d do to a little girl? Angel…I know what happened to Connor, I don’t want that to happen again!”

“Don’t you dare,” Angel was an inch from Willow’s face before she could take another breath, “don’t you dare use my son against me like that!”

Satsu was about to move, when Faith lightly touched her shoulder.

“Angel, take a deep breath, or however you calm the hell down, and step back,” Faith said, “now, please.”

“Sorry,” Angel said with mock sincerity.

“I’m just trying to think about that girl upstairs!” Willow said, “what are you going to tell her when she asks why her mother never came for her? When she asks who that person is, walking around in her mother’s body?”

Lorne shook his head, while Spike clenched his fists. Angel, however, did nothing to disguise his anger.

“And what will you tell her?” Angel growled, “you didn’t know Fred, not like us. She was family, and so is Jenny. We loved her, just like you love Buffy, just like you love Dawn.”

“I know, but we have people, an organization…”

“Really? Good for you. So how’s Dana then?”

“Dana?”

“Insane Slayer, chopped off Spike’s hands,” Angel explained.

“Little like Drusilla, but not as much fun at parties or decent conversation,” Spike offered, “don’t tell me you have so many wacko Slayers you forget one, eh?”

“Your boy Andrew picked her up, and was kind enough to leave a veiled threat. Ringing a bell now?” said Angel.

“She’s…a work in progress,” said Willow.

“Oh good, so Jenny has to get in line behind her for help,” Spike said, “bullocks to that!”

“Okay, I think we’re careening towards the point of pointlessness,” Faith rubbed her eyes, “this isn’t a getting us anywhere. So lets try something else.”

Faith grabbed Angel and Willow by the collar, and shoved them both out the door.

“This ain’t a public debate, it’s a little girl’s future,” growled Faith, “don’t come back inside until you reach a decision like mature God damn adults.”

Faith slammed the door in their face, and felt the eyes of everyone come to rest on her.

“What? I hate it when Mommy and Daddy fight.”

oooOOooo

“She’s right,” sighed Angel, “this isn’t about us.”

“But here we are, making decisions we have no right to make,” Willow said, “remember when we used to steal military supplies and build giant bombs to kill demons? What happened to that? I miss that.”

“Yeah, good times. These days they call it terrorism.”

“Yeah. Though it was disturbingly easy to make…”

“Willow, before we continue…I mean, I have to ask…” Angel shook his head, trying to assemble the right words in his head, “about Fred…”

 “You’ve been wanting to ask it for days now,” said Willow, “we’re in private. No one can hear us, trust me. So go ahead.”

“Willow…”

“We’ve tried moral arguments, lets see where brutal honesty gets us.”

“We called you looking for help, when Fred was first infected,” Angel said, “Giles said you were on the astral plane. Was that true?”

“No,” Willow replied, “I was in another dimension, and Giles was in a hurry organizing a rescue. A squad had been lured there to get me away from Buffy. Evil vampire wizard, long story. We’d never abandon you, even if we didn’t trust you. Your turn.”  

“Truth? I’m terrified,” Angel said, “I know how dangerous my life is. I collect enemies like some people collect stamps. You say you know what happened to Connor? Well, I lived it. And it nearly destroyed me. And if I could think of a better solution for Jenny, I’d do it in a heartbeat.”

“Then why won’t you let her come with us?” Willow’s voice was just short of begging, “I didn’t know Fred like you did, I know that, but I did know her. She was cute and nice and funny and so I don’t want to feel like I’m leaving her daughter on an artillery range surrounded by a minefield!”

“She’s in danger no matter where she is because of who she is,” Angel replied.

“We can protect her!” Willow said “I’ve saved the world a few times too!”

“Not like us,” said Angel, “brutal truth, we failed to save her mother. We failed Fred, and there’s no getting around that. It’s something we still feel today, and will feel for the rest of our lives no matter how long we live. And because of that, we will fight harder than anyone else on the face of the planet to protect her.”

“I know that, but…” Willow sighed, “fine, brutal truth, Xander, Dawn, Buffy, I don’t love them like family. Everything we’ve been through, family just isn’t an adequate word. I could never trust my mother to do for me what Buffy and the rest of the gang do for me every day. I…I can barely talk to her these days.”

“I’m sorry…”

“But my mom’s still family. That little girl though, she needs family. Not a band of warriors, but family, and no matter what we tell ourselves, that’s not what we are to one another.”

“Like you said, we’re more,” Angel replied, “tell me, when you took in Dawn, was it solely because you saw her as family, or because you were afraid some dumb ass demon or pathetic vampire would come after her, for being the Slayer’s sister? Because you had to protect her?”

“…yes.”

“I know what you’re afraid of, Willow. But I’m not about to pretend that I’m Adam West, or Val Kilmer and she’s my Robin.”

“Adam West? Really?”

Angel rubbed the bridge of his nose, “My point is, I swear that I will do everything I can to build a wall between the good that I do, and the life I intend to give her. And yes, that wall will be torn down, I can’t stop that but I’ll build it back up each and every single time.”

“Angel, I don’t doubt that, but…”

“And I know what I’ll tell her when she asks why Fred didn’t come for her,” Angel continued, “because losing a child is like a disease, it creeps into every part of you and eats away at everything that makes you you. It breaks you down worse than any pain, little by little. And that after only a few days, you consider doing anything to make that pain go away and damn the consequences.”

“Angel…” Willow gently took her friend’s cold hand, offering what little comfort she could.

“That little girl is my priority now. I thought that was clear when I specifically asked that Buffy not be made a part of the rescue mission.”

“It was,” said Willow, “but I don’t think you really understand her circumstances. She’s smart, hell, she’s brilliant, but she isn’t Fred. She can use complete sentences and proper grammar and she might talk like an adult but emotionally she is a _child_ who’s suffered in ways not even Angelus could imagine. And you’re going to have to shoulder it all.”

“I know,” said Angel, “but I’ve bared the weight of the world on my shoulder for strangers. How can I not do the same for Fred?”

Willow sighed, “Then all I can really do is wish you luck.”

“Should we go inside and spread the good news?”

Angel made a polite, ‘ladies first’ gesture.

“So what’s the verdict, Angel Face?”

Angel glanced at Willow, then to his friend.

“We agreed that it would be best if Jenny stays with us.”

“Bloody right,” Spike muttered.

“Well, lets hear it for illegally harboring a minor,” Kate said with a quick roll of her eyes.

“Hey, if that’s the worse felony that’s committed around here, consider yourself lucky,” Faith observed, “so we’re all agreed then, one big happy family?”

“Lets hope,” said Angel.

“Got room in this pad for one more?”

“Uhh, what?”

“Red’s right, you guys need some extra muscle, preferably some that won’t burst into flame ‘cause of daylight,” Faith said, “plus, I’m getting kinda tired of all the other slayers cramping my style. So I’m willing to help out around here, if you want me.”

“You’re always welcome here,” Angel said.

“Faith, a moment?”

Willow and Faith drew in close, and in a hushed tone, Willow said, “What are you doing?”

 “Yeah, I know this is sudden, Red, but I think I ought to stick around,” Faith said, “you guys got enough muscle without me, no worries.”

“Faith, I don’t think you understand,” said Willow, “if you stick around, then, in good conscience, you will have to _stick around_.”

“A kid’s like a chia pet, right?” Faith shrugged, “a little food, a little water, and she’ll be fine.”

“Faith…”

“Okay, this is bullshit,” Faith crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Willow, “look, I’m tired of being the team pit bull, and I’m sure you can find another alpha bitch. And while you are probably a million times smarter than me, and all I got to my education is a prison GED, but don’t think you know better about screwed up kids than me, Will.” 

“Fine, fine,” Willow shook her head and stepped away. The more complicated the situation got, the more she just wanted to be done with it. It was a little selfish, she knew that, but she did her best. That had to count for something, right?

“Now, how about we let the kid know what’s going on?” suggested Faith.

“She’s sleeping,” Willow said.

“It’s like, seven,” Faith said, “

“She had a long day,” Angel said.

“Yeah, take my word on this Angel, ‘I want to go to bed’ is kid code for hiding,” Faith said, “but hey, what do I know? You guys are right, lets let the kid go to sleep wondering exactly is goin’ on around her. That’ll make for a great night.”

Willow and Angel exchanged an awkward glance at one another.

“She’s like an annoying broken clock,” said Willow, “though, actually, I think all broken clocks are annoying.”

“She’s right,” Angel turned to Lorne, “were you able to get it?”

“Angel, I’m offended! I just had trouble finding the right one,” Lorne said with mock hurt. He went to Angel’s office, and returned with a small, gift wrapped box. He handed it to Angel, but kept his grip for a moment.

“Angel,” Lorne leaned in close, very conscious of the eyes on them, “are you sure about this? You’re sailing into uncharted territories here.”

Angel yanked the box from Lorne’s grip, “I’m sure.”

“Angel? One last thing?” said Faith, “the sprout’s a little mad at you right now. I know it’s stupid kid logic, but just take it, okay?”

“Faith…”

“Just trust me on this, okay? Take it, and she moves on. That’s what we gotta focus on.”

“I’d take her word for it, mate,” Spike offered, “she’s the bloody foster care whisperer, seems like.”

“Bite me, Billy Idol,” Faith gave Spike a one finger salute, “and good luck.”

oooOOooo

Willow and Angel stood outside Jenny’s door, looking at the door knob as if it were a branding iron.

“She can’t hear us, right?” Angel whispered.

“Nope. You told me she liked to spy, so I kinda cast a spell so she wouldn’t hear us…”

“Good,” Angel looked at the present in his hand, to the door and then to Willow, “would it be cliché to say that I’d rather fight an army of vampires than open that door?”

“Yes, the cliché of clichés, king of clichés even,” Willow replied, “also, same here.”

“You go first, then.”

“What? You go first!”

“You go, you’re a girl. You can walk in on other girls unannounced, and I can go it with guys. There’s a whole social code thing.”

“I’m a woman!” Willow defended, “and, I hate that you’re right.”

Willow took a breath, and cracked the door open, “Jenny, sweetie? We need to talk.”

Willow heard feet rush across the carpet, the bounce of the box spring and the sound of a blanket being tossed. But rather than calling attention to the obvious subterfuge, Willow opened the door slowly, and waved Angel in.

Jenny pretended to wake up, turn over and gave them her best innocent look.

“Talk about what?” Jenny pretended to rub the sleep from her eyes, and sat up, back up against the headboard and knees drawn to her chest. She gave off a nervous energy that was almost tangible.

“About what happens now,” said Angel.

“You’ll just lie,” Jenny snapped.

“I never meant to lie or hurt you, Jenny. But you’re right, and I’m sorry,” Angel said patiently. He watched as Jenny’s body language shifted, as if someone threw a switch, from angry and defiant to meek and passive. Her head became bowed, and Jenny was unable to meet their eyes.

“…are you my masters now?” Jenny asked.

“You don’t have any masters, not anymore,” said Angel. He knew that Lorne had told her exactly that, but only now did he see how reluctant she was to actually believe it, because Jenny was looking at him like he’d grown another head, “but we will be taking care of you.”

“Angel was friends with your mother,” Willow offered.

“But she’s dead,” Jenny said, so matter of factly it was like a dagger in Angel’s heart. It came as little surprise, the casual acceptance. Fred had likely ‘died’ as far as Jenny was concerned, the day they were separated. But it still hurt and just felt wrong that Jenny was more at peace with Fred’s death than Angel himself felt.

“But we still love her,” Angel said, “and she was never our slave. She was part of our family.”

“Family?” Jenny examined Angel with eyes lit with far too much intelligence and insight.

“Family, to us, is more than just blood,” explained Angel. He handed Jenny the present.

“What’s this?”

“It’s a gift. For you,” said Angel.

Jenny looked at the box, examining it carefully. When she saw the tape at the bottom, and begun to tug at it.

“Here, let me help,” Willow took the box, and tore away at the wrapping paper. Jenny’s eyes went wide at the destruction, but said nothing when she saw Angel’s lack of reaction.

Jenny opened the box, removed a picture frame, and gasped.

It was a picture of Angel Investigations, with Angel, Gunn, Wesley, Lorne and, most importantly, in the center, Fred.

To Jenny, it was like a fog had been lifted from her mind, and a thousand blurry memories of her mother snapped into focus all at once. Tears of joy slid down Jenny’s, and she traced her hand over the picture frame.

“She’s smiling,” Jenny whispered, “she was happy?”

“She was,” Angel said, though he can feel his gut twist. The picture was a gamble, and he wasn’t entirely certain that it paid off just yet.

“She used to be so sick,” Jenny said, never removing her eyes from the picture, “she talked to the crops, she talked about another world called Texas, she gave me her food, and she said kisses make the collar shocks hurt less and it did, and…and she loved me.”   

Angel was glad he no longer had to breathe, as it concealed his sigh of relief.

“There’s something else in there for you.”

With supreme effort, Jenny tore her eyes away from the framed photograph, and saw a golden locket still resting in the box. She carefully set down the picture, and removed the locket. She popped it open, and when she saw what was inside, began to giggle.

“This is mine?”

It was another picture of Fred, and only Fred, smiling with that bright, infectious smile of hers and waving at the camera.

“Of course, sweetie. Here, let me help you with that,” Willow gently took the necklace, and secured it around Jenny’s neck.

The young girl looked as if someone had told her she’d won the lottery. Angel had little doubt that before today, Jenny never even conceived that there’d be a day that she would be given jewelry, let alone wear it herself.

For a brief moment, Jenny felt like royalty.

“I’m not going to be able to stick around,” Willow said, “but I’ll be able to stay in contact, Angel will show you how.”

“Thank you,” Jenny wiped the tears from her face, “both of you. I don’t hurt and I can feel my back and she was happy and I don’t understand why I deserve any of this…”

“You do,” said Angel, “trust us on that, Jenny. You’re family now.”

“Thank you,” Jenny felt her attention drawn to her locket like a magnet, and Willow and Angel suddenly got the impression that they were intruding.

“We’ll…work out the details of everything later,” Angel said. He and Willow quickly excused themselves, and Jenny barely noticed.

“Well,” Angel closed the door, “that went better than we had any right to expect.”

“Well, we do deal with magic and demons,” said Willow, “we had to see a miracle sometime, right?”

oooOOooo

Jenny set the picture frame up on the nightstand, and ran the locket through her hands all night.

Eventually, Jenny Burkle fell asleep, with her mother’s smile warding off all nightmares for the first time in years.

Note:

Just to clarify, this fic will span the entire Angel cast at one point or another. So expect Illryia, Lorne, Wesley and yes, Fred to show up eventually. And the more feedback, the faster they show!


	6. Connor

_Just FYI, this series (obviously) diverges from canon after LA returns to earth, and will go from story to drabble as I want it to. You’ve been warned!_

Connor

Jenny knew everyone thought their big brother was the best, but Jenny was certain hers actually was.

To Jenny, Faith was the wall that protected her, that fought for her. Angel was the guiding hand that led her forward, that explained the unknown and uncertain.

And Connor? He was the steady constant at her side, who just simply _understood_.

He does it without asking a question, without prying and without making Jenny remember what it was like before, surviving a hell dimension.

Connor is the best big brother because he doesn’t bat an eye when she eats bugs. It’s a habit both Faith and Angel try to discourage, but never Connor. He, without judgment, simply tells her which bugs are worth it (cockroaches, ants, grasshoppers, etc), which ones to stay away from (bees, ticks, etc) and which ones taste bad and are just better left alone for their beauty (butterflies, lady bugs, etc).

_Connor is the best big brother, because he understands Jenny and the world at the same time._

Jenny learns this when they’re taking a walk one day, and a shoplifter bursts out of the store and slams into Jenny like a runaway freight train. The man gets up without giving Jenny a second glance, even stepping on her ankle without either noticing or caring.

Connor is at her side in seconds, helped her up, and it’s his firm grip that keeps her from running after the man.

“Stay still,” Connor forced Jenny to sit on a nearby bench, and checked her for injuries.

“Connor, we have to help that man!” Jenny tried to get past Connor.

“Don’t worry, I saw a blue boy tackle him,” Connor replied, with a firm arm keeping her seated, “he’s lucky I didn’t get him first.”

“Connor,” Jenny’s voice was low, mindful of all the people around them. Her voice was laced with fear for the man who’d literally stepped on her, “that man stole food!”

“So?”

“So we have to help him!” Jenny said. She simply could not wrap her head around the idea that anyone would steal food and risk the consequences of getting caught, without good reason.

There’s no confusion on Connor’s face as he shakes his head. There was no real commerce in the Hell dimension that he grew up in, but he still understood how precious food was. It was the most baffling thing to him too, “Don’t worry about it. You watch those cop shows with Faith, right?”

“Yeah.”

“And has anyone ever gotten in major trouble for stealing food in those?”

Jenny rolled her eyes, “Those aren’t realistic! There aren’t any demons or magic or vampires anywhere!”

“…point,” Connor said, “but tell me this, have you ever seen any guards at the grocery store?”

“No.”

“Then I bet you two Snickers that he’s not in major trouble.”

Jenny recognized that mischievous smile on Connor’s face, “No!”

Later, Angel and Kate take her to the precinct, discreetly and Jenny sees that Connor was right. The man was still alive, with all his limbs attached and Jenny finds herself amazed how easily Connor knew the truth.

_Connor was the best big brother because sometimes, he understands when he shouldn’t fight for her._

It happens when they’re in the park one day.  Connor had planned to take his new girlfriend and Jenny out on a picnic. But Becky got called away on a family emergency, so it’s just Connor and Jenny.

And that’s just fine with Connor. They go to the park, have a nice lunch, fly a kite and do all the things Connor remembered families did together (but he never really did himself).

It’s a great day, until Connor hears the rumble of motorcycle engines.

“Hey Jenny, come here a second,” Connor plucked the kite string from Jenny’s hand, and brought the kite in.

And while Connor brought the kite in, he counted the footsteps, and outwardly ignored the approaching wall of muscle.

“Hey!” Connor stiffened, and his lip curled into a snarl when he saw Jenny turn towards the men.

They were three hundred pounds of muscle if they were an ounce, and wore leather cuts and knives on their hips.

“That thing isn’t welcome here.”

“This is a public parks, boys,” Connor said. He didn’t step in front of Jenny, but in his mind’s eye putting Jenny behind him is a foregone conclusion, “so, get lost.”

“You don’t talk to the Knights of Thunder like that, boy.”

“Just did,” Connor observed.

“This park is for humans only.”

“Don’t see a sign,” Connor glanced at Jenny, and saw how her head was cast towards the ground.

Inside, Connor burned. Jenny wasn’t Lorne, able to just ignore the odd glances and curious looks that people cast her way. She was less self conscious about her lime green skin and horns and more about how she stood out in a crowd, and this didn’t help anything.

“There’s a sign now,” said the man in the middle, “right here.”

“You think the three of you walking up together impresses me?” Connor said, “yeah, I hear about you and your motor club when LA went to hell. What you did to the women you ‘rescued’. You’re not the Sons of Anarchy, you’re just idiots with bikes. And you push around people weaker than you, usually demons.”

“Got a big mouth for such a small kid.”

“And you’re such a brave man pushing around a little girl,” said Connor. Connor pointed to the man on the right.

“You drown in your own blood after your ribs puncture your lungs.”

Connor pointed to the man on the left.

“You, I crush your throat and break your knees, so you die in choking agony. Two minutes, tops.”

Connor nodded to the man in the middle.

“You, you get to live. But I’ll put out your eyes, and maybe take an ear as a trophy.”

The three men, no strangers to violence, glanced at one another.

“Well? You guys remember me from Hell A, right? You ever wonder how I was able to save everyone that came to me?”

Connor smiled.

“Because I knew how to take on, and take down anyone or anything.”

Connor could feel the release of adrenaline in his veins. These men were animals, and once they threw the first punch, he’d put them down like such.

“Connor, lets just go,” Jenny said.

Connor looked at Jenny, and studied her face carefully.

“Alright,” Connor sighed, releasing the energy coiled in his body, “congrats boys, this brave little girl saved your butts.”

Connor smiled at Jenny and she smiled back, because she wasn’t afraid. She’d already seen so much violence, so much hate, that she simply couldn’t the idea of causing more for her family. It wasn’t that Jenny didn’t think she was worth defending, it was that she didn’t think anyone deserved to be hurt, if it could be avoided.

Faith would have broken them in half, same with Spike and Gunn. Of her family, Jenny can think of only two people who won’t fight for her when she needs them not to, and she loves that her brother is one of them.

_Connor was the best big brother because he understands how small things can snowball into something worse for no reason at all._

Like when Jenny was experimenting with a tonfa. She had an idea about a spring launched metal spike in the center for a quick distance attack, with the hollow core adding to striking power.

And she almost had it, the wood was hollowed out, the spring inserted and the spike prepped. Pressing it down was a little difficult for the little girl of eight years old, so she had the weapon gripped by a vice, and was pushing the spike into the barrel with a thin pole when it happened.

The sharp, metal spike refused to click, and Jenny was about to ease it out of the barrel when the armory doors swung open.

Angel, Faith and Spike strolled through, back from their latest case.

“I’m just saying, I was the bloody hero there. Why did Angel did the kiss?”

“She was a sixteen year old meth addict,” Angel replied, “are you seriously jealous?”

Startled, Jenny’s grip on the metal cylinder slipped, the string extended and the metal spike she’d been experimenting with flew over her head, across the armory…and sank with irony into a vampire’s posterior.

“Bloody ‘ell…!”

Jenny was mortified, not only because she’d hurt Spike, not just because she wasn’t supposed to be working on weapons unsupervised (she had told Gunn she was going to bed), but because she realized just how stupid she had been.

A metal spike can be rather illuminating in that regard.

But Spike, Angel and Faith, in between fits of honest laughter, assure her that its fine, no major harm was done.

Faith complimented her aim, Spike just shrugged it off with an honest laugh (and slipped her a piece of candy when Angel isn’t looking to show he’s fine), but Angel, when he’s done laughing, knows that she has to be punished.

“No video games for five days,” Angel said. He shoots Spike and Faith a quick glance, that makes it obvious he’ll brook no dissent in this, “you know you’re not supposed to be in here without one of us supervising. We both know you’re smarter than that. You need to act like it.”

“I know,” Jenny said meekly. Angel’s words cut her like a knife, but Jenny couldn’t understand why just then.

“You need to be careful, for your sake as much as anyone else’s. Now go to your room.”

Faith and Spike both give her a playful pat on the head, but neither have the time to discuss anything. They’re working on a case still, and they figure this will keep. Angel doesn’t even bother to take her video games, in part because of the time but also because he trusts her that much.

Jenny doesn’t allow them to see the tears creeping down her face, because the last thing she wants to do is worry them about why she’s crying when she doesn’t really know why herself.

It isn’t the video games. Jenny likes to play them sure, mostly with Spike or Gunn, but between her books, her tutors and tinkering, she knew she could lose them entirely and never notice.

And it isn’t because she hurt Spike. Jenny loved Spike, and she never wanted to hurt him, but she was aware that, in all, a metal spike hardly had the ability to do any real damage. Wood was a vampire’s weakness, not metal. She was certain that he had already healed.

Jenny slowly came to realize that what made Angel’s punishment so upsetting, was the fact that it was _fair_.

If anything, it was lenient. She might have hit Faith, or Gunn or even herself with that spike instead, and the thought made her sick with guilt. How could she be that dumb?

Her punishment was fair, but it just reminded Jenny of all the times the unfair things that had come before.

Like when she was whipped for misplacing a shovel (it was broken by someone else), how she always ended up with the least amount of food and how everyone, Overseer and cow alike, looked at her like she deserved nothing but contempt.

Jenny shuddered when she imagined what might have happened to her if she’d hurt an Overseer like she had Spike. She knew that she would be lucky if they only killed her.

She could still remember the crack of the whip, the feel of torn flesh, how she sang for them and they still rejected her, and the constant ache that she just accepted, day in and day out before her family rescued her.

Faith, Spike, Angel and everyone else, they love her. Jenny knew that like she knew the sun would rise. In one week they did more for her than anyone who wasn’t her mother ever did for her in an entire year, and half the time they don’t even realize it.

Angel asks nothing of the roof he keeps over her head. Faith never gripes when Jenny tears a shirt or breaks a hammer. Gunn makes her lunch without being reminded, and she’s never hungry for longer than it takes to just _ask_ for food.

And when she’s in danger for whatever reason, none of them hesitate to come for her, and never once ask anything in return.

Food, shelter, protection. Small things to them, but to Jenny, they’re something she never thought she could take for granted.

The utter injustice, the unfairness of it all, then compared to her situation now, is like a vice on her heart. And Jenny is scared that if anyone found her crying now, she could never really explain it.

“Jen?”

Jenny didn’t turn to face Connor, as he entered the room. She’d forgotten that, as a rule, there was always someone at the Hyperion watching over her. The ‘Jenny Protocol’ was the nickname, and they took it seriously.

And today, Jenny realized it was just another example of just how _effortlessly_ they _cared_.

“You okay?”

“Yes,” Jenny said softly.

“Alright,” Connor said nothing, but he sat down beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder, “it’s okay for the past to hurt.”

Connor didn’t say anything else, he just stayed there until the tears had passed, and then went to the movies as planned. He never dug further, but Jenny didn’t need him to. Him just being there was enough, and they both knew it.

_Jenny thought Connor was the perfect brother, but he didn’t quite agree._

Connor loved that fact that Jenny was Fred’s daughter. With his memories restored, Connor remembered how he misled her and Gunn, those painful months as they sought to find the man he had sunk to the bottom of the ocean. The couple was wracked with worry, but Fred never allowed that to stop her from caring about Connor, all the while he was stabbing her in the back in so much she metaphorically resembled a pin cushion.

Frankly, Connor thought he got off easy with Fred and her taser.

Fred was gone by the time he remembered, but Connor liked to think that he was making it up to her by being the best big brother to Jenny that he could be. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

And it wasn’t that Connor didn’t love Jenny as much as she loved him. She was cute, bright, and could be pretty helpful with his homework, while she helped fill the hole in his heart where his fake family, the Reilly’s, had once been. The deal Angel had struck with Wolfram and Hart fell apart when LA was thrown into hell, and they’d slowly forgotten him, like a waking dream.

Connor knew he could have fought to keep them, but he also knew he didn’t have the right. Not after they gave him the balance, the perspective on life that he so desperately needed. It might have been fake, but the lessons weren’t. So he took the lessons they taught him, and the lessons his real dad gave him, and used them to be the best big brother to Jenny he could be.

But a small part of him, a part he’d never let anyone see, was a little jealous that Jenny would be able to spend what was left with her childhood with Angel as her father. It was stupid and immature, and it was barely a spark in Connor’s heart on his darkest days but Connor thought it was enough to disqualify him as perfect.

And he was a little annoyed that Jenny had adopted Faith as, well…no one was quite certain how to describe Faith’s parental role when it came to Jenny. She decked Spike for calling her maternal and Faith was only feminine in the most technical sense (dresses aside), but Jenny was attached to her all the same.

Which meant that no matter how hot she was, Faith was off-limits.

Because Connor had had enough pseudo-incest for one lifetime.  

 

 


	7. Gunn

Gunn

It was best described as thinking through wax.

After what was supposed to be the final battle, Charles Gunn felt as if he’s fallen asleep. Every now and then, some interesting noise made its way through. But the only thing that remotely registers to Gunn as anything but background noise is two voices.

“…wrong, somehow. I could fix this entire ward, but…”

Gunn vaguely recognized the voice. He’s heard it before, sweet, honey like but with a strength that ran underneath.

“Then do it afterwards. But fix him first. He needs it, I need him and Jenny may need him most of all.”

As long as he lived, Gunn didn’t think he’d ever forget Angel’s voice.

Shortly afterwards, he felt a warm glow, and fell into a warm blanket of darkness.

When Charles Gunn awoke, he felt a familiar presence that could only be his old boss. Angel had a way of being stealthy and obvious all at once.

“Gunn,” Angel said, “how do you feel?”

“Like a million bucks,” Gunn croaked. He tried to swallow, but his throat was too parched.

“Here,” Angel filled a cup, and held it to his friend’s lips. Gunn drank it like a man dying of thirst, “take your time, Gunn. We have some things we have to discuss.”

“Yeah, yeah we do,” Gunn nodded.     

“Hold on,” Angel reached into his coat, and flipped his cell-phone open, “Spike, this is Angel. No, no, I’m not using that stupid codename. Because it’s stupid! Look, just keep Illyria busy, okay?”

“Illyria’s here?” Gunn asked, baffled. When they’d last met in hell, well, it wasn’t pleasant.

“She’s been your bodyguard,” Angel explained as he closed the phone, “more than a few demon lords were angry at me for returning LA to earth. You were seen as a soft target, so Illyria decided to discourage retaliation.”

“Really?”

Angel shrugged, “I think she was just looking for a decent fight before deciding whether or not to kill you.”

“Yeah, that sounds like our girl,” Gun sighed, “So I guess you decided to beat her to the punch?”

“Yeah, wait…what?”

Gunn shook his head, “I remember what happened with Wes now, and he only took your boy. Me, I did a lot worse, even if he’s alright now. Is he alright?

“He is, but Gunn, hold on…”

“I don’t blame you, Angel.”

“Wait, stop, back up. Gunn, you’ve got the wrong idea!”

“Really? Spike calling off my bodyguard, you, here alone? The math isn’t complex.”

“Gunn, what happened when we were in hell, that wasn’t you,” Angel said coolly, “believe me, I should know. I don’t add ‘with a soul’ to ‘vampire’ just to sound cool.”

“It may not have been my foot on the gas, but I was driving that car,” Gunn replied, “I think I understand your guilt trip better than anyone else by now. First Fred, now this…I’m ready, Angel.”

“Even if you were responsible, and you weren’t, you should know it’s not that easy,” Angel said, “it’s not about the mistakes you make in life, it’s how you use them to better yourself and the world around you, Gunn. And it’s a journey that never ends.”

“If you’re not here to kill me,” Gunn squeezed his eyes shut. He wasn’t much relieved, not with the weight of the guilt that hung over him now, “then why are you here? Why’s Spike distracting Illyria?”

“Your wounds were pretty bad,” Angel explained, “I called in a favor to have you healed. I need you, Gunn. You see, when the Senior Partners pulled LA into hell, I guess they were kinda rough on the laws of physics. Broke a few other dimensions when doing it, I guess. And see, Lorne, well, you might have heard…”

“You’re dissembling,” Gunn interrupted, “and you know, that’s like the first word Wolfram & Hart uploaded into my head. Neat word, dissembling. To conceal or disguise. If you’re not here to kill me or ask for an apology for killing your boy, why are you here, man?”

Angel steadied himself.

“Fred had a daughter, in Pylea. We found her.”

Angel studied Gunn carefully.

“Jenny.”

But it was Angel whose face was overcome with shock.

“…how did you know her name?”

Gunn closed his eyes, “Fred never wanted you guys to know, to worry it, but she had bad days. Once I woke up once and she was huddled in the corner, just shaking and her eyes were all bloodshot. Another night, she woke up crying, asking me where some people were. Jenny’s name came up, maybe twice, but honestly I didn’t think anything ‘bout it. I only remembered it because it sounded normal, ya know? Not like out of Lord of the Rings, or somethin’.”

Angel nodded.

“I actually managed to convince her to see a counselor. Fred said she didn’t last ten minutes before the guy gave her the hairy eyeball,” Gunn explained.

He thought it best to spare Angel the exact details, how Fred alternated between wracking sobs, because of how the man just casually dismissed five years of suffering with a roll of his eyes, like the pain, the beatings, the fear, like she just did not matter.  And when that hurt, that pain faded, it switched to a furious rage at the man for calling it all lies.

“What’s she like?”

Angel sighed, and sat down, “Brilliant, clever, got an appetite like her mother, loves to tinker but…”

Angel rubbed his hands together.

“She’s maybe seven years old but she’s not a kid, not really. She keeps inserting herself in our work, she does everything she can to be useful, and she is, but…” Angel shook his head, “I don’t think she sees any real difference between us and her old masters. She feels she has to be useful, and every time I try to get through to her otherwise, it feels like I’m either speaking in Spanish or she thinks I’m testing her.”

“I’m sure you’ll do better with her than we did with Connor,” said Gunn.

“Honestly? I might prefer it if she were like him, even just a little.”

“What, we got our memories back and you didn’t, boss man?” Gunn asked, “hey, the kid may be alright now, but you do remember him sinking you in the ocean, right?”

“Hard to forget,” Angel muttered, “but he was angry, spiteful. That’s something. Jenny’s the complete opposite. She goes out of her way to be useful, like redesigning a crossbow with retractable blades…”

“That ain’t so bad.”

“Gunn…”

“What? I spent my tenth birthday fashioning hiding places for stakes.”

“Well, if it was just that, it might not be that bad. But when she isn’t inserting herself into cases, she’s going out of her way to be out of the way.”

“What do you mean?”

Angel fell into the visitor’s chair and rubbed his chin, “Know how I said she had her Fred’s appetite? We…ah, didn’t know that at first. Not until she threw up Spike’s cigarette’s butts.”

“What?”

Angel shook his head, “She’d been eating out of the trash behind our back. When I asked her why she didn’t just ask for some more to eat, she said she didn’t think she had the right to.” 

“That’s…,” Gunn breathed out, “you think I can get through to her, maybe?”

“That’s what I’m hoping,” Angel said, “you were the closest to Fred. And I know it hurts to think about, but if anyone knows what might be going on in her head…”

“So the guy who made her an orphan is who you hope can get through to this little girl.”

“That’s a little crueler than I would have put it, but yeah yea that’s the gist.”

Gunn rubbed his forehead, “Angel, you gotta understand, Fred did not like talking about what happened. It was like pulling teeth from a grizzly bear!”

“Then if you fail, then you’re just another person in this little girl’s life who cares about her,” Angel said, “and believe me, she doesn’t have enough of that. You’ll be released in a few days. Give me a call, and we’ll go from there, okay?”

“Yeah,” Gunn said, silently hoping that Illyria would kill him before he was released.

oooOOooo

_Later_

Gunn opened the door to his apartment, half expecting it to be covered in dust and cobwebs. Relatively speaking, it had been months since he’d been back, but in reality it had been only a few weeks. Hell, he’d already paid his rent through the next eighteen months (thanks to Wolfram and Hart).

He moved through the apartment, feeling more like a home invader than a renter. His memories as a vampire, fighting for his friends, striking down innocent people, plotting to somehow make it all right again, be the hero that he desperately thought himself to be clawed at him.

He barely felt comfortable in his own skin, let alone his own apartment. Everything felt as if they belonged to another life.

Gunn felt that especially when his eyes fell upon an old picture of him and Fred together, smiling.

Unbidden, Gunn’s thoughts went back to the first time he’d heard Jenny’s name.

_Gunn flipped through the old Times magazine, more to pass the time than anything else. He didn’t know how long Fred would be, but in every TV show he’d watched these things lasted an hour, and it had barely been ten minutes._

_Gunn had just picked up a second, ancient magazine when he heard the door slam._

_“Charles! Charles, you take me home, now!” Fred growled._

_The look of pain, her face flush with anger made Fred almost unrecognizable, and she stormed past him without slowing down._

_“Baby, wait!” Gunn was on his feet in seconds, but by the time he’d caught up with Fred she was already outside, “hey, what happened?”_

_“What do you think happened, Charles?” Fred all but screamed in his face, indifferent to the people who were watching them, “I told him I fell into a portal to another world and he thought I was joking! That I was a stupid liar who just needed some fantasy to get laid!”_

_“He said that?”_

_“Yes! Five years! Five! Years! Five years of suffering, of starving, of not knowing if I was even sane,  he just shrugged off like it was a stupid joke!” Fred put her hands on her head, as if it were about to burst, “like B’orne didn’t…, like H’yrne hadn’t… like Jenny wasn’t… like like I wasn’t treated as some subhuman thing! Leashed like a dog!”_

_“Baby, take a breath, and calm down,” Gunn crooked his head towards the eyes that had fallen on them. Fred looked around, and began to feel very self conscious._

_“Come on, lets talk this out,” Gunn led Fred to a nearby bench, and the two sat down._

_“…I’m sorry,” Fred wiped the tears from her face, “can we just go back to the hotel and pretend this day never, ever happened ever?”_

_“We gotta talk about this first,” Gunn said, “look, it was stupid, going in cold. We can ask around, maybe talk to someone who knows about vampires and all that, okay?”_

_“Where are we going to find someone like that, Charles?”_

_Gunn hesitated, “…no idea, baby. But we can’t just give up!”_

_“I can’t go back,” Fred said softly._

_“Baby…”_

_“No,” Fred growled, “you don’t understand, I can’t go back. I can’t stand the idea that someone is going to look at me, hearing what I’ve been through, and think that I’m just crazy! Because I want to believe them!”_

_“Honey, what are you talking about?”_

_Fred blinked back the tears, “I’m sorry, it’s just that…sometimes I feel like I’m standing on the edge of a cliff. And a part of me just wants to fall backwards, to pretend it all never happened, to just…disconnect, just like before. And it scares me.”_

_“Do you wanna live like that all your life?” Gunn asked._

_“No, but I’m not always standing there,” Fred said, “every day, I feel more and more like I’m moving forward. You, Angel, Wesley, Cordelia, well, okay sometimes not Cordelia, you guys never make me feel like that. Maybe I didn’t grow up fighting vampires or some watching school, but I can handle it. I’m not alone, you know.”_

_“Fred, come on…”_

_“And I am getting better. I use actual paper for my equations now, not my wall.”_

_“I know that, but you can’t move forward without looking back.”_

_“Charles, I remember the fortune cookie you took that from,” Fred smiled._

_“Surprised you didn’t eat the paper,” Gunn chuckled._

_“Well, it was a little too stringy,” Fred said, “look, lets revisit this later, okay? I wanna make someone regret an all you can eat buffet, and have crazy monkey sex with my boyfriend, okay?”_

Gunn put the picture back. He wondered if he pushed just a little harder, if Fred might have been able to confront her past, maybe find Jenny before Fred…before he…

Gunn’s thought went to a dark, familiar place, about what could have been, what should have been and what actually was.

Gunn didn’t hear the first knock, or the second, and so on.

“’ey, Cueball! Open the bloody door!”

Gunn’s head snapped to the side, and he rolled his eyes.

“Spike,” Gunn sighed, and rolled his eyes. He opened the door for the British vampire.

“You know the rules ‘ere, mate,” Spike said.

“You didn’t lose that soul of yours, did you?”

“Do I look like some tit who misplaces something that important?” Spike asked, “and besides, unless you got yourself a kitten for me not to eat?”

“What? No!”

 “Then you have to trust me. Now let me in, Charlie boy!”

“Fine, fine,” Gunn sighed, “get your white vampire ass in here.”

“Thanks.”

Spike sucker-punched Gunn in the gut, and stepped inside.

“Spike…the hell?”

“Sorry, didn’t enjoy that,” Spike said, “well, much.”

“I think I know what this is about,” Gunn stood up, “but if you think I’m gonna let that sucker punch go, you got another thing coming, blondie.”

Gunn came at Spike with all the experience of a lifetime of fighting vampires gave him.

And Spike just yawned, blocked each punch and grabbed Gunn by the collar and tossed him on his couch.

“Lucky I’m still healing, you bleach blond asshole.”

Spike fell onto the couch next to Gunn, “Keep telling yourself that, Charlie boy. I killed two slayers. You’re good, but not good enough.”

Gunn rubbed his sore stomach, “I’m guessing this is about why haven’t I seen the kid, right?”

“Something like that,” Spike said.

“Ya know, I did just get my ass out of the hospital,” Gunn observed.

“An’ that’s any excuse?” Spike said, “I’ve been waiting for your cue ball since you got back. Had to come inside so I didn’t go up like a roman candle.”

Gunn glanced outside, and was surprised to see the new sun.   

“Well, shit.”

“So way I see, you can either stay here with a very annoyed vampire who intends to catch up on his stories, or head over to Angel’s roach motel and meet the newest addition to our odd little family.”

“I wasn’t avoiding it!”

“Really?”

Gunn rubbed his eyes, “What, am I supposed to the great black hope?”

Spike shrugged, “Sure, why not?”

Gunn leaned forward and sighed, “What am I supposed to do? Have you guys thought of that?”

“We have, actually,” Spike said, “bloody hell, we expect it. So no pressure. Literally.”

“Thank you Spike, if you ever get tired of poetry, you should try greeting cards.”

“Thanks. Now move your arse,” Spike flicked Gunn upside the head. Gunn tried to ignore it, like he was back in school, but Spike just did not quit. And his vampire strength made it hard to ignore.

“Stop it.”

Spike didn’t.

“Stop it!”

Spike ignored him.

“Jesus Spike!” Gunn leapt up off the couch, “what the hell do you want from me? How do you expect me to help this girl when I’m the one who made her a god damn orphan?”

“Well, she’s technically not an orphan,” Spike said, “though, she will be if we ever find her real dad.”

“You know what I mean,” Gunn said.

“It was Knox who put her in that bloody room and both you and I know that, mate. Not saying you acted the most honorably afterwards, but…”

“Accessory after the fact,” Gunn tapped his skull, “still got the legal mumbo jumbo up here, man. Ain’t no excuse for what I did.”

“Very well then,” Spike sighed, “I, Judge William the Bloody, hereby sentence you to a lifetime of community service. There’s a sweet little girl at this dusty hotel, start there, eh?”

“…what if I can’t help?” Gunn said.

“Then at least you tried, same as the rest of us,” Spike said, “you what you’re problem is? You’re not asking the right question here, mate.”

“What question is that?”

“You’re asking yourself if you can help. The real question you should be asking yourself…”

“You undead bastard, don’t you dare…!”

“What would Fred do?”

oooOOooo

When Gunn walked through the doors of the Hyperion, it felt strange.

He set down the buckets he’d been carrying, and looked around. The old place, didn’t look so old. But it didn’t feel like walking into the past, or a stranger in a strange land like he did at his apartment.

“Hey, Gunn, right?”

Gunn saw Faith strolling down the hall, axe slung over one shoulder, a gym bag of weapons in the other and an easy smile on her face.

“That’s right. Faith, right? The boss man, where he at?”

“He’s in the ballroom with the sprout and Kate,” Faith said. She set down her weapons, looked at the buckets in his hands, the boxes that rested on top and gave Gunn an odd look.

“What’s the story there?”

“Testing a theory, and hopefully having some fun. So, you hanging around for a while?”

Faith threw her head back and sighed dramatically, “Why does everyone keep asking me that? A roof and getting paid to beat up things, who’d turn that down?”

“No offense meant, girl, but after Hell A, well, I just wanna know where we’re all going from here, is all.”

“Well, I’m in for the long haul,” Faith said, “guess you wanna see Jenny, right?”

“Right,” Gunn said.

“Coo’. We could always use more help,” Faith picked up the weapons, “but Gunn, just a heads up…?”

“Lemmie guess, if I hurt the girl, bad things?” said Gunn, “Faith, I loved Fred, and I’m not about to tear into her daughter ‘cause of her daddy.”

“Good to know,” Faith said, “I’m sorry about your friend, I am dude, but I didn’t know her. All I really remember about Fred was that she tried to brain bang Willow, and that was awesomely awkward afterwards. But I know Jenny.

She’s a sweet kid. Deserves better than she’s gotten. So if you hurt her intentionally, I really dunno what I’ll do. I just know it will be bloody, long and freakin’ epic. Feel me?”

Gunn nodded, “I feel ya. No worries.”

“Good. Now go see her,” Faith said, “I got me something undead to kill. Maybe.”

Gunn made a pit stop by the old, defunct laundry room, and then went to the ballroom.

The room looked more like it belonged on the set of Law & Order than any detective series. There were five corkboards, one with a map of LA with a half dozen colored pins, another had pictures of vampires in various states of transformation, the third had what seemed like random newspaper clippings, the fourth was another map of LA, but this time it was covered in stickys that had business names written on them, and the last one had a confusing series of math equations on it.

Gunn saw Angel and Kate Lockley studying the board, with a little girl standing between them.

“Gunn!” Angel’s relief was almost palpable, “glad you could make it!”

“Couldn’t keep me away, boss man,” Gunn said. He crooked his head to look at Jenny, “who’s the little lady?”

“Jenny, this is my friend Gunn,” Angel put a hand on Jenny’s back and gently nudged her forward.

“Hello,” Jenny gave Gunn a quick smile before casting her eyes down. She had a death grip on a juice box, and shy didn’t begin to describe the girl.

“Great to meet you, kiddo,” Gunn said. He didn’t have to look hard to see that Jenny was indeed Fred’s daughter. If her appearance wasn’t enough, that brief, flashing smile was probably a Burkle trademark. Fred smiled, but you had to know the girl to know what they meant. This quick, hesitant smile meant that she was still evaluating you, studying the situation and hoping that you were nice.

“So what you all got going on here?”

“Oh!” Jenny’s head snapped up, and went to the first corkboard, “I’ve been documenting vampire attacks. I have a theory that neophyte vampires refuse to travel beyond a certain distance from their lair. And I’ve found that when you take into account low income housing and empty lots, you could find a nest of vampires with fifty percent less effort.”

“Sounds cool,” said Gunn.

“Oh, oh!” Jenny went to another section of the map, and pointed to where there were no pins, “see that? There are no known vampire attacks there. Why is that? Because nothing can be something! That an industrial shipping area. I think that’s how foreign vampires are smuggled in. Faith is going to check it out for me.”

“She’s like a calculator for supernatural crime,” Kate said, “the FBI needs whole teams to read through hundreds of case files to do what she’s done in the last week.”

“I’m just helping,” Jenny said meekly.

“Sometimes I think it’s just us helping you,” Angel smiled at Jenny, “we struggle to keep up, to be honest.”

“I can see. Got all this done in a week, huh? You a real slav…”

Gunn stopped himself, and saw the looks Angel and Kate were giving him.

“…cker hater, slacker hater, huh?”

Jenny gave Gunn a curious look.

_Smooth,_ Gunn thought to himself. “Say, how about we do something else for a bit? What do you say?”

Jenny looked at Gunn with uncertainty, then to Angel.

“I… really shouldn’t. Angel, he needs this cow to…”

“Jenny,” Angel interrupted. His voice was soft but firm, “we don’t use that word here. And it’s fine if we do something else for a while.”

Gunn smirked. Angel had the perfect ‘Dad’ voice.

“Good, we need us ref.”

oooOOooo

“So this is why you smell like a bar even though you haven’t had a drop to drink.”

 Angel looked at the two buckets filled with beer bottles, two more empty buckets at the far end of the room, and then to Gunn. Gunn gave Angel his patented ‘trust me’ look, so Angel just shrugged. Hopefully, whatever he had in mind would be successful in getting Jenny to open up, even if Angel had no real idea what Gunn was thinking.

They were in one of the hotel’s old laundry rooms that had been in the middle of being remodeled when the place was shut down. There were no washing machines or dryers’, though the pipes were there. Mostly, it was just a dull, grey room with white floors and a drain. The only reason Angel never turned it into a storage space because it was too far out of the way and frankly, a little depressing.

Jenny looked at the buckets, but had her hands crossed behind her back, careful not to touch the contents.

“Well, I did have to rummage through some recycling bins for this game,” said Gunn, “by the way and obviously, I’ll do the clean up. But first, I got a present for our girl here.”

Jenny’s eyes lit up, and Gunn recognized another Burkle smile. But when he gave her the box, it flipped to confusion.

“What’s this?” Jenny asked in a practiced neutral tone.

“Called a Transformer,” Gunn slid the toy out of the box, “this bad ass is named Optimus Prime. He goes from robot…” Jenny watched Gunn manipulate the toy into becoming something else, “…to a truck.”

Jenny took the toy from Gunn’s hand, and began examining it with laser-like intensity. She took the toy from robot to truck and back, studied the joints, observed the angles of the plastic mold, all while reconstructing it in her mind’s eye, and thinking of ways to improve it, where there was too much plastic or not enough.

 Jenny did that for a whole five minutes before Angel cleared his throat, and Jenny’s attention snapped back to them.

“This is mine?” Jenny asked carefully.

“’Course, unless you don’t want it,” Gunn said.

“I didn’t say that.”

“All yours then,” Gunn said, “I got you something else, but you gotta play me for it.”

“Play?” Jenny looked at Gunn, then to Angel. It wasn’t that the little girl was unfamiliar with the concept, far from it. Even as a slave they managed to create a few games here and there, during the slow season, and during a few stolen moments during the harvest.

However, she was unfamiliar with it being spoken out loud. Overseers only tolerated it when they didn’t see it, or there wasn’t something else to be done. And like an obscenity, it was never spoken of aloud, especially in the presence of an authority figure. It just wasn’t done.

But Jenny observed Angel’s lack of response, his complete indifference and decided to go with it.

 “Sure,” Gunn picked up a beer bottle and tossed it across the room, where it landed in the bucket with a crash.

Jenny covered her mouth, shocked at what she’d just seen.

“See, like that,” Gunn explained.

“But Gunn, that’s _glass_ ,” Jenny whispered anxiously.

“Yup,” Gunn picked up another bottle, and tossed it towards the bucket. This time he was off by a foot, and it smashed against the cement floor.

“But…” Jenny looked at the beer bottles again, and then to Angel.

“It’s fine,” Angel said, while making a mental note not to allow Jenny within five feet of what would doubtlessly be a pile of broken shards within the next few minutes.

“Just don’t go using Angel’s regular stuff for this,” Gunn said. He offered Jenny a bottle, and the young girl took it carefully.

Jenny looked at the glass. On Pylea, glass was a sign of status, of wealth. It was art with function or family heirlooms that had endured for generations, created by master artisans that trained for years to master the form. Jenny had seen a dozen slaves traded for one single window pane, and remembered what happened to H’orke, how he suffered when he smashed a bottle. And he was the Overseer’s _son_.

Jenny didn’t even try to make the picket. She pitched the beer bottle across the room where it smashed against the wall into a million pieces.

“Ha!” Jenny was so giddy with excitement, she was literally shaking.

“Come on, girl, try to get the bucket,” Gunn smiled, as he tossed another one underhanded.

Jenny was barely listening. Her heart was pounding in her ears, her blood coursing with excitement. The act of destroying what was a status symbol of the rich and powerful, the same people responsible for everything wrong in her life up until now, was an intoxicating rush literally unlike anything Jenny had ever felt before.

When it was all over, Jenny was gasping for breath, and barely even aware that she’d only tossed one bottle out of two dozen into the bucket.

“Well, that’s a good first game,” Gunn said and then turned to Angel, “so ref, who won?”

“That’s pretty obvious to me,” said Angel, “Jenny won.”

“I…didn’t,” Jenny said, “I didn’t conform to the rules, I’m sorry…”

“You win because you don’t have to clean up,” Angel said.

 “Sounds fair to me,” Gunn shrugged. He picked up a plastic gold tiara he’d bought from a party supply store, and carefully handed it to Jenny.

The little girl’s eyes lit up. She was smart enough to recognize the cheap plastic and fake jewels as exactly that, but it was still jewelry, it was still pretty and it was meant for _her_.

Jenny put it on carefully, as if it were a real crown and picked up her transformer.

“Thank you, Gunn,” Jenny said.

“No problem, kid,” Gunn patted her head playfully, “just don’t go playing this game with Angel’s good stuff or without permission, okay?”

“I won’t. I know that destruction of property is only allowed in a certain context,” Jenny said softly, “but, I meant thank you for loving my mother, for making her happy. You must have been very close.”

“Yeah, we were,” Gunn said with his best poker face.

“Can I go to my room?” Jenny asked.

“Of course,” Angel said.

The two watched Jenny rush off with her new possessions.

“If there was any doubt in my mind, there ain’t now,” Gunn said, “that girl is too smart. You know that, right?”

“Ooooh yes,” Angel drawled, “still, good work, Gunn. How’d you know? I’d completely forgotten that glass used to actually worth something, a few hundred years ago.”

“Hey, if you thought I knew to do that because of some inside Fred info, you’re wrong there, boss man,” Gunn replied, “I just remember doing it as a kid. Breaking stuff and not getting in trouble? Don’t have to have been a slave to enjoy that. Honestly?” Gunn shook his head, “I wonder if we even knew Fred.”

“Don’t,” Angel growled, “none of us are perfect. You traded your soul for a truck, I tried to lose mine with Darla, Wes kidnapped my infant son, and Cordelia didn’t warn us what would happen to Fred, choosing instead to send us about the Circle. We all have our reasons for our secrets, but that doesn’t change who we are fundamentally. We knew Fred, even if we didn’t.”

“Yeah, yeah you’re right,” Gunn shrugged, “The tiara was a Fred thing, though.”

“Well, whatever, I’ll take it. I think we’ve made more progress today than the last few weeks that she’s been with us.”

A pause.

“But that doesn’t mean you’re going to help me clean up, are you?”

“Are you kidding?”  Angel produced a broom and dustpan, and Gunn realized he hadn’t even noticed that Angel must have done his disappearance thing during the game to retrieve them, “I’m just the ref. You lost, fair and square.”

“’Course, make the black man do the manual labor,” Gunn groused, as he went to work.

“Sorry, that doesn’t work on me,” Angel said, “I ate too many slave owners to feel guilty about slavery. They tasted as rich as you might expect.”

“Heh, yeah you’re a vampire Dr. King,” Gunn dumped a load of glass into the bucket, “I know you don’t wanna hear this, Angel, but keeping a kid here? That causes all kinds of issues. You want me to cite all the laws we’re breaking just keeping her by alphabetical order, state or Federal?”

“I know,” Angel rubbed the back of his neck.

“And, ya know, Illyria. She says she doesn’t have Fred’s memories anymore, but she straight up told me Fred was the only reason she didn’t kill me. And what happens when Jenny sees her?”

“I know, Gunn,” Angel said under his breath.

“And when she gets older, she’ll need a social security number if she wants a job besides killing creepy crawlies.”

“I know!” Angel shouted, “and there are a million other things that have to be sorted, Gunn. Believe me, I know. Do you really think I haven’t brooded about all this?”

“Fair enough.”

“Just sweep. We made a lot of progress today, and you’re harshing my buzz.”

“Harshing your buzz? You get that from Faith?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, give it back.”

oooOOooo

_Later_

When Angel went to check in on Jenny, he couldn’t help but smile as he found her sprawled out on the floor, Optimus Prime clenched in one hand, a dozen odd stretches relating to said toy scattered across the floor, along with two small empty jars of peanut butter.

Angel gently pried the toy from her hand, removed the tiara from her head, and scooped her up. Jenny barely stirred as he put her to bed. He pulled the covers over her, and gently tucked her in. He picked up the peanut butter jars, turned off the lights and closed the door.

Angel stood there, drinking in the moment, savoring the illusion that everything was normal and he was just a regular adoptive father who’d put his little girl to bed.

Angel knew it was just an illusion. He had enemies, enemies that would come at him through her. Jenny was half demon in a world of humans, and unlike most she couldn’t hide it. And the only right he had to even be her adoptive father, beyond how he loved her mother, was the fact was the fact that he was strong enough to protect her from the people who wanted to hurt her because of him.

The irony was not lost on Angel.

But today, after hearing her heart pounding in excitement, seeing the pure joy on her face, today it was an illusion he was willing to buy.

 

 


	8. Illyria

Hereditary

Jenny Burkle was not Fred reborn, her family quickly accepted that but she did have some traits in common with her mother all the same. Her intelligence, her compassion, her strength of character, and ability to consume her own body weight in food inside of a day without truly gaining an ounce of weight.

And, finally, when her family was hurt, her _rage_.

And her family saw this for the first time, truly saw it, was when Jenny finally met Illyria.

It started, as most things do, as a quiet night. Faith and Jenny were in the refurbished first floor room that had been remodeled and conjoined, Faith watching a movie while nursing a sprained ankle (and it wasn’t sprained because she was trying to look cool, no matter what Spike said), Jenny sprawled out on the floor in front of her, doing the homework that had been assigned by her tutors and Angel was upstairs trying to identify a new species of demon he’d come into conflict with two nights before, and everyone else was on patrol or working a case.

“I need a drink,” Faith muttered, “hey, sprout, want something?”

Jenny didn’t react, per usual. Angel had hired a series of private tutors for her, but each one seemed to quit after a few days, because by then it was Jenny was more qualified to teach them then the other way around. Physics, biology, geology, and even mechanics just for spice, there wasn’t a single science that Jenny hadn’t mastered once she understood the fundamentals.

The only exception, of course, was history. There was no science to it, and, ironically, that’s why Jenny loved it.

“Hey,” Faith tapped Jenny with her foot to get her attention, “want anything?”

“Coke,” Jenny didn’t look up from her books.

“Yeah, not after that braces crap. Orange juice it is.”

Jenny didn’t care. She was too absorbed in her book, learning slash discovering about the Ancient Rome Empire with the rise of Christianity (mainly because she was working on a unified faith theory concerning the power of the Cross against vampires but she was hard pressed to identify when vampires and the Church came into formal conflict). Jenny loved the sheer enormity of history. To her, it was a mountain she could climb forever.

Jenny heard someone enter, but ignored it. With all the magical safeguards that were cast on the hotel itself, Jenny knew whoever it was meant no harm (hopefully). Likely Spike, or Gunn or Kate, or…

“Genny…?”

Faith dropped the beer in her hand, and Angel leapt from his chair when they felt the scream. It was ear-piercing, rattled every glass in the hotel and communicated terror right down to their bones.

Vampire and Slayer were there in seconds, and what they saw was like a punch to the gut.

“Get away, you’re not her, get away you’re not her!”

“Genny, please, it’s mommy!”

Winifred Burkle knelt down until she was at eye level with her daughter, arms outstretched with tears of joy streaking down her face, while Jenny had her back pressed against the weapons cabinet so hard the glass had begun to crack.

Except Angel and Faith knew it wasn’t Fred. Fred was gone, dead. A memory now, and nothing more.

But Illyria, the creature that had ended her, was all too real.

It was sheer luck they’d made it this far, Angel would later reflect. He and his team had used every trick in the book to keep tabs on the Demi-Goddess, to keep her and Jenny apart. They had some close calls, but if there was one advantage to owning a hotel, it was the ability to scuffle little green girls around without anyone being the wiser.

For over three months, it had worked. It worked brilliantly. Lorne, Spike, Gunn and even Kate, bent over backwards to keep Illyria distracted, or at the very least away from the Hyperion and thus, from Jenny.

Three months, over ninety days and hundreds of hours and Angel still had absolutely no idea how to handle the situation that was now unfolding right in front of him.

“Genny, please,” ‘Fred’ begged. She saw how terrified her ‘daughter’ was, and was hesitant to approach no matter how her heart ached, “it’s Mommy, don’t be afraid, I missed you so much. I’m sorry I got so lost, but I’m here now!”

Jenny was pressed against the weapons cabinet, struggling to understand what was happening. Everyone had told her that her mother was dead, yet here she was, real as day. Jenny had met enough vampires, seen enough illusions and read enough about shape-shifters to disregard them all as possibilities.

None of them could perfectly duplicate her mother’s skin tone, her body language, the lines in her skin when she smiled, the way her hair parted and a million other small clues that gave Jenny a terrifying sense of familiarity just looking at her.

“Illyria!”

 Angel grabbed the demi-Goddess by the shoulders, and pulled her away from Jenny, while Faith leapt in front of the terrified girl, fists clenched. Faith knew it was stupid, but some part of her thought that if she could just keep Jenny from seeing Illyria more, it would somehow make all this hurt just a little less.

“Angel! Oh my god you found her! You found my Genny!”

“Shut up!” Angel couldn’t help but snarl. Every second this dragged on, he knew the pain it caused Jenny would only multiply, “you are not Winifred Burkle! You are Illyria!”

The horror that gripped Jenny Burkle didn’t fade when she watched the form of her mother become something else entirely.

“Illyria?” Angel gave the Old One a piercing look.

“I am,” Illyria looked at Angel, then to the still terrified Jenny, “…myself again.”

“Well, be yourself elsewhere, God damn it!” Faith snarled, still standing between Jenny and Illyria, “Angel, get that smurf the hell out of here now, before…”

“She took the dirt…” Jenny’s voice was soft, but still somehow carried over everything, “she took the dirt from my mother!”

“Before that,” Faith muttered, “oh shit on a stick.”

Willow said it was called it hyper-vigilance, Angel called in intuition, Faith called it being uber-smart. Whatever it was, Jenny had an amazing eye for detail and body language at times. She could, at times, pick Slayers, vampires and even disguised demons out of a crowd with just a few keen observations about body language.

It was hardly a superpower and wasn’t something Jenny did all the time, but when she had bursts of insight, there was simply no keeping the truth from her.

The little green girl trembled as she reached into the weapons cabinet, and grabbed a mace.

“Give it back!” Jenny screamed.

“Whoa, hold up there, sprout!” Faith held her hands out, pleading with Jenny to stop, but the young girl could barely see past her own tears and burning rage, “put that down now!”

Jenny swung the mace at Faith, confident that she would duck out of the way like she’d done in countless battles and sparring lessons. Jenny never expected to actually connect, she just needed the Slayer out of the way so she could do what had to be done.

But connect she did. It was a glancing blow, but the mace still struck Faith upside the head and she went sprawling to the ground, and Jenny just stopped.

“Faith!” Angel was at her side in seconds, his stomach in a knot.

Jenny froze. The path to Illyria was now wide open, but Faith was laying on the floor bleeding.

Because of her.

To say she was conflicted would be like describing lava as hot. Hate and guilt struggled against one another, like a tornado in her brain. But all that wasn’t enough to keep the wheels in her head from turning, and it only took another moment to recognize the familiarity between Angel, Faith and Illyria.

“You knew,” Jenny dropped the mace, looked at Angel and then to Faith, blood pouring from her scalp, “you knew everything and you never told me!”

“Jenny, just take a breath,” Angel knew there wasn’t much chance of that, “and let us explain.”

“You liar,” Jenny’s voice was soft, and that’s what scared Angel the most. He’s come to recognize ‘liar’ as the most damning word in Jenny’s vocabulary, “you lied and I hate you all!”

Jenny looked at Illyria, and saw that the demi-goddess was standing between her and the direction of her room. Jenny gave her a wide berth, as if Illyria were radioactive, all the while trying to understand the piercing look Illyria was giving her

Once she made it past, Jenny raced to her room and slammed the door.

Angel fought the urge to run after her, but he couldn’t, not with Faith still bleeding from a head wound and Illyria standing around like a deer caught in headlights. Hell, a small part of him just didn’t want to deal with what was to come next.

“Damn it,” Angel growled, “Faith! Faith, you okay?”

“…’m five by five,” Faith muttered. She was on her back, hand pressed to her head.

“Try not to move, okay?”

“Screw that,” Faith drawled, “get me a bandage. We’re late to an ass-kicking, Angel.”

Angel went to where they had a first-aid kit stashed and removed some gauze, “Faith, I don’t want to excuse her actions, but we knew something like this was going to happen eventually. We need to tread carefully, and…”

“Wait, you thought I meant we were gonna kick ass?” Faith pressed the bandage to her head, “yeah, dream on. What about blue? She gonna keep?”

“Illyria?” Angel glanced at the Old One, and saw her examining the books Jenny had left on the ground.

“I…will endure,” Illyria handled the journals delicately, as if they were made of tissue, “see to the young hybrid. Please.”

Angel and Faith exchanged a glance. Faith didn’t know Illyria as well as Angel, but they both knew that she was someone who made strong, bold statements. The closest she’d come to humility as far as Faith knew was offering to disembowel Haxil Beast quickly (she hadn’t).

And hybrid? Since when did Illyria use scientific terms?

Angel brushed the thought aside, and looked at Faith, “Ready for this?”

“Hell naw,” Faith forced herself to her feet, “but lets do this anyways.”

The two marched to Jenny’s room in silence. Neither of them could think of anything to say to one another that might make this entire situation any better. They’d saved the world a half dozen times between them, but Slayer and Vampire found that none of that prepared them for what they had to do now.

“Jenny? Could you please open up?” Angel rapped on the door, and wasn’t too surprised when he saw it cause a spark.

Ever since taking Jenny in, Angel had done everything he could to make the Hyperion as safe as (in)humanly possible for her. Every floor had its own safe room, with reinforced steel in the walls, floor and ceiling, crossbows, wooden stakes, blood bound spells and supplies to survive two and a half Apocalypses.

And the strongest, the best of all those was, of course, Jenny’s room. She knew how to activate the spells, lock the door and basically do everything she would ever need to block out the rest of the world for weeks in the event of an attack.

Which was good in most circumstances, but a small issue here.

“Never!” Jenny shouted.

“She sounds mad,” Faith winced.

“Just a little,” Angel removed a small pocket knife, and cut the tip of his finger. He smeared his blood on the knob, and uttered a sentence in tenth century Sumerian. He felt a bit of static shoot through his arm, confirming that he was still in possession of his soul (Willow’s idea, and no one objected) and then the spells protecting the door deactivated, and the lock opened itself.

“Jenny, we’re coming in,” Angel said. He pushed the door, but was only able to open it an inch before it came to a full stop. Angel shook the door, and then threw his shoulder against the door, to no effect.

“Are we?”

“She’s wedged the door,” Angel said.

“Go away! She took the dirt and you don’t even care!”

“She by the door?” Faith asked.

Angel shook his head.

Faith pushed Angel aside, and kicked the door open, turning the stake that had been used as a wedge into so many splinters.

Jenny was at the foot of her bed, hands on her knees, and tears streaming down her eyes. She took deep, steady breaths, much like a bull getting ready to charge, and her anger was almost palpable.

“We need…we need to explain,” said Angel. He opened his mouth to do exactly that, but nothing came. Together, the lies and truth felt like bile in his mouth. He had no idea how he might explain it all to an adult, let alone a child.

“There’s nothing to explain,” Jenny said, “you lied and you let that…that thing take the dirt from my mother!”

“Take the dirt?” Faith gave Jenny a curious look, “kid, what the heck are you talkin’ about?”

“They beat us, they whip us, they burn us, but we have the dirt, in the dirt we have peace,” Jenny stared straight at the floor, and Angel and Faith felt a chill down their spine, “they eat us, they kill us, but we have the dirt! We work until we bleed, until we fall, until we break but we have the dirt at the end!”

Angel took a step back. Jenny’s voice had a distant, haunted quality to it. She wasn’t talking to them from earth, not in spirit.

“Sprout, what are you…”

Jenny’s head snapped up to look them in the face.

“That thing! Is in my mother’s corpse! You stupid morons!” Jenny’s voice carried throughout the hotel.

Angel said nothing. What could he say? The look of pain, of confusion, of sheer hurt that Jenny gave him cut like a knife, made all the worse by the fact that it was the truth.

Faith said nothing because up until now, she’d never seen Jenny like this. To Faith, she defined a sweet kid, rarely even raising her voice. It was as if Jenny’s personality had done a 360, and it was made all the harder, in Faith’s opinion, by the fact that she had a right to be pissed.

“Jenny, it’s…complicated…” Angel said weakly.

“You would never let it happen to an enemy,” Jenny spat. She stood up and stalked towards Angel with righteous anger. Both Faith and Angel took an involuntary step back, “let their body become a play thing! A puppet…!”

“Jenny, I wish it were that simple,” Angel forced all thoughts of Gavin Parks from his mind, “but it’s not…”

“Liar!” Jenny lunged at Angel and began pounding away on the vampire, “you lying liar! I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!”

Jenny’s small fists didn’t hurt Angel nearly as much as her words. Countless stab wounds, the fires of hell itself, the acidic burn of holy water, Angel learned that the pain of all that, none of it could begin to compare to the anger, words and tears that Jenny was directing at him now.

But he simply took it, and held her close, until she was spent.

Exhausted, Jenny clutched Angel’s shirt just to stand, and sobbed into his chest 

 “You said you were her friend,” Jenny said softly, “that she was family and you loved her. How could you let this happen?”

“I didn’t let it happen,” Angel said softly, “I swear to you Jenny, I did everything in my power to save your mother, to save Fred. But it wasn’t enough, and what happened…happened.”

Angel knew how weak his explanation sounded, but it was long since agreed by everyone that absolutely no one was to give any details whatsoever, to even allude to how Fred actually died, how she was hollowed out for Illyria’s takeover of her body. Jenny was too smart for her own good, and sometimes all it took was a single piece for her to assemble the entire puzzle.

But all it left them was vague reassurances about the thing that was in her mother’s body. Damned either way, Angel was still willing to cling to the option that caused Jenny just a little less pain.

“You should have destroyed that thing,” Jenny growled. She stepped back and looked Angel in the eye, “if you ever loved her, you would have given my mother peace! Let her rest! What you’ve let happen is obscene!”

“I couldn’t do that without destroying Illyria,” Angel said with a sigh. When he was running Wolfram & Hart, Angel actually had a team of dedicated scientists devoted to trying to find a way to do just that, to move Illyria into another form, to at least give Fred’s body a proper burial, but even that was beyond their abilities.

There simply was no way to remove Illyria from Fred’s body without destroying it, Illyria, or both. When the team learned that, it tore at them almost as much as Fred’s death.

“Then you should have done it!” Jenny screamed, “you said you loved her and you’re lying! How can you live with yourself?!”

“Jenny, no one can be blamed for how they came into this world, but they still have a right to be here all the same.”

Jenny recoiled back as if she’d been slapped and the turmoil in her head and heart came to a crashing halt. Then, very softly, she said “That’s… not fair. I…I’m not…I didn’t…”

“I never meant to hurt her,” Jenny said softly. The tears that began to roll down her cheeks came from another hole in her heart now, “I didn’t…”

Angel realized the thoughts that were going through Jenny’s head, and felt sick to his stomach.

“Wait, Jenny, stop, I didn’t mean…!”

“Okay, enough of this,” Faith grabbed Angel by his shoulder, and forcefully led him out, “Angel, I got this. Go see to Blue.”

Faith closed the door before Angel could argue, and the Slayer doubted he’d have any desire to press the point.

“I’m not like her,” Jenny said quietly, “I never meant to hurt her. I…”

Faith, acting on instinct, flicked Jenny’s horn.

“Ow! Hey!” Jenny snapped. She put her hand over the sore horn and gave Faith a look of irritation that drowned out the self doubt, if only for a moment, “I hate that!”

“Had to snap you out of stupid,” Faith sat down on the bed, and patted the spot next to her, “your momma loved you, kiddo and so do we. Now, I’m sorry we lied to you, believe you me, but we did it because we didn’t want to hurt you, and because we didn’t know how you’d react. And we weren’t exactly wrong there, now were we?”

Jenny, for the first time, truly saw the dried blood that covered half Faith’s face like war paint, the torn skin and purple flesh where the mace connected with Faith’s thick skull. The guilt of what she’d quickly drowned out her rage, and Jenny stood there, overwhelmed by self loathing and doubt.

“I’m sorry,” said Jenny. She took a seat by Faith, “I never meant…I just wanted…”

“I know,” Faith gave Jenny’s shoulder a gentle squeeze and pulled her close, “don’t sweat it, I figure I had it comin’ for lying to you. I’m okay, slayer healing, and all that.”

“Everybody lied. Gunn, Spike, Lorne…everyone.”

“Yup, guilty as charged. To spare you this. We were wrong and stupid, we both know that, but we’d do it again.”

“I thought I felt her,” Jenny said, as tears fell once more, “I never needed to know how she died, just that she was at peace. I thought we’d be together again…in the end, but…”

“Jenny, I’m not going to pretend I know how hard this is for ya…”

“She died,” Jenny said softly, “my mother died to me when they took me to the market, because I knew I would never see her again. And I was right. And now…”

Jenny squeezed her eyes shut.

“Now I have to see her dead face every day,” Jenny hissed, her throat clenching, “see something else wearing her flesh like…like a stupid shirt!”

“I’m sorry, sweet pea,” Faith hugged Jenny a little tighter, and began to worry. She remembered the stories of how Wesley compensated, how he jumped head first into the bottle. She shuttered to imagine how Jenny might respond, if left alone.   

“It’s not fair, how could Angel let…”

“I won’t give the speech, kid, and you don’t want the details, but I can give you the gist. Illyria is a person, however she came to be.”

“It’s obscene,” Jenny growled.

“Angel’s technically a dead body. So’s Spike.”

“That’s different,” Jenny said weakly.

Faith gently ran her fingers through Jenny’s hair, “Why? Because you know them, or because they’re not your mom?”

Jenny said nothing.

“I promise kid, everyone did everything they could to save Fred, and stop Illyria from taking over. That ain’t no lie. But they failed, and she’s here, and she’s done everything she can to make up for what she did. She never meant to kill your momma, and believe me, she regrets it. And she’s doing everything she can to make it right.”

“I don’t care.”

“Really? ‘Cause just because you ain’t seen it, don’t mean it ain’t happen. Illyria’s been helping us out this whole time, kiddo. Hell, she’s our biggest gun these days. I’m here today because of blue thunder.”

“Don’t care,” Jenny said weakly.

“Angel, too. And Spike, Gunn. I mean, we’ve helped save her butt too, but it all comes around.”

“Don’t care! Why is she still alive?” Jenny said, her voice filled with hurt.

“Don’t matter how many times you ask that, the answer won’t change. Because she never meant for what happened to happen,” said Faith, “and in the end, it doesn’t matter how someone was born. All that matters to us, all we really care about, is who they are.”

Faith ran her hand through Jenny’s hair and gave Jenny a soft kiss on the head.

“That’s one thing we never lied about.”

“I…I want to go to Connor’s,” Jenny replied, “please, I want…please…”

Faith knew that tone. That lost, confused tone that stopped just short of saying outright ‘I need to run away’. Her head and heart were a tangle of emotions, and being around the people responsible only made things worse.

And since Connor wasn’t here right now, Jenny could still lie to herself about whether he was part of it too.

“I’ll…give him a call,” Faith began to stand up, but then felt Jenny’s hand pressing down on her leg, “it’s late. First thing in the morning, okay?”

oooOOooo

Angel lurked outside of Jenny’s room until he was both satisfied that Faith had things in hand, and until he was absolutely certain he couldn’t put dealing Illyria off another minute.

When he finally returned to the Old One, she was still studying Jenny’s journals and books. And for one long, terrible moment, he shared Jenny’s pain.

Illyria didn’t look like Illyria. She looked like Fred with dyed blue hair. She looked like the young woman who he helped bring home after so many terrible years as a slave, who still found the strength to smile and courage to save others.

And while Angel wasn’t Gunn or Wesley, he loved Fred just as deeply. He loved her like the little sister he lost. He loved her selfishly, because she always saw him as a hero, an inspiration and believed in him with all her oversized heart.

But what was in his ad-hoc ‘family room’ wasn’t Fred, no matter what memories were still inside her head. She was Illyria, the Old One who’d saved his team time and again, who helped him in what was meant to be his final battle and helped Spike defend innocent people when LA was cast into hell. She was an ancient powerful demon God, who fought the good fight, and while she struggled with its exact nature, still did _good_.

Angel tried not to think about that, and tried not to wonder why he could save the world time and again, defy ancient evil but was denied something so simple as giving his friend’s body a proper burial.

 “The child,” Illyria looked from the books, and to Angel, “she is the offspring of Fred.”

“She is,” said Angel, “I have to ask, how did you recognize her? I thought you said that you had lost all of Fred’s memories. You, uhh…made a big deal about it in hell.”

“I believed I had,” Illyria said, “but it appears that I simply adopted Fred’s ability for cognitive dissonance. I was unable to reconcile what I had done, with who I now am. A…weakness in me sought to deny it all. Seeing the offspring…”

“Jenny. Her name is Jenny.”

“Seeing this Jenny…I was overwhelmed by memories. Memories I did not even know I was in possession of when I first took this form,” Illyria said, “Fred’s memories of her time in Pylea, they are…disconnected. Fragmented. Like a fog. And I believe this Jenny to be the cause.”

“How so?”

“Spike has been help in helping me understand humanity,” Illyria said, “he taught me a phrase by another dead poet, Walt Whitman…”

“Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes,” said Angel, “that was always one of Spike’s favorites.”

“It captures the essence of your kind’s weakness,” Illyria said with disgust, “Gunn, so smart and so stupid. You, wracked by guilt and doubt but lead by conviction. Fred, who could understand but could not comprehend.”

Illyria paused, and cocked her head, “And what you see as your ultimate expression of love, serving as a weapon of hate.”

“Did Fred…remember?” Angel asked, before he could stop himself. Illyria had full access to her memories, and would share anything asked, but they were still Fred’s memories, not hers. He had no right to use her like some twisted research tool simply because he was raising her daughter.

“And what will you tell this ‘Jenny’?” Illyria said, reminding Angel instantly that the creature standing across from him was empathic.

And in her own infuriating way, as was often the case, Illyria was absolutely right. It was a question that hung in the air, the elephant in the room, what did they tell Jenny when she asked why her mother never came back for her?  

“What you tell me, you can never tell anyone else,” Angel whispered with a voice of steel, “not Spike, not Gunn, not Lorne, not anyone. The only one who has any right to them is Jenny, if and when she asks.”

Illyria crooked her head to the side, like a curious animal.

“Those memories, those emotions, they are everything that Fred was,” Angel said, “they’re a gift that only Fred should be allowed to give anyone.”

“And yet, you demand it of me,” said Illyria.

“I have to know, I need to know, to help Jenny understand when she gets older,” Angel said, “but that doesn’t mean I’m not disgusted at myself for asking. But for Jenny, it’s a cross I have to bear. No pun intended.”

“Very well,” Illyria said, “Fred was brilliant, by mortal standards. But the portal that took her Pylea was her first experience with magic. Fred was confused and terrified, because she understood, perhaps better than those who use magic themselves.”

“Understood what?”

“Humans, and your limited understanding,” Illyria shook her head, “you limit yourself with words without even knowing it. Fred was not sent to another dimension or world. That word is too small, too limited. Pylea had its own stars, its own constellations and laws of physics. It is not a dimension, flat and partial, it was a whole other _universe_. Fred understood that. She understood that she could walk for a million miles, and still never return home. She understood that a planet that rotated around two suns would not do so at the same rate as a planet that rotated around one. And she understood that within the first ten minutes of arriving. She understood her situation, how small she was in the face of it but without knowledge of magic, did not comprehend how it had come to be.”

Angel nodded silently. He thought he knew how terrified Fred must have been, went she was sent to Pylea, but it never really occurred to him that her intelligence might make it all the worse. If the expression ignorance is bliss was true, than knowledge must have been hell itself.  

“She was…so lost.”

Angel raised an eyebrow at Illyria. She sounded almost…sympathetic.

“Fred was unaware of the station of humans on Pylea,” Illyria continued, “she was quickly educated, taken and sold at market. They swiftly recognized her as valuable. She was bought at a high price.”

“Valuable?” Angel clenched his fists, and thanked whatever guided the universe that neither Gunn nor Wesley were present to hear this.

“Humans are weak, and become weaker over time when their blood mixes with that of their kin. Pylea had been disconnected from earth for many generations,” Illyria explained, “one demon, a supposed breeder of livestock, recognized that this was not an issue with Fred.”

“Jenny,” Angel looked at the ceiling and swallowed hard. He thought the truth was something he had the strength to bear, but the fire burning in his gut said otherwise, “what…did she…what happened?”

“They bred her, and then sold her offspring after deciding she was acceptable stock,” Illyria said flatly, “Fred did not respond well. She tried to take the Overseer’s eye. She may have. That is when her memories become disjointed.”   

“Disjointed?”

“She convinced herself it was all a fantasy. That her time in LA was not real, that it was all an illusion in her head,” Illyria explained, “but she could not forget. That was why she did not fear your demonic form.”

Angel remembered that, in fragments and nightmares. His skin a sickly green, and his head covered in a crown of horns. And Fred, despite years of living with demons, showed no fear whatsoever.

“’We all have our demons,” Angel put his hand in his face and sighed, “that’s what she said to me afterwards. Damn it all…”

“Fred was not referring to Jenny,” Illyria replied.

“What do you mean?”

“Fred thought you would reunite her with her daughter. When you did not, the demon of which she spoke was the fact that she hoped Jenny was dead.”

Angel looked at Illyria in disbelief.

“You’re wrong. That’s now…Fred would never…That’s not who she was!”

“Fred understood, on some level, the potency of blood in magic,” Illyria said, “and reasoned that Jenny, with demon DNA, would be even more potent. She knew that some clans in Pylea ritually consumed their own. Jenny being dead was the kindest fate Fred could think of for the daughter that she would never see again. Her life as a slave had taught her new forms of fear.”

“I can only imagine,” Angel sighed.

“You cannot,” Illyria said, “Fred saw humans flayed, but kept alive for days by magic. She saw a Priest literally remove the mouth of another slave. Fred was nearly bought by a Sloth demon, who’s human slaves had bone protruding from their mouths. And that was simply her first week. You humans have no words for the enormity of fear that overtook Fred. Whenever Fred’s mind drifted to her daughter, that fear threatened to overwhelm her. So she refused to consciously approach it.”

Angel closed his eyes as memories of a dark night, a stand-off and a sickly light coming from a tear in reality flashed behind his eyes.

“I can imagine.”

 “Again, you do not,” Illyria said, “you could fight back. You could understand. Fred did not, could not until you took her from Pylea. She was weak, until you took the weight of an entire world off her shoulders, and made her strong. Strong, but not whole.”

“That’s enough,” Angel said. He felt sick in a way no medicine could cure. It wasn’t just learning the truth of what happened to Fred, but _how_ he learned it. Right now, he didn’t see himself as any better than the demons who enslaved Fred and treated her like an animal. If anything, Angel saw himself as worse. To them, Fred was an animal. But to him, Fred was a friend, a sister, _family_. And her he was, taking something so intimate from her that he had no right to.

“You wish for me to leave. My presence disgusts you,” Illyria said.

“ _Yes_ ,” thought Angel, but he said, “No. You’re still my friend, and you’re one of us now…”

“To whom you have lied to for several months. Lorne, Gunn, all of you are guilty of great deception, with no guilt or hesitation whatsoever. I would be justified in killing at least two of you for such an affront.”

“…point,” said Angel, “look, Illyria, you leaving won’t change the fact that you exist. And as painful as it might be for Jenny right now, she’s going to have to deal with it somehow. If you can control yourself…”

Illyria crooked her head to the side, “I am a God who walked this earth before your kind even existed. What makes you think there is anything I cannot control?”

“Then did you mean to do to Jenny, what you did? Because seeing her mother again, seeing her like that? That was cruel. And I have never known you to be cruel, not like that.”

“It was not my intention,” Illyria said slowly.

“I cannot allow that to happen again,” said Angel, “I will not allow it to happen again. Understood?”

“I understand,” Illyria looked down at the books, and then to Angel, “Jenny…the child, what is she like?”

“She’s brilliant,” Angel said, “just like her mother. She’s smart, she’s kind, she’s curious, she’s brave… she’s…come so very far from where we took her from. And she’ll go farther.”

Illyria nodded.

 “She is in danger.”

Angel raised an eyebrow, “Did you hear about a threat?”

“No,” Illyria said, “but I know you. The enemies you have made, the battles you fight. Understand if you ever fail to protect her, if you allow her to be harmed, I will end you in ways you do not even have concepts for.”

Angel threw his head back and laughed bitterly.

“I see nothing amusing in this, half breed.”

“Illyria, if anyone ever harms Jenny, it will be because we’re all already dead,” Angel explained, “do you think that there is anyone on my team who doesn’t value her life, the life of any child, over theirs?”

Illyria said nothing.

“I need some time to sort this all out,” Angel said, “go to Spike’s place, and we’ll… figure something out. Maybe get you a damn cell-phone. Just…just give us some time, okay? Please, I know this is complicated, and tonight has been confusing, but I don’t want to lose you, Illyria.”

“That would be acceptable,” Illyria said.

oooOOooo

_Later_

“Darla left me alone in a burning barn while we were being hunted by Holtz. My soul-mate sent me to hell for a hundred years, Buffy died and I wasn’t there to help her, my infant child was kidnapped by my best friend and then taken by my worst enemy to a hell dimension and later, my son sent me to the bottom of the ocean for three months.”

Angel threw back the shot. It burned as it slid down his throat.

“So understand that when I say that today is the worst day of my life, I have no shortage of colorful days to choose from.”

“I feel ya there, bucko,” Lorne poured himself a shot from the bottle. It was a special brew, worth thousands of dollars, known as ‘The Perfect Poison’. The exact properties were an ancient secret, and allowed vampire, demon and human to become equally drunk without worrying about pesky things like alcohol poisoning, “I’d give my horns, bar and everything in between to avoid this, if we could have. But lets be honest, we knew this day was going to happen eventually.”

“Doesn’t make it any easier,” Angel sighed. He motioned for Lorne to pour another shot, “and I don’t know where we go from here.”

Faith smacked Angel upside the back of the head.

“Where do you think we go? We move forward, simple as that,” Faith popped a coke, “and hey, we don’t have some huge ass lie hanging over us anymore.”

“Sure you don’t want some?” Lorne slid the bottle towards Faith.

“More than anything,” Faith sighed, but she returned the bottle, “but I got a bad family history there, Kermit. Best to only get shit faced when I’m happy. Or bored. Or horny, or…”

“Yeah, I get it.”

“Ladies, Lorne,” Spike strolled in, and fell into a chair besides Angel, “let me get a drink then you can go to town on me, okay mate?”

“What? Oh, right,” Angel glanced at Spike, then remembered that for the last week, keeping Illyria away from the Hyperion was his job. In all the drama, he’d completely forgotten that up until now, “if that would solve anything, I would. But honestly, I’d rather get drunk than think about how we’ve been lying to one of our friends and a child in our care for months on end, and would have done it forever if we could have gotten away with it.”

“Can’t even get a sucker punch from you, eh?” Spike shook his head, “that bad, eh?”

“What do you think?”

“Things didn’t go well,” Spike poured himself a shot, “understatement of the year, or century?”

“Century,” Angel and Faith said together.

Spike took a good look at Faith, and did a double take.

“I’ll say. You get that from our girl?”

“’Fraid so,” Faith said, “she’s got a mean swing.”

“And you let her hit you,” Angel growled softly.

Faith shrugged, “Yeah, pretty much.”

“Why the hell did you go and do something like that!” Spike snapped, “you think this all isn’t hard enough on Jenny as is?!”

“It was either let her hit me, or the girl with the scary genius IQ grabs a magic book and things get ugly and unpredictable,” Faith replied, “I’ll take the mace for a hundred, Alec.”

“We could have stopped it,” Angel said.

“Yeah, right,” Faith said, “she’s smarter than you are old and violence is a part of her life, our lives. Best we control where she screws up now so she doesn’t screw up bigger later. Kinda an expert on that, Angel.”

“On violence, or screwing up?”

“Yes.”

“Jenny will be fine, right?” Lorne poured one for himself.

Angel said nothing.

“I mean, sure, Illyria is…she…” Lorne’s voice trailed off, “…I got nothin’.”

“She’s in Fred’s dead body,” Angel said bitterly, “there’s no getting around that. It’s why we can’t even tell her parents that she’s gone.”

“Not like we can throw stones there, mind,” said Spike.

“But you’re still you, Spike, Illyria isn’t Fred, and Jenny’s not you,” Faith said, “I gotta admit, seeing my dead mom’s body walking around would mess me up too. And I hated that bitch.”

“We never even held a service,” Lorne said softly, “too busy trying to save her, or dealing with her death that the actual details just slipped past us….”

“I told Illyria that Knox was worth defending, worth more as a person than her,” Angel said, “I’m surprised Wes didn’t shoot me too. And damn did she prove me wrong…”

“Like a bull in a China shop, though,” Spike took a deep drink from the bottle, “if the bull was wearing the dead body of a friend she had no right to, the china was innocent people around her…”

“I have to say,” Lorne took the bottle from Spike, “that’s what I hate most about big blue sometimes, the fact that I can’t hate her for what happened. Wasn’t her that put Fred in that room.”

“Why is this so complicated? I just want to save the world,” Angel sighed as he took another shot, and rested his head against the glass like it was ice on a wound.

“It’ll work out, Angel,” Faith said, “kids can be pretty damn mercenary, when ya think about it. Shit, I remember what I did for three hots and a cot. Jenny’ll come back to us because she needs us.”

“I’d rather she do it because she wants to be with us,” Angel said, “because she loves us like we love her.”

Faith shrugged, “That’ll follow. I hope.”

oooOOooo

_Elsewhere_

“…where?”

Dean Titus opened his eyes slowly, as he slowly returned to the land of the living. Well, as a vampire, not exactly living, but of the conscious.

The last thing he remembered was stalking his latest prey, a single mother of two, when something smashed him from behind and then…here.

Here being some cave under LA. Dean could hear the rumble of commuter tracks, the hum of electricity and stench of prey, but they were a ways off. The place was lit by candles, the walls covered in strange writings, four burned spinal cords hanging from the ceiling decorated with tensile and some blue haired woman staring right at him.

“Whoa!” Dean jumped, and realized that if he hoped to make it as a vampire, he’d have to be a little more observant.

“Umm, hello?”

Illyria said nothing.

“Did you uhh, knock me out?”

Illyria said nothing.

“Okay, screw this, you…you smurf!”

Dean put his game face on, lunged for Illyria but in the mere blink of an eye found himself flying in the opposite direction against an unforgiving stone wall.  

“You are not here to feed, half breed,” Illyria said.

“Oh, okay…” Dean drawled slowly. He picked himself up carefully, his body feeling like a giant bruise, “then why am I here?”

“To help me,” Illyria said, “you should consider this a great honor.”

“Help you?” Dean smiled despite himself. People just assumed that because you were a vampire, you knew all about the seamy, mystic underworld, but in truth Dead knew only jack and a little shit. The vampire that spawned him was staked only hours after Dean awoke, and he was left to fend for himself, “help you how?”

“To understand,” Illyria said.

“Umm, okay,” Dean scratched the back of his head, “so why choose me? Was it because of my work? I have to admit, it’s pretty clever.”

“Your ‘work’?” Illyria gave Dean a piercing look.

“Yeah, you heard about it, right? See, you know how some vampires will just eat a human and forget about it?”

“Yes,” Illyria said without judgment.

“See, that’s stupid! Because humans always have someone who cares about them! Someone that’ll be all ‘Oh, I must avenge this poor idiot who walked down a blind alley and expected to keep all her blood!’,” Dean smirked, “see, that’ll never happen to me. Because I’m smart. I see prey, I track it. I find out all it’s relations, and then, bam! I take ‘em all!”

“You kill entire families,” Illyria surmised.

“Well, yeah, a couple,” Dean said, “I mean, sure, I get a little hungry sometimes, but better safe than sorry, right? No Bruce Waynes to be found! That’s why you chose me, right?”

“I chose you at random,” Illyria said.

Dean watched her pick up a piece of metal rebar.

“But I still chose well.”

The rebar flew like an arrow, tearing through bone and pinning Dean to the cavern wall like an insect. Illyria took a moment to savor the image.

“…what? Why?” Dean looked at the metal protruding from his shoulder, and screamed as Illyria gave him a matching set.

“I find myself…conflicted, like a disgusting human,” Illyria said, “I thought this world held nothing but grief, pain. Another told me that there was love. I feel both now. And I do not know how to reconcile them in me.”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for you,” Dean pleaded, tears trickling down his face, “please, please don’t kill me!”

Illyria stepped in close to the vampire, “I have no intention of killing you, half breed.”

Illyria grabbed the collar of Dean’s shirt, and tore it free.

“As I stated, I intend to honor you.”

“Oh? Really?” Dean tried his best to smile, despite the fact that he had two metal poles through his shoulders, pinning him to the cavern wall.

Hope springs infernal, after all.

“Yes, a holy position just below my Qwa'ha Xahn,” Illyria said, “I have ordained you as my Qwr’hertan.”

“Is that like head harem boy?” Dean said hopefully, trying to ignore the stabbing pain in his shoulders.

“There is no true human translation,” Illyria ran her hand over Dean’s chest, gently. She held a hand over Dean’s ribs, and pushed. The young vampire screamed as Illyria’s hand plowed into him until it reached his now useless lungs.

Illyria removed her hand, now slick with blood, and allowed Dean to regain his composure. It took him a while to stop screaming. But Illyria was patient.

“The closest is ‘whipping boy’.”

Dean struggled to steady himself, “…why?”

“As I find myself torn with grief and anger, I feel as if I must be punished,” Illyria explained, “but I am a God king. No one, not even myself, can be allowed to damage me with impunity. You are my proxy.”

“Please, you can’t…”

“I can, half breed,” Illyria picked up a jagged piece of glass, “this shell had a theory that your kind do not truly subsist on blood. Rather, you received power from another dimension and blood is simply a catalyst that allows you strength and rational thinking. This theory is supported by the fact that one of you survived for three months without blood.”

Illyria dragged the shard of glass across the vampire’s chest.

“Take heart in that you are assisting a God to your kind. This will only last until I have come to fully understand these emotions. I predict it will only take a generation.”       

oooOOooo

Jenny returned home a week later. There wasn’t much discussion, just a few gentle words, and life returned to what constituted normal. The subject of Illyria was handled like a live grenade, only approached in life or death situations (and there were no shortage of those).

Jenny controlled her temper at those times, and only even looked at Illyria when she had to. And every time Jenny saw Illyria, without fail, she had a notebook she would always write in. It was always a different one, and whenever anyone was able to steal a glance at it, all they saw were equations that they could never hope to understand.

It would be a decade and a half before Jenny employed the notebooks, and the result was at best described as tragic.

 


	9. Tacos

Note: This chapter will be both upsetting and disgusting. You’ve been warned

oooOOooo

Angel learned the hardest lesson about raising Jenny because, of all things, tacos. It was something he knew not so deep down, but was thrown in his face by a reality that would not be denied.

Despite all the weirdness that surrounded his life, their life now, Angel did everything he could to at least have a semi normal dinner once a week, sitting at a dinner table with forks and knives and all that jazz. It was for him as much as Jenny, to convince himself that he was doing right by both the little girl and her mother.

Jenny, of course, didn’t complain. It was something that worried Angel at times, but not now. Food was food, right?

Angel ordered from an all night taco place, and set the table. He called Jenny down, and for a moment, he almost felt normal.

But then the little girl with lime green skin and horns on her forehead wrinkled her nose, and for the first ever when it came to food (or anything that could be mistaken for food), hesitated.

Her reluctance should have been a clue, Angel would later realize. Jenny never turned down food, and with her upbringing as a slave, he doubted she ever would. After a while, survival instincts just became hard wired.

And just like Fred, she had an appetite that defied physics.

But Angel, in his nostalgia, looked right past that, past Jenny and to Fred. Fred loved Mexican, therefore her daughter would too, right? That could be so wrong about giving them some small in common (besides the utter brilliance they shared)?

“What… is this?” asked Jenny.

“Just beef, cheese and some spices,” Angel said. He handed Jenny one, “come on, try it. It’s not so bad.”

Jenny handled the taco like it was radioactive, and only managed a bite and a half before she threw up.

It wasn’t just that she threw up until her entire stomach was empty, and from there went to dry heaves. Jenny broke out into wracking sobs and when she tried to stand her legs gave out. And when Angel rushed to her side, Jenny pulled away as if the mere sight of him was too much to bear.

And it gets worse.

It lasts for three days. Three days when Jenny can barely speak without crying. Three days where she can barely eat. Three days huddled in bed, and nothing was able to coax her to stop, to talk, except an exhausted sleep. Three days terrified that the people she loved would find out her secret.

It didn’t matter that they took twenty four hour vigils outside her room. Gunn, then Spike, then Connor, then Faith, then Lorne, then Kate, then Angel and back around again.

And as bad as the others think it is, Angel knows it’s worse. Jenny was a slave, and slaves don’t get sick days. There is no rest even for an infection, broken bone or pulled muscle. And certainly no bereavement leave.

That Jenny was so distraught that it overpowered her basic survival instincts worried Angel for every minute of those three terrible days. He almost thought the tacos were cursed somehow (and when not on ‘Jenny watch’, actually went so far as to confirm they weren’t). 

At the end of the third day, Jenny finally allows herself a thread of hope that maybe, just maybe they’d understand.

She asks for Faith and Angel, because she sees them as her biggest supporters, the people who care about her the most. 

But when she’s finally sitting across from her two guardians, her eyes red from tears, Jenny does everything she can not to look at them, until Faith cupped her chin and brought her up to eye level.

“Sweetie, remember what I first told you?”

Jenny nodded.

“Then trust us. We love you, and nothing will change that.”

Jenny swallowed hard, “You can’t know that.”

“Yes I do, kiddo. But give it a shot.”

“I…”

“Jenny, whatever it is you’re carrying, let us help,” said Angel.

“I can’t!” Jenny squeezed her eyes shut, “I tell you and you’d kill me and you’d be right!”

“Jenny, why would ever think…”

“Because you kill monsters!” Jenny screamed, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“You’re too small and cute to be a monster,” Faith said in a forced, nonchalant manner.

“Whatever is wrong,” Angel said, “whatever happened, please Jenny, let us help.”

“That thing …” Jenny has her hands on her knees, and trembled as if she were freezing to death, “…it reminded me of…of Bach-nal.”

Jenny looked at her guardians. Faith was confused, but the look of horror on Angel’s face meant that he understood. She didn’t know it, but as fate would have it, it was how he first met her mother.

Jenny almost stopped there, until she felt Faith’s hand on her shoulder. So she continued.

It started a week after Jenny was torn away from her mother, and sold at the market.

Her new owner saw himself as a kind and benevolent master (no one else did), but at the same time, felt that to spare the whip was to spoil the cow.

So when the new slaves were brought in, they were lined up in a row next to one another. Their new master then had an older slave, a man in his fifties marched out and had his throat cut without any ceremony.

Jenny and her fellow slaves watched as he was then hung from a tree by his wrists, and an ugly large, ritual metal bowl placed underneath. Then, without another word, they are led to their barracks.

Then, for the next week, Jenny and every new slave barely received half rations, but still did the same work as everyone else. By the fourth day, she’s grown accustomed to being able to see her own ribs and the dull, falling ache in her gut.

Then, on the seventh day, all the new slaves are taken from their barracks, stood in front of the still hanging and rotting corpse. They stood there for an hour, in the overpowering stench and surrounded by flies and birds picking at the carrion, before their new master came out and handed them all, including Jenny, a machete.

 To her, then, their new master is a looming giant, a towering mountain of authority and power. It was only later that Jenny recognized him as a fat, short slob of a man.

She and her fellow slaves look at the blades, terrified. It was a test of their submission, a test they all feared failing with so much as the wrong twitch. And a demonstration of their master’s power, that he would so boldly stand there in the midst of armed slaves.

“Please loosen the meat,” he ordered.

And they obeyed. After a week with two suns bearing down on it, the muscle and tissue slid off the old man’s bones effortlessly and fell like wet clay.

After the majority of the old man was in the bowl, Jenny and her fellow slaves were disarmed and sent back to the barracks.

Then, two days follow without food. And none of the other slaves offer them a crumb, or can even look them in the eye.

At the end of the second day, the guards enter with a steaming pile of meat, inside of a large, ugly ritual metal bowl and summon them forward.

“I bring you this gift,” said their owner, with a greasy smile, “to foster an understanding between us. Bach-nal is an important ritual for us, and I feel it would be selfish of me if I did not allow you, the newest additions to our family, to share in it.”

Jenny felt numb as she and the others were pushed to the bowl. The shock of what they were being forced to do was simply too much for the little girl who’d been torn away from her mother, torn away from the only person she ever thought would love her.

She could barely move, barely think, until the whip came down on her back, ripping flesh like it was paper. Jenny fell to her knees, and the smell of the meat washed over her. It didn’t smell anything at all rotten or spoiled or dead at all. It smelled cooked, fresh, spiced.

The most disgusting and horrible thing of all, was that it smelled _good_.

Jenny only lasted three more strikes of the lash before she finally gave in.

When it was all over, when her stomach didn’t ache and her back burned as it trickled blood, their master makes eye contact with each and every one of them. And Jenny sees that smug, knowing look in his face that haunts her nightmare.

Because she knows he will never let them forget this. And she knows no one will rebel now, because they could never muster the self respect, the basic dignity, to fight back, or the courage to defy him after being brought so low.

Later, when her fellow slaves are tending to their wounds, Jenny heard them say that it was all a trick, that it was just some spiced lizard. And they try to sound convinced.

But Jenny knows the truth doesn’t matter. Because she remembers exactly what was going through her head when she picked up the first handful of meat and put it in her mouth.

“I was hungry,” Jenny said through the sobs, “I was hungry and it hurt so bad and I didn’t want to die! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! Please please please don’t hate me!”

Both Angel and Faith do nothing to fight the tears. But, inside, they react very differently.

Angel, in a calm, understanding but firm voice, explains that it wasn’t her who did anything wrong. That she did what she had to to survive and that she is still a good person, an innocent victim of a monster. That it does not change their love for her.

Faith, in an acting performance worthy of an Oscar, pretended as if she hadn’t really heard a thing Jenny said. Because if she had heard it, and she didn’t, she couldn’t, Faith feared the seething rage she knew would overtake her would be sensed by Jenny and that simply could not be allowed to happen.

They embraced Jenny, until she knew beyond all doubt that they still loved her and that they would never, ever turn her out.

By the time she fell asleep in Faith’s arms, Jenny felt as if a terrible weight had been lifted from her shoulders, while Faith and Angel felt as if it had rolled over them.

“Every day, I want to burn that dimension to the ground more,” Faith rubbed her sore neck, “also, why would a taco make her freak like that?”

 “It was just the smell and taste, probably,” Angel sighed, “When it comes to memory, it can be a hell of a trigger. After I received my soul, I couldn’t eat red meat for decades. It didn’t taste like human flesh, not really, but…”

“But close enough,” Faith nodded, “okay, future note, no Mexican food. Ever.”

“Yeah,” Angel shook his head, “look, why don’t you head to bed? I’m going to go on patrol, work off some steam.”

“Head to bed? What am I, twelve? Why do you get to punch someone and I don’t?” Faith huffed.

“I’ll let you take the next three patrols,” said Angel, “please, Faith. I need this. I just need to get out tonight.”

“Oh lord,” Faith rubbed the bridge of her nose, “fine, but Angel? I know I can’t keep you from angsting, it might as well be your superpower besides the whole vampire thing, but it was just, ya know, tacos. You couldn’t have known.”

Angel was silent.

“And, as hard as this was, maybe it was a good thing? Now that Jenny’s got that off her chest, she might open up more.”

Silence.

“Just…think about what I said when you’re brutally killing something undead, okay?”

“Okay,” Angel said finally.

Faith didn’t need to be a mind reader to see that Angel was mostly humoring her, but she was so emotionally spent, Faith just couldn’t bring herself to care. He was a grown vampire, after all. And really, Faith could not remember a time when she needed a cigarette more.

She fished one out of her pocket, but when she attempted to actually light the damn thing, Faith noticed that her hands were trembling so much that she had a better likelihood of setting her hair on fire than actually lighting her cancer stick.

That was when a hand reached out with a lighter, “Need a hand there, luv?”

Faith had a stake in hand before she even realized she recognized the bleach blond, leather clad vampire standing next to her.

“Jesus fuck, Spike!” Faith put her hand on her chest, trying to slow her pounding heart, “don’t sneak up on a girl like that!”

“Sneak up? Bloody hell, I just came in the side door,” Spike said, “you want I should wear a damn bell around my neck?”

“Just hold the damn lighter,” Faith muttered. Once lit, Faith inhaled all the smoke her lungs could take, and damn did it feel good. To hell with the Surgeon General, whoever that stuck up prick was, this really was the best medicine.

“Better?”

“Little,” Faith sucked in more, “lets take this outside. Jenny hates the smell, and Angel gets whiney too.”

To his credit, Spike waited for Faith to finish her first smoke before saying a word.

“So, how’s our girl?” Spike lit another one for Faith, who’s hands were still shaking (but not as badly as before), before lighting one for himself.

“We got to the bottom of it,” said Faith, “and holy crap was it somethin’. I’m beginning to be thankful that all my folks did was slap me around and not feed me. And just how messed up is that?”

“Anything you care to share?” Spike said softly.

“What, you running a gossip rag or something?” Faith said, more on instinct than actual malice.

“Hey, have I ever once been unreliable when it comes to that girl?” Spike snapped, “I did my duty out there, and here, without one word of complaint! I deserve some respect there, you bloody cow!”

Faith scowled, mainly because it was true. Sure, Spike went to chase Buffy’s tail a couple of times, but he made damn sure to keep Faith and Angel in the loop and made it clear in no uncertain terms that if Jenny needed him, he’d come running.

In the end, Spike, who threw himself into any fight simply because it was a fight, bent over backwards to be just as reliable as Angel and Faith when it came to Jenny.

“B was right,” Faith forced herself to chuckle, “you really do love playing the big brother bit, don’t ya?”

“It’s not playing,” Spike said, “though yeah, innocent kid caught up in business they never asked to be in? Don’t know how not to care, truth to tell.”

“Yeah, I can imagine,” Faith sucked in more nicotine.

“So, getting back to the proper subject, Jenny. How bad?”

“On a scale of one to ten?”

“Eleven, right?” Spike shook his head, “it’s never one. Or two, why is that?”

“Because we pissed off God or somethin’, best I can figure.”

“Well, care to share?” Spike said

Faith examined her shoes. She knew the depth of Spike’s love for Jenny. At first, he cared about that little girl first because she was Fred’s daughter. He cared about her now simply because she was Jenny Burkle. He cared about her because he was Spike and when he cared, he threw himself into the deep-end, headfirst.

“No,” Faith said with a heavy sigh. They said the truth will set you free, but Faith could almost feel the chains around her now.

“What? Come on now, I can bloody well keep a secret.”

“I know, Spike,” Faith said, “Ain’t that I don’t trust you when it comes to Jenny, but it’s not my secret to tell, and Jenny didn’t come to you. You feel me?”

Spike rubbed his temple, “Yeah. Hate it, but yeah. Anything I can do, at least?”

“Yeah, only thing the rest of us can do,” Faith said, “love her, protect her and never ever bring Mexican food here, like, ever.”

“Mexican, eh?  Was her mum’s favorite.”

“Well, like I said, God hates us.”

oooOOooo

Angel stalked towards the door, when he caught a whiff of Mexican. He remembered that the remains of the dinner had been tossed in the trash, but trash pick-up was still a day away.

Rather than risk even the possibility of upsetting Jenny again, Angel pulled the bags out, and walked a good six blocks, ignoring the odd glances that people gave him (Angel, savior of Los Angeles a trashman?), before he finally dumped it all in an open dumpster in a back alley so far away it might as well be on the moon.

He closed the lid, then smashed his fist into the rusted steel, slammed his foot and generally just used every ounce of his vampire strength to turn the dumpster into a thing of bent and twisted metal. It wasn’t until his hands were broken and he doubled over from exhaustion that Angel finally stopped.

Faith was wrong, it wasn’t ‘just tacos’.

It was him. It was Angel pretending that Jenny wasn’t Jenny, but Fred reborn. He’d hurt a young girl because he allowed himself, for just a moment, to see her as a pet, a trinket reminder of a dearly beloved friend.

And in the end, he’d wronged both Fred and Jenny. To Fred, for not protecting her daughter, and to Jenny for treating her like pet, like a reflection of her mother, like a _thing_ when she was her own person, actual and whole.

Jenny wasn’t Fred. She never would be, and Angel knew he hurt her by trying to force her to be, instead of embracing her as her own complete person.

 “I’m sorry,” he said, to Fred and Jenny both.

 


	10. Faith

Faith

When Spike, Gunn or anyone who know them think about Jenny and her life, Faith is always the one who makes them think twice. Only a few understand why Jenny clings to the last ‘Chosen One’ was strongly as she does.

Those few that see it, however, understand the relationship perfectly.

Faith makes Jenny believe.

While most children grow up believing that their parents are a force of nature, able to handle anything life threw at them, Jenny never had that illusion. She never knew her father, never wanted to, and her mother struggled with the weight of the world on the good days, and there were oh so few of those.

When Jenny was taken from her mother, she wanted to cry out, to beg her mother to save her, but she said nothing. Jenny saw her mother reach for her, saw the other slaves tackle her and said nothing. Because even at such a tender age, Jenny knew that there was nothing her mother could do for her. And Jenny knew that all she could do was to remain silent, because otherwise she’d scream and beg and then would be just one more thing that tore her mother’s heart apart.

And when her second master brings her low, Jenny slowly loses her belief in everything.

She lost the ability to believe she deserved freedom when she gave into the Bach-nal ritual.

She lost the ability to believe in family when she sang,  shared the gift her mother gave her and they still looked at her like trash, still spit on her rations and tell the Overseers she’s always the one making trouble.

She lost the ability to believe she’s anything but property when she’s sold again.

When her group was marched to the market, Jenny barely reacted to the portal that opened up beneath them. She had long since resigned herself to whatever terrible fate was in store for her. Jenny didn’t want to die, but that didn’t mean she cared much about living.

Arriving in Silver Lake, being found and sheltered by Lorne, none of it makes Jenny believe in the possibility of a better life. Because no matter how much Lorne smiled, no matter how much he dotes on her, all Jenny is able to see all the others just like him, like her, green and full of authority and all their smiles mean is a prelude to creative cruelty.

That never happened with Lorne, in Hell or afterwards, but survival instincts die hard.

Angel brought out a small flicker of hope when they first meet, with his compassion and understanding as he looks at her and sees everything, but Jenny forces it all from her mind when she ends up in Pylea again.

It’s only when Faith reaches out to her, when Faith assures that she can be redeemed, that Jenny starts truly to believe in something better.

But that hope, was itself terrifying. Because Jenny can only see herself as a survivor. She quickly comes to understand that these people might love her, but only because they loved her mother.

And with her dead, how long would it take their affection to fade?

Jenny had cynicism down to an art form, after all.

A few days after they return to earth, Faith unknowingly endears herself to Jenny when she overhears that Faith barely knew Fred, her mother.

 “Shame I never really got to meet Fred,” Faith said in an offhand manner, when she thought Jenny wasn’t listening.

There was more to the conversation, but that was all Jenny remembered

It was like a spark inside of Jenny’s heart. Because Faith loved her for _her_.

It made Jenny believe that there would be others, it made Jenny believe that Spike, Lorne and the rest really did love her, separate of her mother. And that spark eventually became a warm fire that Jenny carried with her for the rest of her life, and she would always remember where it started.

More than just that, Faith made Jenny believe that she was would always be safe.

Angel and Spike were flammable during half of the day. Lorne wasn’t a fighter, and Gunn and Kate were only human, despite their combat prowess.

But Faith? She was stronger than Angel and Spike, doesn’t burn at the touch of sunlight, doesn’t give a damn about crosses and doesn’t need an invitation anywhere. And when Faith fights, she fights with a passion and strength had seemed unbreakable. Faith gave everything in battle, and when Jenny sees that fire being used to protect her, it gives Jenny a source of strength and confidence that holds her fears at bay.

There are times when Faith’s strength is tested, but to Jenny, she never breaks. Like when she returns from Pylea, bloody but standing tall. Like when Faith rescued Jenny and her classmates from a rogue slayer and a pack of vampires.

Jenny knows there is no battle Faith won’t wage for her, and it’s a comfort even in times when violence can solve a damn thing.

Like when Jenny had to leave LA, and spend a year at the Watcher’s Academy.

Like when Jenny meets her grand-parents for the first time.

 Like when Jenny had to attend High School for four terrible and awesome years.

 On occasion, people wonder why Jenny only ever calls Faith ‘mom’ to annoy her. It’s because to her, to Jenny, Faith is so much more than that.

Because Faith’s love, her protection, uplifted the little girl who’d been born a slave, treated as a thing by all but one and enabled her to just believe in something more. Faith took the weight of the world off Jenny’s shoulders without batting an eye.

Because to Jenny, Faith isn’t her mom. No matter how much she loves her mother, to Jenny ‘mom’ is a weak word. She never blames Fred for being unable to protect her, but she can’t ignore it either. Unfortunately, Jenny is too smart for that. She’s too smart, and too cynical, to see ‘Dad’ as a strong word either. Not when sunlight and holy water can do so much.

To Jenny Burkle, Faith is simply in a league all her own. To her, Faith really is faith.


	11. Social Science

Gunn often worried that he didn’t feel as guilty around Jenny as he really should.

A part of him would always hold himself responsible for Fred’s death. It was a weight Gunn felt every day, one he was certain he’d carry with him to the grave and beyond. And Gunn felt a small amount of guilt that he wasn’t able to help Fred deal her time in Pylea, and maybe they might have found Jenny, might have reunited mother and daughter.

But Jenny was just too sweet a child, in her own special way, and when she was engaged, so full of energy that it was hard not to get swept up in it as well.

And there was always Angel and his over-protectiveness to make up for any lack of angst.

“So you’re teaching her to hustle pool now?”

Gunn smiled weakly, “Nah, it’s nothing like that. It’s just applied physics, it’s good for her.”

“She tell you to say that?”

“No,” Gunn tried not to look too obvious, “come on, Angel, ain’t like she’s playing for money. Just a few candy bars, a gift certificate and some fun.”

“A gift certificate can act as money!” whispered a young voice.

“Hey girl, I got this,” Gunn said in a stage whisper.

“Do you?” Angel said.

“Fine, fine,” Gunn put his hand up defensively, “you be the one to tell the legendary green machine she can’t play in the finals.”

“Make me the bad guy, classic,” Angel sighed as he rubbed his temple.

“Well hey, you are the one with experience there, boss man.”

“Fine, fine,” Angel rubbed his forehead, “take her to the shelter. And take Faith, she needs the air.”

“Yes!”

oooOOooo

Jenny stopped Gunn before they entered.

“Gunn?”

“What, need me to play human shield again?”

Jenny nodded, “Sorry, it’s just that the acoustics are unique in how they’re being reflected around the game room, and my hearing is at least two hundred percent better than humans so it gets really loud and hard to focus and…”

“Hey, no need to explain it to me again,” Gunn replied. He ignored Faith’s snort.

“Your big bald head absorbs radar,” Faith said.

“Hey!”

“Actually, it’s his wider lower body and muscle mass,” Jenny explained, “but it doesn’t hurt.”

“Jenny!”

The young hybrid spun around when she heard Anne’s voice. She rushed up to the young woman and nearly tackled her in a hug. Gunn smiled as Anne returned the hug effortlessly.

Most people would look twice at a kid with green skin and horns, but not Anne. She never asked about it, not really. After dealing with vampires and zombies, all Anne saw in Jenny was a little girl that needed to play and interact with other kids.

And with Angel’s reputation, which got a boost during Hell A that never stopped, the kids saw Jenny like the daughter of a rock star. Just being in her presence was enough for some.     

“Anne!” Jenny stepped back, “is Oscar here yet? Can I go win yet?”

“He’s been waiting for you,” Anne replied, “go have some fun.”

“Have fun, sprout, I’m gonna stretch my legs,” Faith said.

“That’s not code for something nasty nearby, is it?” Anne whispered.

“Nah, Faith just wants a smoke,” Gunn replied.

“Hey, I can do both,” said Faith, “sometimes, I can even walk and chew gum at the same time.”

Jenny rushed inside, and grabbed her favorite pool stick, and the stool she needed to stand.

“Alright everybody, we have our returning champion ready to take on all comers!”

Jenny grabbed her pool cue, and let Oscar break.

“She’s a sweet kid,” Anne said.

“It runs in the family,” replied Gunn.

“So hey, just curious, you and Faith, you seeing each other?”

Gunn chuckled despite himself, “Faith? Nah. I mean, don’t get me wrong she’s fun to hang around, but she’s a little too intense to be around all the time, ya know?”

“Big bad man needs a teddy bear,” Anne teased, as Jenny lined up a shot, “I think she’ll miss.”

“Jenny, nah she’s a natural,” Gunn replied.

Anne took three steps aside, and Gunn watched in confusion as Jenny missed what he judged to be a relatively easy shot.

“Gunn, it’s too loud in here!” Jenny said, though to Gunn the place was actually pretty quiet. A few kids were watching Jenny and Oscar play, but by now everyone knew where this would end. Most were just hanging out or playing games on the TV, “move to your left two yards.”

“On it,” Gunn replied. He felt a little embarrassed, acting like a human shield and taking orders from a little girl, but he was more than willing to swallow a little pride for her.

“Funny meeting you here,” Anne smirked.

“Huh?” Gunn shrugged, “sorry, Jenny’s got sensitive ears and it helps when I stand in certain places.”

“Oh, of course,” Anne smirked. She then took another three steps aside, though Gunn didn’t notice. All he saw was Jenny missing what should have been another easy shot.

“Come on, Jen!” Gunn said, “don’t let this foo’ win!”

“Oh, I’m the sucker here?” Oscar smirked, “dream on, baldy.”

“Gunn, move to your left three feet!” Jenny snapped, and Gunn obeyed like a soldier responding to his drill sergeant.

“Hello again, Gunn,” Anne said. She crooked her head and looked at him with a goofy smile, “you just can’t leave me alone today, can you? If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear you were stalking me.”

“Huh?” Gunn gave Anne a look of confusion, “hey, don’t look at me. I’m just trying to make Jenny more comfortable.”

Anne giggled.

“It’s cute the way you’re wrapped around her finger, but Gunn? Maybe you should just take the hint before she tries to get too clever.”

“Clever about what?”

“Really? Gunn, you can not be that thick.”

“Wait, I missed something here,” Gunn said.

“No you didn’t!” Jenny shouted, as she leaned over the pool table to make another shot.

Gunn looked at Jenny, then to Anne, and then remembered the last week.

“Girl’s been playing you like a bad video game,” Oscar said.

“I’m free this Thursday,” Anne said.

“So is Gunn!” Jenny shouted, indifferent to how the kids around her were all snickering. To Gunn, it was like a series of dominos fell in his mind, how this was the only place Jenny ever needed him to act as a shield, and Anne always happened to be nearby.

“Hey, who am I to deny two pretty girls?” Gunn said with an embarrassed smile, “it’s a date.”

“Finally!” Jenny said with a loud, dramatic sigh, “now I can get my candy.”

“Whup him good, Jenny!”

oooOOooo

_Later_.  

“Faith! I kicked butt!”

Jenny skipped down the stairs, a small bag of candy bars in one hand.

“Knew you would,” Faith ruffled the young girl’s hair, “how’d Project Cueball go?”

“What, you were in on it too?” Gunn shook his head.

“Faith offered to help,” Jenny said, “she was the variable that delayed the project. Anne thought you were interested in her. But Faith offered to help when I told her about it.”

“Offered to break your legs, let Anne play nursemaid,” Faith said, completely nonchalant, “Jenny nixed it, though.”

“Thanks for that, kiddo.”

“It wouldn’t have worked,” Jenny said, while munching on a candy bar, “Anne’s too busy with the shelter, she wouldn’t have had any time to take care of you at all. And you wouldn’t be able to pay her. Faith says you have to buy dinner to impress mates here.”

“Is that the only reason why you wouldn’t let Faith hurt me?” Gunn looked at Jenny with a raised eyebrow.

“Pretty much,” Jenny said in all seriousness, “Connor said it the only way you’d take a vacation was if you broke a leg, and vacations are awesome! You aren’t expected to work at all! What’s better than that?”

“Not much,” Gunn chuckled.

Yeah, Jenny was sweet, and definitely special.

 


	12. Action Science!

Math

Eric Holden set down his Barret M82 on the cavern floor, and began preparing for his assignment. He opened his laptop, and waited patiently for his customized, ten thousand dollar program to start.

It took a few minutes, but Eric was patient. Soon, the screen displayed the local weather, wind speed and humidity of a world a reality away. Eric studied the information for ten straight minutes, before he was satisfied that he was ready.

Eric reached into his knapsack, and removed an old leather and flesh bound tome created some five hundred years ago. He’d dog-eared the page he needed, and flipped the book open. In his own mind, he began reciting the Latin for the incantation he wanted.

-click!-

“Wow,” said a new, feminine voice, “I know it’s wrong, but damn I am impressed by this set-up. I never expected to find something this sophisticated, but I really should have.”

Eric did his best to keep the shock from his body language, but his mind was running in a panic. How had someone managed to sneak up on him?

“Close the book, stand up and turn around. No sudden moves.”

Eric did as he was told, and when he turned around it all made sense.

The woman standing behind him, weapon drawn, wore the standard black suit and tie that had characterized Federal agents for decades now. But her skin was a light green, she had a slightly stocky build and small horns on her forehead.

“Agent Jenny Burkle, correct?”

“You know, it used to be cool when perps knew my name. Now it just makes me feel like I’m on a bad cop show,” Jenny said. She kept her Desert Eagle, standard issue for her agency, trained in Eric’s chest.

“Well, it’s not like there are that many green skinned agent slash scientists, even if your adopted father weren’t so famous,” replied Eric, “this may be a little awkward, but I’m kind of a fan of yours. I’ve read all your papers.”

“Really?” Jenny blushed, “which was your favorite? I mean, not that I care what with you being a hired gun and bad guy, of course.”

“The paper in which you proved your mom’s string theory in relation to inter-dimensional travel,” said Eric, “to be honest, I only understood a little of it, but I thought it was heartwarming how you wrote it for your mom. What’s the point of science without a purpose?”  

“I know!” Jenny sighed dramatically, though she kept her weapon level, “you know I had to threaten to pull the article entirely? I’m like one of the foremost experts on magic and they’re all like ‘This is science, not poetry’, stupid jerks!”

“Science can be both, I find,” said Eric.

“Oh, I agree,” Jenny said, “anyways, ego stroking is over. We both have places to be. You in a dark cell, me having dinner with friends.”

“You realize that you technically have no authority here, right?”

“There’s no authority here, period,” Jenny replied, “so that means I don’t need to ask permission to kick your ass back to our home reality.”

“So how did you find me?” Eric listened carefully and his eyes darted around.

“Wasn’t easy,” Jenny said, “it took me a few days to realize that you were sniping from another dimension. You really baffled the crime scene re-constructionists, there. It wasn’t until they sent the bullet fragments to our department and I noticed the odd radioactive half-life that it even occurred to us you were on another plane.”

“How did you narrow it down to this dimension? There are hundreds…”

Jenny shrugged, “I was able to use the radiation to narrow the possible realities to five. Only two had an earth like atmosphere. I figured you needed a planet as close to home for an easier shot, and only this one was uninhabited, which saves on distractions.”

“Still, this is an entire world,” Eric said, “how did you find my exact location out of thousands of possibilities?”

“You use a binding spirit on your laptop to another one back on earth, to monitor the weather near your target. It’s a creative way to breach the gulf between realities, but it also creates a radio signal you could track from halfway across the world with the right charm. I did the same thing to my cell phone when I was fourteen in case I had to hop dimensions,” Jenny said, “still, not a bad system you cobbled together.”

“Really? Honestly, I never thought what I was doing was all that creative. Any good sniper shoots from behind cover. I just took it a few extra steps.”

“Are you kidding? I’m not some idiot who doesn’t understand how snipers work. You’re not looking at someone through a scope, you have to take into the direction of the wind, the amount of humidity in the air, the rotation of the earth, hell when you pull the trigger I bet half the time your rifle isn’t even pointed at your target, but above it,” Jenny chuckled, “you kill people with math. Gotta respect the applied science warrior, even if it’s evil.”

“And you found me,” Eric said, “I have to respect that, even if it’s coming from a cop.”

“Thanks.”

“Though how did you sneak up on me?” asked Eric.

“I created an enchanted perfume that made me undetectable to scent and sound when I was fifteen,” Jenny explained, “I did it a week after realizing that having a vampire for a dad meant he could tell when I had sex, and a whole year and a half before I actually did the deed. It was for both our sakes.”

“I would agree,” said Eric, “one last question?”

“Sure.”

“How’d you know I was a vampire?”

“You’re a what what?”

Eric’s face changed into something primal, and Jenny squeezed the trigger twice before Eric smacked the gun from her hand and landed a right cross.

“Asshole!” Jenny swung her elbow into Eric’s face, and the vampire replied with a backhand.

Eric grabbed her tie, “I don’t know why you Feds always insist it wearing a rope on your neck.”

Eric pulled, but the tie snapped off effortlessly.

“Clip on,” Jenny took a step forward and landed her best right hook of the month, “they all are, idiot!”

“Hmm, some demon strength but not vampire strong, or slayer tough,” Eric chuckled, as he wiped some blood from his mouth, “you shouldn’t be so cocky.”

“Pot meet kettle,” Jenny reached into her coat and removed a cross.

“You’re well prepared,” Eric smiled, “but I told you, I’ve read your papers. I believe it was called ‘The united faith theory’? That’s just a symbol from another world, and means nothing here without the magic.”

“Magic, you fickle bitch,” Jenny dropped the cross, and drew her back-up weapon, a small, 22 snub nose revolver, “okay, you’ve had your fun. Get on your knees and hands on your head, now! You’re under arrest!”

“Are you kidding?” Eric chuckled, “I barely felt the Desert Eagle! That thing wouldn’t kill me even if I were human!”

“Are you refusing to stand down?”

“I am.”

Jenny smirked, “Good.”

She pulled the trigger with relish, and Eric couldn’t keep himself from screaming as the bullets pierced his flesh like burning arrows. Eric fell like a log at Jenny’s feet.

“The bullets are made of particle board,” Jenny removed a pair of specialized handcuffs, and slapped them on Eric’s wrists, “and soaked in a special poison that would disable all but two vampires. Did you think I’d be dumb enough to pull a weapon that wouldn’t work on you twice?”

The click of the handcuffs was the most satisfying sound Jenny had heard in the last month.

“You’re right, asshole. I’m not slayer strong, or vampire tough…”

Jenny pressed her knee against Eric’s back.

“…but I am Burkle smart.”

        


	13. New friend

Survivor

 

It was Lorne who approached Angel with the idea. That was why Angel made a point that he was there in his office, along with the Doctor as he gave them both his best thousand yard stare.

“So explain this to me again, Dr. Cross. Because it sounds to me like you want me use a little girl as a circus freak for the mentally ill. And you, Lorne, thought this was a good idea why?”

Lorne squirmed in his chair a little bit, and loosened his collar, “Angel hair, it’s not like that at all, see, the Doc here, he’s been canvassing the uhh…well, lets just say our side of the street looking for some volunteers for his clinic. Some nice, safe, demon volunteers.”

“You know the words nice, safe and demon usually don’t work together in a sentence, right?” said Angel.

“Well, yeah Angel Cake,” Lorne shrugged, “but not always. There’s me, Jenny of course, Clem and more than you’d expect, actually.”

“If I may?” Dr. Cross said, “Mr. Angel, please I don’t think you fully understand why I need your daughter. The idea is re-immersion therapy, which has been very successful in treating post traumatic syndrome. When LA was, well…umm…”

“Sent to hell,” Angel said, “that is why you’re treating them, is it not?”

“Yes, sorry. I apologize, Mr. Angel, it’s just that I’ve only recently come around to accepting the concept of magic,” Dr. Cross explained, “at any rate, millions were affected. Most seem to have simply written it off as a vivid dream. But there is a great number of whom who have not been able to do that, who remember everything, everything they saw and everything they did. And they need help.”

“How is exposing them to demons again defined as help?” asked Angel, “seems like putting gas on a fire, not putting it out.”

“It’s all in how it’s done,” Dr. Cross explained, “we re-expose them to in controlled, safe environments wherein they can feel safe. And while they are ‘there’ and with professional help we assist them in confronting the trauma they witnessed. It is far from painless and it’s not quick, but over time it does help people.”

“How sure are you that this therapy will work?” asked Angel.

Dr. Cross sighed, “I have no idea, honestly. It works well when dealing with post traumatic stress sufferers. But there really is no case study for what happened to my patients. The trauma is unprecedented. It’s like Wild Pig Syndrome in New Guinea, Zero Stroke in Germany or Artic Hysteria in well, Antarctica.”

“I’ve never heard of any of those,” said Angel, “I mean, I’ve heard of Antarctica and Germany, obviously, but…”

“That’s because they’re mental illnesses that happen in only one place in the entire world,” Dr. Cross said, “look, my patients aren’t violent, they’re sick and they need help. I’m scrambling around in the dark here, so no, I can’t promise it will work. But for the sake of my patients, I have to at least try.”

“Fine, fine,” Angel sighed, “I’ll go. I’ll do the bumpy head thing, no reason for Jenny to go.”

“Uhh, actually,” Dr. Cross winced, “that was my first thought, to recruit vampires since there seem to be so many, but Lorne explained to me that with the exception of two, yourself included, that all vampires are sociopathic killers and that they should never be invited anywhere ever.”

“Lorne…”

“Well, it’s not like he’s wrong, is he Angel buns?” Lorne said, “look, I know this doesn’t exactly sound like fun, but I think it’ll be a positive experience for our little girl.”

“It sounds like you want to use her like a circus freak, and I don’t think that…”

“I want to do it.”

Angel rubbed the bridge of his nose, gave Dr. Cross and Lorne a stern look, and then turned to Jenny.

“Jenny, what did I say about eavesdropping on my conversations?”

“I wasn’t,” Jenny said, eyes unable to meet his and her head barely raised. Angel wondered if she would ever be comfortable correcting an authority figure, “Faith asked me if I would like to do it. I researched the theory and cross referenced it with other respected doctors, well...not exactly respected because official institutions don’t recognize things like demons and vampires and write them off as hallucinations which we all know isn’t…”

“Jenny.”

“Oh, umm, I think it’s a good idea and I want to help,” Jenny summarized.

Angel glared at Lorne, “You went to Faith first?”

“Hey, I thought she’d be the hard sale,” Lorne shrugged, “who’d have thought that she would have been the reasonable one here?”

Angel rolled his eyes, “Dr. Cross, could you please leave your card? I’ll call you and let you know what we decide. Lorne, could you get Faith?”

“Thank you for your time,” Dr. Cross put his card down on the desk, and looked towards Jenny, “I hope to see you see soon.”

“Jenny, could I talk to you for a moment?”

Lorne cringed as he left the office. Angel’s ‘serious voice’ was never much fun to deal with, even when he was being gentle.

Jenny sat down across from Angel, and the vampire took a second to relax his posture, and shove down the annoyance, concern and flat out confusion he felt about all of this. He wanted to speak to Jenny as, well, not an equal exactly, but as her guardian and father figure and not a strict authority figure. He was keenly aware that he could order her not to go and she’d never ask about it again, but besides violating every ethical bone in his body, it wouldn’t address the actual issue.

“You know that Dr. Cross wants you to visit his clinic because you’re obviously…” Angel searched for the right word.

“Green?” Jenny suggested.

“Exactly,” Angel replied, even though it wasn’t the right word, “and that’s going to draw attention. You know that, right?”

Jenny opened her mouth to say something, but decided instead just to nod. Jenny wasn’t a shy child, Angel was quick to realize, but she was self conscious about how she stood out in a crowd all the same. It was only when people noticed her demon side, Jenny noticed it and them.

“So why do you want to do this, then?”

Jenny looked at the floor. Her eyes began to water, “My mother…she didn’t remember me. What if…there’s someone else out there…like me? Like her?”

Angel’s throat went dry.

“I could never help her,” Jenny replied. She wiped the tears away, “what if I could help them? Isn’t that what you do, help people? Why is that wrong?” 

“That’s…” Angel sighed in relief when he saw Lorne and Faith standing at the office threshold, “I’ll talk it over with Faith. Jenny, why don’t you show Lorne those transformers you made?”

“Oh! Oh! Oh!” Jenny leapt out of the chair, as if someone flipped a switch in her heart and she grabbed Lorne’s hand and began tugging at him, “I used the 3-D printer to make a working Rung and Rewind! It’s awesome!”

“Aww, like two peas in a pod,” Faith smirked, “you’d never know that she was actually scared of him for a while.”

“Faith, please take a seat,” Angel waved his hand at the chair, “lets chat.”

“Sure thing,” Faith stepped around Angel’s desk, and planted her rear on the corner of his desk, “what up?”

“Why did you agree to this clinic thing behind my back?”

“Well, I didn’t see your front at the time,” Faith replied, “much less back. Lorne came to me first, and I thought it would be good for her.”

“And who are you to make that choice?” Angel growled.

Faith did a double take, then glared daggers at the Vampire, “And who the hell are you to make any choices for that little girl, huh? I don’t see no adoption papers, no foster care agreement, none of that shit. Yeah, I didn’t know Fred. I get that. But I know Jenny, and I love the sprout. And you know what? She loves me. So don’t you dare try to pull that bullshit on me again, are we clear?”

“I’m sorry,” Angel raised his hands, conceding defeat, “you’re right, Faith, I’m sorry. That was too far.”

“Damn straight,” Faith stood up and walked back around the desk. She felt a little too tempted to smack Angel at the moment.

“So what made you think this was a good idea?”

Faith shrugged, “I asked her if she wanted to help. She thought about it, and said yes.”

“Faith, she’s just a kid,” said Angel, “do you really think she’s thought this all the way through?”

“I kinda do, actually,” Faith said, “lets face facts, she ain’t no normal kid. Green skin and horns aside, she knows what rape is but not sex, she’s seen her mom’s body walking around with someone else in it and she’s used to being treated like trash. And then there’s Fred.”

“What about her?” Angel tensed despite himself.

Faith knew she was on thin ice. Usually, that was when she felt the impulse to dance, but not here. Fred was their friend, their family, not hers, and that was something that demanded respect. Especially when it concerned Jenny.

“You guys say that she was messed up in the head after all that time in Pylea, right? That was her first real, ‘holy crap!’ experience with demons and shit, right?”

“Right,” Angel said, though it went unspoken that that was a vast understatement. For three whole months after returning to earth, Fred was barely able to leave her room. And it was even longer still for her to accept what happened as reality and not some unending fantasy.

“Well, how convincing do you think that sounds to a girl with lime green skin, living with a souled vampire, a slayer and all the rest, huh?” Faith asked, “look, I know you want to do the same thing all good fathers want to do, lock their daughters up in a perfect little world where nothing bad can happen. But we can’t do that.”

“Says who? You just need the right spell,” said Angel, “I’ve checked into it, actually.”

“Sometimes, you have a head as thick as your forehead,” Faith rolled her eyes, “my point, genius, is that she needs to see for herself what it’s like, how normal people react to the shit we handle every day. It’s the only way she’ll ever understand what Fred went through, what she was going through. You know it, I know it and no matter how many uncomfortable truths we try to hide from her, Jenny knows it too.”

“It’s just that…”, Angel struggled for the words.

“She’ll still love Fred,” Faith said softly.

“That shouldn’t matter,” Angel sighed.

“But it does,” Faith replied, “you guys loved her, and you want Jenny to love her too. There’s nothin’ selfish in wanting a kid to love her mom.”

“I have no right to pass judgment on Jenny’s feelings,” Angel said under his breath, “she’s a child, not a drone. And the moment I try to force her to feel the way I do, is the moment I fail Fred and Jenny both.”

“Oh, for God’s sake,” Faith rubbed the bridge of her nose, “stop over-thinking this, already. I still love my mom, she slapped me around, let me starve and all other crap I don’t wanna talk about. Fred ain’t got nothin’ on her, okay? Understanding what Fred was goin’ through won’t make Jenny love her any less. Just the opposite, probably.”  

Angel leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes.

“Fine, but keep an eye on her, okay? I don’t care how selfish it sounds, Jenny’s going to that clinic for her, not the patients.”

oooOOooo

“So doc, before we step into the heart of darkness here, mind telling me a few things?”

Faith, Jenny and Dr. Cross were in a small room, looking through a one way mirror, looking at the institution’s common area.

On the other side were roughly a dozen men and woman. Some moved as if they were sleep walking, a few sat on the floor rocking back and forth, while others sat unnaturally still. Each and every one of them had a detached, blank look in their eyes, as if they were looking across some great distance.

“Of course,” said Dr. Cross, “I’ll answer any questions that don’t violate patient confidentiality.”

“So why do you believe in magic and demons?” asked Faith, “don’t get me wrong, it’s all real and face-eaty. But in my experience, most people will bend over backwards to avoid actually admitting that.”

“That’s actually the very problem we have here,” Dr. Cross said with a heavy sigh, “but as for me personally? I suppose I started believing when I received over two dozen patients all describing roughly the same thing to me.”

“How do you know they didn’t all smoke some bad weed?” asked Faith.

“Well, besides the fact that none of them were addicts prior to contacting me and come from different backgrounds? The fact of the matter is that there is no such thing as uniform hallucinations,” Dr. Cross said, “if a drug makes someone hallucinate, well, what they see will always differ. Rats, a pink sky, but almost never the same thing. When I realized that was not the case with my patients, I decided to investigate. A nurse recommended your friend Lorne, and he was polite and patient enough to educate me.”

“You lucked out there, doc,” observed Faith, “usually when amateurs stumble into my world, it rarely ends well.”

“As I realize the enormity of what I’ve discovered, I must agree,” said Dr. Cross, “I believe in magic and demons and such, but I still have a long way to go before I’m entirely comfortable with it.”

“’Nother question,” Faith nodded to the patients on the other side of the glass, “what exactly is wrong with those people? They’re not violent, are they?”

“Not at all,” Dr. Cross said, “despite what you see on TV, mentally ill does not mean violent. As to what’s wrong with them, it’s…hard to explain.”

“Give it a shot, because I’m not letting my girl out there without knowing what she’s stepping into,” Faith rested a gentle hand on Jenny’s head, “understand?”

“Understood,” sighed Dr. Cross, “I call it Social Reality Cognitive Disassociation Syndrome…”

“Call it Superman for all I care,” Faith said, “still no idea what you’re talkin’ about.”

“If you’d let me finish?”

“Sorry.”

“Anyways, Social Reality Cognitive Disassociation Syndrome, or SRCDS for short, occurs when a patient is confronted with an experience that runs against their understanding of reality,” Dr. Cross explained, “I believe that when confronted with undeniable truth of magic and demons, all of which our entire society says do not exist, they suffer a break from reality.”

“I’ve seen plenty of norms not totally lose it because they saw a vampire,” Faith said.

“What these people saw wasn’t just one vampire or one demon,” Dr. Cross replied, “they were completely immersed in an alien environment overrun by supernatural creatures that none of them believed existed. Everything they saw went against their entire view, their entire understanding of the world itself, something they couldn’t dismiss no matter how hard they tried. From their viewpoint, they were thrown into a nightmarish fairy-tale, and their minds just couldn’t accept it.”

“So it was like waking up from the Matrix or somethin’?”

“I’m ashamed to get that pop culture reference, but yes,” Dr. Cross said, “and when they realized the enormity of it all, they suffered a psychotic break.”

“According to Angel, there were thousands of people involved,” Faith said, “how come more aren’t here?”

“I have no idea,” Dr. Cross replied, “I’ve devoted my life to psychology, but the human mind is not an exact science. Different people react differently to trauma, sometimes. This therapy group isn’t the sum total of my patients, please bear in mind, but you’re right. The number is low.”

“And not violent, right?” Faith said, “I know what you said earlier, but if I’m gonna let the sprout in there, I wanna be sure.”

“All these patients are non violent,” Dr. Cross repeated, “SRCDS is characterized by an inability to focus, a disassociation with reality while still being able to interact with it on some level, inability to track time…”

“Moments of lucidity immediately followed by prolonged bouts of depression which in turn leads back into disassociation with reality…”

Dr. Cross and Faith looked at Jenny. The young girl had her hand pressed to the glass, eyes cast over the patients. She pulled her hand back when she felt them looking at her.

“Or so I heard,” Jenny said softly.

“…right,” Faith muttered.

“Young lady, are you ready to do this?”

Faith felt a small bit of pride as Jenny looked at her, stood up a little straighter, and then said to Dr. Cross.

“I am.”

oooOOooo

It took the nurses a good ten minutes to herd all the patients into their chairs. Jenny felt a cold sense of déjà as she entered the room and felt their eyes fall on her. Their attention was wild and unfocused, and something in how they looked at Jenny conveyed how their eyes were looking past her as if she didn’t exist.

“Green, green as grass,” said one.

“Horned, horned as the rest,” said another.

“Hello,” Jenny swallowed, “my uhh…my name is Jenny Burkle. I’m a demon…”

Faith cleared her throat.

“…half demon,” Jenny clarified, “I was born on a world called Pylea…”

“Fake, fake fake green,” muttered one man.

“Special, like everyone, special effects,” muttered a woman of sixty years of age.

Jenny looked at Dr. Cross, crestfallen. None of his patients were looking at her like anything other than a little girl with makeup.

“Damn it,” Dr. Cross muttered. He wanted to kick himself for thinking it was as simple as this.

“What, did you expect her to burst out some super demon form?” Faith asked, “she’s just green and horned.”

“No, I expected them to engage her,” Dr. Cross replied, “some light conversation, just draw them out and into the reality of the supernatural. I may not have put enough thought this through.”

“Well, we gave it a shot,” Faith said with a sigh. The more she thought about it, the more Faith began to doubt if this was a good idea, “come on Jenny, we’re blowing this place.”

“No we’re not,” Jenny said firmly. She reached out to the closest patient, took his hand, and placed it on her horns.

Faith cracked a small smile. As a rule, Jenny hated it when anyone touched her horns. She explained that they felt like handlebars on her skull, and even the slightest brush up against them felt creepy and gross.

None of which inclined Faith not to flick them, when she felt the need arise.

“I’m real,” Jenny said, “does this feel like special effects?”

“No…,” the man said softly, “oh God, it was real. I…Becky…!”

The other patients looked at their friend, and then at Jenny.

“I think that’s enough for today,” Dr. Cross said with a practiced smile on his face, “Nurse Thompson? Why don’t you see the patients back to their room?”

“Wait, what?” Faith watched in shock as the patients were led out, each and every one of them looking at Jenny with a reserved awe, “she only got through to like one guy!”

“Therapy isn’t performed by a singular epiphany, but prolonged sessions addressing the issue,” Dr. Cross explained, “she connected with Kevin, and in turn made a dent with the others. Now, they need to meet with their individual doctors and go from there.”

“Well shit, that was a long drive for just a few seconds,” Faith said.

“Well, uhh, about that…” Dr. Cross said, “I have two more groups. If you’d be willing…?”

“Well, since you lied about it so nicely…”

“I want do it,” Jenny interrupted, “I need to.”

Faith huffed, but didn’t argue. This was Jenny’s show.

“But, umm, could I lay down for a few minutes?” asked Jenny. She rubbed her eyes, and her voice cracked as she said, “my allergies are acting up.”

“Of course, I’ll have Nurse Thompson show you a spare room.”

oooOOooo

Jenny plopped down on the bed, grabbed the pillow and hugged it close.

“Comfortable?” Faith sat down behind Jenny, and gently removed a few stray hairs from her face.

“Yes.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

“Ya sure?”

“Yes.”

“We’ll talk about it later then,” Faith sighed. She leaned down and gave Jenny a gentle kiss, “a lot of people would be proud of what you did in there, kiddo. Myself included.”

Jenny sighed in relief as Faith left, and let a few tears spill.

Watching those men and women wander around aimlessly, if trapped in their own world, their own minds, brought back painful memories. Her mother was like that more often than not, when she lived in Pylea. She was able to function, the Overseers wouldn’t tolerate laziness after all, but sometimes it seemed as if she and her mother were living in two entirely separate worlds.  

And Jenny couldn’t help but wonder from which world her mother’s love came from. The fictional, fairy-tale world she created inside her head? Or the cold, harsh world in which they lived?

“Honey?” Nurse Thompson tapped gently on the door and let herself in, “are you hungry?”

“Little,” Jenny said.

Nurse Thompson put a tray of sliced apples on the nightstand beside the bed. Jenny sat up and took a bite.

“Thank you,” Jenny said softly.

“What you did was very brave,” Nurse Thompson said, “sometimes we forget how strong we are, when all we can do is survive when the people we love die.”

“Who…who did you lose?”

“I lost my husband,” she said, “he died just hours before Hell A occurred, actually. I didn’t think I could move on, move forward, but I did. I had to, just to survive. And when it was finally all over, I realized I hadn’t even taken any time to mourn the man I loved so very much.”

Jenny nodded in understanding, in sympathy.

“When they took me to the market, I told myself I had to be strong. For my mom, for myself. And…and when I realized I’d never see her again, I just…accepted it,” Jenny said, “when I finally learned that she died, I didn’t even feel anything, I just…couldn’t!”

“I know honey,” said Nurse Thompson, “but you should know just because you moved on, doesn’t mean you didn’t love her. Life just didn’t give you the time you needed. It rarely does.”

“She gave me so much,” Jenny said, rubbing her wet eyes, “even though she’s dead, I’d never have the family I have now without her. Everything I have is because of her…and it feels so wrong because I never really mourned her death!”

“Jenny, you loved her,” Nurse Thompson said, “that’s all you need to feel to mourn her ‘properly’. There’s nothing wrong with that, or you.”

Jenny wiped her eyes, “Thank you. For listening, Miss Thompson…”

“Any time, sweetie. You look like someone who needs to talk to someone. That young lady who was just in here, she would listen…”

“Faith?” Jenny shook her head, “I don’t want to upset her. She already cares too much about me.”

“I don’t believe that’s possible, sweetie, but I understand,” Nurse Thompson reached into her pocket, and pulled out a business card, “here, my number’s on there. Feel free to call me any time. We can just talk, it doesn’t matter about what.”

“I… I couldn’t,” Jenny gently pushed the card aside.

“Please, honey, I insist. It’s no trouble at all,” she said, “it’s only fair to pay you back for what you’ve done here today.”

“Thank you, Nurse Thompson…”

“Please, no need to be so formal,” she said, “my first is Sarah, but my friends call me by my middle name…”

“Please, just call me Eve.”

  

 

 

 


	14. Spike

Spike

It was nine days after one of the worst days of Jenny life, that she first had ‘The Talk’.

Dennis had finished the lessons early, and since Gunn was catching a ‘Walking Dead’ marathon, Jenny thought she’d spend some time in the armory. After the turmoil of the last week, the stink of Illyria still clinging to the back of her mind, Jenny could only think of two ways to cleanse her mind and she needed solitude for both.

_“There’s a yellow rose in Texas, that I am going to see…”_

Jenny unscrewed the plastic casing on the taser Angel had given her, and carefully opened it up and set it next to the second one he’d had provided.

_“No other darky knows her, no darky me…”only_

The second taser had belonged to her mother, so Jenny was reluctant to do any experimenting with it until she’d at least finalized her modifications. Now more than ever, the idea of losing any more of her mother, no matter how small, just made Jenny’s heart clench.

_“She cried so when I left her it like to broke my heart…”_

Jenny removed several small blades from the cabinet, and began looking them over. According to Kate, there had been several demons with skin too thick to be fazed by the electrical shock, but Jenny was certain that it could be overcome with the right blade. All that mattered was how to connect it to the taser, how to jury-rig the knife to remain concealed until use and how to brace it properly so that when it pointed at demon flesh, it wouldn’t snap like a twig.

Child’s play, really.

Jenny went through the designs in her head while she sang. Lost in her work, in what to her was the pure act of creation and discovery, she hadn’t even noticed when the door to the armory creaked open.

_“And the Yellow Rose of Texas shall be mine forevermore.”_

“That, luv, is one of the most beautiful song I’ve heard in a very long time.”

Jenny’s head shot towards the door, “Spike!”

“You forget about our date, pet?”

Jenny grabbed the nearest blade, and threw it at the vampire, “Get out, get out, get out!”

Spike just barely managed to get to the other side of the door before one of the blades would have sunk into his ankle.

“Hmm, still not the quickest a girl’s run me out of a room,” Spike said. He then began counting down from five, and when he reached one, the door flew open.

“Oh Spike I’m so sorry!” Jenny’s small hands grabbed Spike by his leather coat and yanked him inside, “are you okay? Are you upset? I’m so so sorry!”

“Of course I’m bloody upset!” Spike said, as he went along with Jenny. She pushed him into a chair, and dashed for the medical kit, “you missed me by a bloody mile! Who’s been teaching you to throw, Angel? He couldn’t even hit his own forehead! Bet it was Gunn, he throws like a girl too.”

“What?”

Spike watched as Jenny stopped to give him an odd look as she processed the information, but he knew it was only half the battle if he wanted to overcome her guilt slash submission complex.

“Besides, it wasn’t like you threw any wood at me, pet,” said Spike, “isn’t there some reason why that’s harmful to vampires?”

“Oh, that’s because the dead cells in the wood absorb the energy that animates your body and creates a sort of feedback loop, like how two similarly charged magnets will repel one another,” Jenny explained as if she were a college professor giving a lecture, “well, that’s the simplified version, see…”

Spike nodded and said ‘Of course’, ‘I see’, ‘naturally’ and ‘well, obviously’ without prompting or understanding a single sentence that came out of Jenny’s mouth. Like her mom or Willow, Jenny loved to talk about science, to educate anyone who would listen.

But unlike them, she hadn’t learned to recognize a lack of interest slash comprehension. Spike knew she’d pick it up in time, but at the moment he was glad he was both immortal and experienced in surviving torture.

“…you forget this a lot,” Jenny observed, as she wound down her lesson, “maybe I should write it down?”

“Sorry sweet pea, I’ll remember it all one day, scout’s honor,” Spike said, “and sorry about stepping in when you were singing, pet. I didn’t mean to hear that, for what it’s worth.”

“I overreacted,” Jenny said softly.

“That song, your mum taught it to you?”

Jenny nodded, “They…we don’t have music in Pylea. I think it’s a culture and energy interaction, but, yes. It was something we shared, something only we had, at first. I…I’m sorry.”

“No harm done, Jen,” said Spike, “art’s a part of who you are, deep down, and I know what it’s like to have some meant only for family. Hard to even think of letting someone else see.”    

“But…I didn’t keep it just keep it to myself,” Jenny said, her voice laced with regret, “when they took me away, I thought if I’d share it…”

“Didn’t go the way you wanted, eh?” said Spike.

Jenny’s look said everything.

“Not easy to open up your heart and have people just step on it,” Spike said, “believe me, I have far too much experience there.”

“None of them kept it a secret, either,” Jenny scowled, “even the other zg’toff told Lorne without a second thought, after everything I did for them!”

“Hold on,” Spike reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumbled up piece of paper. He ran down the list, hand written by Lorne and given to everyone on the team, until he confirmed the word, “right, don’t say that word again, luv.”

“What, zg’toff? Why?”

“Because it’s an ugly word that has no business coming from the mouth of a beautiful little girl,” said Spike as he returned the paper back into his jacket.

“It’s…just a word.”

“So it wouldn’t mean anything if Angel or I called you a zigtoff? You wouldn’t care then, eh?”

Jenny brushed her eyes, “Please don’t.”

“Never will, swear it,” said Spike, “anyways, joke’s on them, though. Without them, Lorne never would have picked you out of that crowd.”

“I…never thought of that,” Jenny said. She still remembered Lorne’s stunned reaction when he asked her to sing, how a few bars seemed to hit him like a club the face. From there, everything just snowballed into the life, the freedom, the family, she had now.

All because of her mother’s song, her gift. Jenny wondered if it was fate, or a cruel joke that something she fought so hard to keep secret, to hold inside, was the key to her new life once it was pulled out into the open.

Life had no shortage of cruel jokes to play on her, Jenny thought bitterly.

 “For what it’s worth, even if it didn’t go the way you wanted, it was very brave of you,” said Spike, “took me over a hundred years and what I thought was going to be me final brawl to finally spit it out.”

“Thank you,” Jenny said, her tone neutral.

“So what are you working on here, eh?”

Jenny glanced at the taser, then to Spike.

Jenny studied the vampire carefully. She’d known him a while now, and come to the opinion that Spike was very much a blunt and straight forward person. But at the same times he’d observed how often, during a conversation, he would often change the subject for a moment, lighten the mood, before going right back into the serious stuff.

Jenny’s evaluation surprised even herself. She thought, she wanted, to leave those old instincts behind in Pylea, where knowing a person was the difference between life and death, but old instincts died hard.

“Spike, why are you here?” Jenny forced herself to say. She was beginning to suspect where this conversation was heading.

“My turn, remember?”

“No it’s not. And Faith said you were going to chase slayer tail in Rome,” Jenny replied.

“Plans changed.”

“Why?”

Spike winced, “Well, Illyria happened, luv. I was a part of all that, I’m here for my lumps.”

“I never meant to hurt Faith!” Jenny said, her eyes watering.

“Whoa there, sweet pea!” Spike raised his hands defensively, “that was a figure of speech, didn’t mean it literally. I know you didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I just want to talk.”

“Oh,” Jenny wiped her eyes, “oh. You lied.”

“I did,” Spike said, without hesitation, “not something I wanted to do, but I think you can understand why.”

The vampire watched as a scowl came across Jenny’s face, and saw it leave just as quickly. To Spike, Jenny was like a firecracker. She needed the right spark to explode, but without it she was completely harmless.

The young lime skinned girl turned to the taser, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Too bad, luv,” Spike placed a hand on the child’s shoulder, and gently turned her back around, “that load of bollocks might work with Angel, but not me. You can’t keep this bottled up, and I can help.”

“Shut up!” Jenny smacked Spike’s hand away, “you have no idea what it was like, seeing that thing! In my mother’s body!”

“I actually do know what it’s like to see your mum come back as something else,” Spike said softly, “and I know if you don’t deal with it, it could poison all your memories of her.”

“Talking won’t solve anything,” Jenny spat, “that thing will still be in my mom’s corpse, and you’ll still do nothing about it!”

“It’ll make you feel better, now and in the future,” said Spike, “that’s good enough for me, pet.”

Jenny looked at the workbench, and wished it was the escape she wanted, “You wouldn’t understand. None of you do.”

“Try me.”

“You all think I’m mad because that thing, Illyria, killed her,” Jenny explained with an angry sigh, “but I’m not.”

“Look here kiddo, just because we’re forgiven her for what happened, does not mean you have to,” Spike said, “you’re entitled to your own opinions here, luv.”

“I’m not mad,” Jenny repeated, “because I knew someone was going to kill her. I saw people die, every week. If…if I got angry about it, the Overseers…if they saw, they would have…”

Spike gave Jenny’s shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“They’re not here, and they’ll never hurt you again, pet. You don’t have to obey their rules one damn bit.”

 “I never knew mom like you did. You talk about her, you tell me stories and I barely even _recognize_ her,” Jenny sobbed. Without meaning to, she fell into Spike’s chest, weeping, “I only knew her as a sick cow! A slave, a thing! And I always thought that if nothing else, she’d get the peace of the dirt!

“When I saw that thing, I saw my mother still enslaved! Even dead, she’s still a slave!”

Spike just hugged Jenny as she wept.

“It…it just feels like a cruel joke!” Jenny wept, “she gave me so much! She’s the only reason why anyone cares about me, and I have to see her corpse walk strolling around!”

“Whoa, whoa hold up there!” said Spike, “your mum isn’t the only reason we care about you!”

“There were twenty three other slaves in my group,” Jenny said, her head still buried in Spike’s chest, “where are they now?”

“Umm…”

“You save anyone you can, that doesn’t mean you save everyone,” Jenny said.

Spike sighed, and silently wished Jenny wasn’t so damn smart and at time, seem so very old.

“Look here, sweat pea,” Spike gently moved Jenny away from his chest, and looked her in the eye, “yes, we came for you because of Fred, because of who your mum was. But we will always be there for you, always love you, because you’re Jenny Burkle. Not ‘Fred’s daughter’, but Jenny Burkle. And none of us damn one bloody bit how you came to be, either. You know that, right?”

Jenny nodded.

“And while we all loved Fred, you do need to know, you don’t have to drink the kool-aid there, pet.”

Jenny cocked her head.

“What? Kool-aid’s amazing! It tastes like fruit, it’s full of sugar and…!”

“Sorry, hold up,” Spike put a finger over Jenny’s lips, “another figure of speech, there. What I mean is, you don’t have to feel the same way about Fred, about your mum, that we do.”

“What? I love her! Why wouldn’t I?” Jenny said defensively, “after everything she gave me…!”

“Because when you talk about her, when you ask, I get the feeling that you’re holding something back,” Spike explained, “jus’ a gut feeling, mind.”

Jenny glanced aside.

“However you feel, whatever’s in your heart, there is nothin’ wrong with it,” Spike said, “and we’re not about to toss you out because you feel different. You understand that, right?”

“I do.”

“And anything you need to tell me, I’ll never tell another soul,” Spike said, “swear on mine.”

“I loved her, and I forgive her for not coming for me, it’s just…”

Spike frowned as he saw what he labeled Jenny’s ‘serious face’ surface. He saw Jenny as a pretty girl, prettiest little girl he knew, but all the same, that face to him was worse than any vampire’s, because it was simply too old to be on anyone so young.

“I don’t want to tell you why.”

Spike looked at Jenny as if she’d said the world was flat.

“She’s your mum…”

“And I loved her, but if you knew why, you’d hate me,” Jenny said softly.

“Jenny, pet, I couldn’t hate you…”

“You don’t know that as fact,” said Jenny.

“Yes I do.”

“Spike…”

Jenny shook her head, and Spike bit his lip. Jenny was braver than any child her age had any right to be, but as far as Spike was concerned, Jenny’s courage was like her holding her breath. She could put up a strong front in the face of the unknown, but only for so long. Because the longer she had to be brave in the face of the uncertainty, the longer her imagination had to create all kinds of terrible scenarios. And a smart girl like her could create some terrible things indeed.

“Alright, we’ll finish later, okay?”

“Okay,” Jenny nodded.

“And since we’re discussing uncomfortable subjects, you have to know how you feel about Illyria…”

“Doesn’t change how you feel about her,” Jenny finished, “she contributes more than I do, I know. I understand.”

Spike rubbed his head, “No, no, no. Illyria’s fought the good fight, saved lives including mine, same as me, Angel and Gunn. When you go through what we did….well, you’re older, you’ll understand.”

“I understand she’s in my mother’s corpse,” Jenny spat.

“That I’ll grant you,” Spike shrugged, “not saying you’re wrong to hate her, luv. I have no right to judge there. But I love the both of ye, doesn’t mean I have any intention of choosing between you either.”

“I know,” Jenny sighed, “but thank you Spike for saying so. Angel, Gunn, the rest, they feel the same way, but…”

“They don’t know how to say it, I know,” replied Spike, “they just don’t understand that sometimes it’s better to dive in head first.”

“Truth is always easier,” Jenny sighed, “because when people lie, it always hurt worse. Because you’d hope, and…”

“Truth might be easier, but it’s not always gentle,” Spike said, “the others, they want to be gentle with you. Truth be told pet, so do I. But we don’t always get that choice.”

“This is still gentle,” Jenny wiped her eyes, “on Pylea, I’d just be told, and no one would care about how I felt. And afterwards, they wouldn’t buy me ice-cream to prove they were sorry.”

Spike chuckled at Jenny’s awkward, but hopeful and a little mischievous smile.

“Is that what’s happening now?”

“You said you were sorry,” Jenny said, “I need facts to collaborate and confirm. That’s how science works.”

Spike stood up and offered Jenny his hand in the perfect gentleman manner gesture, “Well, who the hell am I to stand in the way of science? One Sunday or two?”

“Three!”

Notes: Spuffyduds is the one who created the term zg’toff (it’s not polite), and originally wrote Fred teaching Jenny ‘Yellow Rose of Texas’. Just givin’ credit where credit is due!


	15. Brotherly Love

Siblings

 

 

It started with rumors about a ‘Manson Family of demons’. And, in the course of the investigation, Connor and Jenny found themselves in conflict with the head of the family.

It was a harrowing ordeal, but in the end, it brought the two siblings closer together.

“I hate you!”

Jenny pushed herself against the car as it shook. She turned to her side and glared at Connor.

“This is all your fault!” Jenny snapped.

Connor rolled his eyes as he glanced over the car. Bolts of energy rained down, but he refused to jump. He at least still had two throwing stars, after all.

“How is this my fault?” Connor asked.

“You wouldn’t let me bring my tonfas!” Jenny snapped, “I could have taken them both out, and now they have distance on us!”

“With your aim, it wouldn’t have mattered!”

“Hey!”

Another bolt of energy rattled the car they were using for cover.

“Now, now, siblings shouldn’t fight.”

The half demon, half human creatures known as Nash and Pearl hovered several feet away, eyes crackling with magical energy.

“Shut up, you pervert!”

“Now now, we just want to be friends,” Pearl said.

“You want to be more than friends, you sickos!” Jenny shouted. She nearly stood up, but Connor placed his arm across her, keeping her from rising.

“Well, true,” Nash smiled, “but we should start at being friends.”

“I’m twelve years old, you perv!” Jenny shouted.

“We’re above humanity,” Nash said, “why should we be bound by it’s outdated customs?”

“Because it’s gross, and I hate you!” Jenny shouted.

“Think beyond yourself,” Nash said, “you two are both excellent examples of post humanity. You, Jenny, with your genius, and your adopted brother, the child of two vampires! Think of what your prodigy would be like!”

“Evolution doesn’t work that way!” Jenny said.

“Jenny, sis, please stop trying to use reason with the sociopaths,” Connor said in a controlled voice.

“…right,” Jenny said, “there’s a diner about a block from here. We need to make our stand there.”

“Are you sure?”

Jenny gave Connor her patented ‘Did you really just ask me that?’ look.

“Okay, okay, get ready to move,” Connor shot up and with practiced ease, let fly a throwing star that embedded itself in Pearl’s cheek.

“Pearl!” Nash shouted.

As soon as Nash moved to aid his sister, Connor grabbed his around the waist, and broke into a dead sprint.

“Hey, I can run!” Jenny protested.

“Not as fast as me!” Connor snapped.

Connor only set his sister down when they reached the diner. He kicked the door in like an action hero, strewing glass all across the floor and drawing the attention of the early morning diners.

“I need everyone to clear out!” Connor shouted.

The jaded citizens of LA just looked at Connor with looks of mixed confusion and boredom.

“What are you waiting for?” Jenny added, “get out of here!”

“Isn’t that…?”

“Angel’s daughter…!”

Everyone, customers , waitresses and chefs, rushed towards the exits.

“Unbelievable,” Connor muttered.

“You’re just jealous they recognized me, not you,” Jenny smirked. She leapt over the counter, grabbing a steak-knife as she went.

“Actually, you’d be surprised how glad I am they don’t see me as Angel’s son,” Connor kept an eye towards the door, “I was actually referring to how they were more willing to listen to a little girl than a madman who kicked in the door.”

Connor heard a distinctive ‘hiss!’, and smiled, seconds before Pearl and Nash flew through the far window.

“You’re cornered,” Nash smirked, “just surrender.”

“You smell that?” Connor asked, “that garlic smell? They add that to natural gas. You use those crazy eye beams of yours, we go explodey.”

“That just means I have to hand wrap my sister’s gift personally,” Nash smirked, “I’m willing to go the extra mile for family.”

Nash threw towards Connor like an arrow, and smashed him against the wall.

“Really, you’re the real prize,” Nash smiled, “but we can always grab her later.”

Connor snarled, and swung his elbow into Nash’s face, and slammed his knee into Nash’s crotch.

“You won’t touch her, ever!”

“Brother!” Pearl moved towards her brother, but Jenny leapt over the counter and kicked her in the face.

“You leave, now, or we kill you!” Jenny hissed.

“Jen, you were supposed to run!”

Pearl wiped the blood from her mouth, “What, no clever joke about how I’m not his type?”

“This isn’t funny!”

“Oh Jenny, don’t worry,” Pearl’s smile like that of a shark, “my brother has a very gentle touch, I promise.”

Jenny felt her heart pounding in her ears.  She used the diner chair as a springboard, and smashed her elbow into Pearl’s face.

“In time, you’ll wonder how you ever went without it.”

Jenny snarled, and went after Pearl again. Ever since coming to earth, Jenny had been trained, on and off, by some of the best fighters in the world. Connor, Spike and even for a few weeks, Buffy all helped shape her technique.

But at the same time, she was still a twelve year old girl, still growing and still nowhere near her full potential. Not a single one of her mentors was willing to get too rough with her, not yet.

And Pearl was a grown, mature woman, and much like Jenny, was the perfect hybrid between demon and human. Pearl grabbed Jenny by the wrist, lifted her up and off her feet, and slammed her fist into the girl’s gut.

Pearl then dropped the barely conscious girl, and then kicked her in the stomach for good measure.  

“Jenny!”

Connor head-butted Nash, and pushed him out of the way. Pearl, a smirk still on her face,  looked up to see Connor leaping towards her.

Connor’s feet smashed into her ribs, and Pearl was flung backwards.

“You were supposed to head out the back,” Connor grabbed Jenny by the arm and hauled her to her feet.

“I didn’t agree to that,” Jenny coughed.

“It was implied,” Connor said. Without another word, he spun around, and backhanded Nash.

The hybrid fell backwards, and Connor ducked under a punch from Pearl without even looking back. He stepped backwards, hooked his foot around Pearl’s heel and then threw his head back, smashing her nose.

Jenny watched in awe, and a little bit of envy, as Connor seemed to effortlessly throw back Nash and Pearl, effortlessly keeping them at bay while protecting her at the same time.

“Jenny…” Connor did a split-kick, and then fell to his knees, coughing, “we need to get out of here.”

“Oh, the gas!”

Jenny grabbed a breakfast plate off the bar, and threw it through the front window, shattering the safety glass.

“Time to go!” Connor picked up Jenny up under the elbow with one arm, and leapt out the window.

“Hey Nash,” Jenny flipped open the lighter she’d had ready since the moment she put the gas lines, “consider this a break-up!”

Pearl and Nash barely had time to gasp before the flaming light landed on the tile of the diner with an almost soundless –click!-.

Connor covered Jenny with his body, as the diner exploded in a ball of orange flame, glass flying everywhere.

The two took a sigh of relief, as they felt the heat of the burning diner washing over them.

“Do you think…?”

Two screaming bodies, drenched in flames, smashed through the ceiling of the diner like guided missiles.

“Oh, this is gonna suck,” Connor said.

The two sibling tensed, but Pearl and Nash couldn’t see them past the pain that wracked their bodies. The twins disappeared into the horizon, leaving nothing but a trail of smoke.

“Come on,” Connor hauled himself to his feet, and helped his sister up, “we have to get out of here before the cops arrive.”

Connor and Jenny only made it to a nearby alley before both were too exhausted to keep going.

“You okay?”

Jenny rubbed her sore stomach, “Hurt, but nothing broken. I still know how to take a beating.”

Connor’s eye twitched, “You wouldn’t have, if you ran like you were supposed to.”

“I know,” Jenny said, “but at the last minute, I forgot that you didn’t have a lighter.”

“No, you swiped it from my pocket.”

“I…”

Connor gave his sister a look.

“Sorry. It’s just…I should have told you, but…”

“Hey,” Connor placed a reassuring hand on Jenny’s shoulder, “I knew from the beginning. And I wouldn’t be any kind of brother if I didn’t agree.”

“I can’t. Just can’t.”

“I know.”

“Thank you,” Jenny then chuckled, “you know, this was kinda fun, actually. Despite the fact that it never happened, ever.”

“How’s that?”

“It’s just that, compared to those nut jobs, we actually seem normal.”

“Don’t make me laugh,” Connor did a little, though he fought it, “ribs are bruised.”     

“Sorry. So, about the diner…”

“No, I’m not taking responsibility for that.”

“Connor, come on!” Jenny whined, “I already burned one building down! Dad’s going to think I’m a pyro or somethin’!”

“Well, you are!”

“That wasn’t my fault!”

“Was to!”

“Was not!”

“Was too!”

“You are the worst big brother ever!”

 


	16. The Talk

The Talk

Charles Gunn found that cared about Jenny, almost as much as he feared the future talk slash confession they’d have to have one day. How he’d have to tell her that he was the one who enabled Illyria to kill her mother, how he all but delivered it to her lab for the sake of a small, pointless favor.

Every day that passed that Gunn did not have to make his confession, to tell Jenny of the sin that robbed her of her mother, he was grateful for.

Gunn’s guilty conscious was relieved, in a small way, when Angel ordered him not to speak of it, not yet.

_Then_

_“I thought we already decided on this.”_

_“I’m just sayin’, Angel, the longer it goes unsaid, the worse it could be.”_

_“Jenny’s already been through enough with Illyria,” Angel said, “more than enough, and she needs our protection. We don’t know how she’d react, and I don’t want to lose another bodyguard. It’s bad enough we have to keep Illyria at arm’s length now.”_

_Gunn glanced aside, afraid that Angel might see how relieved he felt about the orders, “She has a right to know.”_

_“Agreed, but when she’s older and can better handle it,” said Angel._

_Gunn sighed, “We’re procrastinating a lot with this girl, and her family. Fred’s parents don’t know she’s gone, let alone the fact that they have a granddaughter. It will come back to bite us.”_

_“I know, I know,” Angel rubbed the bridge of his nose, “but so long as The Scourge wants her dead, I need people I can rely on to protect her, until…until we can work something better out. If you can’t deal with the guilt, then I need to know now.”_

_“I can handle it,” said Gunn, and he meant it._

 For now, Gunn accepted the logic that Jenny needed him as a bodyguard slash uncle more than she needed to know the harsh truth. That would come, in time.

But Gunn nearly jumped out of his skin when, one day, Jenny looked at him and asked, “Gunn, can I ask you a personal question?

“Shoot, girl.”

“What did you do that was so terrible?”

Gunn kept a straight face, despite the panic he felt, “What do you mean, sweetheart?”

Where the question had come from, Gunn had no idea. Up until now, they’d been watching cartoons, and just hanging out in general. And Gunn couldn’t help but notice now, that Jenny waited until everyone else was busy before she fired her bombshell.

“People look at me a certain way when I’m out shopping with Faith, sometimes” Jenny said softly, “suspicious, fearful. Sometimes angry. Well, mostly angry. At… at me. And, some people, not a lot…do the same with you. I just wanted to know why.”

“Oh,” His mind still racing, it took Gunn a moment to realize what Jenny was talking about. When it finally dawned, he rubbed his forehead and with a resigned sigh, said, “ _oh_.”

 “I just don’t…don’t understand. I know… what I did, but I really can’t imagine what you might have done.”

 _If only you knew_ , Gunn said to himself silently, “And what did you do?”

“I…”

“The correct answer is nothing,” Gunn interrupted, “see, the reason why people…there are idiots, and…”

Gunn fell silent, as he tried to put it into words. He thought back to when his Grandma gave him ‘The Talk’, but realized she never really had. And it wasn’t because of the demons and vampires that infested their block, that made death a daily visitor.

It was because there were some facts of life that were just understood, even if they weren’t accepted, without a word of explanation. After your parents were killed by vampires, the ugly looks and whispers of strangers was walk in the park by comparison.

Only now, Gunn really wished they had had that talk, the ‘after school special’ sit down,  if only to have some place to start with all this.

“Jenny, the reason why people look at you and me like that, well, see…they don’t…” Gunn realized he hadn’t yet formed a complete sentence, and sighed. He decided on a different approach.

“Angel says you’re enjoying your history lessons, right? Kicking butt, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then you know the whole deal with Dr. Martin Luthor King, right?”

“Yes,” the wheels in Jenny’s head began turning, “oh. _Oh_. Racism? Really? That’s still a thing?”

“Yup, ‘fraid so.”

“But…how? One of your clan was elected president!”

Gunn gave Jenny a weary ‘I know’ smile, “One of my race, ya mean. And be careful using the word clan around us too, okay sweetie?”

“Well, of course he’s your race, there’s only one race of humans!”

Gunn chuckled, “You know that, I know that, science knows that, but there are more than a few idiots who disagree. Those people who look at you and me with suspicious and all that? They’re said idiots. ‘Cause all they see is black and green, and think that’s all they need to see to know who we are.”

“Why would…?” Jenny rubbed her head, trying to wrap her head around the idea, “really? People aren’t that stupid….are they?”

“You’re a smart girl,” Gunn said, “probably why you couldn’t see the answer, ‘cause it’s so stupid.”

“So, they don’t look at me like that because of something I did?”

“Pretty much. All they see is green. They don’t see the bright, caring little girl we all know and love.”

Jenny said, “That’s…that is stupid. And not fair!”

“I know, kiddo,” said Gunn, “wish I could tell you the world was otherwise, but it’s not. All I can tell you is not to let them get to you. Don’t let those assholes make you into who they think you already are.”

“I should have known,” Jenny said softly, “it’s just like Pylea. I wasn’t green enough for the other Zg’toff…”

“You know you shouldn’t use that word,” Gunn said firmly.

“…sorry. It’s just…this world seemed so different, so much better,” Jenny blinked back tears, “and now…”

“Hey,” Gunn gently pulled Jenny into a hug, “it is better. You’re with family now, girl, and all those jerks have now is words.”

Jenny squeezed Gunn’s hand.

“And when you get older, we’ll teach you how to be bad ass like the rest of us, so you never have to be afraid of those people again.”

“As bad-ass as Faith?”

“Even more,” Gunn smirked, “promise.”

Jenny smiled at the thought.

“How do you do it?” Jenny asked, “mathematically speaking, you’ve been dealing with it so long.”

“Hey!” Gunn poked Jenny in the side, eliciting an involuntary giggle, “not that long!”

 “It’s different for everyone,” explained Gunn, “I used to ignore it, told myself I didn’t care. Then I did what my grandma taught me, kill ‘em with kindness, and just smiled back with a goofy grin. These days, I actually kinda laugh.”

“Laugh?”

“All those people who think I’m a no good thief or thug? Hell, chances are, they owe me their life,” Gunn said, “nothing funnier than them thinking I’m no good, when I know I’m better than them.”

“I suppose,” Jenny said, less than convinced. But then, Gunn reflected, she hadn’t saved the world. Yet.

“It’s not for everyone, obviously. If you want to talk about it, you know you can talk to me any time,” Gunn said.

“I know,” Jenny said, “you’re always there for me.”

“And I always will be, that’s a promise.”

Every day that passed that Gunn did not have to make his confession, to tell Jenny of the sin that robbed her of her mother, he was grateful for.

But today was a day he was especially grateful.


	17. That Special Word

When Jenny first said it, she didn’t even notice. When Angel heard it, he’d never forget it.

“Come on, peaches, Jenny made it just for you.”

Angel looked at the belt in his hands with a mixture of curiosity and fear. It was a thick, leather belt with a large box, about the size of a lunch box, with a steel cord connected to a metal harpoon.

“And what is it?”

“Connor said I should call it the fisher,” Jenny said.

“Really?” Spike whispered to Connor.

“She wanted to call it the hooker,” Connor whispered back, “I didn’t want to explain to a seven year old why it was a bad name.”

“Good choice then,” replied Spike.

“Come on,” Jenny pleaded, “just try it, please! Come on, Dad!”

Angel did his best not to do a double take. With a bright smile on his face, he put the belt on before realizing what he’d done.

“So…what now?” Angel picked up the harpoon, testing its weight.

“You throw the harpoon,” Jenny pointed to a button on the belt, “and pressed that to retract it. Simple!”

“Think you can handle that?” Spike asked, with a smirk that made Angel very, very suspicious, “because I can draw a diagram if you like.”

“Try that door I brought in,” Connor said, “it’s just fiber board, but should work.”

“Okay,” Angel took a nervous breath, which failed to ease his anxiety as he had no real need to breathe, “lets do this.”

Angel called upon his centuries of experience, and threw the harpoon like Arab reborn. It flew through the air like a dart, but stopped a mere four feet away.

“You…umm…have to pull the cord out more,” Jenny said.

“Right,” Angel yanked at the cord, and gave himself some more length. When he judged that he had enough, he gave it another attempt, and the harpoon pierced the door flawlessly.

“Now, just press the button,” Jenny stepped back, “and reel it in.”

Angel took another not so reassuring assuring breath, and pressed the button.

The engine connected to the belt began to spin, and the door seemed to fly through the air at him like a missile.

“Wait, how do…” Angel brought his hand up to protect his face, but it was all in vain. The door flopped harmlessly in front of him.

“It worked!” Jenny threw her arms up in triumph.

“So uhh, there’s a safety length,” said Angel, “good to know.”

“Bahahahahahahaha!” Spike kneeled over, his body wracked with laughter. He rolled on his back, holding his stomach, “it’s…hahaha…it’s…hahaha!”

“What’s so funny?” Connor asked.

“You…haha! Don’t get it!” Spike was laughing so hard that tears fell from his eyes.

“Get what?” Jenny said innocently.

Spike pointed at Angel, “He’s…hahahaha! He’s wearing a utility belt! Captain Forehead is wearing a utility belt! Bahahahahahaha!”

Angel rolled his eyes, “Oh grow up, Spike.”

“What?” Jenny looked at Angel, then to Spike, and said with a pout, “this was just a joke? I thought you said it could be useful.”

Spike stopped laughing instantly, “What? No luv, it’s just a fringe benefit.”

“But…I worked so hard on the belt,” Jenny sulked.

“Come on, Spike,” Connor said, “using Jenny to play a prank? That’s cold, man. Did you at least promise to make it worth her while?”

“Of course!” Spike was on his feet in an instant, brushing the dirt from his coat, “tell him, luv!”

“Spike promised to take me to get me ice cream,” Jenny said, “but if this was just a joke…”

“Just ice cream? Come on, Spike, are you really that cheap?”

“What? No!” Spike said, indignant, “that was just the start, remember sweat pea? I also promised to take you to see a movie, remember?”

“You did?”

“Of course!”

“Didn’t you also promise me pizza?” Jenny said.

“That too, naturally!” Spike winced. He could all but feel the walls closing around him, “that reminds me, I have to meet someone. Somewhere…err, right now.”

Angel, Connor and Jenny watched as Spike politely excused himself as he all but ran from the room.

“Connor,” Angel took a moment before he looked at his son, concerned that the grin plastered on his face might give a mixed message and so he could deny seeing the fist bump between him and Jenny, “don’t use your sister for evil.”

“Is messing with Spike really evil? It seems more like a gray area to me, Dad.”

“Jenny, you’re okay with this?”

The young Hybrid smiled, “I get free ice cream, pizza and more time with Spike. What’s not to like?”

“Well, it is Spike,” Angel groused.

“So?” Jenny covered her mouth suddenly, “oh, wait, I called you Dad. I…I didn’t mean…”

“It’s fine,” Angel pulled Jenny close, “you can call me that any time you like, honey. But guys? Next time you pull something like this on Spike and don’t let me in on it? That’s when you’re in trouble.”

“Really?”Connor rubbed his chin with an evil smile, “because Jenny had this idea about putting this spell on his hair gel that’d allow us to control it remotely, change the color, alter the length…”

“I just thought, since vampires can’t see their own reflection…” Jenny said with a smile that Angel wished he saw on her every day, “Connor said pranks are okay, and they feel fun. They are okay, right?”

“As long as the victim is Spike, yes,” Angel said, “and I never say it enough, but I love you both so much.”


	18. Girl Talk

The Talk

“Angel Investigations,” Faith answered.

“Hey cupcake! How’s tricks? Got a moment to spare?”

“Always, green genes. What up?

“Not much, what’s Jenny up to?”

 “The sprout is with Spike,” Faith said.

“Stupid blue shell! I hate you!” 

The young voice carried throughout the Hyperion.

“…and it’s not going her way. We’re free to talk.”

“Assuming our little girl genius didn’t bug the phone,” Lorne chuckled.

“She didn’t.  Jen knows I’ll beat her ass if she does,” Faith said, “and if you are listening Jenny, I will find out. Start running.”

“Anyways,” Lorne coughed, “I could use you here Caritas 2.0, sweetie, toot sweet.”

“Something wrong?”

“Not now, but we have a friend who’s under the weather,” Lorne said, “blue around the gills, know what I’m saying?”

“You’re always so subtle, but I think I got it,” Faith said, “be there in a bit.”

Faith hung up and sighed.

“Now’s as good as time as any, I suppose.”

When Faith arrived, she couldn’t believe her own eyes.

Illyria lay on a queen sized bed, and she looked like hell twice over. The sheets were covered in purple blood, there was a hole in her thigh that the Slayer could see through and all in all, and dozens of cuts and slices all over her. All things considered, Illyria looked as if she’d been dropped in a blender.

Faith looked at Lorne, who gave her a ‘Yeah, I know’ kind of look and then at the God-King.

“Just what the hell did that to you?”

“Nothing,” Illyria smiled, her face still caked in her own blood, “not anymore.”

 “Well, glad to hear it, blue thunder,” Faith turned to Lorne, “we got this, Kermit. Could you give us a moment alone? Us girls need to have a private chat.”

“Sure thing,” said Lorne, “you need anything, just buzz, slayer o’ mine.”

Faith pulled up a chair, and sat on it cross legged.

“So, thunder smurf, how you been lately?”

“My answer is no.”

“No? That’s how you’ve been doing?”

Illyria scowled, “You know exactly to what I am referring to, slayer. Do not think because I require…a moment’s respite you can treatment with distain. I can still break you with minimum effort.”

Faith sighed, “Look, this arraignment we have going…”

“I have not voice a single complaint, have I?”

“No, but…”

“Have I defied our agreement in any way?”

“Surprisingly, no, but…”

“And have my contributions to the mission been insufficient?”

“That ain’t the point, see…”

 “This discussion is over.”

“Oh hell no,” Faith stood up and kicked the bed.

The God King did her best not to wince, to not grit her teeth and acknowledge the tremor of pain that shot through her, and gave Faith a glare that might have killed a lesser woman.

“If this chat is over, then feel free to get up and walk out. Otherwise, just lay there while we hash this out.”

“Enjoy my vulnerability while it lasts, slayer,” Illyria hissed.

“Well, this is off to a great start,” Faith put her hand over her face, “okay, lets start over. Illyria, how was your day?”

“Eventful,” Illyria muttered.

“Good. Happy to hear that. Now, about that arrangement I floated your way last week …”

“I am not interested.”

Faith sighed, “Do you at least know why I made the offer?”

Illyria narrowed her eyes, and looked away.

“…I do not care.”

“Believe it or not, it weren’t for Jenny’s sake, not really.”

Faith allowed the statement to hang in the air. Jenny had become the elephant in the room for Illyria for a few months now. No one was certain how to define their relationship, mostly because all parties involved did their best to make sure that there was no real relationship between them, Illyria included.

Faith often wondered what was going on in the God-King’s head. She still had Fred’s memories, and according to Spike, now shared his and Wesley’s memories of her as well.

With all those memories, all those emotions rattling around inside her brain, Faith wondered daily where they stood with Illyria. Hell, sometimes, she wondered if Illyria knew herself. Only the God King only knew what Jenny did to all of that chaos.  

Jenny was not so guarded with her position which were etched in stone and tears. She regarded the demi-goddess as an abomination, a parasite whose very existence desecrated her mother’s body. Faith couldn’t think of much that got Jenny good and angry, but Illyria’s very existence seemed to enrage her without effort.  

“This so called ‘arraignment’ we got goin’ on? To be fair, it ain’t fair to you at all. Keeping you on the outside like we do.”

“How is that a concern of yours?” Illyria growled.

“Because I know what it’s like to be the odd man out,” Faith said, “everyone’s all tight, buddy buddy and you’re on the outside looking in, wishing that was you. It’s not a fun place to be, no matter who you are or the reason why.”

“I have endured things that would crack the mantle of this planet,” Illyria said evenly.

“So you feel nothing, when Spike or Angel ask you to stay the hell away from the Hyperion?” asked Faith.

“It is not as if you offer an actual solution,” Illyria muttered, “all you proposed was exile.”

“It ain’t exile, well, not exactly,” Faith said, “look, Angel, Spike and me, we’d all vouch for you. And B would love the muscle you bring. Join her people and I can guarantee you’d make new friends, see interesting people, and kill all kinds of new things. And the name Winifred Burkle wouldn’t mean anything to them.”

“I will admit the offer is…was…enticing,” Illyria said.

“You’d be able to build your own life, free from the past,” Faith said, “not a lot of people get that.”

“I cannot,” Illyria said through gritted teeth.

“Because of Jenny?”

Illyria said nothing, which in turn said everything.

“Look, none of us are gonna be angry if you admit to actually caring about her,” Faith said, “we keep you away from her for her sake, not yours.”

“Understood.”

Faith exhaled, “Look, none of us think what’s going on is fair. I mean hell, you should be at the Hyperion right now, not in Lorne’s freakin’ guest room! To hell with what Angel said!”

Illyria chuckled, “Do you really think the half breed would have the conviction in him to turn me away, were I in need?”

“Probably not,” Faith said, “then why are you here?”

“You know why,” Illyria said, softly.

“Thought so.”

“She had seen her mother’s face savaged once before,” Illyria said, “Winifred vowed she would never see that again. She kept that promise, as can I.”   

“Thank you,” Faith said softly, “but, getting back to my point, what we have going on isn’t fair to you. But it ain’t going to stop any time soon. Just so we’re clear about this…

“You’re our attack dog. We when we need muscle, we’ll call you. But for any family gathering, or anywhere Jenny is, we’re gonna insist that you stay away. Is that understood?”

“Perfectly. I am your weapon of last resort, when you ignorantly challenge forces beyond your meager understanding, which is often. ”

Faith chuckled, “Whatever floats your boat. Just so we’re clear on how it’s gonna be.”

“Do not trouble yourself with the fairness of our ‘arraignment’,” Illyria said, “regardless of intent, I killed Winifred Burkle. Slowly and very painfully. And then I meant to retake this world with my armies. And when this city was dragged into hell, I allowed my guilt to make me a danger to all of reality.

Despite that, Spike, Angel, Charles, have all managed to forgive me. Even Wesley cared for me, despite the pain I inflicted on him.  Life is unfair, and until now that has been to my advantage.”

Faith shrugged, “Fair enough. Err, no pun intended.”

“Tell me slayer, why do you care?”

“Because you saved my bacon a few times, and you’re my friend, even if you’re not the most fun at parties, or anywhere else, really,” Faith said, “like I told you, I know how it feels to be the odd man out, the outsider. Even on the good days, it’s like a knife in the gut. I know from experience.”

“I meant regarding the hybrid,” Illyria clarified, “you only met Winifred once. Why do you care so much about her offspring?”

“Don’t need to know someone’s parents to care ‘em, ya know.”

“Agreed. But you do care. Deeply. Why?”

Faith shrugged, “I know what it’s like to be a little kid caught up in a world you barely understand. It’s terrifying, and I can’t help but think how I mighta turned out if I had someone…”

In her head, Faith’s thoughts drifted to her Watchers, and Mayor Wilkins. With a heavy heart, she finished, “someone better.”

“It is more than that,” Illyria said.

Faith looked at Illyria with a raised eyebrow, “So what?”

“I am merely…curious, slayer.”

“Well, if you must know, it’s kinda nice to have someone in my life who doesn’t look at me as ‘Faith, the rogue slayer’, the loose cannon or someone’s old buddy,” Faith explained, “to Jenny, I’m just plain ol’ Faith. No preconceptions or anything to deal with, clean slate. It’s kinda nice.”

Illyria nodded.

“There’s more still…”

“None of your damn business, oh ‘God King’,” Faith said.

“Very well,” Illyria said, “still…I suppose I should thank you for your consideration, slayer. I know you meant well, even if you were acting out of ignorance.”

“Hey!”

“Charles has taught me to drive your automobiles, Spike has sought my assistance in killing many interesting enemies, and Lorne has been of great assistance in navigating your mortal torture devise known as the cell phone plan.”

“Speaking of which, where do you keep your phone, anyways? Because I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear clothes with actual pockets.”

“I keep it secured in a body cavity,” Illyria said, “speaking of which, I need you to recharge the devise.”

“Whoa, yuck, and hold up, in that order!”

A panel in Illyria’s thigh opened up, and she held out the broken pile of plastic and wires, covered in his own purple blood, to Faith. Whatever had mauled Illyria, or vice versa, had taken the phone as collateral damage.

“Okay, not as gross as I expected, but still very eww,” Faith took the cell phone gingerly, and tossed it in the trash, “guess it’s time for an upgrade.”   

“At any rate, I am not the social pariah you believe me to be, not that I require mortal company,” Illyria said, “Charles, Spike, and you, all make time for me. I understand why you wish to limit my exposure to the hybrid that you and the half breed are caring for. I will whatever I can to avoid upsetting her, for as long as you require.”

“Well, I know what you immortal types think when you say stuff like that,” Faith said, “but it ain’t gonna be that long, Blue. When she’s a teenager, we can make tell her to suck it up.”

“I’d rather you didn’t,” Illyria said softly.

“Burn that bridge when we get to it,” Faith sighed, “we’re doing everything we can to protect her from uncomfortable truths, but we can’t do that forever. But now, as a kid? She needs the TLC, all we can give her.”

A moment of silence passed.

“…how is she adjusting to this dimension?”

“Beware the quiet ones? More like worry ‘bout ‘em,” Faith said, “get her started on something she’s interested in, and she’ll talk your damn ear off. But if she’s got a problem, she isn’t about to volunteer that information to us. The trip to the dentist was a damn nightmare. Honestly? After she saw you, I was kind a little relieved to know she actually could get pissed. She does her best really to be unobtrusive.”

“You need to make her understand that your love is unconditional, and that there is nothing she can ask of you that you would not provide,” Illyria said, “the culture shock between this world and the word she was born in is far greater than you could ever imagine.”

“…I know.”

“Just surviving, day in and day out, put an unimaginable weight on our…her soul,” Illyria said, “and the world is no less terrifying in its absence. Winifred dealt with it by looking forward, and helping others like herself. But that left her…incapable of looking back. Any reminder, her parents, the threat of being exiled again, was too much for her to bear.”

Faith rubbed the bridge of her nose, “I know.”

“Make her understand her situation, that she is family, not property. Make her understand she can ask anything of you. Otherwise, the results will be unfortunate.”

“We’re doing everything we can,” Faith said, “I swear to you on my soul’s, and Angel’s.”

“I know. But I worry.”

“Not alone there,” Faith breathed out, “Well, now that that’s all good and settled, wanna watch a movie? Because after all this real drama, I’d rather watch some that’s fake.”

“That would be acceptable. Have you seen Pacific Rim?”

“Seen the trailer, but I’m surprised you’d want to see it.”

Illyria chuckled, “The beasts remind me of some of my favorite pets, and the arrogance of humans to think you could stand against such creatures is always amusing.”

“And Charlie Hunnam,” Faith purred.

“Is he the one with the wings?”

Faith gave Illyria an odd look. Had the God-King just told a joke? If she had, Faith had to admit, she had a damn good poker face, “Sure, okay. Lorne has Amazon on this thing, right?”

oooOOooo

“Hmm, think it’s bed time for you, sweet pea,” Spike said.

Jenny was sprawled out on the couch, fast asleep. A little bit of drool was escaping out the side of her mouth, and while Spike was certain that he was gone only a few minutes grabbing a soda, he could already hear her beginning to snore.

“Think you need to get to get up to your own bed, luv,” Spike nudged Jenny gently on the shoulder, “up and at ‘em, sweetheart.”

Jenny came around slowly. She had a habit of fighting off exhaustion until the very last minute, a habit of her upbringing, and the few minutes Spike had been gone might have well been an hour.

Her vision fuzzy, all she saw was a large man looming over her, with something in his hand held high.

“No! No! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, wait!” Jenny scrambled to the far end of the couch, and brought her hands up to defend herself.

“Whoa, whoa, steady on, luv!” Spike took a step back, and kept his voice and face neutral.

This wasn’t the first time something like this had happened.

“…Spike?”

“You okay, sweet pea?” Spike fought his every instinct to reach out and hug the girl, to assure her that everything was alright and no one was going to hurt her, but bitter history had taught them it was better to let Jenny adjust, find her bearings before approaching.

“I’m sorry, I just thought…” Jenny swallowed hard, “thought I was back there, and I’d overslept.”

Spike nodded. To an owner, a slave that overslept was like a car with engine trouble, and a beating was treated as little more than preventive maintenance.

“It’s okay. Don’t worry about it one bit,” Spike said, while his (undead) heart raged. The idea that anyone might have laid an unkind hand on Jenny was like a knot in his stomach. He fantasized almost daily what would do if he got his hands on just one of Jenny’s old masters, and any reminder of how she suffered just made them more vivid, “you know you’re safe, right?”

“I do,” Jenny said, almost convincingly, “…please don’t tell dad.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Spike said, though there was no way in hell he wasn’t going to tell Angel what had happened. They didn’t need a shrink to know that he had to be kept in the loop. Spike gave Jenny a hug, and a playful pat on the head, “Maybe you ought to head to bed, eh? I’ll tell peaches to let you sleep in. Best way to get over it, you ask me.”

“That sounds good,” Jenny said, before she shuffled off.

Jenny closed the door to her room, and wrapped her arms around herself. Her head was a mix of emotions, and almost without thinking, she removed the cell-phone she had concealed under her bed, and dialed.

Half way across the city, a beautiful young woman tapped her Bluetooth.

“Jenny,” Eve smiled, “it’s awfully late for you to be up, isn’t it?”

“I just needed to talk,” Jenny said, “can we talk? Please?”

Across the room from Eve were three men, bound and gagged, duct-tape over their mouths, surrounded by men and women with ceremonial blades and ancient cloaks.

“Just give me a moment,” Eve made a slashing motion over her neck, and stepped outside before the blood began to spill, “what’s on your mind, honey?”

“I…had a flashback,” Jenny said, “and I think I upset Spike.”

“I don’t think that’s possible, Jen.”

“I do!” Jenny said, “I was scared, he saw and he was so angry!”

“It’s a little more complicated than that,” Eve explained, “if Spike was angry, it was because someone hurt you. They’re the ones Spike’s really angry at, not you.”

“I know, but…”

“Honey, just because someone’s mad about something that happened to you, doesn’t make you responsible. You know that, right?”

“I do,” Jenny said, “I mean, intellectually, but…”

 “But the heart is a different matter, I know,” Eve said, “but you can still teach it if you refuse to give up. If Spike was angry, it was at the people who hurt you. Not you, honey, never you.”

**Make her understand her situation.**

“Thank you,” Jenny said sincerely, “thank you for listening. I don’t know how I can repay you.”

**Make her understand she can ask anything of you.**

“Don’t worry about it,” Eve said. She looked at a three artifacts that rested on her office desk, “I’m sure I can think of something.”

**Otherwise, the results could be unfortunate.**

End.  

 


	19. The Message

Message

Jenny woke up to the ringtone ‘Thunderstruck’ blaring from her phone, resting on her nightstand.

“Ugh…really? It’s too early for her,” Jenny muttered, “answer, already!”

“Jenny? Shit, am I on speaker phone? Get your ass up and just hold the phone, you lazy sack of bones!”

“Mother,” Jenny drawled, “is there a reason why you’re calling me this early? I spent twelve hours in the lab yesterday! Today’s my day off!”

“Like you didn’t enjoy every second geeking it off,” Faith countered.

“Not the point!”

“Sorry kiddo,” Faith’s voice became serious, “but you’re needed. Not as lab rat Barbie, but as Special Agent Burkle.”

Jenny forced herself to sit up, “Special agent? What’s going on?”

“Nothing too serious,” Faith replied, “just a domestic dispute.”

“And why are we handling it? Not to sound like a snob, but cops have been handling that stuff for like decades now.”

“The wife’s a slayer, and the husband’s half Brachen demon,” Faith said, “dispatch said something about a nervous breakdown. They need someone of our experience, to keep things from escalating.”

“And someone to scapegoat if things go bad.”

“Yup. The fun of being federal enforcement, huh?”

“Great,” Jenny rubbed her eyes, trying to get the sleep out, “is the situation stable? I’ve found that federal agents get less respect when they have bed head.”

“It is, but you shouldn’t drag your ass,” Faith said, “Apparently there’s a kid involved. SWAT’s on stand-by.”

“Okay, okay,” said Jenny, “hey, why are you calling me? I thought McKnight was my supervisor.”

A thousand miles away inside the bowels of an American warship, Faith Lehane tested the weight of a battleaxe in her hand.

“No reason.”

Jenny listened for a moment, then scowled, “Oh, shit. You found the Red River Run, didn’t you?”

“You said that, not me.”

“You…! I wanted in on that!”

Faith rolled her eyes, “You just wanted to look at the eye candy.”

“I’m not ashamed to want a boyfriend with brains and brawn,” Jenny defended, “house, **shower.** ”

Jenny’s custom designed smart house started her shower, as the half human, half demon climbed out of bed and stumbled her way to the bathroom.

“And I was the one who realized that it was a ship of vampires ransacking the African coast! I should be there for the take down!”

“You’ll get the credit in your jacket,” Faith said, “but now we have to deal with it, and that means muscle, not lab geek.”

“I’ve got muscle!” Jenny said, “plenty!”

“You’re a middle weight at best,” Faith said bluntly, “this mission is nothing but combat. Even Illyria’s here. Hell, half the agency is here, which is why we need you to answer that domestic call.”

“Great,” Jenny huffed, “I’m still angry.”

“And I’m still not caring,” said Faith, “amazingly, I feel no guilt whatsoever about keeping you away from the magic murder mystery ship with hundreds of vampires aboard.”

Jenny stepped into the waiting shower, “Just…be careful, okay? Gunn isn’t there, is he?”

“Advisory and support role only,” Faith replied.

“Good,” Jenny sighed, “he’s good, but he’s getting older. And there’s the twins to think about…”

“Hey, we’re practically the same age!”

“But you’re a slayer and stubborn bitch,” Jenny deadpanned, “and if you bothered to read the articles I published, you’d know why you can still do what you do.”

“Hey, I read them. Couldn’t fall asleep otherwise. Now get your ass in gear, sprout.”

“I’m moving. Phone, end call,” Jenny sighed. She knew that she shouldn’t resent being left out of Faith’s mission, but she couldn’t help it. She was an adult now, with her own home and career, yet it seemed as if the overprotective attitude of her family hadn’t change one bit since she was first found.

And she worried it never would. As an adult in her late twenties, it was hard still being the ‘baby’ of the family.

“Focus on the case,” Jenny muttered to herself. She got dressed in seven minutes, federal suit, holster and all. She was almost out the door when she remembered (what was to her) the most important thing.

“Sorry, mom,” Jenny pocketed the locket her father have given her all those years ago, and put it in her breast pocket. Wearing it around her neck was an easy way to get strangled, but keeping it close to her heart was the next best thing.

If there was one thing Jenny loved about being a Fed, it was the ability to drive through Los Angeles traffic with lights and sirens. The blaring of the sirens was worth the head-ache, to avoid the even worse head ache of LA traffic.

She pulled up to the scene fifteen minutes later.

“Agent Jenny Lehane Burkle of the Federal Bureau of Supernatural Intervention,” Jenny said, and flashed her badge, “who’s in charge here?”

“That’d be Detective Blain,” the SWAT officer pointed the man out. He was a heavy set, middle aged man with a five o’clock shadow that seemed glued on, “he’s over there with the father.”

Jenny thanked the man, and went over to join the two.

“Detective Blain, I’m Agent Burkle,” Jenny introduced herself, “could you bring me up to speed?”

“Not much to tell,” said the Detective, “Gabriel Harris here swung by to pick up his son for his visitation, they’re separated, and she kicked him out. Says she needs to talk to a Priest to fix her kid and how this is all just some big ol’ lie that he cooked up to hurt her.”

“Oh, I know this song,” Jenny rubbed the bridge of her nose, “what happened afterwards?”

“Well, Gabriel here called some unis, she threw a couch at them and that’s where we are now,” said Detective Blain, “I don’t want to go in and shoot a woman in front of her kid because of a custody dispute, but we can’t just walk away either.”

Jenny turned to the husband, “Has your wife been under a lot of stress lately? Any sort of personal issues?”

“Sarah’s mom just passed away a few days ago,” Gabriel said, “they didn’t get along too well, but they loved each other and now…”

Gabriel’s voice trailed off, but both officers got the gist.

“And your son? Any, umm…stressors there?”

“He’s a good kid. All I can think of is when Jake had chicken pox, and we had to keep him home from school,” he said, “we had a real scare, because he developed black spots instead of red like most kids.”

“It’s common with hybrids, I developed yellow spots when I was ten,” said Jenny, “and that was not a fun time for my folks either…”

“So chicken pox made her snap?”

“She’s not insane,” Gabriel insisted, “she’s just…stressed!”

“Excuse me sir, could you give us a moment?”

Jenny waited patiently for the man to step out of earshot.

“I’ve got good news and bad news,” Jenny said, “which would you hear first?”

“Bad news.”

“Really? Most people got with good news.”

“I’m an untraditional kinda guy.”

“Well, I’m not.”

“Clearly.”

“I…hey, what does that mean?” Jenny couldn’t help but say defensively.

“You’re a Fed,” Detective Blain shrugged, “you’re all about tradition, don’t matter your department. Your look is older than you. You could have come off a damn assembly line. And yes, that’s with your skin tone.”

“Anyways,” Jenny drawled, “good news, chances are she’s not insane. I think she’s suffering from Cognitive Disassociation Disorder, which is kinda like a nervous breakdown with willing delusions.”

“This is good news how?”

“Well, it means we can still reach her,” said Jenny, “…in theory.”

“And the bad news?”

“If your eyes were up here, you’d understand.”

“Sorry,” Detective Blain rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “it’s just that, you don’t see a work of art like that every day. It’s a beauty.”

“They’re not…it’s? Wait, what?”

A light bulb went off in Jenny’s head.

“Men,” she grumbled. She un-holstered her service weapon, a custom built Desert Eagle, and handed it to the Detective, “there. Now can we have a serious discussion?”

“Sorry,” the Detective handed the weapon back, with a sheepish look on his face, “so, bad news because you’re green right?”

“Pretty much,” said Jenny, “seeing me could provoke her more. Don’t you have any hostage negotiators?”

“None of the brass want one of our guys in there with an insane woman who can tear someone in half without trying,” said Detective Blain, “we’ve tried the blow horn approach, but no luck. She’s just in there, pacing back and forth, probably freaking her son out the entire time.”

“So either I go in, or you send in SWAT and shoot her in front of her child.”

“Pretty much,” the Detective shrugged, “I’d hate to do that. You wouldn’t believe the paperwork…”

“Don’t get me started on paperwork,” Jenny muttered. She had long since given up on reacting to gallows humor, taking it as just another part of the job, “alright, I may have something if things go south. Give me a second.”

Jenny went to her car, and popped the trunk. Inside were several different silver suitcases, each individually labeled.

She removed her department issue weapon, and opened the suitcase labeled service weapon. She placed it inside, and moved to suitcase that said ‘urban warfare’.

Detective Blain looked over Jenny’s shoulder.

“…why is one of those labeled C-4?” he asked.

“Ha!” Jenny said, “Oh, don’t worry, it’s not C-4.”

“Then why…?”

“C-4 wishes it were what’s in that suitcase. When C-4 is born, it cries because it knows it will never be part of my batch,” Jenny explained, “I just labeled it C-4 for convenience’s sake.”

“So you carry plastic explosives in the trunk of your car why?”

“It comes in handy more than you’d think,” Jenny explained, “and I have a hard time being too far from it. Blame my Uncle Lorne, Dad does.”

Jenny slammed the trunk, and chuckled a little bit when the Detective jumped. If he was going to dump this case at her feet, the least she could do in return was make him flinch a little.

“It’s stable, don’t worry,” Jenny said. She tucked a pen into her breast pocket, “okay, I’m good. Keep the cops close, but wait for my signal.”

“What’s your signal?”

“A high pitched scream,” Jenny said, “believe me, you’ll know it when you hear it.”

“If I hear it,” said the Detective, “good luck, Agent. We’ll have eyes on you.”

When Jenny made her way up the walkway, it felt as if she was entering another world. The house was surrounded by a line of police, and a couch rested on the lawn. Jenny walked up to the front door, and knocked.

“Sarah? Ms. Geller? This is Federal Agent Jenny Burkle,” Jenny said, “I need you to open the door, please.”

The door cracked open, the chain still on. Sarah Geller, her breath stinking of booze, gave Jenny a long, scrutinizing look.

It was moments like these that Jenny knew were the most dangerous. The (sorta) mentally ill slayer was trying to figure out how to react, how to respond to the green skinned woman at her door.

“Federal Bureau of Supernatural Intervention,” Jenny flashed her badge. In situations like this, she found it helped diffuse tension, “I need you to let me inside.”

“This is a prank by Gabriel,” Sarah muttered. She closed the door and unlatched the chain. When she opened the door again, Jenny stepped inside slowly.

“Thank you,” Jenny saw a little boy peeking out from behind a door down the hall, “can we talk?”

“There is nothing to talk about!” Sarah snapped, “I just need Gabriel to go away until I get my son fixed, that’s all!”

“Fixed?” Jenny raised an eyebrow.

“I already called a Priest,” Sarah said, “I just…I just need some time to fix it!”

Jenny could still see Jake peeking out from his room.

“Ma’am, we should discuss this elsewhere,” Jenny said, “could we talk in the kitchen?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Sarah rubbed her head, and Jenny silently wondered just how much the slayer had to drink since this morning, “talk…we can talk.”

The two entered the kitchen, and Jenny began to feel a little more comfortable, more confident that she could handle the situation without violence.  Sarah was responsive, and wasn’t violent (yet).

“Now, could you please explain why you wouldn’t allow your husband to pick up your son?” Jenny began.

“Because I’m getting it…him…fixed!” Sarah growled, “making him right!”

“Making him right?” Jenny asked, “what do you mean?”

“My family priest…he’s coming by and…”

“Ma’am,” Jenny took a calming breath, “your son isn’t possessed or a vampire. A priest won’t be able to do anything for him.”

“Are you saying I don’t know how to care for my son?” Sarah slammed her fist into the granite table counter, leaving a few cracks, “don’t think he’s a thing like you! He’s a good boy!”

Jenny raised her hands defensively, “I believe you, just calm down. We don’t need this escalating.”

“Then get the hell out of here, and tell your cop friends this joke isn’t funny! If you do, I won’t be responsible for what happens!” Sarah grabbed a bottle of vodka off her counter.

“Ma’am, you can’t take on the entire LAPD,” Jenny said, “please think about this.”

“Think so?” Sarah took a giant gulp, “this pretend about demons, and slayers, I am so! Damn! Sick! Of it! If they don’t get out of my sight…!”

Jenny bit her lip. She was tempted to point out Sarah’s inconstancies, unwilling to believe in demons but calling her priest to fix her child. Unwilling to accept the supernatural, but believing she could take on an entire police force. None of it was logical.

But of course, it wasn’t any more logical to point out the holes in the thinking of a super strong woman under severe emotional distress.

Which left Jenny with only one other option. And it was neither fun nor safe.

“I’m sorry ma’am, you’re right,” Jenny took the pen out of her breast pocket, and removed a paper from her back pocket “I just need to get you to sign a few documents, and we can get out of your hair. Okay?”

Sarah put the bottle down, “Yeah, yeah okay.”

Jenny breathed a sigh of relief, and then stabbed Sarah in the breast with her pen.

“Arrh!” Sarah looked at the wound, and then to Jenny, “what the hell?!”

“Sorry, my sedatives work best when injected into fat, and uh…did you know that’s what breasts mostly are?” said Jenny.

Sarah pulled her fist back.

“Oh crap.”

Jenny stepped back just in time to keep from losing her head from Sarah’s right cross.

Jenny stepped forward and swung her elbow into Sarah’s face, stunning the slayer. She grabbed Sarah’s hair with her left hand, and with her right grabbed Sarah’s wrist and swung her head into the counter.

There was a loud –thud!-, and then the slayer fell on the floor, unconscious.

“Sorry, but for what it’s worth, what I did still hurts less than a bullet,” Jenny knelt down and checked Sarah’s vitals. She was unconscious, but her heartbeat was strong. She wasn’t going to be waking up anytime soon.

“Middle weight my ass,” Jenny said under her breath.

“Mom…?”

Jenny’s blood ran cold. She turned around, and saw Sarah and Gabriel’s son, Jake, standing in the threshold of the kitchen.

“Jake? My name is Jenny Burkle,” Jenny whipped out her badge. It was the experience of every cop that a badge helped put children at ease (it was a multi-purpose tool for a lot of social interactions), but situation was hardly typical, “I’m with the police. Your mom’s going to be okay, but we need to get you outside. Your daddy’s waiting for you, okay?”

Jake nodded numbly, “Okay, sure…”

_Later_

Jenny was giving her initial report, when she saw Gabriel approaching out of the corner of her eye. She tried to politely excuse herself, but not quickly enough to get away from Gabriel.

“Excuse me, Ms. Burkle?” Gabriel said, “could we talk?”

Jenny steeled herself. Addressing the family members of people you’ve arrested, assaulted or both, was always awkward. People always seemed to take offense when their family members were hurt, go figure.

“I’m sorry about what your son saw, Mr. Harris,” Jenny said with genuine sympathy, “but I felt your wife was a danger to herself and everyone around her. I’ve worked with slayers, and I know…”

“It’s not about that,” Gabriel said, “my son, he’d like to talk to you. In private.”

Jenny felt a chill travel down her spine. That was exactly what her day didn’t need.

“After what I just did…?”

“It’s not about that, I swear,” Gabriel replied. He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, “but…I think it’s best to let him explain.”

Jenny felt like she was being led to the gallows as she followed Gabriel back to his son. Jake was sitting in the back of a cop car, marveling at all the cops and police who were still milling about.

“Hey, son?  I found her,” Gabriel said.

“Thanks Dad,” Jake said, “is it okay if…can we talk alone?”

Gabriel turned to Jenny, and with his eyes asked for her consent.

“We’ll be fine,” Jenny said, though she would rather fight a pack of vampires than talk to the young man whose mother she’d just beaten unconscious. It wasn’t the most awkward situation she’d been in, but it was up there.

 “So Jake,” Jenny took a steadying breath, “I…”

“I know you didn’t want to hurt my mom,” Jake said, as he started to tremble, “you…I’ve actually…see, umm…”

Jenny placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, steadying him. She was more than a little surprised that he was so fluttered, “Take a breath, kiddo.”

Jake nodded, and calmed down somewhat, “You’re actually my idol. You’re the first hybrid, and I always thought you were so brave to live so openly and all the interviews and all your articles, and…!”

Jenny’s stomach twisted. The last thing she ever wanted was to be a role model, “I’m flattered Jake, but I’m just a normal girl. With green skin. And horns. Which is normal…for me.”

“My mom…you…,” Jenny could see the tears forming in Jake’s eyes. She bent down and took his hand, “she called me a thing, and said I was wrong!”

“I’m sorry Jake, she didn’t mean that,” Jenny said, “your mom has a condition, it’s called Social Reality Cognitive Disassociation Syndrome, and…”

“Your mom had it too, didn’t she?” Jake said.

The question was like a slap in the face to Jenny. She knew she should have expected it, should have known where this was heading, but was still a shock. For the millionth time, Jenny wish she’d never done that 60 Minutes interview.

“Did she ever say anything like that to you?”

_Pylea, then_

_“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Jenny wept as she struggled to stop. She tried to will her chest to stop pounding, the tears to stop flowing, her neck to stop burning, but nothing worked. Because everything wrong in the world was her fault._

_The Master, her father, had lost a small fortune in wahr-dice earlier in the day, and what was the point of owning slaves if you couldn’t spread the misery around? They were only things, after all._

_He came across Jenny playing with the rag-doll her mother had made her, and with an afterthought activated her collar._

_It was the second time her collar had ever been activated, but the first time Jenny was old enough to realize what happened. She fell over screaming into the mud, which brought her mother’s attention._

_Jenny didn’t know what transpired afterwards, but when it was over her mother had been collar shocked three times, and had a bloody nose and bruised cheek._

_“Shhh,” Fred wiped the mud away from her daughter’s face, “don’t be sorry, it wasn’t your fault. It’s okay, baby, it’s okay.”_

_“I’m sorry I made him angry, I’m sorry I made him hurt you…”_

_“You didn’t make him do anything,” Fred ran her hand through Jenny’s hair, “none of this was your fault.”_

_“I did! I’m sorry! I’m sorry I was born!”_

_Jenny didn’t her mother’s double take, and sharp intake of breath. All she saw was the reddened skin around her mother’s neck, and the pain she was responsible for._

_“Genny,” Fred placed her hands on Jenny’s shoulder, and looked her dead in the eyes. Jenny felt the entirety of her mother’s attention, the entirety of her person, focused on her, “I’m not sorry. I love you, and no matter what happens, I. Am Not. Sorry. And I know I never will be.”_

“Yeah, she did,” Jenny said, thankful that having a vampire for a father helped her poker face, “but she was very sick, and she didn’t mean it. Remember that, okay? Your mom’s going to be better soon, okay?”

“Okay,” Jake said.

Jenny hoped the boy was convinced as she called his father back over.

Without thinking about it, Jenny removed the locket her father had given her so many years ago, and opened it up. Looking at her mother’s warm smile, Jenny pulled her phone from her pocket. An internal debate bounced around her head, until she finally reached a decision.

“Call Dad, private line,” she ordered. The Hybrid tensed every time she heard the phone ring, and breathed a sigh of relief when it finally went to voicemail.

“This is Angel. Please leave a message,” followed softly by, “…did I do it right, Jenny? I hate these things.”

“Hey Dad, I just wanted…today I…,” Jenny took a moment to find the words, “I love you, Dad. I want you to know that.”

Jenny groaned as she ended the call, “Man, that sounded cheesy. Thank God he never checks his voicemail.”

_A minute earlier, half a world away_

“You know,” Riley Finn raised an eyebrow as he turned his head to his second in command, “even my grandfather remembered to turn his cell phone off in the movie theater. Why can’t you?”

“I’m a little older than your grandfather ever was,” Angel defended, searching his pockets for the offending phone, “and I thought I did. It’s my personal phone.”

“Who is it?”

“Jenny,” Angel turned the ringer off, and replaced the phone in his pocket.

“You could go ahead and take it,” Riley said, “we don’t launch for another hour at least, and even then you’ll be on the sidelines.”

“She wasn’t calling my emergency line, and we’re still prepping,” Angel replied, “so it can wait.”

“You sure?”

“Positive,” Angel said, “I’ve developed a sixth sense for this kind of thing. If I’m right, I’ve just gotten one of the best voicemails ever.”

 


	20. Order of the House

Setting Houses

 

Willow Rosenberg breathed out as she stepped outside Silverlake Hospital and rubbed her sore head, trying to collect herself.

“…so when will he wake up?” asked Angel.

Willow snapped her head and glared at the vampire.

“One second, okay?” Willow snapped. Hospitals were always hard on her, being attuned to magic, and thus, the world around her as she was. They were full of suffering and pain, people slowing fading into the next world, but love and joy, that of new born infants and lifelong ills cured and pains eased. It was an emotional whirlwind, and sometimes it took Willow a few moments to find herself in all of it.

“Okay,” Willow said, “I fixed up Gunn, and he should be up in three or four days, maybe. It’s not an exact science, because, you know, magic, so you just have to wait until his body realizes it.”

“Good, thank you,” Angel said, “I…Gunn really deserves it.”

“Of course, this is all about Gunn,” Willow’s eye’s drifted to the roof of the hospital, where she could sense a certain God King standing guard.

“Completely,” Angel said.

“Look Angel, a word of advice?” Willow said, “you’re going to be responsible for Je…Gunn, for a long time. Make sure all your ducks are in a row. Because there are a million little details you need to sort through and none of them are fun.”

“I know…”

“And don’t forget about the other thing,” Willow said, glancing again to the roof.

“Do you really think I could?”

“Point,” Willow said, “anyways, I have to go. Picking up Spike and then meeting with Buffy. Because one or both will kill me if I don’t.”

“You realize that Buffy will probably kill Spike for telling her he was back, right?”

Willow smirked, “Oh, yes. I’d paid to see what happens.”

“If you’re seeing Spike, could I join you for a moment?” Angel said, “I won’t take long, I promise.”

“You better not,” Willow said, “because I will start charging you, and my rates are not cheap.”

Angel watched as, in the blink of an eye, the parking lot of Silverlake Hospital was replaced with the darkened street. They were in front of a bar that had too many motorcycles, too few windows and not enough light. Angel’s battle worn instincts pricked up almost instantly.

“Is this where you’re supposed to meet Spike?” asked Angel.

“This is the place he gave me,” Willow said.

“You sure about that, Will?”

A large man, little over six foot, came crashing out the front window. An impressive feat, given that it was covered I a metal mesh net.

“Never mind,” Angel sighed.

“Peaches?” Spike stuck his head out the window, “what the bloody hell are you doing here?”

“Came for a quick chat,” Angel said, “think you could stop being an idiot for a minute?”

“Sorry, Angel, but I’ve got a schedule to keep,” a pair of strong hands grabbed Spike from behind, “if you want an appointment, you’ll have to discuss it with my assistants.”

Angel rolled his eyes as he stepped inside after Spike.

Angel wasn’t much surprised that Spike had already disentangled himself from the men who’d grabbed him. Angel counted seven men total, all sporting tattoos, leather cuts and unkind dispositions. He looked at the bar, and saw emblazoned across the bar ‘Knights of Thunder’.

“Ah, bikers. So there are two kinds of leather clad idiots here,” Angel observed.

One of them noticed Angel, and regarded him with curiosity.

“You with this English bastard?” asked the man.

“No, he’s all yours,” Angel said, “I’m just here to watch.”

Spike decked one of the Bikers, “Ever the noble hero there, Angel.”

“…Angel?”

The remaining Bikers stopped in their tracks, and turned to the vampire.

“Oh hell,” muttered one of them.

“We can take ‘em!” said another, “we got this one of the ropes!”

Angel raised his hands, and smiled, “Guys, I’m not here to fight, I promise.”

“Prove it!”

“You guys look like you got your hands full with Spike,” Angel stepped back, “make you a deal. You leave me alone and let me watch, and I’ll stand here until you’re done. That way, you’re only dealing with one vampire at a time.”

“Really?”

“Really,” said Angel.

“Really?” asked Spike in disbelief.

“Really,” Angel said again, “scout’s honor.”

The Biker’s attention turned back to Spike.

“Don’t believe him! He…was never a scout!” Spike swallowed as the bikers stepped forward like a wall of muscle, “oh bloody ‘ell.”

Angel watched as the brawl continued. He winced, he laughed and cringed, but within three minutes, the show was over.

“You’re a right tosser, you know that?” Spike wiped the blood from his mouth. He went to the bar, and removed a beer, “throwing me to the wolves like that. I thought we were mates!”

“Thought I’d teach you a lesson about biting off more than you could chew,” Angel said, “wasn’t like I was about to let them dust you. All they had were metal knives.”

“Which still bloody well hurt!” Spike protested, “anyways, I’m guessing this is about Jenny?”

“Yeah,” Angel sighed, “look Spike, I’m not trying to stop you from seeing Buffy…”

“Right, because you’d never so that,” Spike scoffed.

“…but I’d like you to consider making LA your home,” Angel said, “just for a little while, at least.”

“Really?” Spike said, “what makes you think that I won’t stay with Buffy then, eh?”

Angel gave Spike a knowing look.

“Right,” Spike sighed, and took a drink, “look, truth? You should just leave.”

Angel grimaced. He hadn’t wanted the discussion to go this way, “Look, I’m sorry if I implied…”

“I mean leave LA, you twit!” Spike glared at Angel, and pointed an accusing finger at Angel, “I owe Fred that! Me! You…you…!”

“Spike…”

“How many people here want to kill you? You ever think of that?”

“Every single day since Connor was born,” Angel said.

“And still you stay here!” Spike growled, “do you have any brains behind that enormous forehead?”

“Spike…”

Spike threw his beer against the bar’s mirror, “What!?”

“…you’re absolutely right.”

“What?”

“I’m not an idiot, Spike,” Angel pulled up a footstool and sat down, “Redemption’s a lifelong quest. Taking a decade or two off to raising my children? You have no idea how tempting an idea it is.”

“Then why don’t you?” Spike said, “take the kid and just disappear somewhere. Plenty of other cities out there looking for a village idiot.”

“Same reason I didn’t do it when Connor was born,” Angel said, “because of Holtz, ironically enough.”

“What, think that bastard is going to stage a comeback?” Spike said, “though, come to think of it, stranger things have happened…”

“I don’t mean it like that,” Angel said, “back when I was Angelus, Holtz was after me and Darla like a dog after a piece of meat. He was relentless…until he relented. For a few months, anyways. I initially thought I’d lost him, but then I overheard one of his men talking…”

“About what?”

“About his son,” Angel sighed, “I was surprised at first, surprised that Holtz would have delayed his mission for his family. Then I was absolutely ecstatic.”

Spike didn’t have to ask why.

“Because that was the moment that it well and truly clicked,” Angel said, “you and me Spike, we’re predators.”

“We were,” Spike said.

“Right, and how did we see things?” Angel said, “we saw our enemies as either predators or prey. Those we could overcome, and those we had to fight. It’s an instinct both of us learned to overcome. When Holtz chose his family over the mission, it became clear to me that that was his weakness, that…was how I could break him.”

“Until the student became the master,” Spike said, unable to stop himself.

“Yeah,” Angel said softly, “I know it’s dangerous, but any course of action is dangerous. Leaving now would be a retreat, blood in the water, and I’d have every wanna-be after me. Here, in LA, I at least have allies, I have resources and know the city inside and out.”

“So why are you here then?” said Spike.

“I need to know where my team stands in all this,” Angel said, “when I know that, I’ll know how to best protect Jenny while still doing my mission.”

“And which comes first?” Spike said.

“You already know the answer,” Angel growled.

“Right,” Spike sighed, “I meant it, you know. About owing her…”

“I know.”

“Still,” Spike took another beer out from behind the bar, “You want me, I’m on your team.”

“I want you, Spike.”

A pause.

“I gotta rephrase that,” Angel muttered.

“You really should,” Willow said, with a mischievous grin, “though Buffy would have given me like, a million dollars if I could have gotten that on video.”

“And on that note, let us be off, luv,” Spike said. He turned to Angel one last time, “I meant what I said, about you leaving LA.”

“I know,” Angel said, “but this is my city. I know it better than anyone else alive.”

“Right,” Spike said, “I’ll call you in a day or two. Let you know my arraignments, okay?”

“Thank you, Spike.”

“Good luck, Angel,” Willow said. She gave Angel a chaste peck on the cheek, and the two of them were gone.

Angel strolled outside, and then looked around.

“Wait, where am I?”

oooOOooo

“It’s the start of a whole new world, Angel cakes!” Lorne held his sea-breeze in the air in triumph, “and it’s made of money!”

Angel looked down at the crowd from Lorne’s office suite. The room was packed from wall to wall with people dressed in far too little, dancing to music that was entirely too loud for Angel’s tastes.

“Man, I’m old,” Angel muttered.

“No one’s perfect, Angel hair,” Lorne said, “so what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?”

“Were you able contact those contractors?” Angel said.

“Typical Angel, all business when the world outside is a party,” Lorne said, “yeah, and I vetted them all myself. By this time next week, the Hyperion will have a safe room on every floor, and a few other security holes plugged. But I’ve got to ask, wouldn’t it be safer to put a sanctuary spell on the entire hotel like we did back when Connor was born? If it’s about cost, I can…”

“It’s not about cost,” Angel said, “remember how long that spell lasted?”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“Do you know how I was always able to get inside Wolfram and Hart?”

“Charm? Good looks?”

“Because their defenses were so large and static,” Angel said, “I could afford to pick and probe at my leisure. I couldn’t even fix it when I was the CEO! Last thing we want is our own Maginot line.”

“Mag what what?”

Angel rolled his eyes, “Never mind. My point is, the best security systems are the ones inside that no one can see. The rest of the time, keeping Jenny safe will be on us.”

“Good thing we’re all so violence versed, eh?”

“Speaking of which, are we good? Because I’m asking a lot of you, especially considering…”

“Angel, you’ll only offend me if you finish that sentence, okay sweet cakes?”

“Sorry,” Angel said, “it’s just, I know Jenny hasn’t been that comfortable around you, and what I asked you to do…”

Lorne waved a dismissive hand, “Hey, this is Fred’s daughter we’re talking about her. Okay, cupcake? There’s no bridge too far for her, or her daughter. So don’t act like there is.”

“Sorry, this is all just making me a little nervous,” Angel said, “at least when Darla showed up pregnant with Connor, there was some time to get used to the whole ‘Dad’ thing. But now with Jenny, it feels like I’m always playing catch up…”

“And we’re going to have to play hackey sack with a so called God King,” Lorne observed.

Angel rubbed the bridge of his nose, “Sooner rather than later, too. I called in a favor and had a wiccan friend of ours fix him up.”

“Oh! Good!” Lorne’s smile quickly turned to a frown, “and terrifying.”

“Yeah,” Angel sighed.

“Speaking of dangerous women, have you spoken to Kate recently?”

“I was just about to, why?”

“Well, I may have accidently read her aura, and…”

oooOOooo

“What you’re doing is wrong.”

“Umm, care to narrow that down?”

Angel was in Kate’s living room, leaning against the wall as the policewoman went about cleaning her rather impressive arsenal. She regarded Angel with a quick glance of annoyance before she went back to her cleaning.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

“If you feel that way, why haven’t you done something about it?”

“Not one for easy questions, are you?”

“Given my responsibilities, I can’t be,” Angel said.

“Because the cure would probably be worse than the disease,” Kate set down the weapon she’d been cleaning, and looked at Angel, “you remember that case we worked together with the zombie cops?”

“Kinda hard to forget, even in my line of work.”

“Did you ever really think about it though, Angel?” Kate said, “I mean, really think about it? The list of crimes that were committed? Desecrating a corpse, assault with a deadly weapon, felony murder, attempted mass murder, reckless endangerment, conspiracy to commit murder, abuse under the color of authority and that’s just of the top of my head.”

“What’s your point?”

“It should be obvious, Angel,” Kate said, “I was forced into retirement because I helped you stop him, and Captain Linwood was reassigned to a desk job somewhere. And shit! He could have done it all again if he was any better at magic! As far as the establishment, as far as society is concerned, vampires are things of bad romance novels. So if I called child protective services on you, I literally have no idea how they’d react, let alone how Jenny would.

“For all I know, they might try to bleach her skin, or surgically remove her horns. Or they might stick her in a home for troubled kids, and forget about her. I respect you, Angel. And I respect what you’re doing for your dead friend. But in my opinion, you’re simply the least worst choice out of a lot of bad options.”

“Thank you…for your honesty?” Angel said, “brutal though it is.”

“If I’m going to be on your team, you need to know two things,” Kate said, “first is about Jenny. You’re not going to see one of the biggest, and most dangerous problem you’re going to have with her.”

“What’s that?”

“Gratitude.”

“Gratitude?”

“Yes, gratitude.”

“…gratitude?”

“What, is there an echo here?” Kate said, “think about it from her perspective, Angel. You’ve taken her from being a slave, a thing with no rights whatsoever, and you’ve given her a home, food, everything from her perspective, that she could ever want. As far as she’s concerned, she’s won the lottery.”

“So…”

“So do you really think she’s going to risk it all, when she encounters a problem? If she has an infection, stomach ache, do you really think her first thought will be ‘oh, I can ask for help’? Ask for more?’”

“…no,” Angel said.

“And that’ll be a problem,” Kate said, “you need to check her teeth and get her to a dentist, by the way. I doubt they had tooth brushes in that hell hole we took her from.”

“That’s…actually a good point,” Angel said, “what’s the second thing?”

“I’m on your team, but the second something better comes along for that little girl, I will make you take it,” Kate said, “there’s a reason why we have health care professionals in this world, and believe it or not, plenty of kids survive foster care just fine. What you’re doing is illegal for a God damn reason.”

Angel was silent.

“I won’t do it behind your back, you have my word,” Kate said, “and for what it’s worth, I think you’d make a fine father, Angel.”

“Thank you, Kate,” Angel said, “you won’t regret this.”

Kate waited until Angel left, before she replied.

“I already do,” Kate said softly to herself.

oooOOooo

Faith flipped her phone on, “Slayers are us. If you need help, please scream loudly at the tone.”

“Faith, how’d it go?”

“Oh, hey Angel,” Faith said, “we probably put a dent in your credit card, but Jenny now has enough clothes, underwear, shoes and assorted other crap to last through the next apocalypse. Which will probably be next Tuesday. So I’ll say three apocalypses, actually. So no more shelter hand me downs.”

“Good to hear it,” Angel said, “are the sister’s still there?”

“Your Transuding Furies groupies?”

Faith heard Angel’s name purred from down the hall.

“Yeah, they’re still here, still casting. I never knew you were so pimp, Angel! I mean, they just swoon when they hear your name! Literally! I always thought you were like a…”

“Don’t say a eunuch!” Angel snapped.

“What’s that, a male unicorn?” Faith said, “I was gonna say monk or somethin’.”

“Anyways,” Angel growled, “I have to make one final stop, then I’ll be back at the Hotel.”

“Good to know, pimp master V,” Faith said, “happy hunting!”

Angel just turned his phone of with an exhausted sigh. The last two days had been as fruitful as he’d hoped, but he still had one last person on his list that he needed to see.

“Dad!”

Angel saw his son, Connor, waving at him from a nearby hot dog stand.

“Good to see you, son.”

“Same, Dad,” Connor offered his Dad a hotdog, “they got bacon dogs here, can you believe it?”

“Hot dogs are already an abomination just short of black magic,” Angel replied. He glanced around, and saw that they were beginning to draw stares. Angel had hoped it had faded some, his notoriety after saving LA, and it had, but not nearly to the degree that he’d hoped, “lets go some place private.”

Connor nodded north, “There’s a nest nearby, we can talk on the way there.”

“Good idea,” Angel rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, “so…how’s school?”

“Pretty good. After dueling demons, college all nighters is a breeze,” said Connor.

“How’re your grades?”

“I got a 3.5 average, actually,” Connor said.

“Good, good,” the two ducked into an alley, “so, you remember Jenny, right?”

“Hard to forget. It was barely a week ago, after all.”

“See…the thing is…I have to…”

“Dad, can I have twenty bucks?”

“Huh? Yeah, sure,” Angel’s hand flew to his pocket. He whipped out the bill, and handed it to Connor as if it were on fire. Anything to delay the conversation he had to have, “umm, what for?”

Connor stuffed the bill in his pocket, “Spike called me earlier, and said you wanted to talk to me about Jenny. He bet twenty bucks you’d be a total dork about it, and I’m not paying him with my money.”

“Heh, so I guess you know what I’m going to say, huh?”

“Something along the lines of ‘You’re about to get a new sister but it doesn’t mean I love you any less’, right?”

Angel nodded, “Something like that, yeah. But more than that, I want to make sure Jenny’s always protected, there’s someone always watching over her…like…” Remorse spread across Angel’s face, “like I should have done with you.”

“Sounds like a good idea, great idea, actually,” Connor said, “so if you did that with me, wouldn’t Wesley have been a part of it?”

“Umm…”

“It’s not a problem at all. Just tell me when you need me, and I’ll be there.”

“Son, I know you’re busy with school…”

“Dad,” Connor leaned against the wall, next to his father, “can we have a father son conversation that I never want to talk about again?”

“That’s kind of been half our conversations up until now,” Angel observed.

“So what’s one more, then?”

“Fair enough.”

“You uhh…umm, remember your three month vacation?” Connor said sheepishly, then, before his father could reply, said, “Well, while you were down there, it was Gunn and Fred who looked out for me. It was Fred who made me dinner, taught me to brush my teeth and a million other small things. They ran themselves ragged looking for you and Cordelia, and taking care of me.”

“Connor, you couldn’t have…”

“Dad, don’t,” Connor said quickly, “hating you is one thing. I can blame Holtz for that. But for all I knew, Cordelia was in real trouble. And jerking Fred and Gunn around like that for three months? Sorry Dad, that was all me.”

“Connor…”

Connor raised his hand for silence, “Save me the speech, Dad. I already know what you’re going to say. But while I can still earn Gunn’s forgiveness, I can’t do that with Fred. She’s gone. Jenny’s all that’s really left of her now. So the best I can do, what I have to do, is share with her the best father in the world.”

A pause.

“And you.”

Angel rolled his eyes, “I’m over a hundred years old, son and even I saw that one coming.”

“Besides, it’ll be cool to have a little sister,” Connor said, “when she gets older, she can serve as a decoy when we hunt for vampires.”

“Yeah, wait…what?”

“Hey, I see a couple sneaking out!” Connor removed a stake from his jacket, “come on, Dad!”

“Connor, you were joking just a second ago, right? Connor? Connor!”

Author’s note:

First, lemmie say that I’ve no intention of dropping this fic any time soon. Dunno where anyone got the idea, but given it’s format, I can tell any story I want with little effort. I won’t give that up any time soon.

Second, Hope everyone enjoyed this chapter, Jenny-less though it was. A big part of this series to me is the issue of raising a kid while still doing the hero thing, and what it would entail. This is probably the only chapter where that makes up the entire plot, though.

Also, I wanted to focus on Kate some, since I only mentioned her in passing. She’ll get her own chapter soon enough, promise!


	21. How Jenny learned to love Lorne

Lorne

When the topic came up later in life, about what it was like to be raised in such an unconventional family, Jenny would simply point to her horns, and then say that she loved her new family instantly.

And it was mostly true. Spike, Gunn, Kate, Connor, Faith and Angel, Jenny took to them like a fish to water. For a time she was afraid they didn’t love her as much as she loved them, that she really didn’t deserve them, but she still loved them all the same.

The only exception was, for a time, Lorne.

True, Jenny came to love Lorne as much as the rest of her family. After all, lounge owner was the first to find her, to shelter her. Lorne was the man who took the first steps in freeing her from a lifetime of slavery, he embraced her without hesitation, he taught her how to dance (or as he would joke, deprogrammed her), could get her into the coolest clubs and parties with a single phone call and considered it his calling to spoil her rotten, when the opportunity arose.

But that didn’t matter, not at first.

Because when Jenny first met Lorne in hell, he was green, large and in charge.

And to Jenny, that meant only one thing.

oooOOooo

_Late one night_

“Heeeeeeeey, Lorne!” Faith stumbled to the bar, drink in hand.

“Hey, Faithy, what’s up? Besides your blood alcohol?” Lorne waved a hand in front of his face, “honey, I think I’m getting a buzz just standing here. And given how I start my day, that’s saying something.”

“Gun, gun, Gunn,” Faith squeezed her eyes shut, as the wheels in her head began to churn, “he…has Jen watch…Jenny for a few days. Gotta…gotta… get my booze and good time on.”

“Ah, ever the responsible parent,” Lorne winked, and then ducked as Faith tried miserably to slap him upside the head, “what do you need, cupcake?”

“That guy over there…” Faith pointed to a handsome gentleman surrounded by more than a few lovely women, “he…think he’d mind kids…Jenny?”

“His aura is pretty open minded, peach tree,” Lorne replied.

“Score one!” Faith said, “he…free? Good? Sexable?”

“Sorry, cupcake, he’s married.”

“What?” Faith slurred, “where’s his…his…round thingy?”

“His ring?” Lorne said, “it’ll be around in three weeks, and she’ll be the one who proposes. Heck, he won’t see it coming!”

“Maaaan,” Faith whined, “so close!”

“Of course you were,” Lorne cleaned out a glass, “another shot for your sorrows?”

“Naw,” Faith dropped her head on the bar, “Gimmie an IV…”

oooOOooo

Faith woke up to a splitting headache, in a large queen sized bed. It was hardly the first time she woke up hung over in a strange bed, but at least it was more comfortable than most.

“Man,” Faith lifted up the sheets, and saw she was missing her pants, but only her pants, “hope it was fun, at least.”

“’fraid not, baby cakes,” Lorne strolled in, a cup of coffee in each hand, “thought it best if you spent the night here, instead of trying to make it home sloshed. Give the monsters of the night a break, ya know?”

“Thanks,” Faith took the mug of coffee, and began gulping it down.

“Whoa there, little lady,” Lorne said, “you’re supposed to drink that, not swallow it.”

“We slayers do it different,” Faith handed the cup back to Lorne, and then plucked the second one from his hand, “thanks for the starter, green genes, and the bed. No fun waking up in a strange bed if ya can’t remember it.”

“I’ll take your word on it. You got a call from Gunn, by the way,” Lorne said, “something’s come up with his crew, and he had to drop Jenny off a little early. I’ve got her waiting out front for you.”

“Damn,” Faith muttered, “don’ want her to see me like this. Could you get her breakfast, let me freshen up first?”

“I’d…rather not,” Lorne replied.

Faith rubbed her throbbing temple, “Nuts, okay. Let me get my pants on. Guess I gotta feed her then, huh?”

“It’s generally what you do with kids,” Lorne observed. He handed Faith a roll of bills, “here, on the house. Or, ya know, me.”

“Damn,” Faith examined the roll of bills in one hand, “this could be her freakin’ college fund!”

“Actually, that’s not even half of last night’s take. After Hell A, you’d be amazed what people would pay for a taste of the wild side,” Lorne said, “I’m making money hand over fist over horn!”

“Well, thanks,” Faith said, “might be enough to cover her breakfast and lunch. Sure you can’t join us?”

Faith almost missed the wistful sigh, but it was impossible to miss the regret when he said, “Some other time, princess.”

“Come on,” Faith couldn’t help the feeling that something was off, “you got guys to manage the place, right?”

“Yeah, but you know how business is,” Lorne shrugged unconvincingly.

“How about dinner then? Come on, Kermit, we never have dinner together!”

“I’m pretty busy,” said Lorne, “come on, little green’s waiting for ya.”

“Lorne, wait!” Faith grabbed Lorne by the shoulder, “what’s going on? You haven’t joined us for a night out once! What’s up with that?”

Lorne gently pulled himself free from Faith’s grip, “I can read auras, kiddo. And I can see what mine does to Jenny.”

“Wait, does to Jenny?” Faith wanted to laugh, “I’ve seen you with kids, Lorne. You can’t really think that Jenny’s scared of you? I mean, I can’t think of anything less scary.”

“Thanks, doll face.”

“I mean, a one legged puppy is scarier!”

“No, really, don’t spare my ego.”

“A sick, diseased kitten…”

“Come on, Faith, really?”

“That section of Hell you took over must have been the wimpiest Hell anywhere, because…”

“Okay, okay!” Lorne sighed, “I get it! But look at it from Jenny’s perspective. Who do you think that I remind her of?”

“Remind her of…?” Faith wanted to smack herself upside the head, “oh. _Oh_.”

“Yeah, oh,” Lorne said, “look, don’t worry about it, she’ll come around. Just don’t push it, okay? She’s had a hard enough time as is.”

“Man,” Faith looked at the roll of bills Lorne had given her, “I feel kinda guilty about this now.”

“Don’t,” Lorne said, “whether she’s comfortable with me or not doesn’t make her any less family. Go have breakfast, and don’t worry about it, okay?”

oooOOooo

“Keep the coffee flowing,” Faith said to the waitress.

“Will do, hun,” replied the Waitress, “more pancakes for you, sweetie?”

Jenny looked at the two empty plates, and then to Faith.

“If there’s more room in there, sure,” Faith said to the unanswered question.

“Yes, please,” Jenny said.

“Be right with you, honey,” replied the Waitress.

“That waitress keeps looking at me funny,” Jenny said, “and it’s not because of my skin tone.”

“You probably remind her of someone,” said Faith, “so you have any plans after your tutoring session? Wanna hang out? Maybe I could braid your hair?”

Jenny sighed, and slumped in her chair, “What’d I do now?”

“What makes you think you did anything?”

Jenny huffed, “Because whenever you want to talk about something serious, you offer to braid my hair. You wait until you have my hair in your hand, and when I can’t get away, then you interrogate me!”

“I only did it once,” Faith muttered.

“Three times!” Jenny snapped, “three! It stops being clever after one! And Dad does it better anyways!”

“Sorry,” Faith said, “there was just something I wanted to talk about.”

“Obviously,” Jenny picked at her bacon. Something about these big ‘talks’ put a dampener on her appetite, “so…what’d I do now?”

“Just wanted to talk about a friend,” Faith said.

“Lorne,” Jenny said softly.

“I just want to know why you’re uncomfortable with him,” Faith said, “because I have to tell you kid, me and Angel? We trust him with our lives.”

“It’s just…”

“And don’t say it’s because he’s green,” Faith replied, “because so are you, last time I checked.”

“Not green enough,” Jenny said under her breath, “look, you don’t understand! It’s not just that he’s green, it’s that he’s always making threats, too!”

Faith looked at Jenny as if she’d grown another head, “Lorne? Threats? What Lorne have you been talking to, sprout?”

“He calls Dad Angel hair! He calls Kate cupcake! Those are food!” Jenny said, “he’s always threatening to eat someone!”

A pause.

“Don’t laugh!” Jenny hissed in anger and banged her small fist on the table, as Faith had her hand over her mouth, trying (and failing) desperately to control herself, “it’s not funny!”

“Sorry, sorry,” Faith cleared her throat, “sprout, those are just nicknames, like sprout! Spike calls you sweet pea and pet all the time, doesn’t mean he’s gonna eat you.”

“Of course not, he drinks blood,” Jenny replied.

“Look, do you really think we’d let him near you if we thought for a second that he’d hurt you?” asked Faith.

“Then why isn’t he part of the rotation?” Jenny said, “you guys never let him watch me!”

“Well,” Faith smiled good naturely, “in all honesty, he is kind of a wimp. And he’s got a business to run. Hell, come to think of it, he’s the only one of us who has an actual job. So is that all?”

“No, but…he’s…,” Jenny struggled to find the words, before she said what she really meant, “…he’s green.”

Faith placed a hand over Jenny’s, “Look, I know what it’s like to be scared. But…”

“No you don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“Know what it’s like to be scared,” Jenny said.

“You’d be surprised, kiddo,” Faith said, “anyways, why don’t you give me and Lorne a chance to prove that he’s on the up and up? Prove he’s not like those assholes in Pylea, okay?”

“I don’t…”

“It would mean a lot to me if you just gave him a chance,” Faith said, gave Jenny’s hand a gentle squeeze, “would you do that? For me?”

“…okay,” Jenny said, “what did you have in mind?”

“Oh, that’ll be a surprise,” Faith winked, “but don’t worry, I got somethin’.”

oooOOooo

“…I got nothin’,” Lorne paced back and forth behind his bar, “no, no, that’s not true. I got performance anxiety! Plenty of that!”

“Calm down,” Faith sipped a beer, “wasn’t like I gave her an exact date. We got a little time to brainstorm yet.”

“I know, I know,” Lorne rubbed his forehead, “…did she really think I was threatening to eat people?”

“’Fraid so, ‘cupcake’,” Faith smirked.

“Man, I shoulda know,” Lorne sighed, “they did that back home, ya know. Because life as a slave wasn’t hard enough.”

“Your family didn’t, did they?” Faith couldn’t keep from asking.

“No, never,” Lorne took a sip of his Sea Breeze, and then coughed under his breath, “we were too poor.”

“Well, don’t worry about it,” Faith said, “lets focus on this problem, okay?”

“Okay, okay…I still got nothin’. Maybe we could call this off?”

“Not gonna happen,” Faith said, “just chill already.”

“Easy for you to say, you’re her freakin’ hero, cup…”

“Careful,” Faith said quickly, “lets cut back on the nick names for a little, okay Kermit?”

“Reflex, sorry,” Lorne sighed, “maybe we should call this off, let her ease into liking me over a period of months? I’d be fine with that, princess.”

“Okay, better and I ain’t satisfied with that,” Faith said.

“Hey, I’m the one being all discriminated against!” Lorne said, “if…discrimination was based on up until now a lifetime of disgusting, inhuman abuse.”

“Well, you didn’t go through this with Fred?” Faith asked, “thought you might have some idea what to do!”

“No!” Lorne said, “though we did have other issues. Much, much deeper than we realized at the time, obviously…”

“Guess it helped that Fred knew about the concept of racism, huh?”

“Something like that,” Lorne muttered, “Faith, honey, sweetie, don’t take this the wrong way, but why are you so gung-ho about Jenny being cool with me? If it’s about the money, don’t worry. We’re a family, even if not everyone wants to visit.”

Faith stood up and flick Lorne’s horn.

“Hey, watch the accessories!” Lorne rubbed his horn gingerly, “has anyone told you how annoying that is?”

“A few,” Faith said, with a wicked smile, “look, you wanna know why I want you around Jenny more? Well, what exactly did Angel ever told you about my time in Sunnydale?”

“Not much, were evil, did some minion-y stuff for a bad guy,” Lorne shrugged, “he gave us the broad points, not the dirty details, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Then he didn’t tell you about me and the Mayor,” Faith said. She set her beer down, and leaned against the bar, “the guy was a monster in a lot of ways, but he became a father to me almost overnight. And you know why? Because he never put me down, or made me feel like I had to fight to prove I was worth somethin’.”

“I don’t see what this…”

“When you have to fight for self respect, for self worth, for basic dignity, unconditional love and support is like water on a fire. It’s better than the sweetest drug,” Faith explained, “it doesn’t matter who it’s coming from. It gives you strength, purpose and comfort. You give that out better than anyone I’ve ever met, Lorne. Truth? I think you can be better for that girl than me.”

“I doubt that, honey…”

Faith gave Lorne a look.

“…kiddo, but lets say you’re right? How do I get her to like me? The only thing that sets me apart from the people who hurt her is a nice suit!”

“You and Angel really over-think this stuff sometimes,” Faith replied, “she’s a kid. Just bribe her.”

“That’s…” Lorne rubbed his chin, “brilliant! I’ve got just the thing!”

Lorne looked at the calendar, and deflated a little bit.

“…gotta work on that timing thing, though.”

oooOOooo

“Birthday party?” Angel said.

“Yeah, it’s just the thing!” Lorne said, “come on, Angel hai…I mean, just Angel! I’ve got everything ready to go! But we’ve gotta move fast! And I mean light speed, bucko!”

“Lorne, slow down.”

“Did I not just say ‘we gotta move fast’?” Lorne replied, “slowing down is the opposite of that!”

“Just…what’s the rush?” Angel said.

Lorne turned to Faith, “You wanna explain it to him?”

“Eh, he’ll figure it out,” Faith said, “why don’t you split? Just give us the time and place, and we’ll show up with the VIP, okay?”

“Will do!”

Faith waited until Lorne rushed out of the Hyperion before she slapped Angel upside the head.

“Hey! What was that for?”

“Why didn’t you tell me Jenny didn’t get along with Lorne?” Faith demanded.

“Because we thought you wouldn’t be able to resist meddling!” Angel said.

“Oh,” Faith said, then and punched the Souled Vampire in the shoulder.

“Let me guess, that was for being right?”

“Sure, why not?” Faith shrugged, “do you really not understand why Lorne wanted to get this done ASAP?”

“…tax reasons?”

Faith just shook her head, “Vampires…”

“…cake about to expire?”

“Unbelievable.”

oooOOooo

“A Birthday party?” Jenny looked at Faith skeptically.

She, Angel and Faith were in the elevator of the Ritz Carlton. Jenny had made the expedition with the promise of going to a new restaurant. To the young Hybrid, every restaurant was like discovering a new flavor, and she loved each and every one.    

“Yup,” Faith said, “was supposed to be a secret, but I still remember our trip to the dentist.”

“Faith, let it go,” Angel slapped the Slayer on the shoulder, as they entered the elevator.

“A birthday party,” Jenny let the words roll off her tongue, studying them carefully. She’d seen enough television to know what the words meant, but she hadn’t really applied the concept to herself, “for me?”

“Yup.”

“That would mean…”

Faith gently scratched Jenny’s head, “Yup. Just try to act surprised, okay?”

“Okay, but how’d you know what day I was born? The calendars of earth and Pylea are dramatically different, and…”

“Magic.”

“Faith…,” Angel drawled, “we picked a date that symbolizes how we feel. You’ll see.”

The door opened on cue to reveal Gunn, Willow, Connor, Kate, Anne, some of the kids from the shelter and more than a few people Jenny didn’t recognize, and at the center of it all, Lorne.

“Happy Birthday!”

Jenny had promised to act surprised, but in all honesty that was a little redundant because she was genuinely startled at how many people had shown up for this symbolic event. How many people who’d shown up to celebrate, well, _her_.

“…thank you?” Jenny squeaked, and then felt very self conscious as she held the attention of the entire room.

“Happy birthday, girl!” Gunn swept Jenny up in a hug that lifted her up off her feet before setting her back down again, “we shoulda done this way before now, good thing Lorne clued us in!”

“Don’t worry, sis, you don’t have to give a speech,” Connor said as he swooped in, “they got a fifty inch television and an X-box. Wanna play some before we get to the presents?”

“Umm, okay?” Jenny was more than a little overwhelmed by all the attention, and was easily let away by her brother. Her eyes lingered on the pile of presents, more because her mind was slow in coming around to the concept that they were meant for her than any actual greed, “presents?”

“I think we broke her brain,” Faith whispered to Angel.

“Hey Faith, hey Angel,” Willow handed the two a cup of punch, “so uhh, how goes parenthood?”

Faith took the punch with trepidation, “Remind me again, how drunk was I when I agreed to this?”

“Perfectly stone sober,” replied Willow.

“That doesn’t sound like me at all,” Faith threw back the juice like it was a shot.

“It’s been…eventful,” Angel said, “thanks for coming, Willow. Jenny really enjoys…umm, e-talking? E-chatting?”

“It’s just talking,” Willow said, “Jenny’s a smart kid, and it’s nice to have someone to compare notes with. And I kinda like being a being a fairy God mother.”

Faith opened her mouth.

“Only if I’m a boy, and remember that I can steal your voice forever,” Willow took a sip of her punch, and gave Faith a ‘try me’ look.

Faith closed her mouth.

“All the same, thanks for coming all the same,” Angel said, “the wider Jenny’s circle of adults is, the better.”

“Hey, Angel?”

“Nina!” Angel gave his ex-girlfriend a chaste hug, “thanks so much for coming.”

“Glad to come,” Nina said, “I’d like you to meet my sister, Jill.”

“So you’re the man who used to chain my sister up,” Jill said with a coy smile.

“Yes! Wait… Err, I mean…”

“Damn Angel, I thought what we had was special,” Faith smirked.

“Faith,” Angel glared at the slayer, “the adults are talking.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Faith rolled her eyes and wondered away.

Angel turned his attention back to Jill, “So I guess you’re aware of your sister’s… condition?”

“I am,” Jill said, “and I’m aware of the fact that the vacation you sent me and my daughter on may have saved our lives. Thank you.”

“I’m glad to have helped,” Angel said, “I have to admit, I’m a little surprised how casually you’re accepting…”

“Demons, vampires and werewolves?” Jill said, “I’ve had to help secure my sister, and refusing to believe it won’t change anything. And Amanda spends too much time inside playing video games.”

“Which why she’s over there,” Nina nodded towards her niece, “playing video games.”

oooOOooo

“You’re green,” Amanda Ash observed.

Jenny looked at the new girl with a curious eye. Up until now, Jenny realized, no one had really made any remarks about her skin tone. At least, not to her face. They’d alluded to it, carefully, but no one really just came out and said it like Amanda.

“Yes, I am. It’s because of my…”

“That is so cool!”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I wish I was green,” Amanda said, “come on, lets team up, girls vs. the boys!”

“You won’t win,” Connor smirked.

Jenny gave Amanda a serious look, “We’re winning.”

oooOOooo

_Later_

“Hey you go sweetie,” Willow handed Jenny her gift, “saved the best for last.”

Jenny tore apart the wrapping like a wolf tearing apart a piece of bloody meat, and then read the label on the box.

“Digital chess?” Jenny said.

“It connects to an online database, and can offer suggestions, store games and provide history of famous strategies,” Willow explained, “I’ve got my own in Scotland. We can sync them!”

“So you got a game to make Chess…Chess-ier,” Faith observed.

“Hey!” Lorne clapped his hands together, “it’s almost time, gang. We need to get up to the roof if we’re all going to make it in time!”

“Roof? For what?” Jenny set her latest present down in the pile.

“You’ll see,” Faith took Jenny’s hand, and followed after Lorne.

Once looked around, and saw all the party guests looking towards the sky expectantly, but for the life of her couldn’t figure why.

“This is the best holiday,” Amanda said, “even if you don’t get to miss school. You’re so lucky today’s your birthday! And mom says you get to miss work as an adult!”

“It’s not…”

“It’s your birthday,” Faith cut in, “now be quite and enjoy the show.”

“Show?”

Jenny’s head snapped to the side when she saw the first firework explode. Her eyes went wide when the second and third made themselves known, and her jaw dropped soon afterwards.

It wasn’t just the amazing display of pyrotechnics that overwhelmed Jenny, it was the thought behind it. This celebration, this holiday, was what her family thought of her. Despite her mixed heritage, despite how she’d come into the world, despite everything, this was her adopted truly thought of her.

Jenny found it all just a little overwhelming.

Faith smirked when she saw Jenny’s reaction, and motioned for Lorne to join them. It took a series of head motions, dirty looks and silent implied threats before Lorne was standing nervously, opposite Jenny.

Lorne loosened his tie, and swallowed. Standing this close to Jenny, he didn’t have to be an empathy to see how Jenny was bursting at the seams with positive energy, and the last thing he wanted was to be a rain on that parade.

But fear of that vanished when Jenny took his hand.

“You’re home,” Jenny said softly, “when…we first met, that’s what you said to me. Thank you, Lorne, for bringing me home. Thank you.”

 

And with that, the 4th of July’s fireworks reflected Lorne’s emotion as well.

_Later_

Lorne, Angel, Faith and Jenny were walking up the Hyperion, when Jenny mustered the courage

“So…can we do this again sometime?” Jenny said, “I mean, umm…without leaning heavily on Lorne for financial support?”

“Hey, kiddo, I just called in a few favors,” Lorne smiled, “barely spent a penny, really!”

“Oscar’s family is on Medicare, Anne donates all her salary beyond the cost of living to the shelter minus ten percent, and after costs the Angel Investigations only brings in about five hundred dollars divided between about a half dozen employees,” Jenny explained, “and I would estimate the total costs of the gifts around twelve hundred dollars.”

“Uhh…”

“Yeah, she does that a lot,” Faith mussed Jenny’s hair, “and yeah, we’ll do it again in a year with a little less fanfare.”

Jenny did a double take.

“A year. One earth year?”

“Uhh, yeah?” Faith gave Jenny a curious look.

“A year!” Jenny clapped her hands together, “oh, oh, oh! I could make and test my own!”

“Yeah, no,” Faith picked Jenny up and threw her over her shoulder like a sack of flour, “time for bed, even if I have to chain you to it.”

“Thank you, Lorne,” Jenny called out over Faith’s shoulder, “thankyouthankyouthankyou!”

Lorne and Angel watched them leave, before Lorne threw his hands up in celebration.

“For my next trick, walking on water!” Lorne said triumphantly.

“You uhh…did an excellent job,” Angel said, “but I’m still going to hold you responsible.”

“For what, the best day of her life thus far?” Lorne said, “I plead guilty, Angel cake!”

“Well, there’s that sure, but you kind of missed something important.”

“Oh?”

“You got a young super genius, with plenty of free time…interested in explosives.”

Lorne thought about it for a moment, and then his eyes went wide.

“Oh… _oh_ ” said Lorne, as his face turned a little greener.

“Yeah,” Angel said, “oh.”


	22. You think you know someone. You never do.

_You think you know someone. You never do._

That was one of the first things Angel thought of, when he first met Jenny. Like everyone else, he was startled to learn that Fred had a daughter she’d never once spoken of, never even hinted at.

But in his quite, contemplative moments (which still happened on a regular basis), Angel reflected that it wasn’t as surprising as he first thought. He knew what it was like to lose a child, the pain and agony that accompanied it. Even when he had a target to focus his pain and rage on, it was still a terrible agony, a searing wound that he ran from in the form of revenge, anger or just the simple distraction of a case.

Fred could do none of that when she lost Jenny. She was lost in a world she barely understood when Jenny was taken. Looking back, Angel is now surprised at how well she recovered.

And Fred, Angel knew, was hardly alone with her secrets.

Gunn, a man of impressive cunning, intelligence and strength of character, sold his soul for a _truck_.  

Happy, outgoing and brave Cordelia, popped pain pills like candy behind everyone’s back for nearly a year because of the pain brought on by her visions.

Wesley, fearless and thoughtful, stole Connor from his crib because of the whisperings of an enemy and a forged prophecy.

To the others in his ad-hoc family, Jenny was Fred’s great secret. But not Angel. To Angel, Jenny was more symptom than anything else.

Because to Angel, Fred’s greatest secret was one everyone saw, but never recognized it for what it truly was.

Fred’s secret was bared for the world to see when she tried to banish the man who’d exiled her, Professor Seidal. It wasn’t the least bit surprising to Angel that she wanted the man dead, not after all she’d suffered through. Angel couldn’t begrudge her that, though he would have tried to persuade her otherwise.

It was the fact that she wanted, and intended to inflict, the very same torture that she’d suffered on the Professor. She needed it like she needed the air to breathe, and Angel saw how that loss of revenge drove a wedge between Fred and Gunn. And what he should have seen, but didn’t, was just how quickly Fred ‘recovered’ from it all, the betrayal and hurt.

In hindsight, Angel realized it was a neon sign that Fred hadn’t truly recovered from her time in Pylea.

Instead, Fred cut that part of her off like it was an infected limb, buried it in the corner of her mind and moved on. But life wasn’t like that, and the wound never stopped festering. When she learned the truth, that infection returned ten-fold.

Time heals all wounds, but only if they were treated. Otherwise, the infection just sank in deeper, and spread like a cancer.

Everyone had their secrets, their contradictions. Angel wondered what Gunn, Wesley and Spike would think of the man who convinced them to destroy the Circle of the Black Thorn for the sake of one fleeting moment of freedom for humanity, if they knew he was the same man who naively assumed that there would be an end to his quest for redemption, an end to his battle with evil.

Everyone had their secrets, that bit of themselves that they buried deep down and hid from the rest of the world, and sometimes even themselves. And Angel knew that his daughter was no exception.

Jenny’s relationship and opinion of her mother evolved with time, as Jenny grew older and wiser. But she never hated Fred, never questioned why she didn’t come for her.

Her family assumed it was because Jenny knew her mother was mentally ill, and simply forgave her. Jenny’s heart was just as big as Fred’s, after all.

Only Angel knew better. Only Angel knew why young Jenny never hated her mother for never rescuing her.

It began roughly a year after Jenny had come to live with them. The Black Circle had been put behind them, with great effort, and things were as normal as things got for an oddball collection of paranormal detectives raising a now eight year old human-demon hybrid under the radar.

It all began with a milk run.

Literally.

Faith and Jenny had just gone out for milk.

“Sometimes I think it’d be easier if we just bought a farm,” Faith remarked as she grabbed two cartons, “I bet if I poked ya, you’d bleed orange juice.”

“The amount energy and effort put into processing food on a farm would make that inadvisable,” Jenny observed, and adjusted her hoodie, “and you don’t have the attention span required for field work.”

“Hey!”

Jenny pulled her head back before Faith could flick her horn.

“Ha!” Jenny stuck out her tongue at Faith.

“Careful kiddo,” Faith reached out to Jenny, and gently, almost apologetically, pulled her hood back over her head, “don’t get too smart.”

“Sorry…,” Jenny glanced around and her ears perked up, as if she heard something only she could hear.

“Something up?” Faith had learned long ago to trust Jenny’s instincts, and put herself on guard. But all she could see was a few late night shoppers who barely even noticed them.

“Something sounds weird,” Jenny said, “my hearing is exceptional, and sometimes without realizing it, I…”

“Where?”

Jenny pointed down the aisle, “There.”

Faith tossed a jug of milk where Jenny had pointed, and watched it splatter against thin air.

Jenny screamed before the cloaking spell was completely dispelled, because she recognized the man, recognized the emblem.

The Honored Scars. Of Pylea.

The terror that swept over Jenny made her feel as if she were made of stone. She couldn’t blink, she couldn’t flinch, the fear that she felt was so overwhelming that she could barely breathe.

“Down!” Faith snapped. She moved in a practiced motion, and the folding sword of an old friend slid into her hand, and before the demon knight could draw his own, Faith had already swept hers across his neck.

“Jenny, we have to…” Faith turned around, and felt ice water run through her veins.

Standing behind Jenny were two demons in suit uniforms and familiar facial piercings. Faith instantly recognized them as members of The Scourge, self declared demon purists. That by itself was worrying, but one had a gun to Jenny’s head while the second had clamped a shock collar around her neck.

“Faith…?” Jenny’s voice cracked.

“So this is a bad guy team up, huh?” Faith did her best to ignore the fear on Jenny’s face, and the gun to her head. Dropping her weapon now might well kill them both, “that’s what it takes to capture a little girl?”

“This isn’t about you, slayer,” said the Scourge Demon with the gun to Jenny’s head, “this is us helping our demon brothers in Pylea. Your half breed friend, the Groosalugg, has been oppressing our brethren without relent!”

“So you want some hostages to hide behind to draw him in,” Faith finished. She felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, and it suddenly occurred to her that she wasn’t the only member of the team under attack tonight.

“I wouldn’t put it that way, but yes,” The demon cocked the hammer, and Jenny almost jumped “two are ideal, but I only need one.”

“Just so you know,” Faith dropped her sword, and she immediately felt the presence of two Knights behind her, “kill her, and there aren’t enough god damn bullets on this planet to drop me before take your head off.”

“Noted,” said the Demon.

“We should leave now,” said the second Demon.

“No!” snapped the first, “we need to show the world that we’re the new powers replacing Wolfram and Hart! We humble the so called hero of Los Angeles, and no one would dare stand in our way!”

“Threatening little girls,” Faith didn’t flinch as her hands were bound with chains behind her back. When they were done with that, they reached into her pocket, and removed her cell phone.

“Hey! Buy me a drink first!” Faith snapped.

“Filth,” deadpanned one of the Honored Scars as he backhanded Faith. The Slayer stumbled, blood dripped from her mouth, but she still smiled at the terrifying Jenny, and mouthed silently ‘It’ll be okay’.

“Call the vampire. We’ll make him watch what happens next.”

ooOoo

When Faith saw Angel and Kate arrive, she breathed a sigh of relief. Compared to the rest of the team, they were the old pros. Angel looked a little banged up, but Kate looked fresh as a daisy, even when she was armed with a shotgun.

“Angel! Welcome half breed!” said the first Demon (who Faith decided to think of as Moe), “you’re just in time to say goodbye to one of your females. You get to…”

“Jenny,” Angel said without hesitation, “you can keep Faith.”

“What?” Both Moe and Jenny said together, though Jenny’s voice was barely above that of a whisper.

“I’m sorry, would you like to finish?” Angel said.

“Guess you’re stuck with me,” Faith smirked.

“…”

“Unless the mighty Scourge would rather take a child,” Angel sneered, “scared of a slayer? Afraid to keep your word?”

“…fine,” Moe muttered, “open the portal. We’re leaving! Kyu’h! Cover our retreat.”

Jenny froze like a deer in headlights when she heard the portal open behind her, and a wave of nauseating familiar scents flooded over her. She didn’t hear what Faith said to her as she was dragged to Jenny’s home dimension. In fact, her brain didn’t start working again until she heard Kate yelling.

“…her go, now! You can still walk away clean!”

“Ha! I’ve got the gun, stupid human, and the hostage!” Jenny recognized the demon as Kyu’h, “you’ll let me walk out now, with her or she’s dead!”

“You leave with her, she’s dead anyways,” Kate said. She had her shotgun pointed at the Demon’s head, “I’ve killed your kind before, during Hell A, demon. You’re no vampire. You can drop your gun and walk away, or you die. Those are your only options here.”

“Ha! Idiot!” the demon scowled, “you humans think we don’t know your world, is that it? Your weapon is nicknamed a scatter gun for a reason! Shoot, and you’ll hurt this thing!”

“Jenny, cover your ears,” Kate said. The second Jenny plugged her ears, Kate pulled the trigger, and the demon’s skull exploded out the back.

“They make solid slugs,” Kate pumped her shotgun and cleared the chamber, “idiot.”

“Dad!” Jenny rushed to Angel, who bridged the distance between them in the blink of an eye, and tore the shock collar in two without breaking stride.

“Faith! Dad, I…I…it’s…”

“Shh, it’s okay,” Angel hugged his daughter, trying to calm her, “we’ll get her back, I swear.”

Jenny looked at her father, and was about to say something when Kate stepped in.

“Angel, we need to go,” Kate nodded towards the outside of the store, and the vampire saw the telltale signs of flashing red and blue.

“Right, we’ll…”

“I meant we as in the illegally harbored minor, and ex-cop with a questionable jacket who just made a new corpse,” Kate clarified, “you need to use your celebrity status to get any video cam surveillance, and convince your new friends in the police force to bury…figuratively and literally… this dead demon body. Do I really have to tell you why?”

The vampire gritted his teeth, “No. Get to the Hyperion, call Lorne and get _everyone_.”

Angel found that handing the distraught Jenny to Kate was as bad as any knife wound, but he understood that protecting his daughter took many different forms.

When Jenny returned home, she was met by Connor, Spike and Gunn. She saw the blood underneath their nails, could smell the sweat on their brow and tears in their clothes, and knew immediately they’d been attacked as well.

And then Jenny felt a stab of guilt through her heart, because none of them had been captured, none of them had been taken. Because they were alone, and she’d been with Faith. If it hadn’t been for her…

“It’s not your fault,” Connor said, as if reading her mind. Jenny didn’t resist as Connor led her to her room. Jenny climbed into bed, pulled the sheets close around her and tried to will the shock away.

Faith was gone.

To the worst possible hell imaginable, Pylea, all because she’d been so weak.  

Jenny didn’t even notice when Angel came into her room, and sat down on her bed.

“Jenny?”

Angel waited patiently for his daughter to reply. He wasn’t about to let her wallow in her own self pity, not without trying to do something first.

“…you should go,” Jenny said softly.

“I will,” Angel heard his daughter perfectly, yet completely misunderstood her, “I’m going to take Gunn, Kate and Connor, and we’re getting her back. Spike will stay here with you until we get back, and I’ve asked Anne to stop by, okay?”

Jenny just pulled the blankets over herself, and tried to will herself to vanish into her bed. Angel sighed, and stood up. He wanted to comfort Jenny, to drag her out of the pit of self loathing, but right now he could think of only one way, one person who could do that now, and she was a world away.

“So how’s the sweet pea, peaches?”

Angel closed the door to Jenny’s room, and motioned for Spike to follow him.

It wasn’t until they were down the hall, and in a room Angel had partially sound-proofed himself that Angel spoke.

“How do you think she’s doing, Spike?”

“Rather not think about it,” Spike muttered, “so what’s so special you needed to tell me alone?”

“I need you to stay here,” Angel said, “to protect…”

“I’ve been that little girl’s bodyguard over two dozen times now,” Spike said, “don’t need you to explain the concept there, mate. Shame to miss the fight, though.”

“There’s more,” Angel said, “and I’ll need you to swear to it before we leave. It’ll be hard, but I need…”

“Just hit me,” Spike said, “umm, metaphorically.”

“I need you to swear not to come after us,” said Angel.

Spike smirked, “You going to ask me something hard there?”

“I mean it, Spike,” Angel said, “this isn’t a joke.”

“Then bloody hell, don’t feed me straight lines, mate! I mean…”

“I need Lorne because he knows the language, locals and culture, Connor to track, and Gunn and Kate to act as go betweens with any human resistance groups,” Angel explained. He pointed to Jenny’s room, “that is almost the entirety of that little girl’s family. If we don’t make it back…”

Angel let the statement linger in the air for a moment.

“Alright,” Spike rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, “promise. Won’t come after you. I’ll send Buffy to save you or somethin’.”

“Thank you, Spike.”

“And thank you for taking the fun out of leaving you to die a horrible, bloody death,” Spike muttered, “good luck. Bring her back, eh?”

“I plan on it,” said Angel.

“One last thing,” Spike said, “I know we try to avoid the topic around Jenny, but what about Blue?”

“Illyria drops in and out of touch all the time, and she’s currently out,” Angel said, “and I can’t wait.”

“You will not have to, half breed.”

Both vampires spun on their heels, stunned how powerful God King had snuck up on them both.

“We need to leave immediately,” Illyria crooked her head to the side as she regarded Angel, “the longer I am here, the greater the possibility of upsetting the hybrid.”

“…agreed,” Angel grimaced. He never cared to treat Illyria as a second class citizen for the sake of Jenny’s comfort under the best of circumstances, but these were extraordinary times, to say the least, “Spike, give us five days. Then…”

“I know,” Spike said, “best get going then, eh?”

“Illyria, follow me,” Angel ordered, and the God King obeyed without a word. They met the rest of the team in the lobby, each and every one ready for action.

“I see we got Blue Thunder in our corner,” Gunn smirked, “the odds just started looking a whole hell of a lot better.”

“We might just get Faith back in one piece,” Kate said.

“We are getting Faith back in one piece,” Connor growled.

“’ey, Faith’s tough, she can hold out,” Gunn said confidently.

Kate’s eyes swept to Angel.

“…what?” Gunn said.

“When we first went to Pylea, Willow cast a spell to protect me and Spike, as well as the slayer squad,” Angel said, “there was a reason for that.”

“And these guys threatened Jenny,” Kate observed, “so…”

_The moment Faith stepped through the portal, she stumbled._

_“Get up!” Moe ordered._

_“Something…something’s wrong…!” Faith said._

_“Ask me if I care,” said Moe._

_He didn’t hear the snap of metal, or see Faith’s smirk. He was in the war camp of the Honored Scars, after all._

_“You should.”_

_“Is that right?”_

_Faith’s right hook literally sent Moe’s jaw flying._

_“Damn right.”_

_Faith snapped the necks of two demons with little more than the twitch of her hand, and took their axes._

_“You touched her! You sons of bitches!”_

_Faith killed another seven, even though all she saw was red._

_“What made you think you’d live, huh? When you touched a hair on her head, you died!”_

_A wave of men fell upon Faith, and she threw them back with little more than a shrug._

_“When you looked at her, you signed your God damn death warrant!”_

_Were Faith in her normal state of mind, she would have realized there was a reason why Willow had kept this power from her the first time they came to Pylea. The slayer would have instinctively known that all this strength came at too high a cost._

_But her bloodlust and outrage had formed an unholy alliance within the last Chosen One, and whatever small part of her realized the price of this power, simply did not give a damn. Not after she swung an axe and cut five demons in half._

_“What did you think would happen?!” Faith screamed, her heart pounding in her ears._

_Seventeen demons were dead inside of four minutes, and Faith felt as if she’d barely started. She didn’t notice the first arrow to pierce her flesh. Or the second. The third began to slow her down, but only after she tore it from her own flesh and put it through the skull of another attacker._

Connor and Gunn exchanged a nervous glance.

“Could she really burn a dimension to the ground?”

“It is possible,” Illyria said, “spells to ignite the oxygen in the all the air are the most efficient, but I have found plague spells to be more personally satisfying.”

“…right,” Angel said, “okay, Lorne identified a psychic hotspot across town. Gunn…”

“We will not have to travel that far, half breed,” Illyria stated. She raised her hand, and a portal appeared in the lobby, “this will take us to within three miles of the portal that took the Slayer.”

Angel and Gunn looked at one another, and then to Illyria. The power she’d just displayed went far beyond anything they’d seen from her up until now.

“Are you…certain?” said Angel.

“I can feel your trepidation, half breed,” Illyria said, “this sh…form has evolved to handle my majesty better. I am not what I once was, but I am stronger than before. And there is no threat of me exploding. The portal that was once here before is also of great assistance.”

“Good to know,” Angel said.

“Alright, lets get this show on the road!” Gunn said, leaping into the portal.

_ooOOoo_

The next day, Spike let Jenny sleep in. Sometimes, Spike found, it was better to let misery wear itself out.

But by noon, Jenny still hadn’t gotten out of bed, hadn’t gotten so as taken a bite of food, so Spike knew something had to be done.

“Knock knock, luv,” Spike strolled into Jenny’s room, and found her still in bed, wrapped in her sheets.

“Go away.”

“Can’t do that, sweet pea,” Spike said, “got me a gallon of ice cream, and I can’t eat it all myself.”

“Not hungry.”

“Don’t think I can ever believe that,” Spike said as he sat down on Jenny’s bed.

“Go away.”

“Can’t do that,” Spike said.

“Stand up. Turn towards the door. Put one foot in front of the other,” Jenny said, “process explained.”

“Learning snark from Faith, eh?”

Jenny was silent.

“They’ll find her. You know that.”

“You can’t know that for certain.”

“I know how tough Faith is,” Spike said, “and you do too.”

Jenny didn’t reply.

“And it wasn’t your fault they took her.”

“Yes it was,” Jenny said with painful conviction.

“Bastards like these, don’t understand people like us. They think that Groo will only stick his neck out for people he knows, people he loves,” Spike said, “it never occurs to them to think that any innocent person will do. That’s why they went after us, not you.”

“If I wasn’t there…”

“They were the ones who started it,” Spike said, “you’re smart, luv. Don’t be thinking something so stupid, eh?”

Spike held out hope for a few seconds, but he could almost feel Jenny sink back into her a ball of depression.

So he tried a different method, one that had a hundred percent success rate.

“Alright,” Spike poked Jenny just under the ribs, and was rewarded with a giggle.

“Haha! Stop it!” Jenny snapped.

Spike, being Spike, didn’t listen. He tickled Jenny until she was begging for mercy.

“Not ha…,” Jenny gulped for breath, “ha…not fair.”

“Life’s not fair, luv,” Spike said, “come on, luv. Take a bath, and lets have some fun, eh?”

oooOOoo

The next three days were both the best and worst of Spike’s life. He struggled to keep Jenny’s attention off of Faith, but it all came to an end when Jenny fell asleep on the living room couch.

She awoke to someone rudely tapping on her horns.

“Hey sprout.”

“Faith!”

Jenny tackled Faith like a professional linebacker, knocking the Slayer on her ass.

“I’msorryI’msorryI’msorry!” Jenny said, as she wept tears of joy and buried her head in Faith’s chest. She didn’t even notice the rest of her family standing behind Faith.

“This was not my best idea ever,” Faith groaned as she felt her still healing ribs move. She gently pushed Jenny back, “Careful there, kiddo. I still need some TLC. I just needed my favorite girl to know I’m okay.”

“You survived…” Jenny could barely believe the words that passed her mouth.

“Survived?” Faith stood up, a little wobbly, “baby girl, I kicked ass!”

“Faith can tell you about it later,” Angel placed his hands on Faith’s shoulder, mostly because he could smell the blood from her barely stitched together wounds, “she needs to see a doctor and get some rest.”

“I’ll be back later, kiddo,” Faith gave Jenny a kiss on the forehead, “behave for me, okay?”

Jenny nodded eagerly.

“Come on, Jenny,” Angel coaxed Jenny away from Faith, “you need to get to bed, and Faith needs some rest too, okay?”

Faith turned around, and mouthed to Gunn ‘catch me’, and Angel made sure to walk so that if Jenny turned around, she wouldn’t see Connor and Gunn carrying a limp and barely conscious Faith out.

_Later_

Angel grunted as he took his coat off, and hung it up. The last three days had been some of the longest of his life for no shortage of reasons. The biggest being that the energy of Pylea was like a nail to his skull, and eighteen hours of combat was exhausting to even a vampire of his age. Towards the end, Angel began to feel as if he was back in that alley, at the start of Hell A. If it hadn’t been for Kate…

“Dad…?”

Angel turned his head, and saw Jenny standing at his door, holding her family heirloom bunny, feigenbaum, close to her chest.

“…I…can we talk?”

Angel was exhausted, physically and mentally. He was bone tired, in that he could literally feel his bones knitting together and if a bus ran him over, Angel didn’t think he’d even notice.

“Of course,” Angel smiled. He sat down on his bed, and patted the side for her to sit, “what’s wrong?”

Jenny stared at the ground, and seemed to squeeze her bunny for dear life.

“It’s…it’s about Faith.”

“She’s going to be okay,” Angel said, though he omitted the fact that she was now in a medically induced coma, and that they were waiting on Willow to swing by to purge Faith of the energy she absorbed while in Pylea. In his head, Angel was already drafting excuses for them not to go and see Faith, so that Jenny wouldn’t see her in such a sorry state.

“That’s…good,” Jenny said, “but that’s…”

Jenny’s voice trailed off, but Angel placed a gently hand on her shoulder, and waited patiently for her to continue.

“I…I can’t…”

“Jenny, I don’t know what secret you’re holding unto,” Angel said, “but I promise you, you can trust me with it.”

“It’s…not just about Faith,” Jenny swallowed, “it’s…it’s about mom too.”

Angel kept the confusion from his face. What did Fred have to do with anything?

“You remember, how…how I told you to go?” Jenny said, “I didn’t mean to…go rescue Faith. I meant for you to leave my room, because I was so ashamed!”

Angel said nothing. He knew that with something like this, it was better to let Jenny proceed at her own pace.

“Faith, she’s done so much for me, and I…!”

“It’s okay honey,” Angel rubbed her back gently.

“No, no it’s not!” Jenny shouted, “mom came back here, and she never came for me, and I…”

“Jenny, your mom was very sick, and…”

“I don’t care!” Jenny choked, “I don’t care that she never came, because I never would have come for her!”

“Jenny, it’s okay…” Angel said slowly, uncertain of how to react to Jenny’s confession. His mind couldn’t begin to process it until he knew for certainty how best to react for Jenny’s sake.

All he knew was that Faith’s kidnapping sparked something in Jenny that she’d been holding down on since she was rescued. Something Jenny needed to confess before it ate her alive.

“I loved her, and I love Faith,” Jenny wept, “but I can’t go back! I never knew how horrible my life was! I don’t know how mom ever survived as a cow!”

“Because she was strong, just like you,” Angel said, “Jenny…”

“I’m not strong! When they opened that portal…I remembered the blood and dirt and…” Jenny couldn’t bring herself to look at her adopted father, “Faith wants me to be better than her, but I can’t! I wanted to beg you to leave her there, to leave her to die! I can’t go back!”

“Jenny, there’s no shame in being afraid,” Angel said.

“How can you say that?” Jenny demanded, “you’re heroes, every last one of you, and I’m just a coward who…”

“You’re a brave little girl who’s faced so many threats that she’s forgotten how brave she really is,” Angel said, “when we first met, you were brave enough to spy on me and the others. You were brave enough to steal books, to learn despite the risks.”

“That’s not…they…” Jenny choked, unable to bring herself to think about what Angel said. Her self loathing, this secret that she’d held unto for so long, had unleashed too much shame to allow anything to go against it, “Faith would hate me! And mom…!”

“They both love you,” Angel said, “nothing changes that, and nothing will, honey.”

“Spike said that too, but you can’t know that…”

“Spike is right every once and a while,” Angel said, “nothing you’ve said makes me care about you any less, Jenny. I still love you, and if Faith knew, she would too.”

“…I would have asked them to leave you too,” Jenny said, in a tone Angel recognized as desperate for punishment.

“And as long as you were safe, I’d be happy with that,” said Angel.

Jenny’s shoulder’s slumped, as the tension from her confession simply evaporated. Angel had little doubt that she had expected this all to go very different, and this was a rare instance in which he was legitimately proud to disappoint his daughter.

Angel placed a hand on his daughter’s shoulder, “Faith would feel the same way, too.”

“Should I tell her?”

“I think you should decide for yourself,” Angel said, “but I already know how she’d react, honey. Faith loves you every bit as much as me, and Fred.”

Jenny nodded, but said nothing.

Jenny slept in her father’s bed that night. And later, Angel found himself surprised how patient Jenny was when it came to Faith’s recovery. The slayer returned home two weeks later, and while Jenny was overjoyed, she was also a little restrained, Angel observed.

Jenny never brought the subject up again, never even hinted at her confession but Angel thought back to it now and again. When she was being packed into a private plane to be hidden an ocean away, when Jenny graduated high school with virtually every honor imaginable and when she takes the oath and is given her shield and weapon.

And he’s fairly certain that she never confided in Faith like she had with him, and he’s confident anyone who knows Jenny would ever imagine her confession from that night. And none of his friends could imagine the petty pride Angel felt, in that Jenny confessed to him and him alone.

You think you know someone. You never do.

But that doesn’t change who they are.

**End**.

Notes: Blame Spuffyduds. Again. The first line of this chapter was the summary for the one shot that’s inspired this entire series, and this chapter in particular. Damn you, Spuffy!


	23. The Date

The Date

“Hello?”

Barry Wilson looked around the lobby. He was in awe of the fact that he was in the headquarters of the now famous Angel Investigations. It should have occurred to him earlier, when he talked to Jenny, but somehow, it didn’t really hit him until he walked through the door.

“Is anyone here?”

“Hey, Barry right?”

The young man turned around, and saw an older woman in a in what he recognized from a hundred shows as a Federal suit, and despite himself, Barry stood up a little straighter, and felt as if the temperature in the room had risen a few degrees.

“No! I mean, yes! I mean…”

“Take a breath kid, you’re not under arrest,” she paused, and then smiled with a mischievous grin, “…yet.”

“That’s…that’s…good, okay,” Barry chuckled nervously, “is Jenny ready?”

“She’s still getting ready,” Faith said, “shouldn’t be long. When’s the movie start?”

“We have an hour and change,” Barry said, “I thought we’d catch a quick bite to eat first…”

_Quick bite with Jenny_ , Faith thought to herself, _that’ll be the day_.

“Just as long as you’re back by eleven,” Faith said, “and keep it PG-13, buster. Don’t think you’re going to pull a Captain Kirk, champ. Got it?”

“Of course, but…umm, Captain Kirk?” Barry asked.

“You know, Star Trek?” Faith said, “man, what are they teaching in schools these days?”

“I’m more of a Star Wars fan,” Barry said, “but I know who Captain Kirk is. I just don’t get the reference, ma’am.”

Faith was tempted to say ‘To boldly go where no man has gone before’, but the look of confusion on his face certainly seemed sincere, and the way he said ma’am so effortlessly made her think that the kid was on the level.

“Never mind,” Faith said. She motioned for Barry to follow her, “come on, you don’t gotta wait out here, kid. Thirsty?”

“I’m fine, but thank you,” Barry said.

The two entered the make-shift family room that had been built nearly a decade before, and found Angel sitting in a recliner, reading.

“Hey Angel, this…”

“Barry,” Angel clapped his book closed, and then set in on the coffee table next to his chair. His voice was steady and soft, with an undercurrent of steel, “I heard you talking. My senses are…far sharper than most people know.”

Faith took a moment to roll her eyes, “Anyways, could you keep the kid company while I grab the sprout?”

“Of course,” Angel gave a cold smile that would have made Angelus proud, “we’ll be right here.”

oooOOooo

“Ohgodohgodohgod…” Jenny muttered as she took another shirt and held it across her chest as she examined herself in the mirror.

It always came down to the shirts, Jenny reflected. She rarely wore a dress because of how they hampered her in combat, and shoes were easy enough to pick out, but shirts and tops…

Jenny looked at herself in the full length mirror. She was wearing dark blue pants and sports bra, and for a moment she wondered if anything would look good draped across her.

Whereas most girls worried that they were too fat, or had one too many love handles, Jenny had the exact opposite problem.

She still had a face, cheek bones jaw and eyes that deeply resembled her mother’s. When her family looked at her now, they joked that she looked like Fred’s big sister, especially now that her height was just under six feet.

But her lower body resembled that of a female body builder. She had strong abs and muscles that would make the average passer-by think she was at least a little obsessed with weight training. Amy teased her that she was ‘Korra strong’, and Jenny had to admit it was a little apt.

The truth of the matter, which infuriated Jenny to no end, was the fact that she barely put any effort at all into her figure. She didn’t diet (lord, did she not diet), and while she did exercise some, she didn’t do it nearly enough to have the body that she had.

The fact of the matter was that her demon blood meant that she was always in peak physical condition. Jenny would have been a lot more comfortable with the idea, if it didn’t also mean that she, in her mind, look so unfeminine.

“Hey kiddo,” Faith rapped on the door, and let herself in, “I got your boy toy downstairs. You almost ready to go?”

“I’m still deciding,” Jenny said. She held up two light sweaters, each just a little too big on her, “pink or red?”

“Save red for special occasions,” Faith said, “looks great on ya kid, but given who your dad is, well, don’t wanna give people the wrong impression.”

“Right,” Jenny put the sweater back on the bed, “hey, where is dad? Please tell me he’s at the office.”

“Oh, downstairs with Barry,” Faith winked, “introducing himself to the boyfriend, you know, the whole tradition thing.”

Jenny’s eyes bulged, and she tried to rush past Faith. The Slayer held one arm out and stopped her effortless.

“Faith, let me go!” Jenny did her best to get past, so Faith swept her arm back, and tossed Jenny on her bed.

“Faith!” Jenny was on her feet in seconds, “come on!” You know what Dad is like! He’s either bad ass, or a totally embarrassing!”

Faith chuckled, “Well, yeah. But if you go down there like that, you’ll give him a heart attack. Which is impressive, as it hasn’t really beaten in over a hundred years.”

It took Jenny only split second to realize she was still only wearing a bra. She saw her sweater laying at the edge of her bed, and began scrambling to it like a soldier in a trench.

“Hey, hey, calm down,” Faith took Jenny’s shoulder and sat her up.

“Faith!” Jenny protested.

“Hey, you need to listen to me,” Faith cupped her daughter’s face gently, and knelt down to eye level, “first, calm the hell down. It’s just a date. Second, I know you’re nervous, but if you keep acting like this is your only one, and not first, then you’ll just screw everything up.”

“It’s not like that,” Jenny said unconvincingly.

“Oh?”

“I really like Barry,” Jenny said, “you know he’s on the football and chess team? He’s smart and cute, and he likes me! It’s just…”

“If things go bad, he’s not the only boy who’ll ever be interested in you, promise,” Faith said. Jenny looked at her, a heavy frown on her face, “hey, I’m just saying. I’m not saying you two don’t have a chance, but he’s not your only hope at happiness, kiddo. And it’s not fair to put that on him either, alright?”

“I know,” Jenny sighed.

“It’s just a date,” Faith gave her daughter a reassuring smile, “you’ll have plenty more of them in the future, believe me. Now lets find you something to wear so we bail out Barry, okay?”

“Oh God yes.”

oooOOooo

“It’s an honor to meet you, sir,” Barry said, “I hope I’m not interrupting any research, Mr. Angel sir?”

“Just a little light reading,” Angel stood up, and gave his book, ‘ _How to Get Away with Murder in America: Drug Lords, Dirty Pols, Obsessed Cops, and the Quiet Man Who Became the CIA's Master Killer by Evan Wright_ ’, a meaningful look, “nothing more.”

Barry didn’t even glance aside.

“Jenny’s told me so much about you,” Barry said, “did you actually ride a dragon? Did you really kill a dozen vampires?”

“I’ve killed much more than that, Barry,” Angel said.

“Oh, I can imagine!” Barry smiled, still in awe, “you wouldn’t believe the stories I’ve heard. I don’t want to ask Jenny about them, because ya know, it seems rude, but wow! You’re a living legend, sir!”

“Given what I do to people who’ve hurt those I care about, I should be,” Angel remarked, “because before I became law enforcement, I firmly believed that if you hurt someone, you should be hurt in turn at least a hundred times worse.”

“Guess you kinda had to,” Barry said, “Jenny said things were kinda like the Wild West, and you guys were cowboys.”

“Not the greatest comparison,” Angel said, “we preferred not to use guns. Swords and knives really. Edged weapons are always the best. Actually, that reminds me. Could you give me a hand with something?”

“Sure, anything, sir.”

Angel walked over to a corner where two swords and an axe were neatly propped up against the wall.

“I left these weapons laying out by mistake. Could you grab one, and help me take them to the armory?”

“No problem, sir,” Barry said. He picked up the double sided axe carefully, “umm, where is it?”

“Follow me,” Angel said icily.

When they entered the armory, Angel allowed himself a small smile as Barry stopped in his tracks at the sight of so many axes, crossbows, swords and other assorted deadly weapons.

“I’m sorry if I sound disrespectful, but this is so cool!” Barry said. Angel noted how the boy almost looked like a kid in a candy store, but at the same time, seemed to have enough common sense not to drop the weapon he was handling so that he could go grab some others.

“Disrespectful?” Angel raised an eyebrow.

“Well, these are all dangerous weapons, sir,” Barry explained, “I’m sure they’ve saved a lot of lives. I don’t mean to marginalize that, sir, but these are so cool! Awful lot of them, though.”

Angel set the swords down on a workbench and held out his hand for the axe. Barry handed it to him carefully, Angel noted, respectful of the fact that it was a deadly weapon.

Angel just set it down next to the swords.

“Well, when you’ve faced what I’ve faced, you need as many deadly weapons as you can find. And I have a lot of deadly weapons.”

“I know!” Barry said, “Jenny said she actually helped design some! Your daughter is amazing!”

“Honestly, amazing doesn’t begin to cover it,” Angel picked up a jagged dagger that he’d taken off an enemy five years back, and examined it carefully as Barry watched, “I know most fathers would say that, but Jenny is…”

“Dad!” Jenny shouted furiously as she stomped into the room. Faith was a few steps behind, and struggled to keep from laughing.

“Jenny! Honey!” Angel fumbled with the dagger, and it slipped from his hands and hit the floor with a loud, metallic clang, “we were…talking! About you!”

“Your dad was just showing me around,” Barry said honestly.

“I’m sure,” Jenny glared daggers at her father as she took Barry under the arm, and began dragging him out, “excuse us, we have a date.”

“Be back by ten!” Angel shouted.

“Eleven!” Jenny shouted back, “that was the agreement! I have it on tape!”

“Jenny, slow down!” Barry pleaded.

“Did you do like I told you to?” Jenny asked.

“You mean play stupid?” Barry chuckled, “I didn’t have to. Your dad’s pretty nice. I mean, you hear stories about dad’s grilling the boyfriend…”

“Oh Barry,” Jenny chuckled as she leaned against her boyfriend, “don’t ever change.”

oooOOooo

“I’m a vampire, how is that not instinctively scary?” Angel muttered. He looked to Faith, “I’m scary, right? I mean, I’ve fought the Senior Partners, I’ve killed monsters and demons, how am I not scary?”

Faith couldn’t help herself. She pinched Angel’s cheek like he was a baby, “Angel, if you have to ask, you’ll never know.”

Angel batted Faith’s hand away, “Ha ha. Next time, I’ll just leave a blood stained axe by the door, that’ll do it.”

“Jenny would kill you for ruining her date and an axe,” Faith said, “don’t worry, if things get serious I’m sure you’ll figure out a way to terrify him.”

“I guess,” Angel pouted.

“Besides, I kinda like the kid,” Faith said, “given her family history, she could have done so much worse.”

“I don’t know, he seems a little thick,” Angel said.

“Jenny said he was on the chess team,” Faith said. She rubbed her chin in thought for a moment, “that kind of fits. So Jenny likes her boyfriends big, strong, smart but also really, really dumb.”

Faith looked at Angel.

“So it is true what they say about daughters.”

“What?” Angel said, “what do they say about daughters?”

Faith just walked away, chuckling to herself.

“Faith, what do they say? Faith? Faith!”

    


	24. The Cop

The Cop

Kate slapped a clip into her pistol, and glanced around the corner before turning to Jenny.

“Ear plugs?”

Jenny nodded.

“Okay, get ready to go,” Kate ordered.

“Dual wielding pistols greatly decreases accuracy and quickly depletes ammunition,” Jenny observed, “most humans don’t have the physical strength and visual tracking…”

“They’re vampires who think that bullets can’t hurt them in a narrow hallway, and we only need to make it a few yards,” Kate whispered, “get ready…”

Kate stepped out into the hall, and was met by a half dozen vampires, each with a cocky grin plastered on their face.

“Come on, human, you’d have better luck with a water gun,” said one of the vampires, “the Black Circle wants the kid. Hand her over, and we won’t drain you dry.”

“My counter offer,” Kate raised both guns, and pulled the triggers.

Kate saw the exact moment when those smug grins were wiped of the vampires faces. The bullets struck undead flesh, and the smug grins changed into painful shock. They fell backwards. Scrambling over one another as their instincts rediscovered their morality.

As the vampires fled, Jenny ran past Kate and swung the safe-room door open. Kate quickly stepped inside, and slammed the door

“That’ll hold them, right?” Kate asked.

They heard a pair of screams, followed by a string of profanity.

“Okay,” Kate holstered both guns and covered Jenny’s ears, leading her away from the door, “we’re safe for the moment, but we need to sweep the room, okay?”

Kate drew one gun, and swept both rooms. She came to the bathroom, and she nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw a shadow against the curtains. But she kept calm, and knew how to react.

_Magic doesn’t create brains_ , Kate thought to herself. She shot the vampire once in the head, and watched as the creature turned to dust.

“Clear!” Kate shouted.

“They’re still trying to make it through the door,” Jenny reported.

“Could they get to this room from underneath?” asked Kate

“No, the spell is a three hundred and sixty effect,” Jenny said, “it negates fire, lightning, most major forms of magic, poison gas, teleportation, charms…”

“I got it,” Kate said, “any idea how long until your Dad gets back?”

Jenny glanced at her phone, “According to this, given traffic conditions, I’d estimate half an hour.”

“Been in worse sieges,” Kate remarked. She slumped down in a chair facing the door, and laid one of her Glocks on the table, while keeping the other close at hand.

As good as Jenny’s bullets were for dealing with vampires, they were absolute hell on the barrels. Dirt and powder built up like no one’s business, and in Kate’s opinion not cleaning them immediately was the same as holding a blade to her neck.

“So did you leave any emergency rations?” Kate smiled at Jenny, “or did they all somehow disappear?”

“They were within three months of expiring,” Jenny said, glancing aside, “or so I heard.”

“Well, we shouldn’t be here that long,” Kate said with an easy smile, but her eyes never left the door, “you have any cards, or a game on that thing?”

“Several dozen,” Jenny said, “but…could we talk instead?”

Kate raised an eyebrow, “Sure, sweetie.”

Jenny twiddled her fingers, before she said, “Why don’t you like me?”

Kate chuckled despite herself, “Just like your dad, you don’t ask easy questions, do you?”

“Ummm…”

“It’s okay, honey,” Kate said, “what makes you think that I don’t like you?”

“You constantly talk to Angel about my living arrangements,” Jenny said, “and you question his ability to raise me.”

“Well, that’s misstating it a little,” Kate said, “you see, honey, you living here isn’t strictly legal.”

“An unjust law is no law at all,” Jenny said.

Kate rolled her eyes, “I know where you got that quote from, kiddo, and Jim Crow laws and foster care laws are two different things.”

“Angel loves me,” Jenny said softly.

“I know he does, honey, and so does Faith, and so do I,” Kate said, “but honestly, sometimes that’s not enough. You’ve been through a lot, Jenny, and if you were in foster care you would be able to get the help you need.”

“I don’t need any help,” Jenny said, half convinced.

“That’s up for debate, sweetie,” Kate said gently. She saw how Jenny recoiled at the suggestion that she wasn’t ‘well’, “most kids your age don’t eat cigarette butts.”

“…I thought they were food,” Jenny said defensively.

“Did they taste like food?” Kate asked, “and if you were hungry, why didn’t you just ask for something to eat?”

“…I didn’t want to bother anyone,” Jenny said.

“Of course,” Kate said in a practiced tone that expertly conveyed polite disbelief, “may I ask if you keep a stash of food hidden in your room?”

“No!” Jenny defended, rationalizing the answer away because she didn’t keep a stash per say, but rather cycled it out on a regular basis.

“If you say so,” Kate said. After so many years as a detective, she had gained a sixth sense when it came to answers, and she knew instinctively which ones came too fast, or with too much thought.

But at the same time, she didn’t want to really challenge Jenny’s answers either. Kids were sensitive by nature, every cop knew that, and orphans and foster kids even more so. They were aware of the world’s harsh realities, but in many ways, lacked the ability to truly cope with them. Kate only wanted to make a point, and now that she had, she knew that she’d also have to pull Jenny back off the edge.

“It’s not that I don’t think Angel, Faith and everyone else doesn’t love you as much as life itself, they do,” Kate said, “it’s that they’re not trained to provide the kind of help you need.”

“…I think they’re doing fine,” Jenny said softly.

“Of course, honey,” Kate glanced towards the reinforced door, locked shut by a deadbolt that could stop a car and strengthened further still by magic. You could barely hear the vampires trying to beat their way in, “I’m sorry if I upset you. I just want what’s best for you, believe it or not.”

Jenny looked down.

“I’m guessing not,” Kate said.

“I’m sorry, it’s just…”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m not offended,” Kate said, “I know how confusing this can be.”

“It is,” Jenny said, “the people who should have liked me hate me, and the people who are supposed to hate me love me…”

“There is no one in this world who is supposed to hate you,” Kate said sharply, “no one.”

“But…”

“Being born isn’t a crime,” Kate said, “and don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise.”

A pregnant pause hanged in the air.

“Kate?” Jenny said finally, “can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot, honey.”

“Why doesn’t anyone believe in magic?”

Kate took a second to chew over the answer. She didn’t know if Jenny was subtly asking about her own suicide attempt, or her mother’s own…issues, but either way it deserved a careful answer.

“I suppose it’s because society teaches us by omission that there’s no such thing as demons and vampires,” Kate said finally, “they’re fairy tales, the signs of an overactive imagination or a million other things. Anyone who says otherwise is just some wanna-be star trying to make a name for themselves.”

“But…even after Hell A?”

“Afraid so,” Kate shrugged, “Even after that, honey. The more outrageous something appears, the more people will deny it. I still remember a woman who went on national television and declared world peace. But if you asked anyone about it, you’d get a million different stories, government conspiracy, cult leader…”

Kate sighed.

“And honestly, learning about the supernatural doesn’t make anything better. After I learned your dad was a real, honest to God vampire, I started playing Agent Mulder…”

“Why? He’s a guy,” Jenny said.

Kate raised an eyebrow, “Oh, you actually got that reference, huh?”

“Connor and me watch X-Files on Netflix,” Jenny explained, “it’s really funny. What they get wrong about magic alone…!”

“Anyways, when I started playing Agent Mulder, for every legitimate demon or vampire I actually found, I made up at least three more,” Kate explained, “without a frame of reference to go from, solid facts to work from, I just spiraled further and further down.”

Kate took a moment to reflect on the elephant in the room, or rather, the mother. When Angel told Kate the gritty details, the former Detective honestly did her best not to ask how a mother could willingly forget her own child.

Kate now realized the question should have been, how did Fred ever reclaim her own sanity after it all? Kate knew better than most the fear and self doubt that accompanied the discovery of magic.

Fred was lost on another world, something so easy to say yet not fully understand. In her short time in Pylea, Kate observed flora she didn’t recognize, animals by way of Lovecraft and an entirely different law of physics, if the two suns and Angel not bursting into flame at the touch of daylight was any indication.

Fred was thrown into the deep end, in every way when it came to the supernatural. It came as no shock to anyone she went off the deep end mentally, though, Kate reflected, it also shouldn’t have come as any surprise that she didn’t return _whole_.

“Oh,” Jenny said.

“Most people who know about the supernatural, only know a small fragment, just a small glimpse,” said Kate, “they know enough to be scared to the point of hysteria, but little else. They’re crackpots, and I’m a little ashamed to say that I used to be one. That’s why no one listens to your dad when he talks about magic, because for every one guy who can calmly explain things, there are a dozen others who’ll scream about how they were attacked by a vampire in a dark alley, or cursed by a demon.”

“But…they were,” Jenny said, “well…probably. Isn’t that evidence enough?”

“It was dark and they were imagining things,” Kate replied, “or bad luck, or they just want attention. That’s the standard hand wave. Looking back, I know I did it a few times.”

Jenny took a moment to reflect, before she dared ask…

“So if magic, demons and stuff don’t exist in society, what about me?”

 


	25. The Dentist

Dentist

_Now_

“Hey sprout, hurry it up!” Faith yelled down the hall, “we’re not running a bus service here!”

“Faith, I’m not in any hurry,” Robin Wood said. He adjusted his collar a little and smirked, “it’s nice to be able to rock a tux at my age. I feel like James Bond.”

“Really? James Bond?”

Robin shrugged, “After years of working in England for a covert organization, I’m in the States on government business. Close enough for me.”

“Men,” Faith said, with a roll of her eyes.

“I was just finishing my makeup,” Jenny huffed. The fifteen year- old walked as quickly down the hall as her high heels would allow. She wore a strapless red dress that Lorne had bought for her, with white gloves with a black clutch.

“You look stunning, my dear,” Robin took her hand, and gave it a gentleman’s kiss, “and if I said anything more, I’d sound like a dirty old man.”

“Yeah, not bad, kiddo, not bad.”

“Thank you Mr. Wood,” Jenny took another glance at herself, and couldn’t help but ask, “you really think so?”

“Of course he does, sprout,” Faith gave Jenny a gentle punch in the arm, “wouldn’t have said it otherwise. Just calm down, you’re going to a school dance, not the dentist.”

“Oh. My God,” Jenny face-palmed, “are you ever going to stop bringing that up, ever?”

“When it stops being funny,” replied Faith.

“Whatever, _mother_ ,” Jenny took Robin’s arm, and all but dragged him out the door in a huff.

_Later_

“Houston, the eagle has landed,” Robin plopped down on the couch next to Faith.

“No screaming, then?” Faith smirked.

“Her boyfriend walked her in, and last I saw she was having the time of her life,” Robin said.

“Thanks Robin, it means a lot,” Faith said, “most everyone else is busy these days. Hell, I’m surprised they gave me the night off. I know you’re just here to liaise and all, not be a chauffeur.”

“It’s fine, I’m off the clock, and besides, tux,” Robin primped the collar, “There a reason why she didn’t want you dropping her off?”

“Girl thing,” Faith said, in a tone that made it clear she didn’t want to discuss it further.

“I see,” Robin said, “so uhh, what’s the whole thing with the dentist? Sounds like there’s a story there.”

“Oh, that!” Faith chuckled, “oh, there’s a story there, see…”

_Then_

_“You need to check her teeth and get her to a dentist, by the way. I doubt they had tooth brushes in that hell hole we took her from."_

The next day, when Angel made breakfast, a basic meal of bacon, eggs and toast, he watched Jenny carefully. And saw, to his disappointment how Kate was a hundred percent right.

Almost like she’s a detective, Angel thought to himself.

Jenny ate every scrap of food, but each bite was careful. Jenny ate the toast and bacon with the left side of her mouth, but Angel saw her tremble twice, as if she were struck with an electric current. He suspected that a bit of food fell wrong tooth at the wrong time, and rung a nerve like a bell.

Watching Jenny eat gave Angel an odd sense of déjà vu. It’d been over a hundred years since Angel had seen anything like, in a time when dental care was less than advanced, and people had to take care in how they ate. But if you knew what to look for, it was like a neon sign.

“I’ll clean up,” Jenny said, without being asked or told.

“Just leave it for a second sweetie, and come here,” Angel said.

Jenny approached dutifully.

“Open your mouth, please.”

“…why?” Jenny tried to say, without trembling.

“I just need to check your teeth,” Angel explained.

Jenny opened her mouth, and what Angel saw wasn’t much surprising. Her teeth, of which she had far too few for a girl of her age, were in terrible shape. They were all discolored, several were chipped, and the rest…

“Okay,” Angel sighed, “not great, but fixable. As luck would have it, I know a guy.”

“Fixable?” Jenny said.

“Yeah,” Angel mussed Jenny’s hair, and smiled at her brightly, “don’t worry about it, okay?”

Jenny nodded, and then quickly turned her head and went about clearing the table, so that Angel couldn’t see her eyes glistening with tears.

_Later_

Jenny swallowed when she saw the dentist chair. Nothing about it said to her good dental health. All she saw was a chair that forced her to bear her entire front, from her neck on down. The ‘Doctor’ seemed polite, with his bright smile and purple skin, but then, Jenny remembered, the worse people always seemed polite.

Faith and Angel stood behind her, trying to be a comforting presence, but to Jenny they were still strangers. Strangers that cared about her for some odd reason, but strangers all the same.

“Hello Jenny, my name’s Dr. Harrow,” the good doctor made a point of shaking Jenny’s trembling hand, “I know you’re scared, but trust me, these things are always seem scarier than they actually are. In two hours, you’ll have a smile as bright as the sun.”

Faith took a glance around his office, and saw a series of runes that encircled the chair.

“Now when you say shine…”

“Figure of speech,” Dr. Harrow said.

“Good to know,” Faith thumbed to Angel, “he tans easily.”

“We’ll be right outside,” Angel said to Jenny.

The Slayer and vampire slumped down on the waiting room couch.

A minute passed.

“So…” Faith started, “how do you know a magic dentist? Vampire thing?”

“When I was the CEO of Wolfram and Hart, actually,” Angel said, “he was on a black list, though considering how Wolfram and Hart runs their business, he was really on a white hat list. They didn’t care for him providing cheap healthcare for demons and such, mainly because he was also a customer of theirs.”

“Customer?”

Angel coughed under his breath, “And his spells require dolphin blood.”

Faith raised an eyebrow at Angel, then shrugged, “Eh, I never liked Flipper anyways.”

“Anyways, I removed him from the list in exchange for a long term contract with a high monthly stipend. Was maybe one of five good things I did as CEO there,” Angel sighed.

“Least the money was good,” Faith quipped.

“There was that,” Angel muttered. He did his best not to think about his time in Wolfram and Hart. To him, it symbolized nearly the end of both his family and mission, all because his eyes were bigger than his stomach.

Angel was spared further brooding when he heard Jenny screaming. Both slayer and vampire leapt to their feet, and were through the door in seconds. Jenny was in the corner, tears falling as she tried to make herself smaller.

“What the hell?” Faith said eloquently.

“I don’t know,” Dr. Harrow shrugged, “I had just finished the anesthesia spell, and then she started screaming!”

“Please, don’t!” Jenny begged, “I’ll be better, I shwear!”

“Hey, calm down, sprout,” Faith knelt down in front of Jenny, “and explain what the heck you think is going on here, okay?”

_Now_

“So what was she so scared of?” asked Robin.

“Well, her mouth wasn’t working right, so it took some doing to calm her down and get the story out of her, and, well…”, Faith shook her head, “Apparently, they used to use a poison on disobedient slaves that would paralyze their mouth, so that they couldn’t eat or drink, or swallow. After they administered the poison, they’d then work the slave even harder and…”

Faith’s voice trailed off. Robin knew from experience that the less Faith actually said about Jenny’s abusive past, the better. Faith only had any skill in dealing with it when it came to helping Jenny.

“God damn,” Robin muttered under his breath, “so how’d you calm her down?”

_Then_

“Hey, calm down,” Faith placed her hands under Jenny’s arm’s, and hefted her into a standing position, “come on kid, you’re smarter than that. You gotta know that if we wanted to kill you, we’d do it a lot quicker than that.”

“Faith!” Angel protested, but Faith motioned for him to be silent.

“I mean, look at all the weapons we got,” Faith said, “why drag you all the way out here?”

“Make…me me an ehample?” Jenny slurred, but she didn’t much believe it. The way Faith was treating her, gently, politely, allowed her terror to subside somewhat, and the wheels in her brain began spinning.

And the more she thought about it, the more she realized just how right Faith was. It was well within their ability to kill her at anytime, anywhere they saw fit. But when they’d ventured here, it was still daylight out. Jenny couldn’t think of any master who’d risk death so casually just to punish one slave.

“Shorry,” Jenny said softly.

“We just wanna help you,” Faith said, then gave Jenny a toothy smile, “get your chompers like this, see?”

Jenny nodded.

“Just trust us for the next two hours, okay?”

Jenny nodded, though she was only half convinced.

_Later_

“All done!” Dr. Harrow stepped out, with Jenny right behind him.

“See kid, what’d I tell ya?”

Jenny didn’t immediately reply, she was too busy picking at the braces Dr. Harrow had given her. Faith chuckled as Jenny seemed incapable of keeping her hand out of her mouth, picking at the braces and no doubt trying to discern how they worked.

“Come back in a week, and we can remove the braces. In the meantime, make sure she brushes morning, noon and night and floss,” Dr. Harrow said, “good dental care is pretty universal.”

“Will do doc,” Faith took Jenny’s hand, though the young girl barely noticed. Nothing could seem to draw her attention away from the mystic braces that had restored her teeth.

_Now_

“Man, I knew doctor visits were no fun, but wow…,” Robin whistled.

“Yeah, fun time had by all,” Faith said.

“Wait…so lemmie get this straight. Jenny thought you guys were going to kill her when you took her to the dentist.”

“Yup.”

“And because of that, you make fun of her.”

Faith snickered, “Yeah.”

She saw the look on Robin Wood’s face.

“What?”

Notes: So yeah, this idea has been bouncing around in my head for a while (read back, you’ll see the references). But I’ve played the whole ‘Jenny panics because of a cultural misunderstanding’ card a few times already, and I may again. But I wanted this one to be different. Hope you enjoyed it!

 

 

 


	26. Girl Talk 2

Girl Talk

 

_Los Angeles Federal Bureau of Supernatural Intervention_

Jenny pressed ‘save’ on her file, and closed the document.

“Finally,” Jenny sighed, and leaned back in her chair. She thought back to all of her family’s stories, how they cleared out vampire nests, defeated The Beast and crippled the Senior Partners.

And not once did they ever tell a story about the adventures of God damn paperwork.

“Okay,” Jenny heard her joints snap as she stood up. She’d set aside the entire day to catch up on her paperwork, and now her sore body was reminding her of it. She didn’t need to exercise per say, but that didn’t mean her body was built for sitting for hours on end, “just call Liam, and….”

Jenny froze when she heard her phone ring. She looked at it, and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that it was her non-emergency line. The call had likely been cycled to her automatically, and would turn over to another desk when she didn’t answer.

“Sorry, I’ve got a date tonight.”

And with the floor being empty, she felt absolutely no shame at not answering her phone. God knew she’d done enough for the agency, twice over.

The phone stopped ringing, just like Jenny knew it would.

And then her cell phone.

“Damn it!” Jenny shouted, before answering her phone, “Agent Burkle here.”

“Hey, agent beautiful!”

“Liam!” Jenny beamed, then the wheels in her brain turned, “…you’re not going to be able to make our date tonight, are you?”

“Sorry, honey,” Liam said, “hostage situation, and I’m on SWAT rotation. Rain check?”

“Rain check,” Jenny muttered. She’d slogged all day through her backlog, using the date as her light at the end of the tunnel. It was childish, perhaps, but _paperwork_ …

“Thanks, babe, I’ll make it up to you, I promise!”

Jenny sighed, and though she loved Liam, she half expected that it would turn out to be an empty promise. They were two professionals in law enforcement, for pete’s sake. They both kept odd hours, though if Jenny was being honest with herself, that was part of the appeal. He understood instinctively why she couldn’t just ‘call in sick’. There were precious few things in her line of work that could be passed off to a coworker, morally and ethically.

Liam understood that.

Precious few boyfriends before him did.

And as if to remind Jenny of her always present responsibilities, her cell-phone rang. This time she recognized the ringtone as her professional, non emergency number (Jenny had a lot of numbers and ringtones).

“Agent Burkle,” she answered.

“Hello Agent Burkle, this is Dr. Strohm at the Department of Supernatural Care. Do you have a moment to talk?”

“I’m free,” Jenny sighed.

“I was wondering if you could come by my office? In an unofficial capacity,” Dr. Strohm said.

“May I ask why?”

“We’re treating a young woman, a Kru-culler,” Dr. Strohm replied, “she was brought in by a specialist who recommended we contact you.”

“Who was the specialist, if I may ask?” Jenny already suspected a trap, but hope springs eternal.

Dr. Strohm told her. Jenny’s curiosity was peaked.

“I can be there in thirty minutes,” said Jenny.

“Thank you. No need to rush,” said the Doctor, “we have her restrained, and we’re still making…umm, the stew.”

_Later, Department of Supernatural Care_

As Jenny waited in the lobby, she took the opportunity to look around. The name, ‘Department of Supernatural Care’, certainly seemed to imply that it was a government organization, but that was far from the truth.

Ever since magic and everything that went with it became public and ‘official’, dozens upon dozens of research companies popped up overnight, hoping to find or create any magical miracle cure that could be mass produced and sold for a fortune.

Gunn compared them to the dot.com bubble, only they kept popping up for years until the government instituted several regulations. That stamped down on most of them, from the scientists who had no idea what they were doing, to the start-ups that were trying to replace Wolfram and Hart, and your just plain maniacs.

The organizations that survived were mostly legitimate research facilities or rehabilitation dedicated to the slow study of magic. Mostly.

Jenny only had to wait a few minutes before an orderly greeted her, and asked Jenny to follow her. He left Jenny in a room with a double sided mirror, with a young woman strapped to a steel chair on the other side.

There were three men in there with her, with a metal gurney, with a steel pot resting on it, bubbling with steam.

Jenny, knowing the contents, was glad there was a wall between it and her. She knew from experience that the smell, and the cooking, was enough to make her lose her appetite.

“Agent Burkle, thank you for coming,” Dr. Strohm said as he entered the room.

Jenny shook his hand, “Anything I can do to help. So how old is this Kru-culler?” Jenny said.

“This is actually her first emergence of the curse,” said Dr. Strohm, “for fear of stating the obvious, we worry today may have been especially traumatic for her. Normally, we bring in grief counselors, but the man who, umm…brought her in suggested that it may be best that you talk to her.”

Jenny raised an eyebrow, “He did, did he?”

“It’s not a problem, is it?”

Jenny shook her head, “No problem at all. We’ve just been having some…disagreements lately.”

Dr. Strohm could tell from her tone that he shouldn’t pry. Instead, he gestured to the glass.

“They’re about to begin.”

Jenny and Dr. Strohm became silent as the men in the other room went to work.

The young woman in the chair began to scream in a language Jenny had only heard once before, and she began throwing her head back as her body began to change. Her nails began to lengthen until they reached the size and shape of knives. Her jaw became unhinged like that of a python, and her teeth began tipping out of her mouth, as if they’d suddenly become unhinged. They were replaced with jagged, razor sharp teeth until her mouth resembled a parody of a shark’s.

The young woman would have been terrifying, if she weren’t restrained and sobbing like a newborn.

Two of the men took up positions to the left and right of the young woman, wearing specially reinforced hazmat suits. They reached down, and grabbed the sides of her mouth, and pulled.

The young woman’s mouth stretched like taffy, and while her teeth were sharp enough to score bone, the men were protected.

The last man picked up the steaming pot, stepped towards the young woman, and tipped the pot into the young woman’s outstretched mouth. He did so carefully and deliberately, like he was pouring spaghetti into a strainer.

“The poor young woman,” Dr. Strohm sighed.

“She’s luckier than the first Kru-culler I met,” said Jenny.

“Dare I ask…?”

“Well before the amnesty, in England,” Jenny said, “I imagine you can figure out how it ended.”

“I can indeed,” said Dr. Strohm, “but if it means anything, your research was invaluable in treatment. We’ve been treating her mother pretty successfully…”

“Her mother?” Jenny asked, “so that’s how they knew.”

“Correct,” said Dr. Strohm.

_Later_

The treatment had taken about half an hour. When it was done, Jenny was led to the young woman’s treatment room (really a polite term for a holding cell, Jenny thought), and Dr. Strohm wished her luck.

“Be careful,” said the Doctor, “she’s not violent, well…besides the obvious, but…”

“I’ve been doing stuff like this since I came to this world,” Jenny said with a good natured smile, “I can handle a teenager with a curse.”

Jenny’s smile disappeared when she stepped into the room. The young woman was bent over the toilet, dry heaving.

“Amy?” Jenny walked towards the young woman, and placed her hands on her shoulder. Without waiting for a reaction, she nudged the woman away from the toilet, “I know it’s beyond disgusting, Amy, but you need to keep that crap inside you.”

“Leave me alone!” Amy tried to pull away, but Jenny’s grip was too strong. The young hybrid brought Amy to the room’s bed, and sat her down. Jenny observed the woman’s black eye, but said nothing about it, “who the hell are you, and why am I here?!”

“Amy, lets be honest, I think you know the answer to both questions,” Jenny said.

“…this is all a terrible dream,” Amy said, “this can’t be happening…”

“I’m afraid it is,” Jenny said, “I know this is a lot to take in.”

“A lot?!” Amy snapped, “my life is ruined! I’m a God damned monster! My life is over!”

“It’s a little early to say that,” Jenny said, “it’s a cold comfort, but yours is not the worse curse out there.”

“What, like being green?” Amy snapped, “how does that even compare to… to…”

Amy struggled to find the words.

“Honestly, you’d be surprised,” Jenny said.

“So says the world famous CSI cop,” Amy spat.

“I didn’t start out start out Jenny Burkle, super cop,” said Jenny, “as a matter of fact, I didn’t even start out on this planet. I was literally born in a barn in another world, kiddo.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” Amy spat.

“Everything,” Jenny said, “you think no one will want you if they know about your curse? Well, wanna know what my family first knew about me?”

“What?”

“Well, when they first saw me, they knew I was a half demon, that my father raped my mother, who by the way was long dead, and that my mother never once spoke of me,” Jenny said, “they knew I was a slave, knew I was beaten on a regular basis, hell, all they had to do was look at me to se that I had more baggage than an airliner.”

“So what?”

Jenny smiled, proud of her father, of her family, “So they knew all that, but they didn’t know my name. And you know what? That was all they cared about.”

“This is different,” Amy sniffed.

“Yeah, they took in an abused child because she shared the blood of a friend, and raised me,” Jenny said, “not saying things will be a walk in the park for you, but if there’s one thing life has taught me?

“It’s that no matter how bad things are, no matter how terrible life gets, there are always people out there who care. People who will do right because it is right. My family taught me that, and I’m sure in time, you could teach your own family that.”

Amy said nothing, but Jenny thought she saw the young girl nod. She allowed it to sink in for a moment, before she continued.

“But before we get to that, we have to talk about tonight,” Jenny said, “specifically, what the hell were you thinking?”

“Excuse me?!”

Jenny narrowed her eyes at the young woman, “Do you expect me to believe for one minute that you didn’t know about your family curse? You could have killed someone!”

“I didn’t, I swear!”

Jenny gave Amy a hard look, “Oh really? Or did you hide your head in the sand, and think you could take amnesty afterwards?”

“I have no idea what…!”

“I looked it up,” Jenny said, “I know your mother took amnesty. You know what that means, right?”

Amy opened her mouth, to tell Jenny that she was wrong, but her words fell short.

“It means she went out at one night, just like you did,” Jenny said, “and someone else paid the price. And I bet your mom thinks about that every day. How else do you think she was so prepared for you doing the same?”

“I just…” Amy swallowed, “I’ve read about vampires and demons in the paper and online, but I never thought it’d be like this! That it could happen to me! I’m a normal person!”

“Well, it did,” Jenny squeezed Amy’s hand gently, “but that doesn’t mean it’s the end. There are dozens of agencies that will help you manage this, including mine. You’re a lot luckier than your mother, in that regard.”

“I hardly feel lucky,” Amy muttered.

“That crap they shoved down your throat? It will keep your curse dormant, and no, it’s not soylent green,” Jenny said.

“Soylent what?”

Jenny rolled her eyes. No one seemed to remember the classics these days.

“Just think of it as soy that magic thinks is meat,” Jenny said.

“It’s still disgusting,” Amy said.

“But it’s better than hobo chow,” Jenny said, “and if you thought that you could get amnesty, kid, you’re dead wrong. That offer expired a decade ago. You should know better. And because you didn’t, I have to add your name will be added to a watch list for the next fifteen years. One slip up, and they will throw the book at you.”

“I never thought…”

“No, you didn’t,” Jenny interrupted, “and what’s happening to you know is horrible, I know, but while it’s something you have to always live with, it’s not something you’ll always have to confront. Until I was fourteen, my parents taught me never to call the police. I have to wear water proof make-up because at least once a week someone asshole splashes me with Holy water.”

“…I’m sorry,” Amy said, “you’re right. I didn’t think, and I could have killed someone…”

“Well, you were lucky to have family who cared enough to be careful,” Jenny cupped Amy’s chin, and examined her back eye, “and they were smart enough to hire someone who could stop you before you crossed a line. If that had happened, we’d be having an entirely different conversation.”

Amy nodded. The idea that she might have killed someone simply because she couldn’t accept that she had a family curse felt worse now than the curse ever did.

“But it didn’t,” Jenny said, “the people here know what they’re doing. You need to let them finish. I gave them my contact information, and they’ll call me when they’re done. I’ll walk you through what comes next.”

“…am I going to jail?” Amy asked.

“Think of it as probation,” Jenny said, “I won’t rake you over the coals, but I have to make sure you’re aware of the consequences if you don’t take responsibility for your curse, understand? It’s no different than someone who has AIDS. You have to take responsibility for keeping yourself, and others, safe.”

“I understand,” Amy said, “thank you, by the way. I know I screwed up, it’s just…”

“I know, it’s a lot to take in,” Jenny said, “like I said, I gave the doctors my contact information. If you want to talk, feel free to call, okay?”

“Okay.”

Jenny gave Amy’s shoulder a gentle squeeze, “It’s been a long day, why don’t you get some rest? You have to stay locked up for a few days, but tomorrow the doctor’ll have some DVDs and books brought in.”

“I’ll try to think of it as a lame vacation,” Amy forced herself to chuckle, “with the worst food ever. Hey, umm, Agent Jenny? Can I ask a favor?”

“Only if you call me Jenny,” she said, “what do you need?”

“Can you tell my mom I’m sorry?” Amy said, “I know hiring that guy wasn’t cheap, and I know she must be worried…”

“You can tell her yourself,” Jenny said, “you’re not in prison, sweetie. Just detained until you’re no longer a threat.”

“I know,” Amy winced, “but after causing all this trouble, I’d rather face prison than her.”

“Well, can’t help you there,” Jenny said, “but she’s family. Even when you’re part, you’re still together.”

“I suppose. Good night, Jenny.”

“’Nite, Amy. Any bed bugs bite, bite back!”

Amy smirked at the joke before attempting to scowl, and Jenny took comfort in that Amy at least had some humor for the situation.

Jenny closed the door, and heard the familiar flap of a leather duster.

“’ello, luv,” Spike said, “so how’s the little bird?”

“She knows she screwed up,” Jenny said, “but no damage done, to her or anyone else.”

Jenny gave Spike a serious look.

“Right?”

“Right,” Spike said, “she scared a guy real bad, though. But Kru-Cullers have a glass jaw, ironic eh?”

“Well, I can justify soft balling her on the watch list,” Jenny said, “well done. Though I imagine it wasn’t cheap.”

“Cheaper than a lawyer,” Spike said, “a man’s got to eat. Even if that man is a vampire.”

“Speaking of eating, you want to come by sometime next week?” Jenny offered, “I’ve got some aged otter’s blood, and…”

Spike raised an eyebrow, “You ready to have that talk?”

“Spike, you’re over-react…”

“I’m busy, sorry, luv,” Spike said, and spun on his heel.

“Fine, see you around,” Jenny growled despite herself. She had always known that Spike had a bit of a drama queen in him, and after the long day she’d had, Jenny had no patience for it. She was upset sure, but that was family.

They were together, even when apart.  



	27. The Black Circle Part 1

Black Circle 1

Lies my Parents Told Me

“Jenny, just stay calm, everything will be okay. Just trust me and be brave, alright?”

Jenny Burkle nodded numbly. She knew Angel was trying to reassure her, and she struggled to believe him.

It wasn’t easy.

The fact that he was bound to a chair with heavy chains and a containment spell designed to hold a vampire for over a hundred years had something to do with it. As did the four grappler demons that waited patiently in the corner of the room.

“Now Angel, be fair, she has reason to be scared, and I’m sorry about that.”

“If you’re that sorry about it, Eve, you should just let her go. Bad enough we missed the hockey game, no reason to make her stay up late too.”

Eve, the once liaison to the Senior Partners, crooked her head at Angel with a practiced smile.

“Don’t you mean let us go?”

Angel shook his head, “I’m not naïve enough to believe for one second that you won’t kill me for what I did to Lindsey. Fine, alright. But leave Jenny out of it, she had nothing to do with it.”

“Eve, please don’t hurt him,” Jenny begged, “you said you were my friend!”

“I’m still your friend Jenny,” Eve said, “this isn’t about Angel, honey, this is about you. I need your help.”

“Me?” Jenny did a double take, and then scowled. Her head hadn’t quite caught up with her emotions, but it only took her a second to realize that she now had some power in this affair, and her anger washed over, “you lied to me! You hurt Angel! Why would I ever help you?!”

“Because it’s the right thing to do. I did lie to you sweetheart, and I’m sorry,” Eve replied, “in fact, a lot of people have lied to you. It’s the way of adults. None of us like it, but sometimes it’s what we’re forced to do. Sometimes we even lie to the ones we love the most, even Angel.”

“Angel would never do that!” Jenny snapped.

“I’m sorry to tell you he already has,” Eve said, “For instance, has Angel ever told you the lies he spread about your mother?”

“Eve…”

Angel felt the words die in his throat as Jenny snapped his head in his direction. Angel had come to respect, but mostly fear, his adopted daughter’s intuition. She had an insight into things that bordered a sixth sense, a gift for insight that had served her well as a slave, but refused to vanish now that she was free. But at the same time, Angel had come to learn how Jenny rarely had the ability to process what she’d deduced.

Because no matter how smart Jenny was, she was still just a child.

And Angel realized almost instantly, that even a child would have seen his silence as damning.

“Don’t listen to her,” Angel said, “she’s just twisting things around.”

“I think she deserves the truth, Angel,” Eve snapped her fingers, and one of the Grappler demons brought Eve a carved, ivory box. Eve opened it up, and removed a silver spider and glass ring from within, “and I intend to see that she gets it.”

“This was created by West African shamans during colonization, they call it the ‘Bite of Truth’,” Eve said, “they needed to ensure that their secrets never fell into the white man’s hands, and to do that, they needed to be able to get at the truth.”

Eve reached through the containment spell around Angel as if it weren’t even there, and placed the silver spider on his shoulder. The metal insect creaked, and then scurried down Angel’s arm before coming to a rest on his wrist.

“So they created this. The spider compels it’s victim to answer any question asked of them truthfully, so long as the person asking is wearing this ring,” Eve raised her middle finger at Angel, and slid the ring over it.

“Eve, you’re crossing a line with me,” Angel growled.

“Noted,” Eve shrugged, “now tell us Angel, did you claim credit for Fred’s death? Did you make people believe that you were responsible for Illyria killing her?”

Jenny looked at Eve, baffled, but when she heard nothing from Angel, from her adopted father, a cold fear gripped her.

“Angel? Dad, what is she talking about…?”

Angel gritted his teeth. When he realized he couldn’t fight the urge to speak, he decided instead to choose his words with care, “Jenny, please understand, I would never hurt Fred. But…but I spread word that I was responsible for Illyria infecting her, that it was my doing. I needed the Circle of the Black Thorn to believe it, and for that Spike, Lorne and Gunn had to be convinced too.”

“How could you do something like that?” Jenny looked at Angel, “how could you twist her memory like that?”

“Jenny…”

“You let that thing! That thing keep her body!” hot tears fell down Jenny’s cheek, “and then you lie about her memory! I thought you were a hero!”

“It was the only way to give her death a purpose,” Angel said gently, “to make it count, instead of being some horrible accident. I needed it to get close to the Circle, to end their threat.”

“He’s right, Jenny,” said Eve, “the Circle of the Black Thorn were the most powerful evil on the face of the planet. Angel gave your mother’s death meaning, Jenny.”

“He used her memory like a tool, like a thing!” Jenny hissed. She looked at Angel, her eyes wet, and pointed an accusing finger at him, “how dare you!”

Angel swallowed hard. He didn’t have to wonder how his deception hurt Jenny. Before he’d taken her in, the little girl had absolutely nothing. No heirlooms, no property, just _memories_. He suspected that Jenny saw lying about Fred’s death as little different from desecrating her corpse, reasons be damned.

“And she would have wanted him to,” Eve placed a reassuring hand over Jenny’s, “I know it’s hard to understand, but sometimes things aren’t as simple as others would have us believe. Adults have to make hard choices, where no matter what happens someone gets hurt. Tell us Angel, did you do everything you could to save Fred, to save Jenny’s mother?”

“Yes,” Angel forced himself to say, though the effort was harder than twisting steel. But the silver spider on his wrist sank its legs into the vampire’s undead flesh, and pain lanced through Angel’s body as he found his mouth beginning to move of its own free will.

“…no,” Angel said finally, and Jenny’s heart felt like it was going into freefall.

“At the Deeper Well, I had the chance to draw Illyria out of Fred, to put her back in her prison,” Angel explained, “but Illyria would have fought back, and killed thousands doing so. I couldn’t do that, I couldn’t kill so many, even for Fred.”

“And if he had, Fred would never have been able to live with the guilt,” said Eve, “it would have destroyed her worse than anything Illyria did. I knew your mother, Jenny, trust me when I say she would have made the exact same choice as Angel.”

In her head, Jenny knew Angel made the right choice. The lives of thousands could never be balanced against one, no matter who that one might be. And in truth, the fact that Angel ‘let’ her mother die wasn’t even that upsetting. Jenny had come to terms with her death long before she was actually dead.

No, what hurt the most was that fate seemed to be laughing at her again, dangling salvation for her mother just out of reach, just like how her rescue, her freedom, had only come after her mother was long gone.

“One last question, Angel,” Eve said, “do you think that you can ever be redeemed for your sins?”

Angel clenched his jaw, but he could feel the magic shooting through his muscles, rummaging through his mind, and quicker than he thought possible, Angel said, “No.”

Jenny looked at Eve then Angel, confused. Angel had once warned her about Angelus, about what would happen if he ever lost his soul, but to Jenny that information was academic.

Angel loved her. He saved her, and countless others. He fought to protect others, and do right because it was right. How could he not see that he was already redeemed?

But then, Jenny remembered, he lied to her. About Illyria then and he used her mother’s memory as a tool. Jenny’s world felt as if it were spinning out of control, out of her understanding, and the anger of a painful lifetime began to bubble over.

“Why are you doing this?” Jenny growled at Eve, “what do you want from me?”

“I want you to understand that the world isn’t simple black and white, Jenny,” Eve explained, “you’re right, I did lie to you. So did Angel. And neither of you are here because of your own free will. You’re here because I need your help. The Black Circle needs your help.”

“You’re delusional if you think you can take up those reigns,” Angel spat, “the Senior Partners would never accept you as their new agents on earth, even if they remotely trusted you.”

“See, Angel, that’s where you’re wrong,” Eve said, “we’re not looking to restart Wolfram and Hart, or recreate the Circle of the Black Thorn. We’re looking to destroy them, and everything they represent.”

“…what?”

“Remember Jenny, how I said the world isn’t black and white?” Eve said, “well, the Black Circle isn’t made of people who worship the Wolf, Ram and Hart. We’re their victims, their slaves and we want to fight back.”

“You’re not slaves,” Jenny growled, “your stomach’s full, you have no scars, no fear, your body doesn’t ache, you live in this world…!”

“Not all slaves are equal, but are still slaves. You should know that better than anyone,” Eve said softly. Despite herself, Jenny flinched inside, “but we have chains on us too, even if you can’t see them. Angel bought us some freedom, but it won’t last. Eventually our old masters will come for us, and we’ll have to fight back, surrender and be enslaved, or die. Those are our only choices. And we’d rather fight back, like your father.”

Angel fumed, but he could feel an undercurrent of magic that kept his jaw wired shut. Apparently, not only could Eve force him to speak the truth, he couldn’t speak at all unless she willed it.

“You know what it’s like, Jenny, to be made so small, to be made a thing,” Eve said softly.

Jenny felt her anger beginning to fade slowly into sympathy. Her neck itched, and her back tingled.

“I know you have little reason to trust me, but I swear, if I could have just asked you to do this, I would have,” Eve said, “your father is a good man, he really is, but he’s not perfect. If I hadn’t lied, he never would have let me near you otherwise. You see, sometimes, no matter how many times he says people can redeem themselves, he still thinks in the back of his mind that anything born in evil can only ever be evil.”

Angel would have torn Eve’s head from her shoulders if he could.

“We can prove him wrong, show him that everyone can be saved,” Eve said, “but we need your help.”

“You’ll kill us,” Jenny said, “even if you are my friend, it’s logical. Angel would hunt you down, and you know it.”

“I promise you, help us and I can convince my partners to let you both leave here alive,” Eve said, “the Wolf Ram and Hart didn’t get to be the greatest power in dozens of dimensions by being nice. They have hundreds of enemies, and to take them down we need every last one. Your dad included.”

“I don’t…”

“Jenny, I was created in a lab, for the purpose of being the mouth piece of three demons,” said Eve, “please, I want to be more, help me be more. Help me be better than that.”

“…I…alright,” Jenny looked at Angel and met his eyes, “Dad, I know you don’t agree, but I have to do this. I have to help them.”

Angel felt the magic that had forced him into silence lessen, but Eve gave him a coy wink.

“Jenny, you and Connor are the most important people in my life,” Angel said, “please, believe me when I say you can’t trust them.”

“I have to help them,” Jenny said, “if you don’t trust them, please, trust me.”

Angel was silent, but not willingly.

“What do you need me to do?”

Eve snapped her fingers, and Angel’s former secretary, Harmony, walked into the room.

“O.M.G!” Harmony squealed, “she looks so much like her! Eve, isn’t she just as cute as a button?”

“Harmony,” Eve said, in a tone that said ‘shut up’, “could you take Jenny to the lab we set up, and let her get started?”

“Sure, boss lady,” Harmony offered her hand to Jenny. The little green girl took it with a good deal of reluctance, and only after she convinced herself that they wouldn’t allow a vampire to eat before she started her work.

“Well,” Eve clapped her hands together after Jenny left, and nodded to Angel, “I think that went well, don’t you?”

Angel felt the magic that silenced him disappear, but remained silent for several seconds. He had far too much to say, to say the wrong thing.

“You’re good,” Angel said finally, “you can play a child like a fiddle. Maybe one day you’ll move up to teenagers.”

“Mad that I tarnished her image of you as a hero?” Eve smirked, “it’s not like I told her how you killed Drogyn, an old friend in cold blood to trick the Circle into accepting you. Or how you left a room of humans to be butchered by your old girl friends. Or how you willfully tried to lose your own soul. Or how you stabbed the man I loved in the back. Or, well, it’s a long, long list with you, isn’t it ‘champion’?”

“You wouldn’t have done that,” Angel said confidently, “you needed to tear me down to Jenny so that she’d have the courage to choose you over me, but only so much. So you told her about how I was forced to allow Fred to die to demonstrate a hard choice I was forced to make. And you played on my self-doubt to echo hers. And when you were done with that, you offered her a chance to prove nature wrong, to help someone so much like herself.”

Eve raised an eyebrow, “So, there is some Angelus still in there, huh?”

Angel shrugged, “Always is. Understanding how to tear people down isn’t that helpful when you’re trying to lift people up.”

“No, I imagine not,” Eve said.

“Eve, I need you to understand something…”

“Death threat in three…two…”

“I understand that you’re not like a vampire, not like some demons who can’t change their behavior, what they are,” Angel explained, “you can make a choice to be who and what you want to be. You proved that to me and the world when you chose Lindsey, chose love, over your creators.”

“Don’t even talk about him,” Eve snapped, “you used him like a tool and then threw him away when you were done!”

“I understand that you can choose to be who you are,” Angel said, as if he hadn’t heard a thing Eve said, “I know that, and I want you to know I know. Because, manipulating my family like this? Twisting someone good and pure like Jenny for your own ends? I will kill you for that. You can run, you can hide, you can beg, hell, you could even try surrendering, but ultimately I will end you. And the last coherent thought that will go through your mind? It will be, ‘Wow, Drusilla got off easy’.”

“Wow, aren’t we dark? You do know that Jenny isn’t your daughter,” Eve said, “in fact, one of the plans we bounced around was simply calling social services and taking her from her foster home. But that would have gotten too messy.”

“Even if Fred were alive and with us here today, Jenny would still be a part of my family,” Angel hissed, “and I would still kill you for using her like this.”

“Brave words for a man bound to a chair surrounded by a containment spell,” Eve observed.

“To be honest, I don’t feel that brave,” Angel confessed, “in fact, I’m actually terrified.”

Eve looked at the ring, and then to Angel.

“Is this thing in the fritz?” Eve wondered aloud, “good thing it waited.”

“Who wouldn’t be terrified?” Angel said, “I smelled Spanky and Corbin Fries when you brought us in. Them, and Harmony, they’re your legion of evil super friends, right?”

“Hey, you almost made a modern pop culture reference. An old dog can learn new tricks. And if you must know, it’s them and a few others,” Eve admitted, “Wolfram and Hart is in shambles, and we’re poised to pick up the pieces.”

“See, what scares me is that your people are ruthless, greedy idiots and that’s all you are,” Angel explained, “you’re not the new rising power, you’re little kids with firearms. You’re idiots playing the part of the big bad, and all that means is that your plans are going to fail in a spectacular fashion, because none of you are half as dangerous as you think you are. Which, ironically, makes you twice as dangerous as you should be.”

“You vastly underestimate…”

“Angel! Eve! Can you believe how cute Fred and Lorne’s daughter is?” Harmony strolled into the room, “honestly, I never would have pegged them as a couple! And secret love child? That is so soap opera!”

Eve gritted her teeth as Angel smirked, “She’s just a useful idiot.”

“And the only vampire stupid enough to agree to your reality show idea, correct?”

“…correct.”

“Hey, I’m right here!”

“Just pray I get to you first,” said Angel, “because Faith? Spike? What they lack in creativity they make up for in brutality. Connor’s a rookie when it comes to torture to be honest and I’m actually kinda proud of that, but he’s a quick study and you’re using his little sister. Gunn and Kate, they might be quick, but our SOP for unknown demons is fire. And Illyria? Well, she’s in a league all her own.”

“I was in LA when the Senior Partners sent it to hell,” Eve spat, “you think you could do anything worse than what the Senior Partners did to me?”

“Oh, we will find out. You have my sworn word.”

Eve trembled, “You know why Jenny agreed to help me? Because I asked and because I listened to her. I listened when she explained how it felt when they whipped her, when the slaves around her spat on her. I listened and I held her hand as she cried! I earned her trust, Angel and that’s what gets you the most, isn’t it?”

Angel said nothing.

“Wow,” Harmony said, “I…uhh, I’m gonna step outside.”

“You give her a roof and food, and you think that makes you a good parent,” Eve smirked, “she’s just a trinket to you, isn’t she? A little Fred that will let you redeem yourself for letting her die in agony.”

“And you think insulting my parenting skills will make Lindsey’s death hurt less,” replied Angel, “how’s that working out for you?”

“I told you not to talk about him,” Eve growled.

“Even as bad as he was, even he had limits,” Angel said, “do you even know what you did?”

“Start down the road to victory?” said Eve, “do what you never could?”

“Close, in a way,” Angel sighed, “see, I’ve tried, so very hard, to raise Jenny to be her own person. I’ve never told her how to feel about Fred. I’ve done everything I can do teach Jenny self respect, to assure her that how she was born doesn’t matter to her or us, and to stand as her own person.”

“And I suppose you want some Nobel peace prize for that?”

“Smirk all you want,” Angel said, “but because of you, her first time asserting herself, her first major act of free will, is hurting her family. And she’s not doing it for the sake of a cause, or for the man she loves. She’s doing it because she’s being tricked by someone she thinks is a friend. Because of you, betrayal is her first meaningful act of free will. How do you think that will impact her, growing up?”

Eve was silent.

“Actually, maybe I was wrong. Maybe you really are a monster who just can’t help herself.”

“Shut. Up.”

“I knew Lindsey, better than you ever did. He had his limits, and he’d never exploit a child like this. Wherever he is now, he’s more disgusted with you than he ever was with me.”

Eve clenched her fists, then relaxed.

“Nice try, Angel, but I’m not going to end you. Not yet. Not until you see your daughter give us everything we need to bring down you and the Senior Partners. So get comfortable. You have a front row seat to your daughter changing a balance of power that’s lasted for tens of thousands of years,” Eve said, “aren’t you excited?”    


	28. The Black Circle Part 2

Black Circle 2

Family Friends

“So you’re supposed to be my assistant?”

Dr. Gregson looked at Jenny with pure distain. He had been a meta-scientist for four decades, and was more than a little insulted that his employers thought that this little girl was capable of solving a riddle that had vexed him for the last several months.

Sure, the demon scientist hadn’t yet been able to crack it, and had ended the lives of dozens in his attempts, but he was certain that he was making progress.

“No, you’re mine,” Jenny said matter of factly, looking past Dr. Gregson and at three mystic artifacts resting on the work table. Seeing their complexity, Jenny felt a sensation very similar to falling, only without the terror. Her fears for the safety of Angel, concern about how Faith and the rest of her family were taking her disappearance, seemed so far away in the face of this captivating puzzle.

Jenny’s first assessment was that they were like ancient, supernatural rubix cubes. There was a sphere, pyramid and square, all segmented and made of silver and gold, with ancient runes etched into them.

“They’re a fail safe,” Jenny said quickly, “it’s an isolated pocket dimension, created by the Senior Partners in case their people were ever overwhelmed by an enemy.”

“How did…?” Dr. Gregson composed himself quickly, deciding to hide his astonishment than concede Jenny’s intelligence, “I mean, of course.”

“These artifacts, they’re just keys,” Jenny walked around the worktable, examining every square inch of the relics, “they work in conjunction with one another. But you assumed that you needed three people to unlock them. That’s where you went wrong.”

“Well, of course you need three people to unlock the keys!” Dr. Gregson huffed, “the Senior Partners have written in trinity for ages!”

“But this is a fail-safe meant to ensure swift retaliation against powerful enemies,” Jenny explained, “in an instance like that, there would be no way to ensure that three people survived. Ergo, it needed to be able to be operated by one person.”

“I…see,” Dr. Gregson said. The thought made sense, and he wondered why it hadn’t occurred to him before.

“I need to see all your notes,” Jenny flipped open a spare laptop, “mistakes are an important part of research. And I need to see any long hand notes you took.”

“Of course,” Dr. Gregson grumbled.

oooOOooo

“Who does that little brat thing she is?” Dr. Gregson groused as he dug out his notes. Having been a part of this project for months, his paperwork had grown into a significant mountain all by itself, “I’m the one who’s been working on this project for months. And not only have I survived, I’ve caused fifty percent less deaths than the first guy!”

“Not a terribly compelling argument for your continued service,” observed a new voice.

“Who?!”

“A family friend, here on a business trip.”

Dr. Gregson turned around, but before the image of the man standing behind him traveled from his eyes to his brain, the flesh across his throat was neatly sliced. His body went limp, but his killer caught it before it struck the ground, and gently, silently, laid him on the floor.

“I’m just no friend of yours.”

oooOOooo

Jenny wrote down each and every mystic symbol that were etched on the artifacts on a piece of paper, and began researching them individually. It was an ecliptic mix of Latin, Greek and three demon languages that were mysteriously made extinct two hundred years ago but otherwise not too much of a challenge for the young girl.

Once all the symbols were uploaded into a program Jenny had created, she took apart a scanner that once belonged in the labs of Wolfram and Hart. She filed down the runes on the glass, replaced the copper cords with new ones and replaced anything and everything she could with a generic part.

Jenny was certain that one of the reasons why Eve and her people hadn’t made much progress in cracking the keys was because they were using tools made by the company, tools that would logically have safeguards against any abuse.

Magic was tricky, yet intuitive, like that.

Jenny’s theory was born out when she took her ‘new’ scanner, examined the artifacts, and was able to come away with a 3D resonate image of all three keys.

Jenny worked for three hours straight, never noticing Dr. Gregson’s absence, the half shaven Englishmen who leaned against the far wall behind her or the odd tapping that she dismissed as an old pipe in need of repair. She was too far absorbed in her work to take notice of anything other than the artifacts and the discovery, the science that lay before her.

“I am such a genius!” Jenny shouted, as the first sequence dawned on her.

“It runs in the family.”

Jenny let out a little ‘eep!’ and spun around. She saw a familiar man, but it took her a moment to put a name to the face. After all, she’d only met the man once, in passing. But she’d seen pictures and heard stories since.

It wasn’t as if Jenny knew Wesley-Wyndam Price personally.

“Wesley…?” Jenny felt her emotions tie in a knot, “oh! uhh, I mean, Mr. Price!”

“Just Wesley will be fine, or Wes,” the former Watcher replied, with a gentle smile on his face. He walked forward slowly, bridging the distance between them, “as the joke goes, Mr. Price was my father.”

“Where’s Dr. Gregson?” Jenny glanced around, and less looking for Dr. Gregson and more examining the exits.

She already knew the answer, after all.

“I asked him to grant us some privacy,” Wesley said.

“Privacy for what?” Jenny studied Wesley carefully. From what she’d been told, (and what she picked up herself) Wesley was now a conduit for the Senior Partners, their mouthpiece. Then she noticed some paperwork tucked under one arm, and said defiantly, “I won’t sign those papers, and I won’t stop what I’m doing!”

“I wasn’t sent here to ask you to sign a contract,” Wesley said, “though if you must know, I was actually sent here to stop you. The Senior Partners don’t care for what you’re trying to do here.”

“Good, because I’m doing what’s right!” Jenny snapped, “and you can’t stop me!”

“Oh? Are you so sure about that?” Wesley took the paper that was under his arm, and slapped it down on the work table.

Jenny glanced at the hand writing, and saw that it wasn’t a demonic contract for her soul. In fact, it was dated for three weeks back, with crude scientific observations about the artifacts.

It took Jenny only a second to connect the dots, and she bolted for the door, only for Wesley to appear before her in the blink of an eye. Jenny stopped on a dime, and couldn’t keep from trembling.

“Is my reputation really that fierce?” Wesley asked.

“Faith…Faith said you were bad ass, you killed Dr. Gregson, and…” Jenny said. Then, timidly, she finished, “and you hate me.”

“Well, I’d like to think of myself as suave, not bad ass. And I did kill your assistant, Jenny,” Wesley said, “but that was because he was a very bad man. You, however, are a child and more than that, the daughter of the woman I loved. I have no intention of hurting you, and I most certainly don’t hate you.”

“Prove it,” Jenny stepped back, and wracked her brain for another way out.

“I’ve been watching you work for hours now,” Wesley explained, “if I wanted to hurt you, don’t you think I would have already done so? I could have simply let you believe I was immaterial until the moment I ended you.”

“That’s true,” Jenny said.

Wesley watched as he saw Jenny beginning to calm, and felt a stab of remorse. No child should take comfort from a discussion of murder and death. But she accepted it all as if it were a mundane, everyday matter.

No doubt, before Angel and the others had rescued her, it was exactly that.

“Why I was sent here, and why I am actually here, are two entirely different things,” Wesley stepped aside from the door, “you may leave if you wish. I’m here to apologize, talk and if fortune allows, assist. Nothing more.”

“Okay,” Jenny eyed the man carefully, but she felt safe for the moment. This man held the trust of Angel and Faith, and though Jenny was able to infer from their stories that he was capable of being ruthless, nothing they ever said implied that he was cruel. If he meant to kill her, he would have.

Wesley pulled up two chairs, and motioned for her to sit. Soon, Watcher and child sat across from one another, each studying the other.

“I’m certain you have some questions,” Wesley said, “so I’ll make you a deal. I’ll answer yours if you answer mine.”

“Fine. Why are you here?”

“The Senior Partners are afraid you might be able to crack their failsafe,” Wesley said, “they sent me to stop you. And unfortunately, they’ve limited the scope of my actions. I cannot free your father, or free you. My actions are limited to dealing with the failsafe as I see fit.”

“And why did they think you would agree?”

“Because, Jenny, what you are doing is very dangerous, to everyone,” Wesley replied, “don’t think that simply because they want to stop you that what you’re doing here is the right thing. The world is far, far more complicated than that. The Senior Partners are as much about control, order, as they are evil. I’m not ashamed to say that I agree with them in this instance. I’m not a puppet in this, young lady.”

“Why?”

“Well, who wants to be a puppet? Ask your father, it’s no fun being short and made of felt.”

“Huh? What?”

“Sorry, I’m British. There’s a reason why we only do dry wit.”

Jenny shook her head, “No, why do you work for them? Gunn, Lorne, my mom, none of them signed contracts. They all knew better. Anyone would! But you, a Watcher, you’ve studied magic and demons since you were a boy…”

“Ah, good question,” Wesley replied, “you can be very insightful, when you want to be. But I’m afraid that you’re being too narrow-minded when considering how contracts work. Most are done with payment for services rendered. The contract I signed with Wolfram and Hart is more…a long term lease with a compensation package included for services rendered with an at will employment clause. They have my soul for as long as I allow it, and in time, they must fulfill a request of mine.”

“Why would…” Jenny tilted her head to the side, “…you drafted and signed it. You must have loved her very much too.”

Wesley nodded sadly, “Very insightful and very smart, just like your mother. Yes, I did. After losing your mother, I couldn’t stand the thought of not doing everything I could for a woman I loved. But I neglected to properly research certain terms, and here we are. The devil is indeed in the details. But the point is, in the end, I’m here of my own free will even if I’m acting on someone else’s behalf. Now, young lady, you need to answer my questions.”

Jenny gulped, and a shiver shot down her spine.

“I apologize, but due to our limited time, I simply haven’t the ability to approach this question with the sensitivity it or you deserve,” Wesley said, “Jenny, how did you learn that you were born because your mother was raped?”

Jenny paled, painful memories of Pylea whirling around in her head.

“I…one day, Kah’rune, a new slave, had twisted her ankle. She asked the Overseer if she could have lighter duty that day, but…,” Jenny swallowed, her voice became a whisper, “but she asked in front of everyone, and you never do that, ever. They think it makes them look weak. So after we took in the crop and cleaned the stables, he ordered everyone to gather, and…”

Jenny sobbed softly, the memories didn’t burn as much now as they did then, but they still hurt. Wesley wanted to offer a hand of comfort, a hug, anything, but knew that it would have been of no comfort to Jenny. He was still just a stranger to her, no matter how much he wished otherwise. All he could do was wait patiently for her to compose herself and continue.

“We all had to watch. Mom covered my eyes, but I could still hear…later, H’oldker told me that was how I was born, that I was just a thing of pain,” Jenny finished. Then, despite herself, she smiled as she continued, “mom hit him with a rock for that, cost him an eye. She said my father was a traveling knight on a white horse, but the next day she said something different, and then said she didn’t remember.”

Jenny wiped the tears from her eyes.

“I’m truly sorry, Jenny, no child should have to hear that,” Wesley said.

“Why? It’s the truth,” Jenny said.

“When applying facts to people, facts are rarely facts young lady,” Wesley explained, “tell me, have you ever confided what you told me in Angel or Lorne? Gunn, perhaps?”

“No,” Jenny shook her head, “or Faith. They’ve asked and they’ve tried, but I just can’t!”

“Why not?”

“Because I take too much from them already,” Jenny said, crest-fallen, “they feed me, they protect me, they clothe me, they don’t even beat me when I forget my chores. I…I actually know that for a fact.”

“As do I. Jenny…”

“I did an experiment after I forgot once, and…they didn’t even notice,” Jenny said. As she spoke, her face lit up, like a child describing a Christmas present, “I did it three times, and all Angel did was remind me to do it later! He didn’t even slap me! He still hasn’t!”

“He never will. Jenny…”

“And I can see from the way your lip curls and the way you’re wincing that you think that’s not a lot, but you’re wrong!”

“Jenny…”

“I was going to die, worked to death in the field after being bred like an animal just like mom,” Jenny growled, “my dead meat was going to be put in the fields and my skull crushed underfoot during the next summer harvest. Angel, Faith, Spike, they all took me away from all that and brought me here! They don’t just feed me, they give me candy, they let me learn, watch TV and have never tried to hurt me!”

“Jenny…,” try as he might, Wesley struggled to get a word in edgewise. It reminded him so very much of when Fred would go on about her theories, and though he had no physical body, it still made him ache.

But Wesley knew the price of letting Jenny see that. So he kept his best poker face, as she continued.

“And I know I cost them currency, a lot! I don’t contribute like Gunn or Faith, all I do is research and translate and that doesn’t bring in even ten percent of the money they spend on me!” Jenny said, anger quickly turning into guilt.

Wesley chuckled, “I find it ironic that you of all people underestimate the power of knowledge.”

“Anyone could translate trinity written M’orpatic,” Jenny said softly.

“If you say so,” Wesley said, “but that’s beside the point. Why are you so certain you can’t confide in Angel and Faith?”

“I did it once before,” Jenny said quietly, “they were very upset afterwards.”

“You know they weren’t upset with you, yes?”

“They tried to hide it,” Jenny said, as if she hadn’t heard Wesley, “but… I can’t do that to them again, not after all they’ve done for me. It’s not fair to them.”

“Is that why you confided in Eve instead?”

“Yes,” Jenny tried to say without emotion.

“Because she gave you nothing.”

“…I know it was selfish of me,” Jenny said, “but she understood, and I just needed to tell someone, and I felt so much better…”

“But now she’s asking for something in return,” Wesley observed, “that’s the real reason why you’re helping her, isn’t it? It’s not just that you want to free some self proclaimed slaves, it’s that you’re repaying a debt.”

“No it’s not,” Jenny said unconvincingly.

Wesley leaned back in his chair and sighed, “Remember how I said facts are not facts with regards to people? Well, they’re not. To begin with, you take nothing from Angel and the others. However, you have been given a great many things. There’s an important distinction there. Furthermore, all of it, every single thing, is nothing compared to what they’re willing to give you.”

“I know,” Jenny said. She couldn’t bring herself to look Wesley in the eye, “that’s why I can’t ask.”

“I’m certain you hear this a great deal, but you remind me of your mother, in some ways,” Wesley said, “your mother had a big heart, just like yours.”

“Umm, mine has six valves,” Jenny said.

“Figure of speech,” Wesley said, “you love your family very much, that much is clear. But it’s clear to me that you don’t care about the most important person in your life.”

“Shut up, I love Angel!” Jenny snapped.

“I wasn’t talking about Angel,” Wesley said.

“I love Faith too!” Jenny replied, “she’s strong and brave and she loves me back!”

“Hmm, Faith,” Wesley processed the information silently, “well, I wasn’t referring to her, either. Or Spike or Gunn.”

Jenny looked at Wesley, baffled.

“The most important person in your life that you don’t care anything for?”

Wesley gently tapped Jenny on the head.

“I’m looking right at her.”

“…what?”

“If Angel asked for your help, would you give it?”

“Of course!”

“What about Faith?”

“Yes!”

“Really? So if they had some secret they had to confide in someone, would you just ignore them?”

“Never!” Jenny snapped, then, quickly, said, “but that’s different.”

“Why?”

“Because…” Jenny rubbed her eyes, “they give me food, a home and love me, why isn’t that enough?”

“Because you need more,” replied Wesley, “because every child is entitled to more. Jenny, pain shared is pain divided. The burden you carry is one your family would take from you, one they would gladly share, if you just let them.”

“I…I…”

“You understand that Faith, Angel and everyone else, they are your family, and not simply nice masters?”

“I…do,” Jenny said unconvincingly.

“Do you?”

“Shut up!” Jenny snapped, “you’re just trying to hurt me!”

“No, I swear I’m trying to help…”

“The Senior Partners would never have sent you here unless you could convince them you meant to kill me!” Jenny said. She pointed an accusing finger at the Englishman, “and I heard you with Angel, Lorne and Spike! I disgust you! You called me a thing!”

Wesley closed his eyes and sighed with remorse, “I did say that, didn’t I? I did what countless others have no doubt done, looked at you and only saw the crime committed against your mother and not the kind and caring little girl that was actually there. Well, as one of those people, I can say with confidence that each and every one of them is a pathetic, simpering idiot. I…knew your mother…”

“They said you loved her,” Jenny said softly.

“I didn’t just love your mother,” Wesley corrected, “I worshipped her. I looked at her and saw only perfection, a woman without flaw, an ideal. If I only loved her, I would have been ecstatic that we’d found you, that there was some small part of her left alive, that we could do for you what your mother no longer could. Now, Gunn, Angel and Spike, they loved your mother. And how have they treated you?”

Jenny replied with silence.

“And you’re right, the Senior Partners had to be convinced that I was in the proper state of mind for them to send me. They could not read my mind, however, but could feel my emotions,” Wesley explained, “so I channeled my rage at how you and your mother suffered, my anger that those who would exploit you. And they were convinced.”

“Or they let you think they were,” said Jenny.

“Or that, perhaps,” Wesley replied, “truth be told, I have no intention of taking action without your permission either way. I simply wished to meet you, Jenny, and now that I have, I have to say you remind me of two people, actually. Your mother, obviously, as I said…”

“Faith?” Jenny said hopefully.

“No,” Wesley said, “I was going to say you actually remind me of myself.”

Jenny looked at Wesley with a raised eyebrow.

“You find yourself in a difficult situation, and you think that because you’re making a hard choice that you’re making the right one,” Wesley explained, “and you think that because you understand monsters, it reflects on some small part of you, a dark part you always have to control.”

“…”

“And lastly, you think that because you know something others don’t, you’re the smartest person in the room,” Wesley finished, “the irony of course, is that being the most knowledgeable person in the room can also make you the most ignorant.”

“The truth is, simply making a hard choice does not automatically make it right. You shouldn’t ignore that fear and doubt that you’re feeling right now, you should listen to it. You are not, you are never, so far gone than you cannot turn back and still do the right thing, Jenny.”

Jenny refused to raise her head.

“You understand monsters because all your life, you’ve been forced to live with them. You, Jenny, are a survivor. Your understanding of them is a survival mechanism, nothing more and nothing less. Even the lowest prey can understand their hunter.”

“I have monster in my blood,” Jenny said softly.

“I know Lorne personally, and Groo as well,” Wesley said, “so I can say with good authority your blood is only that.”

“They’re outliers,” Jenny said weakly.

“I know of no sort of monster that hides their pain from her family so as to keep from hurting them,” Wesley replied, “I’ve studied magic and demons since I was a boy, I should know.”

Jenny squeezed her eyes shut.

“Monsters revel in their actions,” Wesley explained, “tell me, how exactly have you tormented those close to you, hmm?”

“I steal Kate’s candy,” Jenny confessed, “she always leaves in in a lock box in the spare room that she sometimes uses and never changes the combination, and it’s really, really good, but…”

“Candy thief,” Wesley said, “you must be a sub-species of the C Monster of S street. Funny how a detective can’t secure her own possessions, leaving it in the same place with the same failed protection, don’t you think?”

“That’s not…she didn’t…” Jenny scrambled, “I’m doing…what’s right.”

“Doing the right thing?” said Wesley, “once again, I find myself unable to think of a single evil monster who wants to do that.”

“Stop trying to confuse me!” Jenny snapped, “Eve is my friend, the Senior Partners are evil and…and…you hate me!”

“Jenny, I already explained…”

“You lied!” Jenny snapped, “you loved my mom and you hate me! Just admit it!”

“Why would I hate you?” said Wesley, “I freely admit, I was taken back when I learned of your existence, and my behavior was inexcusable, but if I truly hated you, we both know I could do far worse than trying to convince to stop this with words.”

“That’s…” Jenny looked aside, and did all she could to power through his retort. Every one of Wesley’s comments cut her to the quick. Just hearing those doubts, those fears said aloud by someone else was perhaps the hardest thing Jenny had experienced yet on earth, and as it all bubbled to the surface, it drowned out the Watcher’s heartfelt assurances and logic.

“You’re just trying to trick me, you hate me, I know it!”

“Because I loved your mother?”

“Yes!”

“Like Gunn hates you?”

Jenny took a step back.

“That’s…not…he…”

“Tell me, how does Gunn mistreat you?” Wesley asked, “he loved your mother, just the same as me. So if you’re right, that I hate you because I loved her, then the same must be true of Gunn. Tell me, is Gunn’s treatment of you any different from how the others treat you?”

“He…doesn’t like it when I watch the news,” Jenny said, “he tries to turn it to cartoons because he thinks the news is too violent, and I tell him I’ve seen worse personally, and he always says that just because I’ve seen worse doesn’t mean I have to see more, and…”

“And he’s trying to protect you from the world,” Wesley said, “are those the actions of a man who hates you?”

“That’s not…he’s…” Jenny shook her head, “shut up! Stop trying to confuse me!”

“I’m doing no such thing,” Wesley replied, “why are you so convinced I hate you?”

“Because it makes sense!” Jenny screamed. She swallowed hard, and sank to her knees. Then, softly said, “it…just makes sense…”

Wesley gave Jenny a look of pity and knelt down until he was eye level with the sobbing girl, “How does it make sense?”

“I was only born because someone hurt her,” Jenny said, her throat raw, “no matter what you say about how it’s not my fault, it’s still what happened. Spike, Angel and everyone else tells me all these amazing things about her, and I _don’t even recognize her_ , and…and she’s dead and they still care! About her and about me!

“It! Doesn’t! Sense!”

“Jenny, let me tell you a secret about life,” Wesley replied without hesitation, “In the end, no matter how hard we fight, no matter why we fight, and no matter how much we want it to, life does not always make sense, and sadly, it is not always fair.

“Children that deserve a mother are stolen away, and the hero does not always save the fair maiden. But there are times when life is amazing, even in the harshest circumstances, and you, Jenny, are proof of that.”

“No I’m not…” Jenny said, “I…”

“Don’t think of how you were born as defining you,” Wesley pleaded, “I wasn’t not born because violence by one parent, and I can say with confidence that Angel loves you more than my father ever loved me.”

“But…”

“Do you know how Angel came about his soul?” Wesley asked.

Jenny shook her head.

“It’s not my story to tell, but it’s something I believe you need to hear,” Wesley said, “you see, before he became Angel, he was known as Angelus. One of the most brutal vampires in recorded history. He was a cunning sadist, whose personal cruelty is still unmatched today.”

Wesley gave Jenny a look.

“And I get the feeling that you don’t believe me.”

“Angel’s not like that,” Jenny said softly.

“You’re right, Angel isn’t,” said Wesley, “but Angelus, is or was. He was a monster without peer, in his own way. And that was his ultimate undoing. He chose a young Roma girl as a victim, and ended her. What was done to Fred, your mother, and Kah’rune, Angelus did so, much worse. His actions were so terrible in fact, that her clan cursed him with a soul. They didn’t do it to create a champion for the helpless, to avenge Angelus’ other countless victims or any noble reason. They did it to make Angelus suffer as much as his victim.”

“That’s not….who Angel is!” Jenny said, livid, “you’re lying to me, again!”

“It’s not who Angel is, but who Angelus was,” Wesley replied, “Angel’s soul is what allows him to do good, to be the man that he is. And he only came by it, because he butchered a young woman. The world is only here today, because he tortured and murdered a completely innocent girl, and her family took the most sadistic revenge they could think of.”

“That’s…” the thought swirled in Jenny’s head, “not…”

“Am I lying?” asked Wesley, “I’m certain the others have warned you what were to happen if Angel lost his soul, the threat posed.”

Jenny nodded. The day when she, Faith and Angel had that talk still stuck in her memory. It was understood that if that happened, Jenny would be taken by the closest member of her family, be it Lorne, Gunn or whoever, they would take a car, run and not look back. If and when things got better, Willow would be used to track them down.

It was a simple plan, but the way Faith and Angel conveyed it, the enormity of the danger, worried Jenny nearly as much as it baffled her. She couldn’t ever see Angel as an actual threat to her.

“Tell me Jenny, of Gunn, Spike and Faith, do you think any of them would have allowed Angelus to kill that girl?” asked Wesley, “would any of them simply stood aside, even if they knew what would happen afterwards?”

“No…”

“And do any of them hate Angel for that?”

Jenny shook his head, and wiped away the tears, “No, but…they didn’t know her.”

“Knowing your mother like I did, like we do, that only means we should care about you more,” Wesley replied, “and evidence would suggest that I’m not alone in that regard.”

“But…”

“You look at your family, and sometimes deep down all you see is people who would have prevented your conception,” Wesley said, “well, they would have, whether they knew Fred or not, because that’s who they are. But they didn’t, but that does not mean they, or I, love you any less because of it. It may not make sense, but life, and family, don’t always make sense. When this is all over, ask your father about Connor and I. And don’t take no for an answer.”

“What, why…?”

“How’s everything going in here?” Harmony opened the door, and saw Jenny sitting on the floor, knees huddled to her chest, and Dr. Gregson on one knee before her. The blond vampire found Jenny’s tears impossible to miss, “hey, what are you doing to her?”

“Simply teaching her an important lesson,” Wesley said, with another’s voice, “is there something you need? Because otherwise, I’d appreciate it if you left us to our work.”

Harmony’s face shifted, “If you think you can hurt that kid, buster, you better think twice, and then think again!”

“If I wanted her hurt, I’d have done it already,” Wesley replied, “now leave us. Unless you think a lowly vampire is worth more to the Black Circle than a learned man of my caliber.”

“I’ll leave, for now,” Harmony turned, “but put one scratch on her hair, and I’ll show you what one, lowly but impossibly hot vampire can do!”

Wesley allowed the illusion to fade the moment Harmony left the room, and turned to Jenny with a clever smile, “Even Harmony is fond of you, and she barely knows you.”

“She’s an idiot,” Jenny deadpanned.

“True enough,” Wesley offered Jenny a hand, and brought the little girl to her feet, “I think I’ve figured out what you’re really doing here, by the way.”

“Breaking the failsafe?”

Wesley shook his head and chuckled, “No, not that, though it’s a part of that. When I said you reminded me of myself, I had no idea how much. I did the exact same thing you’re doing right now.”

“There were two fail-safes?”

“Just…forget them for a moment,” Wesley said, “I was always attracted to your mother, Jenny. From the first day I met her. But I was too afraid to approach her, too scared that she might not feel the same way I felt about her. I hesitated. Then, during the course of an investigation, I was infected by a sample of mystical blood. I said, and tried to do, truly terrible things to your mother because of it.

“When it was all over, your mother was deeply concerned about me, despite everything I said and did, and I pushed her away,” Wesley said, “I told myself it was because of how ashamed I was of my actions, how they were some secret, hidden part of me, but wasn’t the truth. No, the truth was that I was so afraid of failure, terrified of the thought that your mother might not love me as much as I loved her, that I found it easier to fail, to fail with an excellent excuse, than to actually try. And I think that’s exactly what you’re doing here.”

“No I’m not!” Jenny snapped, “I’m helping my friend, I’m doing the right thing!”

“I think you find yourself in a situation better than you could ever hope to expect, where you’re loved, treated as an equal and never abused, and on some level, that scares you,” said Wesley, “you’re afraid that it’s all going to disappear somehow, like a dream. So you’d rather make it disappear now, destroy it all, because that at least you can control. No more waiting for the other shoe to drop, no more worrying when it will all be revealed as a lie.”

“I’m not…they…” Jenny scrambled, “they…don’t treat me as an equal.”

“Oh?”

Jenny ran her hand through her hair uncomfortably, “They…try to keep me from contributing. Everyone else is expected to fight, but I’m not. They always ensure someone is protecting me, and…and don’t care that I don’t use an Uncle prefix when addressing them because when I call them by their names it feels like I’m talking to them as an equal, and I really, really like that…”

“To them, you’re more than equal, you’re precious to them,” Wesley explained, “you’re a child…”

“So what?”

Wesley gritted his teeth despite himself. He’d met people in his life, who, as the saying went, ‘knew the price of everything but value of nothing’, but this was the first time he’d met someone who counted themselves among the ‘nothing’. And it was absolutely maddening.

“And just because Eve is…was an enemy doesn’t mean she’s evil!” Jenny insisted, “Gunn fought Angel, so did Spike and Faith! Kate thought he was a killer!”

“Do you know the details of those conflicts?” Wesley asked.

“…no,” Jenny confessed, “not really. Gunn just said it was like in the comic books. People who disagree fight because they don’t understand one another and then when they do understand one another they don’t fight. Well, not with fists.”

Wesley shook his head, and bitterly wondered how someone so brilliant could also be so foolish. To know so much and at the same time, so little. Was it because they had to be careful about how she socialized? After LA was thrown into hell, no doubt it wasn’t exactly safe for her to be in public like any other child. Was it because she was so accustomed to brutal treatment that she was eager to return the slightest kindness?

And he couldn’t help but wonder, was Pylea like this for Fred? To be so very smart in a world she just fundamentally couldn’t understand? Wesley was beginning to think that while Angel had taken Jenny from slavery, he hadn’t quite taken the slave out of Jenny.

But when he looked at Jenny again, he found his answer, and wanted to smack himself.

“Brilliant,” Wesley sighed, rubbing his forehead, “no wonder you were head boy, Mr. Pryce.”

“Excuse me?” Jenny said.

Wesley looked at Jenny, and finally saw the truth. The little girl was brilliant, truly Fred’s daughter, but she was still just a _child_. A child raised in brutality, then brought in a world she didn’t understand by people she never met, where basic human decency was so overwhelming a concept that it was more difficult for her to comprehend than magic itself, and then told that she mattered as a person because of who her dead mother was.

Wesley couldn’t help but think back to his own childhood, how he rationalized everything his father did to him as something he deserved, as just a part of everyday life. The thought that Jenny might have rationalized her own slavery and mistreatment the same way, made Wesley sick to his stomach.

And whereas her mother spent months inside a room hiding from the world, gradually growing accustomed to the fact that she was no longer living in a hell dimension, Jenny clearly wasn’t allowed that method of coping. And Wesley suspected the pressure, the impossibility of it all, was weighing on her in ways well behind his limited ability to see, let alone help.

That was the biggest difference between mother and daughter, Wesley realized. Fred had a life before slavery and a family that loved her.

Jenny, however, was born into slavery, and all she had who loved her was the mother she was torn away from. No matter how smart she was intellectually, emotionally she simply had no context to put her relationship with Angel and the rest in.

And, Wesley suspected, Jenny would cling to any possibility, any hope that would allow her to keep both Angel and Eve. Her motivations were a tangled weave, Wesley thought, but then, who’s weren’t?

“Nothing,” Wesley said, “nothing important. Tell me, Jenny, after everything I’ve said, are you still determined to open that failsafe, to assist Eve?”

Jenny nodded, and Wesley felt a combination of pity and pride when he saw how Jenny stood up a little straighter. She had her mother’s courage, if not her sense.

“Very well then,” Wesley said. He turned his attention to the artifacts and rubbed his hands together, “lets get started, shall we?”

“Hubuwhat?”

“We’re going to work together, and when the time comes, I will open the failsafe,” Wesley said.

“No!” Jenny shot in front of the artifacts, “you can’t trick me that easily!”

“It’s no trick,” Wesley replied, “remember Jenny, if I meant you harm, if I truly wanted to stop this some other way than by changing your mind, I could.”

“Then…you think I’m right?” Jenny said hopefully.

“Not at all,” Wesley said.

“Then why…?”

“I’m helping you make a terrible mistake,” Wesley said, “it doesn’t make sense, does it?”

Jenny scowled.

“Though I do have some conditions,” Wesley took one of Dr. Gregson’s notes, and scribbled down an address. He tore the paper free, and handed it to Jenny, “first, I’d like you to take this. It’s the location of some of my journals, research materials and a few other things I might have needed in the event of an emergency. I squirreled them away before we took over Wolfram and Hart, just in case. I think you should have them.”

Jenny took the paper gingerly, “Why are you giving this to me?”

“Because they’re of no use to me now, and most importantly, you’re family,” Wesley said.

“I’m…I’m not…”

“You are as far as I am concerned.”

“What are the other conditions?” Jenny said quickly. She needed a distraction from the honesty of Wesley’s reply.

“Second, when we’re done, I will be the one who opens the failsafe,” Wesley said, “I will take the responsibility for opening it, not you. This is not up for debate. If you do not allow me this, I will physically stop you. That, young lady, is a promise.”

“…why?”

“You’ll understand in time, and because Burkles have a poor family history when it comes to solving mystical puzzles,” Wesley said, “all I ask is that you take…precautions against treachery. If Eve means you no harm, then what could it hurt? I’m sure it would mean a lot to your father as well.”

“I…could do that,” Jenny said softly.

“Lastly, and most important,” Wesley said, “when this is all over, you have to promise me that you’ll accept Angel’s forgiveness.”

“I’m not doing anything…” Jenny looked at Wesley, and saw the guilt on his face, “…okay. I won’t need it, but okay.”

Wesley sighed, less than convinced, “Very well then, lets get to work.”

“You’re serious.”

“Of course. I’m British, we’re always serious.”

“Spike…”

“Is an exception to the rule, and a disgrace to my countrymen in general. Are you ready to get started?”

Jenny’s eyes went wide, “Stop, you can’t! You’re under contract to the Senior Partners with implicit and explicit conditions based on codified rules in addition to obedience to the laws of conservation of energy and…”

“I’ll lose whatever favor I may have garnered,” Wesley summarized, “I may even end up indebted to the Senior Partners. I know, and my offer stands.”

“But…but…”

“If you’re right, then it won’t matter,” Wesley said, “and if you’re wrong, it’s still my choice to make.”

“But…but…”

“We’re doing the right thing, aren’t we?”

“We are,” Jenny sounded less convinced than before, but Wesley noted, she hadn’t called it off, “let’s…lets get started.”

“Very well,” Wesley took the top half of Dr. Gregson’s research, and handed it to Jenny, “before we start, lets review, shall we?”

Jenny took the papers, but for a moment, found herself unable to focus.

Wesley was wrong, he had to be. This wasn’t her trying to sabotage her own life…

…was it?

One year ago, she was working the fields, being beaten by the Overseers for being too smart, and ostracized by her fellow slaves for being too green, or not green enough. Her joints ached, she barely slept because every time she turned on her back, she was overwhelmed by a world of pain and the idea of a full stomach was regarded as nothing more than a pipe dream. She was alone in every sense of the word.

Now…

Now she slept comfortably in her own bed and her own room, in a home bigger than anything her slave masters could have dreamed to own. Her back wasn’t a map of scars and actually felt normal, she ate three meals a day plus snacks, and had a family that fought for her without question, without hesitation. Compared to her old life, they lavished gifts upon her daily. And they did so in memory of her mother, who was dead and gone.

If anyone told her on Pylea that this would be her life, ever, because of her now dead mother, an insane slave she never thought she’d see again, Jenny never would have believed them. Because even now, in the hands of her family’s enemies, her life felt too good to be true.

But this wasn’t her sabotaging all that, it wasn’t.

This was her living up to her mother’s legacy, living up to the lessons Angel and Faith had taught her. This was her finally giving back to the men and women who adopted her into their family, after taking so much.

“We’re doing the right thing,” Jenny said softly, never looking up from the papers. She tensed, expecting Wesley to start in on her, but the Englishmen hadn’t heard her, or at least pretended not to, “we are.”

“We have to be.”

 


	29. Chapter 29

Black Circle 3

 

Angel flexed his hands, and tried to calculate how long he’d been held captive.

Eve had been kind enough to provide blood twice now (intravenously, they weren’t about to loosen his restraints), but that was hardly a reliable measure of time. Angel found he was almost grateful for the three months he spent in the ocean. Whenever he thought the isolation was getting to him, he calmly reminded himself how much worse it could be. At least the scenery changed here.

Idiot. Maniac. Thug. Mook, and back again. It beat just water and fishes by miles.

“Comfy?” Eve strolled inside with a Cheshire like grin on her face, “would you like a television, newspaper to pass the time?”

Angel pushed down the anger in his belly, and said, “So tell me, Eve, where does this go when Jenny can’t break the fail safe?”

“Don’t you have any faith in your adopted daughter?” Eve smirked.

“Oh, I know she’s brilliant, every bit Fred’s daughter in that regard,” Angel said, “but she’s still just a kid, with not even five years of formal education. In addition, you’re dealing with ancient magic that adult experts couldn’t break. You’ve put all your chips down on a miracle. I’ve seen miracles, and even I don’t bet on them.”

Eve furrowed her brow, “Did you read anything I put on your desk? Because like the third memo I gave you would have totally explained everything.”

“To be honest, I ignored most of it.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re evil,” Angel said, “duh.”

“Our brave champion, everyone,” Eve rubbed the bridge of her nose, “you might as well give up the hope that Jenny will fail. I know she won’t.”

“And how could you possibly know that?”

“Have you ever wondered how your witch friend, Willow, became so powerful?”

Angel shrugged, “Good genes?”

“More like luck, brains and late development,” Eve said, “you see, science and magic are not opposites. In fact, they’re inter-related. It’s like language development.  With young people, still developing minds, it’s circular, applying the principles of science to magic lead to greater comprehension of magic, which in turns leads to greater understanding of science. It’s a snowball effect, really.”

“Do I want to know how many children you killed to learn that?”

Eve shrugged casually, “Less than you’d think. See, Willow, she was something of a late developer, by human standard. Her late personal development, coupled with her impressive intellect, allowed her to become one of the great powers of this reality. Now Jenny, she’s even younger and a hell of a lot smarter.”

“Jenny’s just a kid,” Angel said, “Willow was a teenager, with years of exposure and proper education…”

“And Jenny was created by magic, and is just as smart as her mother,” Eve replied, “believe me, before she’s even a teenager, she’ll put Reed Richards to shame.”

“…the shoe bomber?”

Eve gave Angel a look of bafflement, “That’s Richard Reed. How do you know about some failed terrorist, and not a forty year old pop culture character?”

“I’ve always kept an eye on all forms of international travel, habit for a vampire of my age,” replied Angel, “so is that why Wolfram and Hart never try to use Jenny as leverage? Because she’d be too smart for them to handle?”

“What makes you think they even knew about her?”

“Because of the resources at their disposal,” Angel said, “hell, I bet they even have a file on her biological father.”

“Makes you wish you didn’t ignore most of our files, doesn’t it?” Eve smiled, and despite himself, Angel winced.

“If you must know, Fred’s psyche profile said she’d never betray you, so it was decided to it was best to keep Jenny in the deck for later. When Fred died, Jenny was just forgotten.”

“So yes, actually,” Angel said, “you have an excellent poker face, Eve, but you need to work on your lies. You always sound like you’re reading a script.”

“What makes you think…?”

“Fred would have betrayed me in a heartbeat for Jenny. I know this because I know exactly how far a parent will go for their child,” Angel said, “so this means you’re playing with fire, an asset the Senior Partners weren’t certain they could control or direct, one they felt was too dangerous for me and my team to have on our side. And if they couldn’t, what makes you think you could?”

Eve scowled, “You over estimate the Senior Partners. They think so far ahead that they miss what’s going on right under their nose! Did you ever stop and think about Illyria? I mean, really think about what really happened?”

“What about her?”

“She’s an immortal ally for you and your idiot crusade of self righteousness,” Eve said, “one who can walk in the sun, one you can teach the value of right and wrong, the American way, apple pie, blah, blah, blah….”

“I’m Irish, just for the record.”

“Whatever! The Senior Partners were so inattentive that they allowed one of their first competitors, an Old One, into the heart of their power in this realm. One of their own pawns just walked her through the front door! They wanted to believe you killed Fred, they had to, because it was the only way they wouldn’t look like complete fools to every power on every plane!”

“Then Knox, he wasn’t manipulated into freeing her…?”

Eve threw her head back and laughed, “What, you thought they had some secret plan to resurrect one of their greatest enemies? Not even close. He and that idiot doctor were lone gunmen with their own agenda,” Eve said, “funny, isn’t it? No matter what lies you told the Circle, or how you tried to spin it to your friends, Fred’s death was just a tragic but easily foreseeable murder. She died a horrible, painful death because you thought you could redeem anything, even a corporation built by evil for evil. You led your friends into the belly of the beast for the sake of your ego, to prove that you could redeem anything. Because if you could do that, you could save yourself. Connor was just a convenient excuse for you.

“How can you even look at Jenny, knowing that her mother is dead because of your hubris? Or does raising her daughter somehow make it all okay? Lets be honest here, Angel, Jenny’s nothing to you but a tool for self flagellation.”

“Spare me the lectures,” Angel replied, “I’ve heard better from much smarter than you. You know nothing about me. That’s why your coup failed, and why you’ll fail here. You’re out of your league and the sad part is that you don’t even know it.”

“Angel, I knew everything about you and yours before you ever stepped foot inside Wolfram and Hart.”

“And I still beat you, Lindsey and the Senior Partners. For all the information at your fingertips, you still know nothing at all.”

Eve was silent for a moment, then…

 “Wait, what do you mean Jenny was created by magic?”

“Oh Angel, are you really that naïve?” Eve cocked her head at him in mock sympathy, “I mean, the magic that helped bring Jenny into the world isn’t anywhere near as impressive as what created Connor, over the counter stuff really, but you just don’t wait for brood sows to be in heat before you bring them a stud. You coax them along.”

Angel lunged at Eve before his body remembered the restraints.

“Oh, did I touch a nerve?” Eve said, “sorry, I’m not sure what the exact term for farm breeding is called. I’m a city girl.”

“Five minutes.”

 “Five minutes?”

“I’m going to pull your teeth out, one by one,” Angel said, “then, I’ll shove a rag down your throat, and make you gargle salt water for five minutes.”

Eve paled.

“Oh, did I touch a nerve? Because, believe me, when I’m done with you, I will literally,” said Angel, “refer to Fred, Jenny or any member of my family as animals ever again, and it becomes ten minutes.”

“…pretty brave for a man in restraints,” Eve said.

“I’m Angel,” smirked the Vampire, “I’ve been through this enough to know how it ends.”

“Did you tell Doyle that? What about Fred?” Eve said, “did you see LA being thrown into hell?”

“That one did blind side me, I’ll admit,” said Angel, “and yet here we are.”

“Eve!” A Brawler demon entered the room, “she’s done!”

Angel swallowed hard, while Eve smirked.

“Yes, here we are.”

“Eve…”

“And you doubted her,” Eve said, “bring the girl, and the Black Circle in here. It’s time to get started.”

Angel felt his gut twist as Eve’s collaborators filed in. Angel recognized a handful, Corbin Fries, and the two-bit magician ‘Spanky’ (Angel didn’t care about his real name), a female demon with blue skin and horns, and…

“Sahjhan?”

“Excuse me? Do I look like my cousin?” said Granock demon, who looked exactly like Sagjhan in every way, “my temporal axis is sixty degrees to the last second! We look nothing alike, you racist.”

 “...okay.”

Angel took a moment to assess the Black Circle, and to say that he wasn’t impressed would have been like saying space was cold.

It went without saying that each member of the Circle was powerful and danger in their own way, but none of them carried themselves with the authority, with the power that the real members of the Black Thorn had. Each and every member of the Black Circle reminded Angel of a house cat, with its chest puffed out trying to look strong around their cohorts, looking out without bothering to look inwards at themselves.

More than that, while Angel only knew a few of them, he could still see this alliance of self declared movers and shakers wasn’t half as powerful as they thought themselves to be. Angel had over a hundred years experience in building teams, in watching how personalities meshed and skilled clicked. Even when he was Angelus, he knew the importance of good teammates.

When he and Spike worked together, the younger vampire’s short temper and quick wit was actually helpful (not that Angel would have ever admitted it to him, then or now). More than once, Spike had pointed out a flaw in his plan, or forced Angelus to justify his actions in a way that reassured the rest of the Whirlwind. With the right people, people like Gunn, Spike or even in a pinch, Darla, Angel had long since learned that sometimes, two plus two could equal ten.

And this mix of criminals and rogues were anything but to one another. The way they postured to each other, the suspicious glances, the weak powers that were suddenly pushed to the forefront, Angel felt like he had a deck seat on the Titanic, with the iceberg in sight. With this group of idiots, two plus two equaled the national debt.    

“Eve, I did it, I did it!” Jenny came rushing in, pushing a gurney and Angel felt a rush of anxiety shoot through him. Jenny looked absolutely terrible, she had bags underneath her eyes, her clothes looked like they’d been worn for days on end, her hair put rats’ nests to shame and Angel barely needed his enhanced senses to tell that she hadn’t bathed in days.

But Jenny had a wide smile, and energy about her that communicated to Angel that Jenny had been anything but tortured.

On the gurney were a dozen different weapons, swords, axes, knives and one old, dirty leather bound book. Some of the weapons looked impossibly new, others ancient. The sheer power of the artifacts made the hair stand up on the back of Angel’s neck stand up.

“I knew you could do it!” Eve swept Jenny into a sincere hug.

“I had help,” Jenny said sheepishly. She looked at her adopted father, “could you free Angel now?”

“In time, sweetie, promise,” Eve said, “now, Black Circle, claim your weapons, so that we might claim our rightful destiny!”

They rushed forward like a mob, scooping up weapons indiscriminately. They simply grabbed what looked to be the biggest, most impressive weapon without regard for its history or actual power, until the only thing that remained on the gurney was an old book. More than a few argued over who got what, like children fighting over toys.

Jenny felt her knees shake a little, watching Eve’s friends test their weapons. She could feel more than a couple trying to channel their will into the mystic weapons, trying to get them to work.

“Eve, I’d…I’d really like to go now,” Jenny said, “you gave your word, Eve.”

Eve, and her Black Circle friends, fell deathly silent. All eyes fell on Eve, and Jenny felt her blood run cold when she saw more than a few of the Black Circle smirk.

“Of course, I did say you could both leave here alive,” Eve ran her finger along the dagger she’d picked up, and pointed it at Angel, “but then, Angel isn’t really alive, is he?”

Jenny’s eyes went from Eve, then to Angel as a surge of energy exploded out of the dagger and washed over the vampire. When Eve was done, all that remained was a column of smoking obscuring where Angel had once been.

“Nooooo….!” Jenny screamed. She fell to her knees, tears streaming from her eyes, “how…how could you?”

“I know it’s hard to understand,” Eve approached Jenny, “but we had to do this. Angel is the Senior Partner’s greatest asset. With him dead, their plans for humanity are destined to fail…”

“You guys have that in common, it seems.”

Jenny’s eyes went wide, “Dad! It worked!”

Eve gasped as she saw Angel standing in the circle, free of his restraints and completely unharmed, “How…?”

Jenny snapped her head around, “Because I made a promise. You betrayed me…!”

“Jenny, Jenny, wait!” Eve stammered.

“You lied! Eta kuram na smek!” Jenny shouted, “and I swear, I’ll make you pay!”

The room began to shake, and Eve watched in horror as the dagger in her hand, and the axes and swords and all the other weapons her compatriots had snatched up, began to crack like glass. As one, all the weapons cracked as lightning exploded out of them and formed into a globe in the center of the room.

“You…,” Jenny shook with anger, as the globe of mystical energy hung over her like a disco ball, “does anyone here want to bet that they’re smarter than me twice?”

The Black Circle nearly trampled one another rushing out the door.

“Oh thank two suns,” Jenny breathed a heavy sigh of relief. The illusion above her faded into nothingness, the threat having passed.

“I have no idea what happened,” Angel said, “but I’m still very proud of you, Jenny.”

“Angel!” Jenny rushed to her adoptive father, but was stopped by the restraining spell that still surrounded him. She could see cracks in the field, and when she touched it she could feel it beginning to fade, “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I designed a spell to infect the weapons and to protect my family but I didn’t test it and…”

“Jenny, take a breath,” Angel said, trying to control his tone. The overwhelming relief he felt, now that Jenny was safe, made it difficult to speak, “focus, honey. Can you break this field, or do we need to contact the team?”

Jenny tapped the field, and listened, “It’s degrading by itself. In two hours, it should …”

Angel felt his stomach clench as Jenny’s eyes were drawn to the gurney. The weapons that she’d liberated from the failsafe were on the ground in pieces, but she realized that something was missing.

“The book…” Jenny whispered breathlessly, “where’s the book?”

“What book?”

“The book! There was a book along with all the other weapons, and…and…” Jenny shouted. Her mind began racing, as she realized what knowledge might have been contained, the damage that could be done with it. She’d heard stories of how books from Wolfram and Hart literally contained everything that was ever written, and knew it was more than possible.

And Jenny knew what that meant. Spells to remove souls. The blueprints for nuclear bombs. A list of any spy, anywhere. The recipe for nerve gas. And that was just the tip of it.

Eve could have each and every one of those, and more, at her fingertips. The damage that she could do was beyond Jenny’s imagination, and the young genius had no shortage of that.

 “…what did I do?”

“Jenny, calm down,” Angel said, but Jenny couldn’t hear him.

All Jenny heard was her heart pounding as she realized the depth of her betrayal.

Angel had rescued her. He fed, sheltered and protected her, all for the sake of a dead, worthless slave, a cow.

And she betrayed him. She betrayed him and armed his greatest enemies. The reasons didn’t matter, because it wasn’t as if she could claim ignorance. He and Wesley had done everything they could to dissuade her, but she in her bullheaded ignorance defied them and now…

And it didn’t end there.

Jenny had betrayed Faith. She’d betrayed her mother’s memory.  She’d betrayed Spike. She’d betrayed Kate and Connor, and Lorne and everyone who’d ever shown her kindness.

 The weight of it all rested on her shoulders, and it was suffocating.

Jenny would have screamed if she had the breath.

“Jenny, it’s okay,” Angel could hear her heart pounding, and how she struggled to catch her breath. He’d seen enough panic attacks in his long undead life to recognize one (hell, he had causing them down to a science), “just relax. Focus on my voice. When I get out of here, we’ll make everything alright, I swear to you.”

Jenny’s stomach flipped.

“I…I…” Jenny’s mind went two separate ways.

The fear that he might kill her. Beat her within an inch of her life, and then end her like she knew she deserved.

Jenny could remember no shortage of beatings, the agony and humiliation that accompanied them. But this was the only time in her young life she could remember, that without question, she would actually deserve it. The torn flesh, the searing pain, Jenny didn’t know if she could bear that again, not now, not knowing that she was truly to blame for her own suffering.

But, somehow, just as strong, was the fear that he’d forgive her. That he’d look at her terrible crime, look at her and just…brush it off. Give her absolution she could never deserve. 

“I have to go,” Jenny said softly.

Angel felt ice in his veins, “…what?”

“I…I have to go,” Jenny said through sobs, “I can’t…I can’t stay.”

“Jenny, stop!” Angel slammed his fists against the force-field, “you don’t have to do this!”

“Yes,” Jenny sobbed, “yes, I do.”

“Jenny!”

Angel threw himself against the field with every ounce of strength his vampire biology granted him. His fists smashed into mystical energy, and he held nothing back, each and every blow would have killed a dozen men.

But in the time it took Angel to create a single new crack, Jenny Burkle was gone.

 

 

 

 


	30. Chapter 30

Jenny tried to blink the sleep away from her eyes. The last twelve hours had been exhausting, both physically and emotionally.

Since running away from Angel, Jenny had run straight to Wesley’s storage locker. She found some supplies, too much for her to carry. But there was a backpack full of maps and cash, so Jenny grabbed that and rushed off.

She was just inside the canopy of a bus station when the most important question on her life up until now hit her like a sack of bricks.

What now?

Jenny knew she couldn’t go home again, not after what she’d done. Facing Angel and Connor, she couldn’t imagine looking them in the eyes, not with the shame that churned in her stomach, to say nothing of the rest of her family.

And Faith? Just the idea of facing her made Jenny equal parts sick and terrified. Someone she admired so much for her strength and character, the young hybrid couldn’t see any confrontation with her ending well.  

Jenny rubbed her eyes, as she fought to stay awake and make a plan. All she had in mind when she left Angel was to run, to run as far and fast away as she could and just maybe escape the shame of it all.

As plans went, it was far from perfect.

Jenny jumped when three men sat down behind her. If they noticed her, they gave no indication, but all the same Jenny pulled her hoodie tighter. The more anyone saw of her, the more pained she felt.

“So I was thinking about pitching a script…” began the first man, “but I’m having some trouble deciding on my villain’s motivation.”

“How so?” said the second man.

“I can’t decide on my villain’s depiction,” said the first man.

“What’s to decide?” asked the Third man.

“Whether or not they should be evil, or incompetent,” said the first man.

Jenny tried not to listen, but their words rattled around her in head.

“I say incompetent,” said the second man, “you know about Chernobyl, right? The entire meltdown occurred because some people in management wanted to practice what would happen in the event of a meltdown.  So they ignored warnings, violated safety procedure, all knowingly until it was too late. A lot of people died, all because of a few stupid decisions.”

“But what about evil and incompetent?” said the third man.

“You…may be unto something,” said the first man, “I mean, think of all the damage they could do! They could unleash plagues that kill them too and have no antidote, unleash monsters that they have no idea the potential of, use bombs that destroy buildings, the possibilities are endless!”

Jenny felt like she wanted to throw up. Every word said by the three men cut her to the quick, because with all her brilliance, Jenny couldn’t think of a single thing to deny the truth of their words.

“What did I do…?”

“You made your father’s enemies strong, by giving toys to children.”

Jenny nearly jumped out of her skin when the three men suddenly appeared before her. Jenny somehow couldn’t make out their faces, as a searing light was cast all around them but she watched in horror as their bodies became more animalistic. Their heads and hands changed in shadow, into something primal.

The ground beneath her feet became a field of skulls, as if it has always been, and the air began to taste of copper as the sky became blood red.

“Look at this, this world of your creation,” they said in unison, “you were a slave, a thing. And they took you in, gave you a home

“You thought you were so smart…” 

Jenny saw the sun blotted out in the sky.

“And yet you were played like a fiddle…”

Jenny watched in horror as the three men became something else, something demonic. Despite all the things Jenny had seen or researched, her brain struggled to perceive, to even understand what she was looking at.

But on a fundamental level, Jenny knew instantly to whom she was speaking to.

“The Senior Partners…” Jenny breathed. She felt like a mouse facing a herd of lions, and knew they could swallow her up with the same effort people use to blink.

“You thought yourself smarter than your elders,” they said as one, “and look what happened. Do you think you could correct your mistake in a thousand lifetimes? The vampire still hasn’t, and he’s lived centuries!”

“No…I never meant…!” Jenny shook, both in fear from being in the presence of an ancient evil, and because this unholy alliance of evil was so right about her.

“We could fix this,” they said as one, “you know of how we changed the world entire for your brother. Fixing your comedy of errors is effortless by comparison.”

“I…,” Jenny knew what they wanted, and she didn’t think she had a right to refuse. With guilt gripping her heart, she reached out, and…

“Hey!” A hand grabbed Jenny from behind and whipped her around. When Jenny regained her bearings, she saw that an impossibly beautiful woman had placed herself between Jenny and three of the most ancient and powerful evils in existence.

Jenny was in awe of how the woman regarded the Senior Partners. The three demons ruled entire dimensions, could change reality itself and brought low empires without effort.

Anyone who knew of them, who had any inclination of their power, would have been at least respectful, but she had an angry, dismissive scowl on her face as she stood between Jenny and them with no hesitation at all.

“What’s the big idea here? You know that contracts drafted in dreams are illegal with humans!” she said, growing angrier with each word.

“That thing is not…”

“The unspoken accords recognize parentage granted through the mother,” the woman said, “and her mother was the most human person I ever met! So yeah, buzz off, loser triad!”

“Yes,” said the Senior Partners, “leaving her child to pain and suffering. So very human.”

“Oh whatever,” The woman waved her hand, and the Senior Partners vanished, and the world around them became a simple plain, with grass as far as the eye could see, “even if I was actually breathing, you losers still wouldn’t be worth the breath.”

The woman turned around, and Jenny realized she recognized her twice. She recognized her voice from the time she was sent back to Pylea, the voice that guided her to the safety of her cave and now, her face from all the photographs in her father’s room.

“…Cordelia?”

“Hey, sweetie,” Cordelia smiled at her. She knelt down to eye level, “guess you picked up the family knack for getting in trouble, huh? Kinda hard to avoid, I guess, when it’s runs in the entire family, adopted or otherwise.”

“I made a terrible mistake…” Jenny said softly, “I never meant to…and now…!”

 “I know, honey, I know,” Cordelia gave her a gentle hug, “but stop acting like it’s over before it’s barely begun. Your family’s a lot tougher than you give them credit for.”

“I just…I just wanted to help my friend!” Jenny said.

“You made a mistake, honey, believe you me, we’ve all been there,” Cordelia said, “and we’ve all come out the other side. The only mistake you’re making right now is not trusting your family. I bet they’re as green as you with worry!”

“No, I can’t go back!” Jenny pulled away from Cordelia’s hug, “I can’t…!”

“Honey, sweetie, please, calm down!”

“I can never go back!”

Jenny snapped awake, and found herself alone, in a city of millions.

“I…can never go back.”

_Later_

Jenny found purchasing a ticket to Las Vegas easier than it should have been. She took her ticket, waited for her bus and when it boarded, got on without much issue.

Jenny was wallowing in so much guilt, so much misery, she never noticed how no one else was boarding the bus. She barely took notice of how the bus driver left the bus idling.

But she couldn’t help but notice when a certain slayer plopped down next to her.

“Hey kiddo,” Faith smiled, with that trademark cocky grin, “where we heading?”

Jenny felt as if her body had just stopped. As if every function, brain, heart and lungs were just paused. And behind that pause, Jenny felt a swell of terror that she feared would crush her entire sense of self. Something she’d never felt before, even when facing down the rage of her slave masters.

“Vegas? Texas, maybe?” Faith said.

“…I…”

“I’d hold off on the Texas trip, unfortunately,” Faith said, “but we could make it work, if we had to.”

“…you…”

“Ya know, San Fran isn’t that bad this time of year. Hell of a lot closer, too. Ever thought about going there?”

“…what…”

“What what? Spit it out,” Faith flicked Jenny’s horn.

“Oww! Stop that! You know I hate that!”

Faith raised an eyebrow, “She speaks. In complete sentences.”

“What are you doing here?” Jenny said softly.

“Keeping you from doing something amazingly stupid,” Faith said, “kinda an expert there, on both amazing and stupid.”

“How can you joke like this?” Jenny said, “after I…”

“Screwed up epically?” Faith said, “like I said, I’m an expert there. Ready to come home now?”

“…how can you be so flip?”

“Practice.”

“Stop it!” Jenny screamed, “stop joking, stop…stop pretending like what I did was nothing!”

“Look, believe me, I know what you’re going through, but it’s not the end of the world,” Faith said.

“It could be!”

“And if it is, we’ll stop it,” Faith said, “it’s kinda what we do. Did that long before you were on the scene too.”

“And how many people will die because of me?” Jenny said, “I can’t face Gunn, Spike and everyone else! Not after I spit in the face of everything they’ve done!”

“Yes you can,” Faith said, “I know it’s tough, and I know it’ll be hard, but you’re strong enough to face this.”

“You don’t know anything!” Jenny snapped.

“Well, I knew you’d be stubborn about this,” Faith said, “and I knew you wouldn’t believe me when I said I know what it’s like to screw up like you did. Hell, I’ll prove it.”

Faith reached into her pocket, and removed a silver spider.

“Remember this puppy?” Faith said.

Jenny said nothing, baffled. Faith already knew her sins, so why she was carrying a mystic artifact designed to elicit the truth puzzled the young hybrid.

Faith slapped it on her own wrist, “Turns out, you can use it on yourself, with slightly different results.”

“Faith, what are you…?”

“Two plus two equals five.”

Jenny watched in horror as Faith jerked, her muscles tightening and her face contorting in agony.

“Faith!”

“Woo!” Faith shook her head, “God damn, that’ll wake you up!”

“What did you do that for?!” Jenny demanded.

“You think you’re the only one who’s screwed up royally?” Faith said, “honey, not even close.”

“Whatever you’ve done, it can’t begin to compare to…”

“I tried to kill Angel.”

Jenny’s jaw dropped.

Faith held up the silver spider on her wrist, “Cross my heart.”

“…what?”

“I was kinda hoping to never tell you this,” Faith said, with a heavy sigh, “wasn’t just once. Was a couple times, in fact.”

Jenny watched in horror as Faith’s became a mask of pain.

“God damn it!” Faith shook her wrist, trying to dispel the agony that had been coursing through her veins moments before, “this silver thing disagrees on the definition of a couple, apparently.”

“Are you okay?” Jenny whispered. A million thoughts were pin-balling through her head, but seeing Faith in pain was enough to push that aside.

“Four by five, I’d say,” Faith grunted. Years of practice enabled her to present a picture of recovery, “not liking this thing, at all.”

“Why are you even using that horrid thing?” Jenny said.

“Make sure you believe me,” Faith said, “you’ve seen this pup…spider in action.”

“Then, it’s true?” Jenny’s voice was a mix of confusion and disbelief, “you tried to kill Angel?”

“’Fraid so,” Faith said, “it’s a long story, and if you want to know it all we can discuss it later. But I tried to kill him, his girlfriend, various associates, succeeded in poisoning him, and later even tortured a friend of his. But that wasn’t to kill him, so much as it was to get him to kill me.”

“…why?” Jenny said.

“I made a mistake,” Faith said, “and I let it spiral out of control from there, until the only way I could see to make everything right, was to die. But you know who refused to let that happen? Who refused to give up on me?”

“Dad?” Jenny said on reflex.

“That’s right, your dad,” Faith said, “Angel didn’t give up on me, when a lot of other people did. And maybe he held on longer than he should have. But he still pulled me back. You did wrong, kiddo, no denying it, but people have done worse, myself included. But we’ve come back from it, and so can you sweetheart.”

“I don’t deserve it,” Jenny said, softly, “not after…”

“You are still the best thing in my life,” Faith said, “and I know Angel feels the same way. Don’t give me that ‘I don’t deserve it’ crap. Been there, done that, got the post card.”

Faith jumped in pain, and clutched her wrist.

“God damn it, that was just an expression!”

“Take that horrible thing off!” Jenny said, “I’ll believe whatever you say, just stop hurting yourself!”

Faith took the silver spider from her wrist, and winced, “I only meant to do it once, sprout. Sorry to worry you.”

“You shouldn’t have done it even once!” Jenny snapped.

“Would you have believed me I hadn’t?” Faith said.  

“…no,” Jenny said.

“It ain’t easy accepting that the people we look up to ain’t perfect,” Faith said, “and I’m about as far from perfect as ya get.”

“It doesn’t change how I feel about you,” Jenny said softly.

“You have no idea how happy that makes me feel,” Faith said, “lets play a game, kiddo. Lets pretend that I’d ever allow any kid, let alone my own, runaway to who knows where. Lets pretend that I won’t drag you back home for your own good, no matter what. Would you come back to the Hyperion with me?”

Faith reached out her hand, “Please?”

Jenny took her hand without a word.

“I know it may not feel like it,” Faith said, “but the hardest part is over now.”  

 


End file.
